Either Shut Up or Don’t — But Please Do
Women have a real problem when it comes to speaking. The problem is that they do it. If women could just keep their fucking mouths shut, they wouldn’t get into any trouble in the first place.
Say goodbye to wife battery, say goodbye to mugging probably, say goodbye to violence against women in general.
Women can’t shut the fuck up though. But you can’t ever hear them either, so what the fuck?
If you try to have a conversation with a woman anywhere but The Cone of Silence, you are completely fucked. Women mumble. They mumble in life like they mumble in their dreams. It’s just a bunch of half-assed meanderings and abortions that seem like sentences and thoughts, but aren’t.
It’s not because women have no confidence like you’d think at first. You’re a man after all and the simplest explanation is always the most correct one. We’re talking about women, however. That means the correct explanation is the one that’s as stupid as possible.
In order to have no confidence, you have to have some kind of notion of confidence. Women don’t so that’s right out the window. So is the fact that women don’t know what they’re talking about. When women don’t know what they’re talking about, they talk twice as loud. Fuck, the less a woman knows, the louder her voice gets. That’s why when they’re talking about relationships and fucking them up, you can hear them over a dinner party of 15 — and especially when it comes to the subject of sexual dysfunction.
The truth is women are offended you can’t read their minds. If you could they’d call you a pervert or a child molester or something like that. It doesn’t matter because it’s impossible anyway and as a man I don’t waste my time opining on impossible bullshit. Women are offended you can’t read their mind, so they talk as low as possible to punish you for it.
Women also mainly learn to speak while shopping. During shopping, you can’t walk around shouting and singing like you can on a playground or a pub. Shopping is bullshit. It’s not about living life or having fun in any way, but since women all hate themselves and each other, they grow up doing it.
Conclusion? Women are conditioned like dogs to mumble. Try teaching a dog not to sit when you say sit. You can’t. Just buy hearing aids or better yet ignore every fucking woman who ever opens her mouth. It’s not like anything worth a shit is going to come out.
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July 5th, 2006 at 3:49 pm - IP Man-Hash: b6faf0e8d18af
You’re so right Dick.
Ever notice when several women get together the collective IQ drops to the lowest common denominator? One women says somthing totally stupid and they all agree with it. Emotive bulches are common in a group of women. Brain farts? Now that’s a womans creation.
July 5th, 2006 at 6:07 pm - IP Man-Hash: b6faf0e8d18af
Ok, bulches is not a word.
Lol
July 5th, 2006 at 9:56 pm - IP Man-Hash: 1e9bc0ac8f114
yeah you are right dick… men NEVER mumble
i hate girls
women suck.
July 6th, 2006 at 9:23 am - IP Man-Hash: 5950bb08d3016
I have the same problem with my SO. Everytime she says something important she is never facing me and I can’t hear shit that she says. Also she likes to do this when we are in separate rooms. God forbid I should ask her to repeat herself, in the past this would lead to fights and her telling me to get my ears checked even though she always had the TV volume up WAY louder than me.
Having a man brain I involved her male-family at a function and used it to my advantage and we all agreed that she mumbles when she talks. After a long discussion about man-logic I told her that everytime she does this I will tell her to stop mumbling and actually face me when she talks to me.
That stopped the fights about repeating and me not hearing well, but she still doesn’t face me.
I guess you can’t teach a female new tricks.
July 6th, 2006 at 12:26 pm - IP Man-Hash: 980cc8a8ac1a7
Oh yes. Must remember to put the fingernail files back exactly where & the way they were. Then quietly remove myself from there and make like it’s raining and the happytreefriends must’ve been up to nogood.
July 6th, 2006 at 1:18 pm - IP Man-Hash: dc4b477cfd13b
You want real fun, try a 12-year-old daughter heading directly into being a teenager. The girl can’t so much as order food at McDonald’s without having to repeat herself a couple of times.
It won’t work with an SO, obviously, but with my daughter, I’ve found that repeating back what it sounds like she said will piss her off so bad that she’ll start actually opening her mouth when she talks.
When she says something unintelligible and I repeat it back to her as, “Is ha di gah bih farblesouth?” it almost always leads to a clear restatement of: “I said, ‘It’s hard to to talk with marbles in my mouth!!’”
Also, repeating a few lines of “Alice’s Restaurant” is usually good:
“That was horrible. If you want to end war and stuff, you’ve got to learn to speak loudly and clearly all the time, so that people can hear you!”
And then there’s my middle school drama teacher’s admonition: “Drop your jaw and enunciate!”
When she’s really unintelligible, I’ll make her repeat back the phrase “Help me, Obi-Wan Kenobi, you’re my only hope,” as quickly and moving her mouth and lips in as exaggerated a fashion as possible.
