Are Those Catepillars on Your Face or Crayon?
Have you ever seen women’s eyebrows? I can sum them up in one word: fucking gross.
It’s hilarious that women will do everything short of sewing a giant, fuck-off, red A for “Attention Whore” on the clothing of women who get their breasts enhanced, but women can’t stop fucking with their eyebrows. It’s the same thing.
Oh wait it’s not. It’s the same thing except one is gross and one is gorgeous.
Of all the stupid, time-wasting, bullshit, masturbatory exercises women engage in for the sake of Cosmetique, eyebrow art is by far the stupidest and most masturbatory. Who are women gardening their eyebrows for anyway? Men? Do any men subscribe to Hot Eyebrows Monthly? I’ve never even heard of that publication and I’ve heard of a lot of them; so I doubt it.
How about women then? No I’m pretty sure it isn’t women either. Women don’t look other women in the face in the first place.
That’s not common knowledge either, that women don’t look other women in the eye when they’re speaking to each other, but it is true. See, women always bitch about how men constantly stare at their chests while completely dominating them in any conversation, but women are exactly the same. It’s a species thing. It’s got nothing to do with sex.
It’s the same way artists and advertisers utilize white space to manipulate the eye. There are certain things the human gaze is simply drawn to — magnetically. White space on the one hand and in the other, boobs. Don’t let women make you feel bad for being a human being.
It must be caterpillars then. Women shave their eyebrows to make sure caterpillars don’t try to have sex with their faces while they’re sleeping.
I guess that’s crazy isn’t it! Well, moisturizer and anti wrinkle creams don’t do shit and women still use them. Is that less crazy than plucking your eyebrows due to a caterpillar narcofornophobia? That means a fear of caterpillars having sex with your eyebrows in your sleep, or as women prefer to call it: date rape.
Women are all beautiful and special things — each one like a beautiful summer day or a classic Cadillac convertible — and they just don’t realize it. Women and their natural bodies and eyebrows disgust them. That’s why they do stupid shit like pencil them in and are extremely uptight all the time about walking around the house in a bra.
What is the big fucking deal about that anyway? It’s called a compromise.
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June 5th, 2006 at 8:03 am - IP Man-Hash: 029450a5e585d
lol
I just can’t agree with this. Sarcasm maybe or just showing the way women think. Mabye Dick hasn’t been to the USA, there are plenty of beached whales wondering around thinking they are beautiful.
All women think every woman is a beautfiful until their BF or hubby says something nice about them. It’s funny to watch these women change their opinion of those he says is a natural beauty. They believe only women have the ability to judge beauty. retards
June 5th, 2006 at 8:05 am - IP Man-Hash: 5950bb08d3016
This article took the words right out of my man mouth.
For starters, as far as eyebrows go, I and most men on here will agree, eyebrows on women look good thicker rather than thinner. Maybe if you have a unibrow or super bushy ones you can fuck with it. But women that I’ve dated, and I hear this from other guys too, always complement a man’s eyebrows.
“You have perfect eyebrows” I’ve heard more than once from more than one person. That’s because I don’t pluck the shit out of them and then have to draw them back on later. It makes absolute sense to even a 4 year old boy, but women for some reason don’t get it.
#2 is the face cream and makeup thing.
Compare the face of a 45 year old man to a 45 year old woman. Notice the difference? While the man’s face looks as if he is still 30, the women’s face looks every bit her age, and why is that? Well, makeup clogs your pres as do all those shitty creams that don’t do anything, not to mention your face is greasy from them.
Women, do want your skin to look young? Ease up on the makeup. For most of you it doesn’t do anything anyways.
See this is simple cause and effect that most will never understand.
-omen pluck eyebrows, then draw them on later, eyes always look shitty
-Men do not touch eyebrows, eyebrows are perfect.
The magic answer here is leave them alone.
-Women use maekup and cream as a way to TRY to beautify and conceal, face and skin look shitty at hell I’ll even say 35.
-Men do no such thing, they age gracefully and skin looks good till 60.
THe magic answer based on cause and effect here: Stop putting shit on your skin.
June 5th, 2006 at 4:43 pm - IP Man-Hash: ee58a00bb64be
How about all he women trying to act like sailors, they cuss like crazy and wear tramp stamps aka tatoos.
Really tatoos on women usualy do nothing but make them look more like sluts. I suppose that is the intention.
Girls just Say no to TrampStamps
June 5th, 2006 at 5:20 pm - IP Man-Hash: b39671b23df39
Billy, you better believe that I’ve done that topic!
-Dick
June 5th, 2006 at 6:35 pm - IP Man-Hash: 8241bffc0206d
Dick a work of both literal and satiric wit.
-Strength and Honor
June 5th, 2006 at 8:50 pm - IP Man-Hash: 9fe794327d1c5
Agreed.