Ask Dick: What is a Donkey Punch?
Out of the hundreds of men I have asked, only one has known the true and correct definition of The Donkey Punch.
The Donkey Punch is like the Highlander. There can be only one. Prepare to be educated.
The Donkey Punch is a sexual move like the missionary position or the threesome; and like most sexual moves, you can actually do it.
Here’s a list of things that the Donkey Punch is not is.
The Donkey Punch is not jizzing on a girl’s face and then punching her in the mouth.
That’s called assault and battery and it will send you straight to prison. It will also fuck up a girl’s face. Unless you’re the type of person who shits in mailboxes, fucking up a woman’s face on purpose is a major loss of Man Points. That’s like taking candy from a baby. It’s all they have.
The Donkey Punch is not hitting a girl in the head while you’re boning her.
Punching a woman in the head does nothing for your physical pleasure and might break your hand. It’s called a “boxer’s break”, and if you’re not a former boxer, let me tell you something about breaking your fist on someone’s head. It’s a loss of Man Points. The Man Points are doubled if that head belonged to a woman.
Breaking your hand on a head: -500 Man Points
…on a woman’s head: -1,000 Man Points
…while you’re nailing her: -10,000 Man Points
If you want to risk your Man Points, then that’s up to you.
The Donkey Punch is not striking a woman at the base of her neck during orgasm.
Women are like pinball machines. You put money in, you don’t get anything but a good time, and if you smack them around too much, it’s game over. A restraining order is the Tilt of life.
Smack it hard enough and you’ll break the machine. Then no one has any more fun.
What the Donkey Punch is, is a punch delivered to a woman’s ass during intercourse. That’s it. Try it yourself and you’ll know why they call it a Donkey Punch. If you disagree, why not invent a sexual move that involves a woman jumping off a roof and landing on your cock. Call it the Stupid Jackass.
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LMFAO
Dick, I gotta be honest with you, I don’t agree with more than half of the stuff that you post…
But despite that, I still gotta admit, this one is fucking HILARIOUS! I got a good laugh out of it. XD!
I’D SAY…WHATEVER..FUCK THIS AND FUCK THIS TOPIC ABOUT SEX AND PARTNERSHIP RELATIONS. LEE IS A STUPID CUNT, WHO EVER SAID THAT, I AGREE. ALL THE REST OF US, INCLUDING ME. WE ALL SUCK ASS..JUST FORGET THIS SHIT AND MOVE ON IN LIFE. WE DONT NEED EVERYONE TO WASTE 5 MINUTES OF THEIR LIFE DEBATING OVER SOME ISSUES LIKE THIS, ON A BLOODY WEBSITE LIKE THIS.
THE WEBSITE TELLS. BUT THATS BULLSHIT. MEN ARENT BETTER THAN WOMEN, NEITHER THE OPPOSITE.
I did this once in WoW. I got a couple of experience points but nothing special.
Everything is relative - during the wars in Britain when the men were away, the women took over manual labour and ran the countries infrastructure. The point is that both sexes have the ability to adapt, from huntergatherer times, when both sexes were more equal in terms of strength, to modern times, when it has to be said, the human body is becoming physically diminished, and that goes for men and women. Comments reguarding ‘ugly’ women belong in the dark ages - next you will be saying ‘burn the witch’. The only ugly thing in this life is the ignorant rambling of an intolerant, narrow minded lump of carbon.
The only problem with your argument is that those were true women, 60 years ago. Russian women build the tanks and grenades at the Ural for their men, American women assembled the planes for their men and German women cleared the rubble while their men suffered in prison camps.
Today´s feminist indoctrinated, materialistic entitlement whore princesses would just instantly loose the ´tude, break down and cry all day, if the shit really hit the fan.
That is true, but not all women can be defined in such terms. Some of us look at these women and despaire. But remember, men are becoming more and more redundent (and i think hence this page) and i can only speak for myself here, but i find there is a real defecit of ‘real’ men. Basically, we are all materialistic and selfish, and i dont know any men who could fix a tank, although that is not on my list of things to find out about a man. Maybe i need to rethink that one.
who ever does this is sick!!!
[...] I think that is the whole basis for the film! They’ve done a film about punching a girls bum? This claims to be the best definition [...]
actually the meaning of a donkey punch is when a guy is fucking a girl doggy style and as he goes from vagina to asshole he simultaneously punches her in the back of the head to take away from the pain in her ass!
And what women is goin to continue fuckin you after you do this to her?
Who cares! Fucking the same woman is not up there on a man’s list of priorities. If it were, men would actually WANT to get married. But they don’t. Fucking the same person over and over again is only appealing to stupid women who can’t get laid when they want, or are too fucking lazy.
