Alec Baldwin: Father of the Year
It’s not often that I, Dick Masterson, bestow an award like Father of the Year. In fact this is the only time I’ve ever done it. But who knows what the future holds. Submit your nominations for 2008 today!
Alec Baldwin, legendary for his roles in Beetlejuice and She’s Having a Baby, recently left a passionate voice mail for his 11 year old daughter. When I think of “father” I think “passion”. Do you know what a father’s role is? To protect a useless little girl from a world of horrible things. Without a father, who would beat off the hordes of horny boys young girls naturally attract?
Being a father is just like being in the movie The 300. That’s awesome. Way to go Dad’s.
Here’s a quote from Alec Baldwin’s voicemail.
“This crap you pull on me with this goddamn phone situation that you would never dream of doing to your mother”
Amen, brother. The amount of crap young ladies pull with their cellphone is staggering, no matter how esoteric it’s worded.
Look, fatherhood is an accident. There has never been a time where a man looked at a woman and said, “You want to be a mother? Yea, that’s a good idea.” And he wasn’t sarcastic when he said it. Nine times out of ten, it’s accidental.
As a man, when I listen to Alec Baldwin’s passionate discourse with his young daughter, which I’m linking to at the end of this article, I think of two things. The first thing is, “Hey, good for you buddy. Here’s a man-thanks from the rest of us. Someone’s got to tell this woman this shit eventually and you’re the only one who’s not going to lose sex over it.” The second thing I think is, “Who fucked this up in the first place.”
Like always, to me the answer is obvious: Kim Bassinger.
Women fuck up everything. The Garden of Eden, The Beatles, Mel Gibson, Iraq; women are the vagina in the ointment of life. Here’s another thing women fucked up. What kind of mother posts a recording of her baby’s daddy flipping the fuck out on the internet? I’ll tell you exactly what kind of mother.
Every mother.
Women are the worst parents in the world and ten times worse than all other types of parents. Women are so possessive over their children that they would eat their father’s heads if they weren’t so goddamn afraid of the Repo Man. Women will do anything and everything to get a father’s influence out of their child’s life. If Kim Basinger would stoop so low as to post this shit on the internet, then what else has she done? Has she taught her 11 year old daughter about sex? Who’s to say she hasn’t! Women shouldn’t be taught about sex until they’re 25.
Has Alec Baldwin ever posted scandalous and embarrassing shit perpetrated by Kim Basinger against his daughter on the internet? Does Alec Baldwin have a website called, “The Time Kim Basinger Thought About Shooting Some Tequila While She Was Pregnant.com”? No. Of course not. Alec Baldwin is so classy he could tell a Muppet to go fuck itself and I would probably buy it.
All women have thought about shooting Tequila while they’re pregnant. Women are a weak and corruptible bunch. Alec Baldwin is MenAreBetterThanWomen.com’s Father of the Year.
Baldwin Lays it Down Like A Man
The Aftermath
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April 22nd, 2007 at 3:40 pm - IP Man-Hash: d4fa8b220332f
Oh it’s on bitch *draws sword* (Without the sexual innuendo thank you). Come here and I’ll slice you up 5 ways till Monday. By the way, its NecroSWORDSMAN. Respect the title BEEYOTCH.
Note: His name is Alec not Alex. How are you going to kill the guy when you don’t know his name?
Typical.
Dead Can Dance - The host of Seraphin
April 22nd, 2007 at 8:47 pm - IP Man-Hash: aaaa8e6ade09a
Women love to make threats.. lol
Get a load of this one.. A criminal justice professor was arrested on charges of making threats against herself. Can you say attention whore?
Retired from law enforcement agency gone into teaching. Only a woman would do something this stupid. Class C felony.
Decatur News
She even mentioned a virgina tech repeat at ehr school. She should have known they would track her phone.
She deserves the Dumbest criminal of the year award!
April 22nd, 2007 at 9:03 pm - IP Man-Hash: aaaa8e6ade09a
Just as I thought..
Alec is going through the usual custody BS. Mom is using the child to retaliate against Alec because Alec didn’t put up with her shit.
Women who play this game should lose custody. Simple and fair.
