Can You Teach Useless?
There are a handful of questions you can ask any woman to get her to start talking about “deep personal things”. And by the end of her monologue she’ll be in love with you. Women are like outboard motors of sex. No matter how long they’ve been sitting, you just have to give them a few good yanks in the form of “deep personal questions” and they’ll be purring like an arthritic cat in no time.
Or are women more like used cars?
Has it ever been in a wreck? Do you offer a warranty? Are these all original parts?
With women, magic question number three is, “who was your favorite or most inspirational grade school teacher?”
All women have a favorite grade school/secondary school teacher and it’s always a woman. Unless they fucked him or wanted to — in which case it’s a man. Some criteria, isn’t it? Typical. The funny thing about it is it’s not like a pot calling a kettle black or a cow calling a pig fat. A woman having a favorite teacher is like the town invalid calling his imaginary friend a Pulitzer Prize winner. What the fuck does either of you know about the Pulitzer Prize? That’s it’s good? That’s about all women know about teaching.
Women can’t teach anything. That’s why they always brag about being good nurturers and — when they’re done banging their heads against the glass ceiling, why they say a woman’s place is at home nurturing family and children. You know what nurturing means? It means adding nothing. It means taking a situation and encouraging whatever is going on to continue to go on. Nurturing means being the fucking middle manager of life, sitting on your doughy ass, and putting a signature on anything that gets done that you really had nothing to do with.
Never mind that all teachers who aren’t free (tutors, trade teachers, university professors) are male. I know women can’t teach because I have never learned anything from a female teacher except how to lose control of a classroom. Everything I’ve ever learned has been from a man, and you’re no different.
Think about it. Women as teachers are sequestered, one might even say quarantined, to the classroom. Rightfully so. I think 7 hours a day for ten to twelve years is plenty of time to learn a valuable life skill like how to properly lose control of a classroom. Men, on the other hand, teach in everything that they do. Who makes the TV programs we watch, and writes the books that anyone gives a fuck about? That would be men. Who does the things people watch and thus learn by example? That would be men as well. What woman has ever done anything that got media focus? Monika Lewinski? Princess Di? Cindy Sheehan? No. We already have plenty of examples of learning how to bitch and whine from women. We’ve all had mothers. That and I think even Sesame Street covers how not to get a DUI these days.
You can’t expect a fifth grader to waltz into an advanced physics course and pick up a lecture in stride. Even as a young man, he doesn’t have the proper experience. That’s exactly how it is with women and them opening their mouths for the purpose of imparting knowledge. Women have looked at every advancement of our species: fire, money, clothing, equality, justice, planes, trains, automobiles; with the simple attitude of, “Fuck it. I’ll learn about it later.” When she really meant, “Fuck it. I’ll fuck for it later.”
You can’t teach that. All women figure it out at 15 and then mentally retire.
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March 22nd, 2006 at 12:17 pm - IP Man-Hash: ff4e25e0df5b1
Brilliant post Dick!Simply brilliant!I couldn’t have said it better myself!
March 30th, 2006 at 7:39 am - IP Man-Hash: ddef8d61ac441
I am the exception to your simplistic theory that ‘you can get any woman to confide her deep personal secrets, and thereby fall immediately in love’ by just asking a few carefully chosen questions. Case in point: question 3 ‘Who was your favorite grade school teacher?’. That question would neither endear you to me, nor convince me that I was in love with you. The answer that question would elicit is this: Few teachers I’ve ever had in grade school, high school or college are even worth remembering. Those who weren’t overtly sadistic, rude or cruel, were simply useless nonentities. Male or female, no difference. Any success I’ve experienced in life, which is considerable, has been in spite of, not because of anything I experienced in the classroom of any teacher. So much for your smug theory. As for the comment that nothing worth a fuck has ever been written by a woman, the reams of paper and ink that have been wasted by doctors, therapists, and lay people, both male and female, in a conciliatory attempt to convince men that ’size doesn’t matter’ are the only reading material any man ever thinks is ‘worth a fuck’. What a pity that all of their attempts at confidence bolstering reassurance are in vain. Here’s a message to all of you worried little men: size DOES matter. That’s something even a fat girl could tell you. That is, if she hadn’t been conditioned all her life to believe that the male ego is sacrosanct and must never be undermined.
March 30th, 2006 at 8:32 am - IP Man-Hash: 356b2e2244d02
Margo, nowhere is your wall of text have you refuted anything that Dick said above. All you have mentioned is that your teachers were useless freaks, which is an entirely subjective opinion.
As for your “consirable success in spite of school”, again your not actually saying anything. For all we know you could be sitting on your couch, sipping cocoa, and pondering what to spend your mans money on when he next gets paid. Some women define this as “success” believe it or not. This lifestyle requires no schooling so there could be some truth in what you say.
Finally the men on this site will no doubt find it laughable that once again, a woman has to resort to “penis size” comments, in order to make a point. Congratulations on revealing your one-track mind. Next you’ll be teling us that women have no insecurities of any kind regarding their appearance, and sexual-performance. What a joke that would be, as well as the biggest fucking lie ever told.
March 30th, 2006 at 10:52 am - IP Man-Hash: f3ae1ac46a2e3
margo, I’m surprised you didn’t pull a gay joke or two out of your fat, worthless ass. Well done!
-Dick
March 30th, 2006 at 6:55 pm - IP Man-Hash: 7f33c49f56e38
Yawn!!!!……..Why is margo’s response any different than any other skank out there??
Please women….if you want to play with the big boys, please be freaking original. Otherwise you are a bore to me.
April 2nd, 2006 at 8:19 pm - IP Man-Hash: ddef8d61ac441
Maybe my parting shot was not so original. Too bad. I notice that the great Dick himself seems to lack originality at times, as evidenced by his tendency to refer to the size of a woman’s ass whenever one of them dares to speak up.
My ass, Dick, is neither fat not useless, and I don’t hate sex.
April 3rd, 2006 at 10:04 am - IP Man-Hash: 76cebfba7c181
I’m glad to see you’ve discovered paragraphs, margo.
Your previous wall of text seemed to argue two things: the primary and secondary educational systems (dominated by women) are at best useless, more likely counterproductive; and male size matters even to “fat girl[s]“.
The former is obvious (and a function of female dominance); the latter is a more-or-less accurate observation of marginal merit.
As you were the one who repeatedly brought up “size” and fat girls, I find it unsurprising that Dick focused on those issues.
For a woman, there are three ways of dealing with this site:
1. Ignore it;
2. Freak out and conform to the Laws of Women.
3. Accept that there is truth herein, and rationally discuss things.
An intelligent woman would do (1) or (3).
-wolfe