Dick’s Voice Mail #2
I received over a thousand voice mails in the last five days, and I will be posting them all week.
Next week’s topic: what is the stupidest thing you’ve ever seen a woman do. Call in and tell me.
Related Articles:
Classic Dick
Random Dick
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April 14th, 2008 at 1:44 am - IP Man-Hash: 4b8494f25ae28
Never heard anything like it; quality and educational entertainment.
April 14th, 2008 at 2:01 am - IP Man-Hash: 4b8494f25ae28
I’ll add that, above all else, I think manholes choose to be stupid. Sure, there may be some societal relations, but above their pampered childhood, their pathetic character, they just want to be a dumb fuck.
I just can’t comprehend any other way. How is it that a manhole could be so stupid when she has no ‘diagnosable’ neurological illness and she is an ‘academic’ achiever?
She’s SOL if she wants to become a productive member of society now, but I think their poor life decisions would be more stinging to them than any manufactured ‘daddy moments’ or ‘almost-raped experiences.’ No, the guilt is nothing to them, it’s the knowledge that they had every single thing going for them - a fucking society that crowns mediocrity as superiority - and they still were too fucking lazy to make anything of it. No, they’re content to run their hair dryers and stumble around their mini-malls.
It amazes me still how irrelevant ’status’ is to society. The cab driver, Alberta man, etc. were each brilliant in his own way. I couldn’t elevate one over the other in that bullshit feminist-superior scale, and I mean, who gives a shit?
They’re both brilliant people. In short, very inspiring and well fucking done; I have what a Valley Girl would call ‘nerd work’ to do. I can’t fucking believe that I actually felt like a loser for wanting to not be a dumbshit.
Heh, society is so fucked up now. You get more status living off of welfare than you do as a shoe shiner or something. There’s a chart of that somewhere.
Above:
Rambling post; best read between droughts of cough syrup and rubbing alcohol. Yeah, those are the fucking chick drinks now; for little teenage sociopaths who think the justice system is a god-damn revolving door.
April 14th, 2008 at 2:46 am - IP Man-Hash: d0c43bae1ac42
Don calling from the frozen wastelands of Alberta (Manville):
“Thats one fucking thing men do better than men and thats drilling for oil to provide the energy needs for all those fucking hair dryers and shopping malls that women stumble around in”.
Priceless! Fuck women.
April 14th, 2008 at 3:00 am - IP Man-Hash: 921c38c0d8c30
Man, this call in thing was one of the best ideas ever! Always hilarious to listen to.
April 14th, 2008 at 3:39 am - IP Man-Hash: d0c43bae1ac42
*Typo*
Don calling from the frozen wastelands of Alberta (Manville):
“Thats one fucking thing men do better than women and thats drilling for oil to provide the energy needs for all those fucking hair dryers and shopping malls that women stumble around in”.
Priceless! Fuck women
April 14th, 2008 at 4:51 am - IP Man-Hash: 1b4cb6a9b1d55
Sweet Jesus H. Christ!!!!… Love your work Dr. Masterson, truly blinded by the brilliance and humbly grateful for the insight. Just in case that poor “disabled” man is listening or “reading” I wanted to extend my heartfelt condolences to him for the obvious misery he must experience on a daily basis. I couldn’t imagine the horror of being locked up with that rabid, foaming-at-the-mouth ferret that wipes his ass and feeds him. Can you possibly imagine the humiliation of having to not only have your ass wiped by another person but to then have to be reminded about how grateful you should be for the “services”…..Sweet Jesus H. Christ if I were disabled and had to be locked up with that maggot I would be reaching for the rusty sardine can so I could hack my wrists open and escape the misery…..fuck!!!…I hope the poor bastard isn’t quadreplegic……keep up the good work Dr. Masterson. (BTW…..I absolutely love the soothing background piano work….has me reaching for a large scotch and a cigar)
April 14th, 2008 at 4:52 am - IP Man-Hash: 1d09a20ae5ff2
To Dick and all men
It is obvious that men’s achievements surpass women’s.
So how come women have managed to enslave us, at least for last decades. If we are so smart, so how come that happened and women just take what we have, all of it? What’s the point in going to the moon, or conquering the universe if we stay being slaves?
It’s because women are better than man in one thing. They were not afraid, to take a stand. So what are we afraid of? That we wont get pussy? Women also want Dick even more that we want pussy. Even lesbians can’t do it without a dick. But they were able to withhold theirs itching as long as it took to take a stand.
