Ask Dick: Why Do Women Hate Porn?
diamatik has sent me the following question:
Dick, why do women hate porn?
Oh boy do they ever. And what’s worse than a woman who hates porn? A woman who loves porn. That’s a man-bear trap set loose in the conjugal bedroom that you just can’t miss!
“You know what would be exciting? We should watch some porn.”
“Really?”
Guilty! Not if you want to have sex you shouldn’t! Women hate porn because men are better than women.
Porno is the driver of progress and the father of modern entertainment technology. Did you know that? I did because I’m a man and I know everything. Many years ago, when Harvard Brainiacs were busy fucking around with sending data that no one gave half a shit about all around the internet, pornographers were harnessing this brave new world to electrify porno right into your computer monitor at home for several dollars a minute.
That’s called footing the bill for the foundation of a new era. Porno did that.
When VHS tapes cost over 90 dollars to purchase, who funded the expansion of this nascent and ultimately world changing industry? I’ll give you a hint. His name started with P and ended with orno. Porno.
Here’s another hint: men love him.
The modern world is built on porn. In fact, that is one of the first things men have in common with pornography. We’re both owed a debt by women en masse for building this world they trash on a daily basis. Women are owed a thanks for nothing — or a sarcastic thank you at best.
Women hate porn because it reminds them of what they already know and what they try to forget on a daily basis: they’re bad in bed, they’re fucking lazy, and they’re not good enough for you.
Women are bad in bed. Every single porno actress in the world is great in bed. Someone paid her some amount of money and then she hopped in bed without bitching about it. That’s called being great in bed. And it’s not called being a prostitute either because let’s be honest, when was the last time a man got a free lunch? Never. So what? Half of Earth are prostitutes? You can say that. You’d be right. But then there would be no point in having the word “prostitute”. It wouldn’t describe anything that an already existing word doesn’t.
Women.
Porn actresses can also look their partner in the eye while they’re having sex. Women, who are all anti-porn, are too fucking ashamed of themselves and too emotionally stunted to do even that. Men are so emotionally mature we can have sex in front of a mirror. Even if we’re fatter than fuck.
Women are lazy. Even men who aren’t in porn look like they should be in porn. They’re fit as a fiddle with a six pack and they have confidence. Women who aren’t in porn look like they shouldn’t even be in public. Velor pantsuits that are two sizes too small, a fucked up tangled bush of hair atop their heads, regular shoes sans any sort of sequins; none of that is something I want to see when I’m walking around town. And if women did that more often (walked around town), maybe someone would grant them their ultimate fantasy and mistake them for a porn star.
The burden of being a man is that your woman is not good enough for you and she never will be. It’s a bitch, but it’s true. She isn’t good enough for you, your car isn’t good enough for you, your you isn’t good enough for you. You’re a man and you demand perfection — no, you demand better than perfection. You don’t stop until you can look right into the eyes of a porn and say, “Now that is what I’m talking about.” Women can’t do that. When women watch porn, they see the eyes of their mother staring disapprovingly at them and hear her passive aggressively demonstrating how to be a failure. Think about that when your girlfriend pops the question.
“Got any porn?”
Of course I have porn. I’m a man. What kind of retarded question is that?
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Nothing like a woman’s wisdom to throw a monkey wrench into an affair and hasten its expiry.
- Paul Oakenfold - Perfecto Fluoro - CD 1 - 06 - Teleport (Man With No Name)
Shut up. Fuck off.
-Dick
Excactly. The people that have problems with their close friends watching porn, simply has other issues. “I’m not enough for you anymore?” translates to low self-esteem, and that’s about all there is to it. No more, no less.
So you’re just reinforcing Dicks point really. This is what he wrote:
“Women hate porn because it reminds them of what they already know and what they try to forget on a daily basis: they’re bad in bed, they’re fucking lazy, and they’re not good enough for you.”
That aside, i watched porn with my ex sometimes.
Hey,
I dont care if this sight is off limits….
you wanna know why a girl hates her guy watching porn?
