Alec Baldwin: Father of the Year
It’s not often that I, Dick Masterson, bestow an award like Father of the Year. In fact this is the only time I’ve ever done it. But who knows what the future holds. Submit your nominations for 2008 today!
Alec Baldwin, legendary for his roles in Beetlejuice and She’s Having a Baby, recently left a passionate voice mail for his 11 year old daughter. When I think of “father” I think “passion”. Do you know what a father’s role is? To protect a useless little girl from a world of horrible things. Without a father, who would beat off the hordes of horny boys young girls naturally attract?
Being a father is just like being in the movie The 300. That’s awesome. Way to go Dad’s.
Here’s a quote from Alec Baldwin’s voicemail.
“This crap you pull on me with this goddamn phone situation that you would never dream of doing to your mother”
Amen, brother. The amount of crap young ladies pull with their cellphone is staggering, no matter how esoteric it’s worded.
Look, fatherhood is an accident. There has never been a time where a man looked at a woman and said, “You want to be a mother? Yea, that’s a good idea.” And he wasn’t sarcastic when he said it. Nine times out of ten, it’s accidental.
As a man, when I listen to Alec Baldwin’s passionate discourse with his young daughter, which I’m linking to at the end of this article, I think of two things. The first thing is, “Hey, good for you buddy. Here’s a man-thanks from the rest of us. Someone’s got to tell this woman this shit eventually and you’re the only one who’s not going to lose sex over it.” The second thing I think is, “Who fucked this up in the first place.”
Like always, to me the answer is obvious: Kim Bassinger.
Women fuck up everything. The Garden of Eden, The Beatles, Mel Gibson, Iraq; women are the vagina in the ointment of life. Here’s another thing women fucked up. What kind of mother posts a recording of her baby’s daddy flipping the fuck out on the internet? I’ll tell you exactly what kind of mother.
Every mother.
Women are the worst parents in the world and ten times worse than all other types of parents. Women are so possessive over their children that they would eat their father’s heads if they weren’t so goddamn afraid of the Repo Man. Women will do anything and everything to get a father’s influence out of their child’s life. If Kim Basinger would stoop so low as to post this shit on the internet, then what else has she done? Has she taught her 11 year old daughter about sex? Who’s to say she hasn’t! Women shouldn’t be taught about sex until they’re 25.
Has Alec Baldwin ever posted scandalous and embarrassing shit perpetrated by Kim Basinger against his daughter on the internet? Does Alec Baldwin have a website called, “The Time Kim Basinger Thought About Shooting Some Tequila While She Was Pregnant.com”? No. Of course not. Alec Baldwin is so classy he could tell a Muppet to go fuck itself and I would probably buy it.
All women have thought about shooting Tequila while they’re pregnant. Women are a weak and corruptible bunch. Alec Baldwin is MenAreBetterThanWomen.com’s Father of the Year.
Baldwin Lays it Down Like A Man
The Aftermath
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Clever..
But that would never be the case, you see. I have a wonderful father who, for these past 18 years that I’ve been on this earth, taught me many splendid and valuable lessons. One of those lessons is to be independent; To never become reliant or dependent on another individual. So far, so good. And I have a very good feeling that it shall remain that way.
Now that’s some funny shit.
Only useful purpose in trolls, is sharpening the witty one liners on them. Sort of like how swords used to be temper quenched in the live bodies of war prisoners. Entertainment that serves a useful purpose.
Ahh, if only to have been born into the good old days…
Yep, and even overly english uninterestingly accurate to the Nth dimensional gate.
How about you say something other than braying, Jack ass?
My subscription expired when I wouldn’t pay your welfare bill……
Now that THAT is out of the way, remember not to let the door hit you in your overly uninteresting ass on the way out……….
Overly uninteresting? Ha, why don’t you just subscribe to all my respondings right now and call it a night.
I know that Doubt knows, so “We” all know. Duh. All men know all things.
And we all know you talk too damned much.
No, your opinions are irritating, overly uninteresting, unuseful, not insightful, and of course, they are something you take as Fact & Truth.
She would make a good addition to my house foundation. Remember, it is only against the law if you get caught, my friends.
“We all know” - You don’t know.
“Your opinions are uneducated, shallow, and perfectly forgettable” - Just like this? :
You just talk on and on. We all know that in reality you would see a man beaten to death before you admitted to your own irresponsibility. That is why what you have to say does not matter to us - you are stupid, and a liar - a bad liar - in addition to that. Your opinions are uneducated, shallow, and perfectly forgettable.
Sgt. Reyes, I wholeheartedly agree. The criminal justice system is (for lack of a better word) fucked. There will always be biases and injustice in the system sad to say. I hate the double standards. What I am sorry about is the case you mentioned. THAT is a shame, and reflects one of the many flaws in our courts. I’m a freshman in college so I haven’t been able to take many classes on criminal justice and the legal system, but one doesn’t need to to know about all the disadvantages and problems there are. That man deserved to be heard from the start.
When a woman attempts to poison a Man’s children against him it’s wrong and she should be smacked down in courts as most court orders specifically forbid it. I know mine does and if I ever hear that bitch open her mouth in a negative way it’s getting recorded.
Problem is, the judge won’t do a damn thing. I heard from a local police officer that a Man came in and complained every day for a year that his Ex-wife was violating a court order and that she was not adhering to visitation. ONE WHOLE YEAR OF POLICE REPORTS. When brought to the judge she did nothing.