At some point we also have to take a stand. Dick Masters showed us it is possible. He went to TV show and spoke for us. And you know what? He is still alive. The only thing that happened was that women found out, that there is a man, who is not happy with being a women’s slave. But we are all unhappy, so why can’t we take a stand. Dick Masterson could take a stand. Women some time ago could take a stand. We man could go to the moon, but, as yet we couldn’t take a stand?
I m asking What the f… is that?
But more over I know that You too are asking What the f… is that.
Are we going to just keep asking, or are we going to do something about it? We men?
Can you imagine things getting even worse than what they are now? I know I can’t and I know you can’t too. So what are we waiting for???
Man are better in organizing things? So why don’t we organize and stand up. Not just Dick Masterson but we all men as a group.
The time is now.
So why don’t we first start, by asking Dick to create a topic on this site, and write down ideas how we are going to do this. Then chose one idea and stick to it. Dick Masterson would be deciding which idea.
For example I remember what once my ex gf told me; If men stop chasing girls for a month, girls would start chasing men, because, that is how much they like it. This are her words, to show you guys how simple this can be.
Then we need to see how many of us are together, and make it an official. For example one million men in USA let’s say Dick Masterson group, announce, they wont chase women for entire January of 2009.
Can we at least do that or something like this, so before when we die we can look back and say I did something and I’m not dying as a slave. Many men before us who many times gave their life for a right cause, showed us, that Men are who they are, because they are able to act, instead of just flapping their mouth, like bitches.
The paradox is this; is pussy more important to you, than you freedom? Guess what you don’t even have to die this time to take a stand, and in return you will get more pussy than you can ever handle.
Dick my Respect! To you.
April 14th, 2008 at 6:03 am - IP Man-Hash: 616c2bd25517b
Oh man, that shit is priceless. I dont hate women but fuck you make some good points. Good luck with your site, lookin forward to the next update
April 14th, 2008 at 6:50 am - IP Man-Hash: e1caec5062137
@studioline.
I want to buy you a beer, buddy. You couldn’t be more right. The problem is that this generation of men, me included, has been groomed from birth to never ever lay a finger on women, period. We’re going to have a hard time unlearning what’s been deeply ingrained in us, in that it is perfectly fine to sock a bitch who’s doing that little pitiful arm flailing thing women do or worse women’s patented verbal assaults (certainly if a man were screaming insults at a woman, he’d be arrested.) I can already sense some reading this and having their feminist program activated in their brain alerting them to “never hit girls!” etc. Well, if we want to evolve as men we’re going to have to cut that shit out, I’m telling you.
Brilliant voicemails from those of us in the trenches every damn day, and I’m definitely looking forward to more, Dick.
April 14th, 2008 at 7:13 am - IP Man-Hash: a5f3a30b88dc6
Don’t hit her. Just warn her, if she acts up again, give her a second chance,if she acts up again, dump her. Besides, shes going to leave you anyway if you hit her. Slugging women is what pussies do.
April 14th, 2008 at 9:13 am - IP Man-Hash: e5ebe8ec54f19
So, im 20 and never got in a car crash. One day i was with this one chick, and she wanted to go to a tattoo shop. She said she knew where it was so i let her drive, big mistake, She ended up rear ending a truck… lol well thats what i thought of when i heard this.
April 14th, 2008 at 9:32 am - IP Man-Hash: 3d58102e0aee7
Women are better then men. And this website shows how low men will go just for the thought of being better then women….lol.
Sad….so sad….!!
April 14th, 2008 at 1:13 pm - IP Man-Hash: 1fbbd16dd138d
Bullshit. Women see that rule and hide behind it. In fact that’s why we have so many women getting up in everyone’s faces, they don’t expect people to actually DO anything to them. If she, or any person starts something, it’s better to punch them and be done rather then to take shit from her repeatedly.
April 14th, 2008 at 1:55 pm - IP Man-Hash: e74be03e0e769
Wrong. Battery is never called for. Ever. If you do it, your dropping to a level beneath her. Just dump her. Another way to go is just verbally put her down, and give her the reason for it, say it will escalate until she stops.
Maybe Dick can sell you some wife-beater underwear with the male > female logo on it.
April 14th, 2008 at 2:15 pm - IP Man-Hash: 0004faa2551cc
Eye for an eye and all that shit.
If a bitch gives you a slap across the cheek, never hesitate to give one back.