CNN -Alec
April 23rd, 2007 at 6:01 am - IP Man-Hash: d4fa8b220332f
We should send an e-mail from all of us at Mabtw.com saying we support him fully and we are all behind him against his stupid wife.
April 23rd, 2007 at 8:57 am - IP Man-Hash: 5e32b3f9ccec1
Funny, I was just thinking along the same lines. How would you contact a guy like that?
April 24th, 2007 at 2:08 am - IP Man-Hash: c406e944e31e4
Do you work for Nokia, it may help. Seriously, I’d buy a phone Alec endorsed, or Russell. They know what their doing with those things. Diamatik, unfortunately, does not. Leave the phone alone diamatik, leave it.
April 24th, 2007 at 4:34 am - IP Man-Hash: 4555637db20cf
Excuse me, miss, but I don’t do Nokia. I am 100% “Hello, Moto,” for your information. A1200 to be exact. I love that damn phone so much. You see, it is not widely available in the Western Hemishphere, and it isn’t marketed here either. I just love the look those damn ‘Blackberry’ users give me when I pull out my black Ming. Priceless!
April 24th, 2007 at 5:17 am - IP Man-Hash: c406e944e31e4
I’m thinking of throwing my cell phone out. I have just been accused of playing games for responding to a txt message 12 hours late. Apparently 4hrs or even 8hrs is okay, but 12hrs is not acceptable. I will tell you what is not acceptable, men telling women what is an acceptable time period in which to respond to a text msg!! There has been too much phone abuse this week, I can’t take it anymore!
April 24th, 2007 at 5:45 am - IP Man-Hash: aaaa8e6ade09a
Really! You should get a rope and end it all right now.
April 24th, 2007 at 7:48 am - IP Man-Hash: d4fa8b220332f
Mobile phones are bad because they cause cancer.
April 24th, 2007 at 7:49 am - IP Man-Hash: 5e32b3f9ccec1
Or a razor blade… To cut the modem wire.
April 24th, 2007 at 7:56 am - IP Man-Hash: d4fa8b220332f
And waste a perfectly good modem?
April 24th, 2007 at 8:12 am - IP Man-Hash: 5e32b3f9ccec1
LMAO :P
April 24th, 2007 at 1:18 pm - IP Man-Hash: c46011aeb3b2a
Two comments:
1) Guys, I’ve been a lurker here for a couple of weeks and need to reprimand many of you. Why do you even bother responding to anything any of these broads say? First of all, they shouldn’t even be on this site. Second, it’s just a waste of time, even in the rare occasion one of them accidentally says something worthwhile. Just do what we all do in real life when the little hens cackle on and on and on: Ignore it and think about tits.
2) Having had a similar experience as Alec Baldwin’s (minus the fame and money, of course), I can really identify with this. This wasn’t his best moment, but this was a private moment that was exploited, putting this daughter in the middle. Like everyone else, I don’t really know what’s going on between Alec and Kim Basinger, but all I can say is she seems to be a cunt and I hope she goes to hell.
April 24th, 2007 at 1:55 pm - IP Man-Hash: 980cc8a8ac1a7
So the Spartans can pass her round!
April 24th, 2007 at 2:17 pm - IP Man-Hash: 4555637db20cf
Very manly advice, indeed. Oh, on a side note (so please don’t take any offence), I think that the beer bearing your name is overrated.
April 24th, 2007 at 2:33 pm - IP Man-Hash: c46011aeb3b2a
Very manly advice, indeed. Oh, on a side note (so please don’t take any offence), I think that the beer bearing your name is overrated.
So do I, but I needed a handle for this site, and according to family lore my forebears are the New England Adamses (I don’t believe it for a moment, though).
April 24th, 2007 at 4:11 pm - IP Man-Hash: d22c2cf91a332
Hello Dick,
Sheryl Crow may be right, Women need to wipe every time they go to the bathroom. Men don’t we can shake off the excess. Women use more naturaul resourses than men.
April 24th, 2007 at 5:28 pm - IP Man-Hash: 476edc70811b6
Sheryl Crow is wrong about everything.
April 24th, 2007 at 5:30 pm - IP Man-Hash: 476edc70811b6
Sam Adams, the problem with this medium is there are no tits to look at to forget about the fact that an idiot is voicing it’s opinion.