Its not because she personally hates it. I walked in on my
man today watching porn. He was too shocked to close down
the window quick enough (LOL) Its because like it or not
we have double standards for eachother. Yeah, he said before
I moved in with him, you won’t need your vibrator anymore
with me around. Well I chucked it out because I knew
it upset him. So I’ve given him shit about porn. Today we both had a laugh about the jealousy and foolishness of it all. I’m going to get another vibrator, I knowhe’s not going to stop watching porn.
;> *smirk* I’ve never had any complaints in the bedroom though.
and I would’nt be caught dead in sequin and velour fat pants.
Every woman should watch a pornstar give a blowjob.
“See that?? THAT FEELS GOOD!”
Porn is NOT degrading to women.. ever.
I’ve yet to see any woman in a porn been forced at gun point to accept 1000 bucks for 1 hour’s worth of work… have you?
necro is completly right, (he is a man) women hate porn stars, actresses, models, any other woman that is pretty, sexy, talented ect… you all know the drill, there threatened by other woman that have anything to offer and are blind in there hatred of them simply becuase of the competition. where as men are better than that and see that 2 minds are greater then 1, we try to help and make things easier for each other, where they just smile in your face and stab your back.
All points made above are absolutely valid.
Here’s my experience on it.
1. Women may persuade (aka trick) you to watch it with them, but God forbide you get a boner.
2. If you have sex with them while porn is on the set, they will invariably begin crying, even though it was their idea in the first place.
3. They like to watch it, if only because it gives them ideas on what turns you on. (I had a gf who found a skin mag years ago and spent the entire day with it, with me coming home to find her with the same hairstyle as a porn star, and a shaved bush!).
This site is men only, sean. Shit every man knows what you just said.
Good points regardless.
-Dick
Women’s reactions to porn are, as with most things female, a ridiculous contradiction.
First they get pissed off because it becomes obvious that they’re not the only thing capable of turning them on. Never mind that they have male movie star who gets them wet and don’t mind discussing it ad nauseum: if you get hard watching Angelina Jolie’s tits in Gaia, it’s an outrage.
The continue being pissed off, because unlike women, men really can get turned on just by pictures and videos. There’s an innate jealousy over this, because as we know, women hate sex. They hear great things about it but are generally incapable of actually enjoying it; the fact that men so easily do makes them green with envy.
Then they start thinking about what’s in the videos — which is almost certainly more unusual and interesting than anything they’ve ever provided for you. Down deep, they’d like to experience some of what’s in the videos, but they don’t want to have to admit it. They’d like you to flip them over and do what you like, but they can’t bring themselves to say so.
Then there’s this chunk of their mind that’s wondering why you don’t know what they want and just do it without them having to say it …
They worry that you’re not turned on by them any more and that maybe it’s a failing on their part that you don’t know what they want without them having to say it.
Of course, they vacillate on that one, going from, “It’s my fault he doesn’t know what I want without me having to say it,” to “If he were a more caring person, he’d know what I want without me having to say it — what a jerk he is!”
These two nutty ideas compete for attention, making her flip from shame to anger at a rate of about 120 times a minute.
They generally settle on anger. The implication that it might have something to do with them is that they’d have to do some introspection and self-examination, something no woman is really capable of. It’s easier, therefore, to sustain being pissed off at you.
I only wish I was joking about all this, but as anyone who’s been trapped by marriage knows, I’m not. This is how women actually think.
The one thing that will never occur to them is to at least apply the same standards to you as they have for themselves, i.e. it’s normal for a man to get turned on by hot women just as she’s turned on by hot men. Nor will it ever occur them to just say they want something sexually: in their nutty world, you have to read their frakking minds.
Seriously. I’m not joking. But then, we all probably knew that.
Sean, that is an excellent point.
You left out the part about how, if you are unlucky enough to fall for this trap, and begin to actually watch it with them, or even worse, have sex while watching it, they will go psycho hose-beast crazy jealous on you and never leave you alone about how you like porn better than them.
It’s fucking ridiculous. If you didn’t want me to watch it, what the fuck did you want it on for?
They are just jealous because they want to be in the porn themselves most of the time.
Women have no right to complain either. They have their dildos, men have porn.
Women are just hideously jealous that they can be easily substituted by a few pixels on a screen, or ink dots on a page. It shatters the illusion that they are irreplaceable goddesses and that we worship the ground they walk on.