Donkey punches.
Rusty Trombone.
Dirty Sanchez.
Too much to do, too little time.
You just havnt been with the right woman, and it takes trust to experiment, then you can get up to all sorts of stuff.
Jesus Christ Lee , you’re fucking stupid.
You can “get up to all kinds of shit” even when you don’t know a woman’s first (or last) name.
You keep trying to brainwash yourself into thinking that monogamy is the answer to a truly satisfying sex life….. but the rest of us know better.
“The right woman”.
What a joke.
Think about it this way then. If you have sex with someone once then dump them, whats you average time to find another partner, a couple of days if your not picky? Well, in that time if you have a girlfriend with a similar sex drive, you could have had a whole load of sex. If you get to know someone really well, you know exactly what to do to turn them on. It sounds to me like you have never experienced that, which is a shame.
Lee, you’re in a trolls-nest, hon. I recommend you go argue somewhere a little more productive.
Good idea, you cant argue with idiots.
We already have a hobby: clue batting morons like you.
real witty
You ‘guys’ do not have a clue what you are talking about. For humans to evolve, there was a requirement for both sexes to survive in terms of Darwinian fitness.
If you want to have an intellectial conversation, why don’t you have a look at a basic biology book, or if you are so much smarter than the average woman, have a look at Darwin, Dawkins and Bertrand Russel’s work, then, and only then would i think you are qualified to even skim the surface of the eternal debate - men v women.
At the end of the day guys, the fact that you spend your time wraped in this ‘witty’ banter only highlights the fact that you are frustrated (small penis syndrome) unlucky with women (crap in bed) and basically just a bunch of sad pathetic bitter loosers. Get over it, get a hobby and loose the attitude and you might get layed.
Learn to spell, you thick cunt. Anglo-American women do not like men - they like fat Divorce settlements.
These betas with their psychological hybrid of ignorance and arrogance are so cute and effeminate.
Ok, i might not be able to spell, but you can’t punctuate. And at least i can articulate myself wthout swearing.
In practice this leads to tyranny. Think about it.
I agree with you on all but one point - sterilization. Either evolution will resolve it on its own, or you might as well take out fat people, diabetics, idiots (who sets IQ requirements), short, overly tall, small breasted, too big forheads…the list goes on and on until we get the right assortment of heavenly bodies that think only the right things.
Even someone who thinks the other is weaker will ultimatly find someone on the opposite side that believes that men are stronger and wishes to live with men who feel that way. Endless variety.
Real task of socieity is to EMBRACE the Differences thru TOLERANCE. If husbands and wifes like to hit each other or just one - but its thier agreement - knock yourselves out. Whatever people choose together - thats there fun. When they decide its no longer fun - they either change the agreement or move on to another partner.
Personally I have no problem with women being equal - for the most part - but dammit, if thier so stuck on thier work career’s and dont put as much drive into sex and sexing up thier partner whats the point in dating them. Guess were back to Tolerance and moving on. Cheers.
Ok, late addition to the post, but I had to add… My husband and I were having sex, and after, there was a joke made about a donkey punch, during which we both realized we didn’t know exactly what that was. So! I looked it up, and here it is… but the comments following are a little alarming. It seems like everyone is wrong. The women seem to think they’re better than men, and the men (as the page title suggest) seem to think they’re better than the women. The truth is, they’re all shitbags as far as I can tell. Hitting during sex (or during anything) is allowable when both parties are in agreeance. Otherwise, it is assault, no matter how you slice it. As for women deserving to be hit? There is no justification. As for men having to be chivalrous at all times? There is no justification. The truth is, men and women are both people. Some women are idiots, some are smart, some are helpless, some are completely self sufficient. The same goes for men. I can’t see men as superior, because I’ve met far too many idiots. The truth is, all people are people, and trying to group idiots into categories based on sex gets you no where. Just drop the pretense and start viewing people by their values and weaknesses instead of their sex, already? Please! Any sex that views their opposite sex as inferior deserves to be sterilized.
She asks for it. I wasn’t even talking to her.
bola, that was unnecessary. The bitch satirises herself.
Better to have water than shit for brains, like you.
what? the sacks of water that take up the space a brain doesn’t? ur right!
I bet mine is easily bigger than yours.
Agreed and No, I never said I hated myself. I hate the fact that women have been stereotyped so crudly ,and should be, and I’m ashamed to be apart of and be thought of as these women are. In other words women like that give people like me a bad name. Thats all.
Respect shouldn’t be given to anyone. Respect has to be earned. Saying you hate yourself for being a woman is not something worth respect, only pity.