Ask Dick: My Girlfriend is Needy
I was sent this question by Max.
Dick, I’ve met this woman who obviously likes me, but she keeps her guard up as far as dating goes. She even told me thats why she got her dog a few years ago. Because the dog will always love her no matter what. What should I do?
I would have thought a man who shared his name with one of the manliest men in cinema, Mad Max, would know a thing or two about seeing through women and their endless bullshit.
Grab a sword and a piece of paper, Max. You and your shitty girlfriend are about to enter the Thunderdome.
Women are obsessed with control. That’s why they hate things like sports, midgets, and penises. Those things can never be controlled. And that’s exactly what women do when they put their “guard” up. They control what cannot be controlled.
The Penis.
Women have no reason to be afraid of anything. Imagine that you could say whatever you wanted without getting punched in the mouth. Imagine you could have a millionaire pay for your entire life with the right combination of make-up and shut-up. Imagine you were born with the unlimited line of credit that is a vagina. It doesn’t even have to be well maintained!
Why the fuck would you keep your guard up if you had nothing to be afraid of?
Man Lesson #1: Do not get a girlfriend.
Getting a girlfriend is like getting a running start before you jump off a cliff. No matter how fast you’re going, it’s still a step in the wrong direction.
Men Lesson #2: Fuck women’s dogs.
It takes a dog to love a woman. Any creature who can feed itself has little use for a permanently wound up Bitch-in-the-Box, ready to spring out at the spill of a soda.
Women need dogs the way men need brains, blood, and beer. Women need the concept of “unconditional love”. It pumps through their veins instead of blood and it nourishes their every waking moment. Unconditional love, which is stupid and insane, is the Sports of woman-kind.
Sports are an eternal test of skill and wits for the sole purpose of honing them both. It is very manly. Unconditional love can be used to describe the actions of mental patients and psychotics.
Man Lesson #3: Do not get a girlfriend.
We’ve all seen a cartoon donkey with a carrot hanging off of a stick just inches away from its face. Well that’s exactly what having a girlfriend will do to you, except instead of a carrot hanging in front of your face, it’ll be a big red STOP sign and a shitload of complaining. What needy girlfriends never seem to need is a reason to bitch and complain. If she’s complaining so much, why not give her a reason to be doing it. Hide all her pants or underwear or something.
There are few men who’ve gotten rich by listening to a bunch of fucking complaining all day. Usually, those men become priests.
The real question here, Max, is not what your girlfriend is keeping her guard up to keep out, it’s what she’s keeping her guard up to keep in. Control.
And also she’s probably a foul-mouthed sex maniac. All women are.
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October 20th, 2007 at 6:02 am - IP Man-Hash: 191d005c2ce6a
It’s a shame it doesn’t work the same over here as it does in the US because I certainly wouldn’t bail her out. She could rot there till the trial for all I’d care. But here she wouldn’t even have to post bail, just promise to pay it if she does a runner and for a case like being hit by a thrown wine glass the bail would be around 100 bucks. Joke, eh?
I would hate to live in America but there are somethings you guys have right and one of them is making it tough to get out of jail once arrested.
October 21st, 2007 at 2:54 am - IP Man-Hash: eb931023b77c5
No, but doesn’t it go against yours?
October 21st, 2007 at 3:48 am - IP Man-Hash: 2e9f52b62c482
I dont know where you got that from. I have proclaimed myself to be a chauvinist and a defender of the patriarchy so no, I dont believe in equality.
October 21st, 2007 at 4:14 am - IP Man-Hash: eb931023b77c5
So you don’t believe in equality of legal consequences and punishments then? Mmm, k, interesting.
October 21st, 2007 at 4:29 am - IP Man-Hash: f68191fe56ea6
To expect patriarchy is stupid and sexist. For the man and the woman. It’s ok though if thats what the couple wants.
October 21st, 2007 at 6:36 am - IP Man-Hash: 1ac5c1024cd8f
@ Female: Did I say that you god damn bitch?? I said I dont believe in equality. Why? Because it doesnt and will never exist. Am I supportive of equality? On a large number of things, yes. Do I believe it will work out? No.
@ Clair: You are on a sexist website, what the fuck do you expect? I will defend the patriarchy and ensure that it will continue to live on. How is it “stupid”? It has worked for 4000 years, retard.
October 21st, 2007 at 2:33 pm - IP Man-Hash: 23f61237efbe9
The patriarchy is, for the most part, a feminist invention. It is from this fabled patriarchy that feminists derive their victim mentality. It is the patriarchy that is oppressing them.
Yet you claim to defend this feminist concept, mansvoice? I find it odd that you would defend something that doesn’t really exist. Unless you are thinking of a completely different definition of patriarchy?
October 21st, 2007 at 3:48 pm - IP Man-Hash: 92db72c86765b
The way I understand it Luka, he doesn’t believe women should be firefighters. He probably does think it’s okay for courts to treat women equally, but they just shouldn’t be out there putting out fires if they can’t control the spray of the hose. It’s a man thing.
October 21st, 2007 at 4:03 pm - IP Man-Hash: 92db72c86765b
..perhaps you should have stayed there.
You’ve got cameras throughout your house that you monitor from your underground bunker, sorry, your workshop? Damn you are one weird *cough* scientist.
October 21st, 2007 at 6:57 pm - IP Man-Hash: 7381abe25f9d0
@female: Ah feeformale I see that you are back like bacteria- getting under men’s skin and irritating them. Surveillance cameras irritate women as they document reality; not the world your mind lives in. I’m not trying to convince you as i have already realized that if an aircraft carrier sized sledgehammer of gender truth whacked ya in the arse you would misinterpet it as a menstrual migraine.
