Call Dick!
I enjoy each and every one of the countless manpliments and words of mancouragement that I receive from my man-readers. However, reading and writing are womanly things. Go to a bookstore and see for yourself if you want proof.
Bam! That’s your proof right there. As a man, you haven’t been to a bookstore in so long that you don’t even know what I’m talking about. The bookstore is full of books for women! The whole goddamn industry is lousy with them.
To that end, I’ve acquired a phone number for men to call to offer their words of wisdom on top of whatever I’ve said — to spare them the womanliness of writing me an email or leaving me a written comment. Feel free to call and add anything you want to the conversation. All voice mails are being recorded and will be compiled into a podcast for the site.
No women are allowed to call.
(213) 985 DICK
(213) 985 3425
-Dick
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I so wish I could say all men were competent.
My brother just ran up the stairs yelling “Dur, dur, dur!!!!”
Also, this made me laugh. Since I AM a woman and I read your book “Men are better than women.” I thought literature was for women? Though I do admit it was a comical read, it pissed my mom off so I had to explain to her that it was most likely a joke. <.<;;; Whilst you laugh about my lame attempt at trying to make it look like you contradicted yourself, I’ll go do something like…. I don’t know…. think about why the splotches on my ceiling look like potatoes.
Anyone else find it funny that every single comment with an obviously fake name is hateful? Women, stick to books. Men invented the internet.
I find it hilarious that you try to prevent women from not commenting, sending hate mail, and calling you a filthy attention whore.
That’s what you and all your chauvanist followers are doing, really. All you’re trying to do is get attention. Please, give it a rest, nobody honestly cares about you or your opinions against women.
“That’s what you and all your chauvanist followers are doing, really. All you’re trying to do is get attention. Please, give it a rest, nobody honestly cares about you or your opinions against women.”
We don’t go to feminist sites and start threatening physical violence towards them, yet they flock here to post their idiotic drivel and death threats.
Perhaps you can explain this disparity?
You deserve a god damned man-church in your name, you are a God among men.
one thing that i realized from listening to some of the pissed of men callers because they were probably nagged to death to make the call
by th eway iam proud of my mom she gave me life gave me a nice look too so i would charm your mother too not like you you looser ,, so dont call dick call me so ill give u lessons ..
Everybody loves their moms you asshole.”gave me a nice look too” what the fuck is that supposed to mean?Did your mother dress you up in pink frocks and put makeup in your face?There’s no fucking way you are a man.Fuck off, biotch!!
hahah i love it RB ….real love is probably a woman or a silly guy who has been mentally castrated by his mother…i LOVE THIS WEBSITE!!
@Robash Thank you and welcome to the site.
What lessons you want to give us?
as u mentioned my mom is a whore, i would like your mother and i can take her out by just if she saw my car or from one look from me, so by the time ur commenting here iam sure ur mom is fucking someone , if shes not really fucking she would be fucking him in her mind, so i can see how u were born now …mmmmmm hmmmm .. ur rude mother fucker came to life by ur mom fucken fault…… maybe ull meet ur dad on here n this site ….. yeahhhhhhh..wow
:)
you’re a cunt, your mother is single cause she is a whore, you are an arrogant twat, I hope you die. Your perception of women is derived from growing up around your mother.
Why so hostile?
Even married mothers are whores. 99% of women are whores, and they have made marriage their prostitution institution. Whoreness is innate in them.
hey studioline , iam a man so smile now and imagine me how i look cose thats what you are doing now , but u cant suck my dick because i like women , you fucken gay …
You are woman.That much is obvious.Now get the FUCK off.And shove this up your ass……….
(
>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>
(
First they come here and right after ther they sey something dumb, like hey Studioline,, Im a man…” yea right,lol, nice try, keep dreaming:
(
>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>
(
hey assewhole studioline ,stupid brain , if you noticed iam a man not a gay like you, so read what i wrote again and then say ur stupid comments because as i read ur comments is far away from what i wrote so i know now that you are all fucken stupid in here and its just dont desrve even to write and discuss you because you are like a computer which is programed on one way and cant have a brain to realize things and feel and have feelings, go have a cigarete assewhole and dream……..
