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	<title>Men Are Better Than Women, by Dick Masterson &#187; Science Says&#8230;</title>
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	<link>http://www.menarebetterthanwomen.com</link>
	<description>Are men better than women?   Yes.</description>
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		<title>Chauvinists Make More Money</title>
		<link>http://www.menarebetterthanwomen.com/chauvinists-make-more-money/</link>
		<comments>http://www.menarebetterthanwomen.com/chauvinists-make-more-money/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Wed, 15 Oct 2008 08:08:44 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Dick Masterson</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Science Says...]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.menarebetterthanwomen.com/?p=1175</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[This article also marks my appearance in the SuperFrat/Dick Masterson cross-over comic, as the world&#8217;s first Chauvinist Detective.  Check it out for more reasons why thinking that women are shit at everything is a good idea.

While on Dr. Phil, I offhandedly referred to my work as the Art of Chauvinism.  Little did I [...]]]></description>
		<wfw:commentRss>http://www.menarebetterthanwomen.com/chauvinists-make-more-money/feed/</wfw:commentRss>
		<slash:comments>332</slash:comments>
		</item>
		<item>
		<title>Women Take Candy From Strangers</title>
		<link>http://www.menarebetterthanwomen.com/women-take-candy-from-strangers/</link>
		<comments>http://www.menarebetterthanwomen.com/women-take-candy-from-strangers/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Wed, 18 Jun 2008 15:51:47 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Dick Masterson</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Science Says...]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.menarebetterthanwomen.com/?p=1027</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[The number one way to get whatever you want out of a woman is to withhold attention.
Top Three Ways to Get What You Want From a Woman
3. Be Rich or Famous
2. Insult Her
1. Withhold Attention
Is she lipping off at the mouth?  Withhold attention.
Is she a great big fat person?  Withhold some attention.
Is she [...]]]></description>
		<wfw:commentRss>http://www.menarebetterthanwomen.com/women-take-candy-from-strangers/feed/</wfw:commentRss>
		<slash:comments>157</slash:comments>
		</item>
		<item>
		<title>Fuck You, Eco-Cunts.</title>
		<link>http://www.menarebetterthanwomen.com/fuck-you-eco-cunts/</link>
		<comments>http://www.menarebetterthanwomen.com/fuck-you-eco-cunts/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Thu, 05 Jun 2008 02:35:58 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Dick Masterson</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Science Says...]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.menarebetterthanwomen.com/?p=1039</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[&#8220;9 out of 10 women say they&#8217;d rather chat up a guy who owns the latest fuel-efficient car versus the latest sports car,&#8221; says a survey brought to us by GM &#8212; a company that sells electric fucking cars.
As a man who owns a bitchin sports convertible that runs on premium, burns through tires like [...]]]></description>
		<wfw:commentRss>http://www.menarebetterthanwomen.com/fuck-you-eco-cunts/feed/</wfw:commentRss>
		<slash:comments>138</slash:comments>
		</item>
		<item>
		<title>Size Matters</title>
		<link>http://www.menarebetterthanwomen.com/size-matters/</link>
		<comments>http://www.menarebetterthanwomen.com/size-matters/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Mon, 05 May 2008 07:35:57 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Dick Masterson</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Science Says...]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.menarebetterthanwomen.com/?p=1005</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[Which of these assholes would you hire to run your company?

I&#8217;m going to explain why you chose the one you did because I like explaining obvious shit in a humorous way.  That&#8217;s why I wrote Men Are Better Than Women &#8212; on sale now.
What could be more obvious than men are better than women? [...]]]></description>
		<wfw:commentRss>http://www.menarebetterthanwomen.com/size-matters/feed/</wfw:commentRss>
		<slash:comments>133</slash:comments>
		</item>
		<item>
		<title>Happy Birthday.  I Got You A &#8216;Settle the Fuck Down&#8217;.</title>
		<link>http://www.menarebetterthanwomen.com/f-your-birthda/</link>
		<comments>http://www.menarebetterthanwomen.com/f-your-birthda/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Mon, 28 Apr 2008 04:57:54 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Dick Masterson</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Honorary Man of the Month]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Science Says...]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.menarebetterthanwomen.com/?p=994</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[Women are the only creatures on the planet dumb enough to think their birthday is an actual holiday.  Birthdays are not holidays.  Just like weddings, coffee, pets, and anniversaries that don&#8217;t end in and also are &#8220;0&#8243;; birthdays are not a big deal.