October 21st, 2007 at 7:11 pm - IP Man-Hash: 2e9b52f9da52f
No wonder little girls have a little fit whenever pictures ‘ment 4 ur eyez only ;)’ end up getting leaked on the web.
That’s what happens when your little psychological impediments - I mean lifestyle - makes people hate you like that. When you expect the world to be served to you on a silver platter, your ass gets served to the world - among other things.
Now run along, little miss, with those little legs and wobbly little ass God gave you. See, such measures are necessary when whores like you initiate 4/5 divorces and yet still can expect child custody and, after you’ve stolen the man’s children from him, alimony to cover your third breast augmentation while your illegitimate children play in traffic.
Run along, now, little whore, your services are no longer needed here.
October 21st, 2007 at 7:37 pm - IP Man-Hash: 92db72c86765b
Three breasts?
Has anyone ever told you people that your view of reality is skewed?
October 21st, 2007 at 8:59 pm - IP Man-Hash: 92db72c86765b
Let me guess, let me guess, today you’re a dermatologist?
October 21st, 2007 at 9:30 pm - IP Man-Hash: f68191fe56ea6
It’s stupid in the sense that it’s unfair. It can create resentment, which in most cases leads to a relationship break down. If it’s worked for only 4 thousand years, keep in mind, that in comparison for how long humans have (or hominoid like creatures), it’s quite new new.
But, if you’d like, we could also mention other things that worked for thousands of years and then on second thought we realised ,”hey maybe that wasn’t such a good thing.”
October 21st, 2007 at 10:28 pm - IP Man-Hash: 2e9b52f9da52f
Uh, no. It doesn’t work that way. He was referring to history. If you include prehistory, it goes on far, far further back than that. I’d say 3 million years traceable, give or take, being that that’s probably the earliest recollection of the absolute humanist family-unit. And anything that lasts 4000 years is pretty solid. The womyn’s era has lasted 3 decades, placing it right past the Third Reich and about 40 years from the Soviet Union, and it’s largely starting to crumble already. Need I say Duke Rape?
Hell, it only survives in the affluent nations, it hasn’t even taken root in the naturalistic ones except when it was artificially forced on the indigenous peoples there.
Coincidentally, the second the womyn ‘peace-keepers’ leave, the second hatred towards the west surfaces and the bona fide feminism disappears.
October 21st, 2007 at 10:33 pm - IP Man-Hash: 2e9b52f9da52f
I’m telling you girls, you overstepped your authority. You had a good thing with ripping a man’s children from him and demanding unqualified positions, but you took it too far with the contradictions, directly-unconstitutional actions (shutting down the ‘anti-feminist propaganda machine’ with threats of legal consequences), placing men in prison under circumstantial evidence…
Too many to list here, really. The point is, you fucked up big time, and now it’s going to bite little girls like you right in your privileged ass. Try getting a job aside from regulated prostitution with a resume filled with ‘People skills’ when you can hardly establish eye contact with the 50ish interviewer without turning away and talking about having ‘multiple orgasm after orgasm.’ That is equality, and it stings like a cum-gagging whore.
The numerous sexual harassment cases may be documented and evaluated, also. Good luck even getting contacted with that reputation.
October 22nd, 2007 at 7:23 am - IP Man-Hash: de55713197a6e
I dont see how the patriarchy doesnt exist. It does. Men are in power, no? Read Doubt’s response on the issue to gain further insights on the history I was referring.
My definition of the patriarchy is a system whereby men are in power. In actual definition terms, control by men of a disproportionately large share of power . It has worked, as I said, for over 4000 years and I will continue to safeguard it.
@ Clair: Unfair? So typically female.
October 22nd, 2007 at 10:22 am - IP Man-Hash: 23f61237efbe9
@manvoice - Ask the average man on the street if he thinks he has power he would most likely say that he doesn’t. Not politically or socially. It is only the tiny majority of men that are in influential positions that make the decisions and those decisions are affected by the electorate and by pressure groups most of which are feminist.
Again, define power. Where exactly in the societies we live now and over the course of history do men have a ‘disproportionate large share of power’? Does a man have any power over whether or not he was drafted into the army? Does he have any power over the outcomes of the family courts today? Did men have power to choose decent employment over the dangerous jobs they did (and still do)? How about the men of lower classes in history that did all the back breaking labour of keeping the economy going, and did all fighting and dying for their country but never had a single say in the decision making of the minority of rich politicians who directed the country? Of course no women then could vote at all, but neither could the vast majority of men.
It isn’t as simple as you are making it out to be. Men never ruled over women, and they never have. It is only a handful of powerful men that ruled over all men and women. The patriarchy is a feminist invention, and in reality power is very much in the hands of a select few. Men and women alike have been powerless in the face of such a system.
October 22nd, 2007 at 10:22 am - IP Man-Hash: 23f61237efbe9
* a tiny minority of men - not a tiny majority of men
October 22nd, 2007 at 10:43 am - IP Man-Hash: f0218cf4532b7
I tend to agree with Luka here.
We men are powerless today even if society is ruled by men these mancunts are giving away our freedoms to women by design even.
The purpose is to help being in the NWO.
Women are only the pawns being used by the comunist to spread the money and take power from whiteman who are the only ones standing in the way of the NWO. Women have no idea they are being led about by their selfishness & greed. The NWO won’t be so sweet for women once the game is over. But of course they will blame men for allowing them to destroy our society.
Women suck as humans