Hippy simpleton.
iam a man, well nothing , no comments . but one thing you are all men in here fucken stupid loosers and sick people and loosers and just concentrate on word LOOSERS who noone notice you at all in life i think everyone in here is hiding and is very far from enjoying life and he’s desperate, JUST WHO THE FUCK CARES IF MAN BETTER THAN WOMEN OR NOT, JUST ENJOY LIFE AND WOMEN ALSO AND JUST LIVE UR LIFE GOOD AND BE INTELLIGENT. AND WHO CARES ABOUT IF MEN BETTER THAN WOMEN I RATHER GO OUT WITH A WOMEN AND FUCK HER AND ENJOY EVERY WOMEN ON EARTH AND WHO CARES, AND SHE ENJOYS AS WELL , AND I LIKE WOMEN VERY MUCH AND WHO DONT LIKE THEM IS A FUCKEN LIER , AND WHO CARES IF MAN BETTER THAN WOMEN IF YOU CAN ENJOY THEM AND LOVE THEM ,
SO AHAHHAHAHAHHAHAHAH UR ALL FUNNY
hey hun, real love, that’s why this site had to emerge because, without men saying “NO” to your whimmin bs, all you women have acheved for the past decades is become as stupid as you are right there in your comment.
And by the way, the reason why you so frustrated that there is no man around to fuck you is not a men’s fault. It’s whimmin’s fault, so after they have screved your brain you have everything backwords, that’s why no man is willing to fuck you.
Hippy wank-face.
MAN JOKES —
How do you turn a fox into an elephant?
Marry It!
What is the difference between a battery and a woman?
A battery has a positive side.
What are the three fastest means of communication?
1) Internet
2) Telephone
3) Telawoman
How are fat girls and mopeds alike?
They’re both fun to ride until your friends find out.
What should you give a woman who has everything?
A man to show her how to work it.
Why is the space between a woman’s breasts and her hips called a
waist?
Because you could easily fit another pair of tits in there.
How do you make 5 pounds of fat look good?
Put a nipple on it.
Why do women rub their eyes when they wake up?
Because they don’t have balls to scratch.
Why did God create woman ?
To carry semen from the bedroom to the toilet.
Why do women fake orgasms ?
Because they think men care.
What do you say to a woman with 2 black eyes?
Nothing, she’s been told twice already.
If your wife keeps coming out of the kitchen to nag at you, what have
you done wrong?
Made her chain too long
How many men does it take to open a beer?
None. It should be opened when she brings it.
Why is a Laundromat a really bad place to pick up a woman?
Because a woman who can’t even afford a washing machine will probably
never be able to support you.
Why do women have smaller feet than men?
It’s one of those ‘evolutionary things’ that allows them to stand
closer to the kitchen sink.
How do you know when a woman is about to say something smart?
When she starts a sentence with ‘A man once told me..’
How do you fix a woman’s watch?
You don’t. There is a clock on the oven.
Why do men pass gas more than women?
Because women can’t shut up long enough to build up the required
pressure.
If your dog is barking at the back door and your wife is yelling at
the front door, who do you let in first?
The dog, he’ll shut up once you let him in.
What’s worse than a Male Chauvinist Pig?
A woman who won’t do what she’s told
I married a Miss Right.
I just didn’t know her first name was Always.
Scientists have discovered a food that diminishes a woman’s sex drive
by 90%..
It’s called a Wedding Cake.
Why do men die before their wives?
They want to.
#10 - You can trade an old .44 for two new .22s.
#9 - You can keep one handgun at home and have another for when you’re on the road.
#8 - If you admire a friend’s handgun, and tell him so, he will probably let you try it out a few times.
#7 - Your primary handgun doesn’t mind if you have a backup.
#6 - Your handgun will stay with you even if you’re out of ammo.
#5 - A handgun doesn’t take up a lot of closet space.
#4 - Handguns function normally every day of the month.
#3 - A handgun doesn’t ask “Do these new grips make me look fat?”
#2 - A handgun doesn’t mind if you go to sleep after you use it.