Freedom, liberty and justice for none, well, at least not Men.
- Sgt. Reyes
You are on our site. You will deal with all of us. You only serve as a case-study for the inhumanely inferior, superficial little Western hogs. Because stagnant society contains inflated fuckbox garbage, the entire product has become contaminated. I can not tolerate the very thought of contributing to your petty, shallow existence so I will not.
Oh Doubt, I’m quite aware I wasn’t directly asked but thank you. I know you own the internet and all, and I’m terribly sorry if my postings have become a huge bother to you. And when I say I’m terribly sorry what I really mean is that I simply don’t care what you think about me (yet again, this is the internet. how foolish of you to think i’d care if you did..) or what you have to say. Well, let me rephrase that: I don’t care what you have to say UNLESS it has some sort of reasoning behind it. Which would not include “i can tell from your name . . . that you are stupid”. Now does that really sound intelligent or witty to you? If you don’t want to read my posts, simply don’t read them. In all seriousness, I’m not spamming, I’m not attacking everyone, I’m simply responding to a couple posts here and there- No reason to overreact unless you find it threatening.
PS- Forcing myself on you all? I was never aware of that being my intention, but alright. I guess you know best..
Nobody asked you what you saw. I can tell from your name all I would ever care to know about you - that you are stupid.
Let’s play a game. Someone will ask you a question and then you will arrive at our site and you will answer us. If nobody asks you a question, apparantly nobody really cares enough about your pasty existence to give a shit.
Stop forcing yourself on us - it gets old very fast. No means no, girly-girl.
Hmm, all i saw (when reading the transcript of it long, long ago) was an angry man who didn’t know how to control his own emotions. Who didn’t know how to react calmly and rationally. If a mother left that msg on a young child’s voicemail I would say the same. So it doesn’t even have to do with gender. I do agree with Dick when he mentioned the role of the father (protector) and I do as well think “passion” when it comes to the fatherhood. But see, there are different types of passion. With everything there is good and bad. His way of expressing his “passion” (if that’s what one would call it, I suppose so..), I think he could have taken a better route. Not be “easy”, you can be strong and firm without verbally attacking like a wild dog with rabies.
I want to give you bigot of the year award!
i personally don’t think that what he did was so bad
but you shouldn’t award someone for hurting his daughter
whoops!
i keep on forgetting whose site this is!
Alec,
I guess it’d help if I left you contact info:
John M. Gorts Cell: (561) 613-2377 FAX: (561) 243-8531
CEO and President
American Divorce Insurance, Inc.
1730 South Federal Hwy #325
Delray Beach, FL 33483-3309
Alec, You are the hero of millions of dads who say enough is fucking enough! My satan-ex has cut me off from any contact from my daughter Jessica who used to loved me before my ex-”Nancy” poisoned her with lies. All I ever did was love her, spend more time with her than my dad ever did, and spend money I earned to ensure she had a better life than I did. My thanks, was to have her ignore my every letter, birthday card, Xmas card and ultimately hang up on me when I tried to navigate the mine field (my ex’s lawyer created) of the school district to try to reach her for the first time in 2 years. It get’s better…now the court sez that since I’ve had no contact with her for 2 yrs., I don’t have the right to since she’s had no contact with me. And liberty and justice for none.
I have created and formed American Divorce Insurance Inc. out of the pain and suffering I lived through thanks to a bitch ex-wife like Kim. I’m genuinely trying to get Insurance Companies to partner with me so that MEN finally get the legal, financial and emotional protection they deserve in this anti-men society Dads find themselves in. If you know of any key contacts at Insurance companies who could help with my endeavor, please let me know!! My patent # is 11/833,681 and my trademark number for Divorce Insurance FOR MEN IS #77170725. I’m not rich and I don’t want charity, I just want to make a difference so that no man has to endure the suffering I’ve gone through as a Dad at the hands of our ball chopping legal system.
If it sounds like I’m passionate, it’s because I am. I don’t know how to E-mail you the Word 2007/2003 version of my patent, but if you let me know what your E-mail is, I’ll be happy to send it to you.
You are not alone, my friend. Someone forgot that Dads have rights in this country, and I want to help correct that. Anything you can do I appreciate.
And yes, I love your movies. Beetlejuice was my favorite and you are way way too hard on yourself…you were great!
I think the Guy is at the end of his tether. In isolation, that call is really f***ed up. But, you have to wonder how he got into that state. He made the Cardinal Sin in dealing with women though : Getting sucked in to their bulls*** emotional maelstrom. I mean, what would James Bond do? The absolute worst thing you can do with a stupid female is start shouting at them.. That just brings you down to their level. If you give them enough rope, they will hang themselves a thousand times over.
PS Kim looked gross in 8 Mile. Says a lot for her ‘acting’ ability compared to say, Jodie Foster. Most actresses are finished when they are too old to be jacked off to.
Me thinks Ireland is gonna be another Hollywood horror story.
Fair enough. I guess there were lots of non-gay homos then: Alex the Great, Richard the Lionhearted, Laurence of Arabia, Julius Caesar, Publius Cornelius Scipio Africanus, Shi Huang Di(king Of Qin and first emperor of China), etc.
P Coderch
He’s attracted to males without the pansy ass feminine attitude?
Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha…what the fuck is a non-gay homo? Just wondering…
P Coderch