A woman once told me that I had to be nicer [...]]]></description>
		<wfw:commentRss>http://www.menarebetterthanwomen.com/f-your-birthda/feed/</wfw:commentRss>
		<slash:comments>76</slash:comments>
		</item>
		<item>
		<title>Greatness Comes in Inches</title>
		<link>http://www.menarebetterthanwomen.com/greatness-comes-in-inches/</link>
		<comments>http://www.menarebetterthanwomen.com/greatness-comes-in-inches/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Tue, 08 Apr 2008 03:44:49 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Dick Masterson</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Science Says...]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.menarebetterthanwomen.com/greatness-comes-in-inches/</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[Greatness Comes in Inches.  That&#8217;s a bit of subtle penis humor for you, but it&#8217;s also true.
Being an inch short for a roller coaster means waiting a year to try again.  Missing Hitler by an inch with your 1903 Springfield sniper rifle means your kids are playing Wolfenstein with German keyboards.  If [...]]]></description>
		<wfw:commentRss>http://www.menarebetterthanwomen.com/greatness-comes-in-inches/feed/</wfw:commentRss>
		<slash:comments>211</slash:comments>
		</item>
		<item>
		<title>You&#8217;re a Peein&#8217;</title>
		<link>http://www.menarebetterthanwomen.com/youre-a-peein/</link>
		<comments>http://www.menarebetterthanwomen.com/youre-a-peein/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Fri, 08 Feb 2008 19:37:04 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Dick Masterson</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Science Says...]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.menarebetterthanwomen.com/youre-a-peein/</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[I was at the doctor&#8217;s office a few days ago getting my hand X-rayed after punching this fuck-head in the throat during the Super Bowl, and I learned an interesting statistic.
88% of women wash their hands after using the restroom.
66% of men do the same.
Urine is sterile, fellows and gentleman.  You&#8217;re washing your hands [...]]]></description>
		<wfw:commentRss>http://www.menarebetterthanwomen.com/youre-a-peein/feed/</wfw:commentRss>
		<slash:comments>52</slash:comments>
		</item>
		<item>
		<title>Screaming At Your Wife Is Good For You</title>
		<link>http://www.menarebetterthanwomen.com/screaming-is-healthy/</link>
		<comments>http://www.menarebetterthanwomen.com/screaming-is-healthy/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Mon, 28 Jan 2008 05:05:50 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Dick Masterson</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Science Says...]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.menarebetterthanwomen.com/screaming-is-healthy/</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[Screaming at a woman is like running on a treadmill.  It&#8217;s not going to get you anywhere because women are as dense as lead shit, and it&#8217;s a loss of Man Points.
Wasting time is a loss of Man Points.
Women understand a good screaming at as much as a dog.  You could sound like [...]]]></description>
		<wfw:commentRss>http://www.menarebetterthanwomen.com/screaming-is-healthy/feed/</wfw:commentRss>
		<slash:comments>88</slash:comments>
		</item>
		<item>
		<title>Boys Turn to Tech, Girls Turn to Poundcake</title>
		<link>http://www.menarebetterthanwomen.com/boys-turn-to-tech-girls-turn-to-poundcake/</link>
		<comments>http://www.menarebetterthanwomen.com/boys-turn-to-tech-girls-turn-to-poundcake/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Wed, 09 Jan 2008 17:18:21 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Dick Masterson</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Science Says...]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.menarebetterthanwomen.com/boys-turn-to-tech-girls-turn-to-poundcake/</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[It&#8217;s long been true that unpopular young men turn to science and innovation for companionship during their awkward years.  These men are the Bill Gates and Philo T. Farnsworth&#8217;s of the world &#8212; and to a lesser extent the George Taylor&#8217;s.  In 1869, Taylor invented a steam-powered, vibrator called &#8220;The Manipulator&#8221; designed to [...]]]></description>
		<wfw:commentRss>http://www.menarebetterthanwomen.com/boys-turn-to-tech-girls-turn-to-poundcake/feed/</wfw:commentRss>
		<slash:comments>176</slash:comments>
		</item>
		<item>
		<title>The Evolution of Stupid</title>
		<link>http://www.menarebetterthanwomen.com/the-evolution-of-stupid/</link>
		<comments>http://www.menarebetterthanwomen.com/the-evolution-of-stupid/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Tue, 16 Oct 2007 21:34:19 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Dick Masterson</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Science Says...]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.menarebetterthanwomen.com/the-evolution-of-stupid/</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[Evolution is not a theory.  Evolution is a fact.