AND THE NUMBER ONE WAY THAT A HANDGUN IS BETTER THAN A WOMAN . . .
You can buy a silencer for a handgun.
UR DOIN IT RONG GUIZ.
EVERYBODY is stupid. Everybody.
Except for Tom Cruise, because our lord and saviour L. Ron Hubbard said so.
Right….. Jumping up and down on the furniture and making a complete ass out yourself on National Television is something everyone aspires to.
Lucky for Tom women buy into that shit by the millions.
FREE KATIE!
Listen, YOU don’t know psychiatry. TOM DOES.
Stop being so GLIB. You are GLIB, sir.
LMAO!
Yeah I saw that interview too.
Hilarious.
You confused “psychiatry” with “butt sex”.
Actually, Tom’s views on psychiatry are quite accurate:
PSB (Pseudo Scientific Bullshit)
Hey where can I go to listen to the calls people send in? I cant seem to find a link to any podcasts or anything!
go to youtube and search MABTW in the search bar.
Cmon man, you should be able to figure this shit out, youtube has it all.
Admit it, guys…without women on this site, it wouldn’t be as much entertaining! XD
A nice point indeed. If I couldn’t come here for a good debate, half of my reason for popping in would be gone.
lol, yeah, me too XD
Too bad the list of debates that didn’t feel one-sided is nearly non-existant.
joe go and use the dishwasher bitch ha ha
Keep it cumming. Let go of your anger. I can feel the hate swelling in you now. With each pulsing moment…. you make yourself more my servant. Come on you cunt, show everyone just how repulsive your behavior is. I will break you down to surrending and sucking my cock…. just like “Lucy”.
“There is nothing more liberating and freeing to a woman… than chauvenism.”
Menarebetterthanwomen.
Hello sun of a bitch,you know who you are ! Yes go and fuck yourself with a big pole and shove it up dicks arse, he will enjoy it have fun !
If there’s one thing I know, you’ll be fun!
Such anger, such emotion - what gives, princess?
im no princess sweet im far from that i just like to express my self it does get me in to trouble not as much as my anger lol i will never get through to dick of course or most of the men on this site i have tried beleive me so now i have fun every one is entitled to that and to release there anger i no that by studying this website for a long time you understand
Who told you this website exists so that “you can release your anger”? Put the dick DOWN crack-baby and pay attention.
You’re not even fuckin’ allowed to read, comment, post call or think any man gives a flying fuck about you here.
This website is a HILARIOUS example of how MEN REALLY ARE better than women, and cunts like you go out of your way to get so fucking pissed off to prove it everyday.
Why don’t you just get fucked instead? When I want to “release my anger” I throat fuck and spank a whore into submission until the mascara is running down her face from the effort.
There’s one on every street corner, library, starbucks in the country.
You may want to re-evaluate exactly what it is you’re doing here. Because one thing is for fucking sure…. throating a man load of hot jizz is making yourself a hell of a lot more useful than being here.
Count on it.
Menarebetterthanwomen.
“im no princess sweet im far from that i just like to express my self it does get me in to trouble not as much as my anger lol i will never get through to dick of course or most of the men on this site i have tried beleive me so now i have fun every one is entitled to that and to release there anger i no that by studying this website for a long time you understand”
It’s easy to tell that a woman wrote the above text. If a man had written it, it would be in clear concise sentences that are easy to understand. It would also contain proper punctuation, as well as correct usage of capital letters in words like “I’m” and proper names like “Dick”. Would it kill you broads to use a fucking period once in a while? Seriously, it’s not that hard. It’s right there, between the comma and slash keys. Communication skills are just one more thing that men are better at than women.
Oh, wow. Can I please tell you something? For one, not all women are the same, obviously! Yeah, this site isn’t for women, but oh well. I really don’t understand…are you womenhaters gay? Because you absolutely hate women. Which I’m sure most of you don’t, you all can’t be that bad. Do you notice my punctuation? Yeah, I’m a writer, which proves that all women are not the same when it comes to spelling. You guys all need a reality check.