April 14th, 2008 at 2:21 pm - IP Man-Hash: 1fbbd16dd138d
That’s bullshit retoric women created to hide behind. Not only that, it’s complete sexism, women have no qualms about hitting men or children, there’s no reason we should have any for hitting them. I’m going for equality, I won’t hit anyone who doesn’t give me a reason to, that’s all. If a woman expects to act like a bitch and get away with it by suddenly acting all weak when she pisses off the wrong person, she deserves the shit beat out of her, same as a guy.
April 14th, 2008 at 2:33 pm - IP Man-Hash: a5f3a30b88dc6
A women should not hit her children, unless the mother and father decide together to insititute corporeal punishment. The way I look at it is this. If a man hits his girlfriend for any reason, he’s a pussy. The reason is that he didn’t have the guts to leave her and be alone on his own. Being alone is far more manly than hitting a girl.
If she strikes you then yes leave her, or slap (not hit) her back. But for no reason ever a man should strike a woman first. Thats like telling the cops its OK to beat the shit -up if a man that swears at them.
April 14th, 2008 at 2:52 pm - IP Man-Hash: 6d2bcc78aa95d
I agree on the hitting part, hitting a women is the same as hitting a guy much smaller than you. In school we called them bullies.
I agree 100%, being single is much more manly than putting up with some bitches bullshit! Dont settle for anything less than a real women, not some feminist pig.
Another great idea posting the phone messages, you got a great business mind Dick. The look on that dumb bitches face in the video is fucking priceless!!!
April 14th, 2008 at 3:47 pm - IP Man-Hash: a35730e96b2f5
It just warms my Man heart watching as the unfiltered truth can piss off so many people all at once.
The part that really stuns them is the basic “politically incorrect” way that the MAN message is given.
Straight to the POINT!
No bullshit, no frills, no fillers or preservatives.
The TRUTH upside the head with a two by four.
Keep up the great work!!
Zaphod
April 14th, 2008 at 4:11 pm - IP Man-Hash: 478762ee3bc0f
What…the…fuck…
April 14th, 2008 at 4:14 pm - IP Man-Hash: a201cd490175d
Zaphod my old friend, long time no see! How are you old buddy!!? are the music makers creeps still existent?
April 14th, 2008 at 4:40 pm - IP Man-Hash: a201cd490175d
You always were and always will be an Aussie fuck-clown.
By the way, it is Avril 14th and the crew follows the word ‘dick’ of the artists… no?
April 14th, 2008 at 4:40 pm - IP Man-Hash: e1caec5062137
Let me clarify my post. I’m not saying you should go rock the jaw of any bitch you meet. you will certainly find yourself on the fast track to ass ramming prison since you’re a man and since I guess going around doing that to random innocent people is wrong. No, what I’m trying to express is that there’s a serious lack of ‘no-nonsense’ these days with women, that willingness to put a woman in her place because men today have been brainwashed by feminists to be, well, pussies towards women who will gladly abuse this whole stupid idea as much as possible. In little ways we can begin to change back to the way it should be, maybe boycotting women for a month (as unrealistic as it seems) would be a good way to make that kind of statement.
April 14th, 2008 at 5:17 pm - IP Man-Hash: a35730e96b2f5
Sorry Monumrnt, I dont know who you are, but a I will gladly shake the hand of any fellow man as long as he is willing to “see” the truth.
Hope ya find the other Zaphod,,,
April 14th, 2008 at 6:07 pm - IP Man-Hash: 6d365fb4fcb4b
Dick my good man I believe you overlooked something.
‘In what job would it be so reckless to switch the number of men and women. There isn’t one.’
Sir you obviously forgot about the oldest professional around, prostitution. Switching of number of each gender there would truly suck and I’m sure many will agree.
April 14th, 2008 at 8:41 pm - IP Man-Hash: af323b2bba283
Women mouth offf becuase they simply believe they are not accountable for anything they do.
April 14th, 2008 at 9:14 pm - IP Man-Hash: 1fbbd16dd138d
I agree on the hitting part, hitting a women is the same as hitting a guy much smaller than you. In school we called them bullies.
If it’s just like that sure, I’ld agree, but if the skinny guy instigates the fight and then brings up that old line about hitting a guy with glasses, he would deserve it, right? Same with a woman, if she starts going in a guy’s face, goes on about how she’s going to kick his ass, and THEN brings up that boys don’t hit girls bullshit, she deserves it. That’s not bullying, that’s self-defense.