The &#8220;theory&#8221; part in the Theory of Evolution refers only to the hypothesis of biological machinations which may or may not be the cause of evolution &#8212; ie, Natural Selection and Speciation.  And the manliest of scholars have spent thousands of man-hours on exactly that [...]]]></description>
		<wfw:commentRss>http://www.menarebetterthanwomen.com/the-evolution-of-stupid/feed/</wfw:commentRss>
		<slash:comments>128</slash:comments>
		</item>
		<item>
		<title>Old Men Are Saviors, Cougars Are Gross</title>
		<link>http://www.menarebetterthanwomen.com/old-men-are-saviors-cougars-are-gross/</link>
		<comments>http://www.menarebetterthanwomen.com/old-men-are-saviors-cougars-are-gross/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Mon, 08 Oct 2007 07:33:00 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Dick Masterson</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Science Says...]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.menarebetterthanwomen.com/old-men-are-saviors-cougars-are-gross/</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[A manpiphany is a jolt of genius that starts at the balls and proceeds directly to the brain.  Whenever I experience this phenomenon, I open my mouth and speak as quickly as I can.  What comes out may offend loads of women, but fuck women.  The truth needs to be spoken.
Female anger [...]]]></description>
		<wfw:commentRss>http://www.menarebetterthanwomen.com/old-men-are-saviors-cougars-are-gross/feed/</wfw:commentRss>
		<slash:comments>236</slash:comments>
		</item>
		<item>
		<title>Science Says: Women Are Miserable</title>
		<link>http://www.menarebetterthanwomen.com/science-says-women-are-miserable/</link>
		<comments>http://www.menarebetterthanwomen.com/science-says-women-are-miserable/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Fri, 28 Sep 2007 06:12:27 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Dick Masterson</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Science Says...]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.menarebetterthanwomen.com/science-says-women-are-miserable/</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[I&#8217;ve been saying it for years.  Women are miserable.  Today, science has finally caught up with my man-brilliance.
In a survey stretching over forty years, women are found to be increasingly unhappy when compared to their smarter and better counterparts: men.  The entire disaster can be summed up in one quote from a [...]]]></description>
		<wfw:commentRss>http://www.menarebetterthanwomen.com/science-says-women-are-miserable/feed/</wfw:commentRss>
		<slash:comments>82</slash:comments>
		</item>
		<item>
		<title>Children Are Not Pinatas</title>
		<link>http://www.menarebetterthanwomen.com/children-are-not-pinatas/</link>
		<comments>http://www.menarebetterthanwomen.com/children-are-not-pinatas/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Sun, 12 Aug 2007 16:30:31 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Dick Masterson</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Dick In Your Ear]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Science Says...]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.menarebetterthanwomen.com/children-are-not-pinatas/</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[Click below to get Dick in your Ear and listen to the podcast of this article.

Child abuse is one of the most shepugnant acts of violence known to man.  It&#8217;s wrong for the same reason it&#8217;s wrong to beat up crippled people.  They can&#8217;t fight back.  That&#8217;s also why it&#8217;s wrong for [...]]]></description>
		<wfw:commentRss>http://www.menarebetterthanwomen.com/children-are-not-pinatas/feed/</wfw:commentRss>
		<slash:comments>169</slash:comments>
		</item>
		<item>
		<title>Vaginas Might Be Causing Global Warming</title>
		<link>http://www.menarebetterthanwomen.com/vaginas-might-be-causing-global-warming/</link>
		<comments>http://www.menarebetterthanwomen.com/vaginas-might-be-causing-global-warming/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Mon, 07 May 2007 09:33:23 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Dick Masterson</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Science Says...]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.menarebetterthanwomen.com/vaginas-might-be-causing-global-warming/</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[Does science know for certain that women&#8217;s vaginas aren&#8217;t causing global warming?
I doubt it.
Think about it.  Women&#8217;s vaginas smell ridiculous.  That&#8217;s gotta be bad for the environment somehow.  Until I read a study saying otherwise, that&#8217;s what I&#8217;m going with.  It&#8217;s common sense.
Sleeping in a freshly painted closet is bad for [...]]]></description>
		<wfw:commentRss>http://www.menarebetterthanwomen.com/vaginas-might-be-causing-global-warming/feed/</wfw:commentRss>
		<slash:comments>127</slash:comments>
		</item>
		<item>
		<title>How Is a &#8220;Lesbian&#8221; Like A Walrus?</title>
		<link>http://www.menarebetterthanwomen.com/how-is-a-lesbian-like-a-walrus/</link>
		<comments>http://www.menarebetterthanwomen.com/how-is-a-lesbian-like-a-walrus/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Tue, 01 May 2007 22:35:00 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Dick Masterson</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Science Says...]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.menarebetterthanwomen.com/how-is-a-lesbian-like-a-walrus/</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[They&#8217;re both fat as shit.
I was just talking to a lady on the subject of lesbians and how their bodies look strange and Grimace-like, when I received a scientific study from a reader about the very same topic.