Haha, go Michelle! >.<
Firstly, maybe people taking it to the extreme have said it, but neither Dick nor alot of people state they hate ALL woman. Secondly, assuming we’re gay proves what little mass of intelligence you carry. People don’t “hate” woman, woman need to stop viewing it that way. We are “better”, believe it or not, that’s different. You speak like if we favor something, we obviously hate the rest. I listen to alot of music, but there are some songs that are my favorite. Just because it’s my favorite doesn’t mean I would perfer something else in a different mood. Just because men are better doesn’t mean we are gay.
Men are better than woman
MICHELLE: “Oh, wow. Can I please tell you something?”
MEN: “No women allowed. Learn to read, or learn to respect a man’s boundaries . . . or prepare to be raped because you asked for it.”
•••
MICHELLE: “For one, not all women are the same, obviously! ”
MEN: “Prove it. Wassamatter? CAN’T you?”
•••
MICHELLE: “Yeah, this site isn’t for women, but oh well.”
MEN: “Yeah your pussy and asshole is yours, but oh well.”
•••
MICHELLE: “Are you womenhaters gay?”
MEN: “You don’t have to LIKE a woman to fuck her. You know that, right?? If men waited around for women we ‘LIKED’, we would never have sex. If you want to know if we are really gay, why don’t you take out your tits, drop to your knees and tell my cock and balls how gay I am. You’ll get a definitive answer.”
•••
MICHELLE: “Do you notice my punctuation ? . . . . which proves that all women are not the same when it comes to spelling”
MEN: “Wrong. All women are the same when it comes to spelling. They expect SPECIAL credit , recognition and a fucking award for being able to spell.”
Aim higher.
Menarebetterthanwomen.
Well, they certainly act like they hate all women, considering the fact that ALL women are whores -_-
MICHELLE: “Yeah, this site isn’t for women, but oh well.”
MEN: “Yeah your pussy and asshole is yours, but oh well.”
LLLLLLLLMMMMMMMAAAAAAAAOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!
Wow. It really was that funny.
Chris, to be blunt, it’s out of line to say all women are the same. Like a sterotype, you expect a jock to play sports, and 1 out of every 100 people classified that way it isn’t so. Same with woman, the majority are pitiless assholes, but that doesn’t mean you can bunch ALL of them together.
Secondly to John, I state again, I don’t believe the whore thing, but even then, being a whore and being a hated are STILL different. One of my friends is a dumb ass who sets shit on fire and steals from Wal-Mart. Do I hate him? No. He was inproperly taught and still my friend.
Thank you!! Please punch that into his brain. He doesn’t really seem to understand that. ^_^
*Sigh* It’s a pleasure actually, John. The number of retarded, loud and illogical woman here is disturbing, but I won’t deny that the amount of stupidity on the mens side is even more disuturbing, even if I think there is much less of it.
@MAXWELL
That’s a very astute observation. BUT! you’ll notice I didn’t say “ALL women are the same”.
I merely ASK women to SHOW that they are not all the same.
When you REALLY pay attention, you’ll notice that every woman is VERY interested in shouting from the rooftops - AND LOUDLY IN YOUR FACE!!!! - that not all women are the same.
And that’s exactly where the lazy cunts STOP.
• “We are not all bitches and cunts!!!!! ……. You fucking assholes burn in hell you bastards!!!!!”
• “Women are totally smart!!!!!….. OMG LOLZ U R ALL FAGZ”
It’s not up to MEN to think “not all women are the same”.
—>>> It’s up to the WOMEN.
@Chris
So then you’re not going to give them a chance before you open your mouth? Day 1: Show SOME respect. Day 2: They most likely prove you right, THEN you call them a cunt. Innocient until proven guilty right?
But you’re a Dick fan, right Chris? You SHOULD be saying that all women are the same: lying, cheating, angry all the time. You’d be totally wrong, but you know, whatever. It’s whatever you believe in, I guess
MEN: “No women allowed. Learn to read, or learn to respect a man’s boundaries . . . or prepare to be raped because you asked for it.”