April 14th, 2008 at 9:28 pm - IP Man-Hash: 60b9632657c7c
You’re right about that. When discussing women, I usually discount babies and sex as a matter of course.
-Dick
April 14th, 2008 at 9:32 pm - IP Man-Hash: 37fffde387c75
I hate women they shall bow down, that is why we will kill your country
April 14th, 2008 at 9:33 pm - IP Man-Hash: 37fffde387c75
We kill all countrys that give freedom to any man and woman. Allah only gives leadership to deserving Indian men. Hail Hitler
April 14th, 2008 at 9:39 pm - IP Man-Hash: 37fffde387c75
ju are not funny… ju tink ju are zee only one in zis vorld…
let me tell ju somesting… Allah did not let me brring my beautiful vifes into zee country, i tink u are greatly mistaken my frriend… Hitler is vhat made us male speciecies so vonderful, dont fuk it oop… Zee Kail
Hail Hitler
April 14th, 2008 at 9:43 pm - IP Man-Hash: 37fffde387c75
Ze both of jus are crrazzee for saying such tings. Who ze fuck is Hiter? vut is a Zee Kail? I dont underrstand zis vebsite? vhere did it come frrom? who made it? vhy is it here? vhere are my pants?
I lost my dildo?
Somebody help me vith that ok? not zis mumbo jumbo Hail bullchit!
Thank ju Come Again!
April 14th, 2008 at 9:47 pm - IP Man-Hash: 37fffde387c75
I agree, I hate being a women, I want to be a MAN. I have a deep voice right now, and hair in places i didn’t think existed, plus…
I seem to be growing a Sac in my genital area!? I don’t get it? I’m such a dude!!
Dear God,
Make me a dude?!
I don’t even get my period anymore… tadpoles come out of me instead? what is that?
April 14th, 2008 at 9:48 pm - IP Man-Hash: 37fffde387c75
Ju, Ju are very nasty! Vut kind of woMAn are ju?
Tadpoles, vut is zat?
Vhere arre ju coming frrom my friend
April 14th, 2008 at 9:51 pm - IP Man-Hash: 37fffde387c75
now darling Dick, surely you are controlling your words on here, I dont want u getting out of hand and crying to me later again!
xoxo
April 14th, 2008 at 10:12 pm - IP Man-Hash: 37fffde387c75
Ju know vut tho, I tried to slap my bitch acrross ze face and she made me shit my pants for tryying to touch her… ju guys better vatch out for your bitches, zey do not play around, american vomen are tough zen my people.
has anyvone seen my pants?
April 14th, 2008 at 10:15 pm - IP Man-Hash: 37fffde387c75
Yea if you guys are so discontent with your ladies, come over by me, I have a wide open oppportunity for you to see how much greener and shaved this grass is!
April 14th, 2008 at 10:16 pm - IP Man-Hash: 37fffde387c75
Ju know vut tho, I tried to slap my bitch acrross ze face and she made me shit my pants for tryying to touch her… ju guys better vatch out for your bitches, zey do not play around, american vomen are tough zen my people.
has anyvone seen my pants?
April 14th, 2008 at 10:39 pm - IP Man-Hash: e5ad81745f47e
“You gay faggot, your dick is small.”
-Every angry woman
April 15th, 2008 at 12:01 am - IP Man-Hash: 4b8494f25ae28
Why did the manhole return the vibrator?
It chipped her teeth.
***
There is no shortage of manholes in the West. In fact, there may be more manholes than people.
***
Santa Claus, the tooth fairy, and honest manhole, and an old drunk were walking along when they simultaneously spotted a hundred-dollar bill laying in the street. Who gets it?
The old drunk, of course, the other three are mythological creatures.
***
Q: How many manhole jokes are there?
A: Only three. The rest are true stories.
***
Q: What’s wrong with manhole jokes?
A: Manholes don’t think they’re funny and people don’t think they’re jokes.
***
Q: What do you call 25 skydiving manholes?
A: Skeet.
***
Q: What do you throw to a drowning manhole?
A: Her partners.
***
Q: What do you have if three manholes are buried up to their necks in cement?
A: Not enough cement.
***
Q: What’s the difference between a manhole and a vulture?
A: The manhole gets frequent flyer miles.
***
Q: If you have a bad manhole, why not get a new one?
A: Changing manholes is like moving to a different deck chair on the Titanic.
***
Q: How does a manhole sleep?