Scientifically speaking, men are better than women at being gay; and that means staying in a shape that [...]]]></description>
		<wfw:commentRss>http://www.menarebetterthanwomen.com/how-is-a-lesbian-like-a-walrus/feed/</wfw:commentRss>
		<slash:comments>72</slash:comments>
		</item>
		<item>
		<title>MADD Can Go And Fuck Themselves</title>
		<link>http://www.menarebetterthanwomen.com/madd-can-go-and-fuck-themselves/</link>
		<comments>http://www.menarebetterthanwomen.com/madd-can-go-and-fuck-themselves/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Wed, 25 Apr 2007 05:03:43 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Dick Masterson</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Honorary Man of the Month]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Science Says...]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.menarebetterthanwomen.com/madd-can-go-and-fuck-themselves/</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[There&#8217;s nothing I love sticking to women more than a big slab of science.
Well almost nothing.
It&#8217;s every man&#8217;s dream to lead everything he does with a joke about his penis.  Don&#8217;t be afraid to dream.  It&#8217;s your birthright as a man.
Also, don&#8217;t be afraid to drink.  As a man, drinking is not [...]]]></description>
		<wfw:commentRss>http://www.menarebetterthanwomen.com/madd-can-go-and-fuck-themselves/feed/</wfw:commentRss>
		<slash:comments>68</slash:comments>
		</item>
		<item>
		<title>Fuck Women&#8217;s Sports: Part Fucking Two</title>
		<link>http://www.menarebetterthanwomen.com/fuck-womens-sports-part-fucking-two/</link>
		<comments>http://www.menarebetterthanwomen.com/fuck-womens-sports-part-fucking-two/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Mon, 16 Apr 2007 07:01:29 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Dick Masterson</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Science Says...]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.menarebetterthanwomen.com/fuck-womens-sports-part-fucking-two/</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[When a child grabs a hot plate or runs face first into a door, it&#8217;s your responsibility as an adult to tell them not to do such things.  That&#8217;s why I&#8217;ve been telling women not to play sports for as long as I can remember.  Not because watching women play sports is embarrassing [...]]]></description>
		<wfw:commentRss>http://www.menarebetterthanwomen.com/fuck-womens-sports-part-fucking-two/feed/</wfw:commentRss>
		<slash:comments>53</slash:comments>
		</item>
		<item>
		<title>Women: Not As Dumb As They Act</title>
		<link>http://www.menarebetterthanwomen.com/women-hate-female-bosses/</link>
		<comments>http://www.menarebetterthanwomen.com/women-hate-female-bosses/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Wed, 07 Mar 2007 07:01:19 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Dick Masterson</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Science Says...]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.menarebetterthanwomen.com/women-in-the-workplace-are-not-as-dumb-as-they-act/</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[There&#8217;s nothing I like to see more than women proving men are better than women.  It&#8217;s such a joy because women do it with the same level of class, tact, and subtlety they use in everything: not a goddamn bit.
The ultimate question was put to women recently: would you rather work for a man [...]]]></description>
		<wfw:commentRss>http://www.menarebetterthanwomen.com/women-hate-female-bosses/feed/</wfw:commentRss>
		<slash:comments>60</slash:comments>
		</item>
		<item>
		<title>Women Caused the War in Iraq</title>
		<link>http://www.menarebetterthanwomen.com/women-caused-the-war-in-iraq/</link>
		<comments>http://www.menarebetterthanwomen.com/women-caused-the-war-in-iraq/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Mon, 05 Mar 2007 07:01:42 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Dick Masterson</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Science Says...]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.menarebetterthanwomen.com/women-caused-the-war-in-iraq/</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[Women caused the war in Iraq.  It&#8217;s been plain as day to me for a while now &#8212; because of my mantuition, but I didn&#8217;t want to drop that particular bomb up the ass of feminism because I hadn&#8217;t yet acquired the proof.
Someone call the CO.  The proof has been acquired.
Just like all [...]]]></description>
		<wfw:commentRss>http://www.menarebetterthanwomen.com/women-caused-the-war-in-iraq/feed/</wfw:commentRss>
		<slash:comments>241</slash:comments>
		</item>
		<item>
		<title>Double and a Half Jeopardy</title>
		<link>http://www.menarebetterthanwomen.com/double-and-a-half-jeopardy/</link>
		<comments>http://www.menarebetterthanwomen.com/double-and-a-half-jeopardy/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Fri, 02 Mar 2007 07:01:48 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Dick Masterson</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Science Says...]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.menarebetterthanwomen.com/double-and-a-half-jeopardy/</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[I watched an episode of Jeopardy tonight and saw a woman completely embarrass herself in a national way with her womanly stupidity.
Typical.  She didn&#8217;t even make it to Final Jeopardy because she fucked up all her money.  What the hell kind of a way to play Jeopardy is that?  Jesus.
I felt bad [...]]]></description>
		<wfw:commentRss>http://www.menarebetterthanwomen.com/double-and-a-half-jeopardy/feed/</wfw:commentRss>
		<slash:comments>45</slash:comments>
		</item>
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