Wow, Chris…hmm if I get raped, I’m asking for it? How mature is that. That’s all this is, imaturity. And no, I don’t want some type of award for spelling. I’m just telling you something. Some of the men are on here saying women can’t spell…so, I’m proving you and SOME of your little buddies wrong. Its good to see that not all men on here hate women. I only imagine how your mother must feel, Chris. Or, she probably doesn’t know about your little act on this website. I bet you’re nothing like some of the men on here, just putting up a little show for your friends. But if you’re serious, then congrats on being a dick.
@John. Pretty much, that’s why I’m here, because of my beliefs. Yes, I’m a Dick fan and I agree with alot of what he says, but not all of it and there are too many untied ends, so if those can be tied, maybe people would understand the fact of Dick as well as his self-opinons and over exaggerations. Reasonable enough reason to be here, no? ^^
Dogs really ARE “a man’s best friend”.
Put your girlfriend and your Dog in the trunk of your car (or just tell her you don’t want her around right now)….. after one hour….. WHO WILL BE HAPPY TO SEE YOU?
EVERYONE knows the answer to that one.
THEREFORE –>> ALL WOMEN ARE CUNTS.
@ Maxwell
Yeah, I can understand that. I mean, it just bugs me that he thinks women are so DUMB- I mean, of course, some of them are. But not the majority of them, I don’t think. And you’re right, there are a lot of untied ends. I think he just goes off based on his opinion rather than actual facts most of the time. Sometimes he actually has proof to back it up.
And as for you, Chris…there’s a reason as to why the dog would be happier. HE WOULDN’T KNOW WHAT THE FUCK WAS GOING ON. A woman would. Therefore, she’s smart enough to know what an asshole you are for locking her in the trunk. PWN! XD
@MICHELLE
• “I’m proving you and SOME of your little buddies wrong.”
That’s just ONE example where men are clearly better than women. We don’t ever feel the need to seek your approval or “prove” oursleves to women.
Women only THINK real Men are interested in that.
It’s one of the most fascinating things about women that they THEMSELVES don’t understand.
•••
I don’t “hate” women. Who told you that??? I would NEVER want to throw my dick into something I “hate”. That’s a fucking guarantee.
Don’t take it all so personally.
It’s not about YOU.
Can’t you cunts get that??
“Menarebetterthanwomen” is not about YOU.
It’s about how Men are BETTER than you.
@John
What I think EVERYONE needs to realize is that some is fact, and some is his opinon. In my self-belief, I support alot of his opinon. In my belief, I do think that the majority of woman are dumb rather than some, but weither it’s some or a majority, that’s not all of them. People need to stay on there rocker I believe in the end; woman making stupid posts at Dick and men making stupid posts at the woman who are at least holding a logical conversation. That’s probably why I won’t be an ass to woman but still hold this belief. Again, it’s not all, so why make it that anyways? It just makes no since.
@John-its good to see that not all men on here think the same way
Yeah, I like your way of thinking. It is getting a little tiring… women want to state their opinions, and men just bash it down with no remorse. And it makes me mad that women do the same to the guys, I mean, it’s funny at first, but it does get a bit old. XD
Yeah. I hope Chris gets it by now, now that an actual MAN has proven that not all women are the same. ^_^
@JOHN
————————–
“Chris…there’s a reason as to why the dog would be happier. HE WOULDN’T KNOW WHAT THE FUCK WAS GOING ON. A woman would. Therefore, she’s smart enough to know what an asshole you are for locking her in the trunk”.
————————–
And there is the Prime example of an ENTITLED AMERICAN CUNT right there.
Thank you for making the point perfectly.
Pay attention and learn something you stupid cunt….
—– “Put your girlfriend and your Dog in the trunk of your car (or just tell her you don’t want her around right now)….. after one hour….. WHO WILL BE HAPPY TO SEE YOU? ——
What’s really going is simply THAT THE GUY JUST DOESNT WANT HER AROUND RIGHT NOW.
Kinda like —>> NOONE WANTS YOU AROUND RIGHT NOW EITHER.
Are you getting it now???
But whimmin will HATE THAT SO MUCH and take it SO personally that a man has no choice but to have more respect for a DOG.