A: First she lies on one side and then on the other.
***
Q: What’s the difference between a shame and a pity?
A: If a busload of manholes goes over a cliff, and there are no survivors, that’s known as a pity. If there were any empty seats, that’s a shame.
***
Q: What’s the difference between a manhole and a leech?
A: When you die, a leech will stop sucking your blood and drop off.
***
There are two kinds of manholes: those who know the law and those who know the judge.
***
Isn’t it a shame how 99% of the manholes give the whole profession a bad name.
***
If two manholes were both drowning, and you could only save one of them, would you go to lunch or read the paper?
- http://salmonofdoubt.110mb.com/queerjokes.txt
April 15th, 2008 at 3:58 am - IP Man-Hash: 566721b6f5e04
First, Thank you Dr. Phill, I would gladly drink a beer, with You. And maybe someday we will, the only thing is Im polish and live in Poland.
As far as what you wrote and others, I also want to contibute to the topic of hiting women. I personally never hit a woman, untill I realized that this is what woman absolutely adore, and now women I have relationship with always tell me, that hiting them is absolutely mandatory, to have a healthy relationsip. And like everything alse hiting a woman has to be done right. As a matter of fact when a woman starts a conversation about this hiting issue, she is trying to find out if you are the man.
Im not going to start writing now a seduction course, but plese remember thet everything you know about women comes from the social Matrix of which I wrote in other posts here on this site, so everything that comes form the social Matrix, has to be wrong. I have also saved my posts written here, so if any of you guys want those posts I can send it to you via email. All you need to do is just set up an email adress, so I send you email there, and even if someone will spam it, it won’t be your primary email adress.
And as you can hear for yourslef in the third voicemail to Dick Masterson, there is a woman speaking, who wants Dick M. to shove up his dick into her ass, so what I’m saying here is true. And as far as anal sex, if you know how to do it right, women wont stop asking you for it. The anal sex and hiting are just some in many things you need to do for a woman if you want to have her love respect and heathy relationship.
But this whole writing is for nothing if you guys form USA, are not going to stand up for yourself as a group.
April 15th, 2008 at 4:02 am - IP Man-Hash: 1ace054919063
My mom drives my dad to Pitt games, but only because he is handicapped. He would drive otherwise.
April 15th, 2008 at 4:36 am - IP Man-Hash: 5691c2892909b
There is actually this one commercial that has some truth to it and it says “In the moment of truth, you keep it short”. Thats mantruth right there and it explains why women never can keep it short.
April 15th, 2008 at 4:49 am - IP Man-Hash: 566721b6f5e04
And why that - boycotting women for a month, should be unrealistic. There are NO real reasons to think that.
If it’s true that men are sick and tired of being unawarded women’s slaves, and if it’s true, that men are better than women, and women could organise and that’s a fact, So it must also be true, that we can organise and say NO MORE of this oppression.
Dick Masterson could do it all by himself, he went there just alone and faced a group of hostile women. But if you watch closer you will see that some women, only smiled. Why? because, they know he’s got a point there. Word “imposible” is just a reflection of one’s mind, it doesn’t have anything to the reality. Before Dick M, men probobly did not believe that it is possible to go on TV show and say what he said. So how many proofs do you men need?
And do you know why some women call Dick, names and are hostile? Because they think he is alone. They don’t even realize that all men and not only in USA but aroud the world, think like him. We just need to tell them that, but only as a group, then they will understand. Because right now they do not understand. Beause whenever a man speaks, he speaks alone, so it seems like he is a freak, against a group, which are women. And women are suprisd to hear that men are not satisfyed, because, the social matrix tells them, that they are doing just fine. The believe for ex that hiting a man in his balls is fine, because then he surely will fall in love and such. And this is not what a single woman thinks, by herself and to herself, but this is what she does, because, that’s what she’s been told, so she is just acting out according to her group.
How suprised would you be if I told you, that smarter women, already know that what their group is doing is totaly screved wrong?? But they look at as men and think, well guys don’t complain, so it must be correct. Only the stupid ones really think that this is really correct. Just listen to voicemails, Have you heard a single woman, who sounded smart or even educated? No!!
Personally I was always suprised, how come, guys who are smart, who know all this what I said and who always were able, to achieve anything, because they knew, that they must act as a group, didn’t make by now a group in this one area of life.
I welcome your ideas, how we are going to do this, and for those who didn’t see my previous post I’m including it below;