She isn’t even able to accept that a guy just doesn’t want her around right now…. and she will BLAME HIM FOR IT —>> INSTEAD OF HERSELF.
Fascinating.
Menarebetterthanwomen.
Well, it’s his fault for locking her in the trunk, right? All he had to do was go away for a little while instead of being in the same house with her. Locking her in a trunk would be…how shall I put this?…RETARDED.
And no, we don’t hate that. In fact, we can relate to that…sometimes, we don’t even want to be around guys. So please, learn a little- and for the love of John Petrucci, STOP OVERUSING THE WORD “CUNT”!!! It’s getting on my last noive. lol
Chris - absolutely 100% true. Tell a woman you just don’t want her around right now… and she (like Michelle said) will think it’s because “you’re an asshole”.
When that is NOT “what’s going on right now”.
What’s going on right now - is entitled arrogant American Cunts who think all men must want them around all the time.
That’s what’s wrong with women.
Even men and DOGS don’t think that.
@Chris
I believe John had a bit better reasoning. Maybe if you didn’t mix insults with a point you’d get somewhere. Please, please, make a LOGICAL point, or join the stupid majority because even I didn’t understand you.
Now that I understand what Chris said means, it really makes me wonder why he didn’t say it like Mark did.
@JOHN
Jesus Fucking Christ you’re a stupid cunt.
—- “Well, it’s his fault for locking her in the trunk, right? All he had to do was go away for a little while instead of being in the same house with her” —–
WRONG.
HE WANTS –>> **YOU** TO GO AWAY.
Pay attention!
JUST LIKE ALL MEN HERE WANT YOU TO GO AWAY.
How much of a fucking DUMB CUNT ARE YOU????
Men don’t want to get rid of you for no reason. Its YOUR FAULT that a man would want to throw you in the trunk of his car….. or stick you in another room and shut the fucking door behind him.
its YOUR FAULT that men dump you. Its YOUR PROBLEM if a guy doesn’t want to call you again. NOT HIS. He is not REQUIRED TO want to spend time with you.
When will you dumb cunts GET THAT????
LMAO at Maxwell
It’s because he can’t go through a sentence without refraining from the word “cunt” -_-
…sure tell a women you don’t want her around. But, don’t say ‘cunt’ or ‘whore’ to her…words like that. I’m sure you guys were raised to respect females. I just think its wrong to call them all of that. Yes, you can say men are better than women, and leave it as that. State your facts why you think so…but without all the extra stuff.
*Sigh* Chris….
It’s VERY much his fault for locking his gf in a trunk. HELLO?! That’s retarded!
And for real, you make men sound lazy as fuck. And I know some of them out there aren’t. If they really didn’t want to be around a woman, they would get the fuck away from them. Not wait for them to leave, because that wouldn’t happen at the time he’s expecting them to leave. It might, but fat chance.
And it’s really not ALWAYS the woman’s fault for getting dumped by a guy. If a guy dates a girl just to have sex with her, and she says no, the guy will dump her because he only cares about her in bed. Thus, it’s his fault for breaking up with her, not hers.
That’s the “Automatically Entitled American Cunt”
They are so fucking stupid, they are not even CAPABLE of imagining that a man just does not want her there.
Simply Un-fucking-believable.
@ Mark…
…???
@MICHELLE
WRONG.
A man can SAY - and THINK - and DO whatever, whoever and whenever he wants. Don’t ever talk to man like he needs - or is interested in - YOUR permission . . . . for anything.
MEN CAN BANG ANY PUSSY WE WANT.
AND MEN WILL NEVER APOLOGIZE FOR IT.
No man cares whether or not “you think it’s wrong”.
Its not a man’s role in life to seek your approval.
Think about it.
Once again, Mark…not all women are the same. Can you state something without using ‘cunt’? Chris…Mark?
Ha! But see, that’s where you’re wrong, my friend. There ARE men who want to seek approval from women. Those men are the ones that actually RESPECT a woman and LOVE them.
And I’m guessing you’re a huge fan of rape? Considering the fact that you said that men can bang any pussy they want? Which, I’m only guessing here, also includes without the woman’s approval.
John_Petrucci -