You got to work on them young, or they’re ruined for life.
July 6th, 2006 at 9:52 pm - IP Man-Hash: eadd56da2c7c9
Unlike Dick, I’ve never seen a woman do that to the world at large. I’ve only ever seen them do it to their Significant Others.
I always thought that it was just female rudeness, but Dick’s theory that women are offended because you can’t read their minds may well be right.
-Big Al
September 19th, 2006 at 3:15 pm - IP Man-Hash: 494c480d0f622
Women have a huge problem shutting the fuck up. And they really do expect us to read their minds. I once had a Female get mad at me because I didn’t GUESS what she wanted to eat… ummm… how in the FUCK was I supposed to know what she wanted to eat?
Women act like fucking children.
September 19th, 2006 at 3:35 pm - IP Man-Hash: 4555637db20cf
We have all been through that shit.
June 10th, 2007 at 4:49 pm - IP Man-Hash: de7fd53f10710
This is totally wrong. Women don’t speak too quietly…they speak too LOUDLY. Whenever I’m in public, it’s ALWAYS the cunt’s voice that’s louder than everyone else’s, including guys. Cunts have to speak louder, cuz otherwise they can’t attract attention to themselves, which is their mission in life.
June 10th, 2007 at 4:50 pm - IP Man-Hash: de7fd53f10710
ps. my post was in reply to the “women mumble” complaint above. I fully agree with the other posters who are saying that cunts should generally shut the fuck up a lot more.
July 10th, 2007 at 4:44 pm - IP Man-Hash: 9a305b0d72d4d
uh wow, what a shitty parent for talking about your own child in such a demeaning way. you don’t deserve your daughter. perhaps she mumbles because she wasn’t taught how to speak properly or politely? maybe it’s YOUR fault.
July 10th, 2007 at 4:45 pm - IP Man-Hash: 9a305b0d72d4d
so you are basing your entire opinion about womyn on this one experience? please seek help.
July 10th, 2007 at 4:45 pm - IP Man-Hash: 9a305b0d72d4d
so go gay and shut it
July 10th, 2007 at 4:47 pm - IP Man-Hash: 9a305b0d72d4d
Unlike Dick, I’ve never seen a woman do that to the world at large. I’ve only ever seen them do it to their Significant Others.
I always thought that it was just female rudeness, but Dick’s theory that women are offended because you can’t read their minds may well be right.
-Big Al
to help you out, maybe whoever you’re thinking about didn’t feel like you communicated enough with her or you weren’t sensitive enough to her needs.
July 10th, 2007 at 4:48 pm - IP Man-Hash: 9a305b0d72d4d
so have women dealing with men. you guys are NOT unique. but i guess this is a good place to let our your e-man-tions
July 10th, 2007 at 5:14 pm - IP Man-Hash: 45a19a6365772
You’re majoring in English? What a waste of a university slot and tax-payers dollars. It’s like you are the walking - wobbling - embodiment of the quota system.
July 10th, 2007 at 5:24 pm - IP Man-Hash: 9a305b0d72d4d
lol, nice name. did your boyfriend finger you in the bumhole too hard today for you to be in an especially bad mood? i’m sawwy :(
i guess you live in a bubble, but everyone (m/f) has the ability to be obnoxious and loud at any given moment.
July 10th, 2007 at 5:27 pm - IP Man-Hash: 9a305b0d72d4d
does that turn you on or something? i know where you went to find that out so don’t think you’re special.
July 10th, 2007 at 5:33 pm - IP Man-Hash: 160e0041dcad8
You are a flaming homophobe.
July 10th, 2007 at 7:59 pm - IP Man-Hash: 9a305b0d72d4d
You are a flaming homophobe.
how so? am i bashing gays? NO. i’m bashing YOU. i know “manly men” can’t stand the thought of being called gay, right?
July 10th, 2007 at 8:00 pm - IP Man-Hash: 9a305b0d72d4d
oh yea, and how is being a “homophobe” any different from making a website to bash womyn? huh huh huh huh?
August 4th, 2007 at 4:51 am - IP Man-Hash: 9a0bebf713c23
Womyn? …what the fucking hell is that?
August 4th, 2007 at 10:10 am - IP Man-Hash: 120929bb494ad
Chantal thinks she’s innovative and unique when she’s doing nothing that other fuckwits haven’t done a trillion times before.
August 4th, 2007 at 10:28 am - IP Man-Hash: 9a7304f54f484
It is not.
Thank god this is not about bashing women, it is about proving men are better than women (which is pretty self evident, actually)
And you are supporting that belief by failing to grasp something simple like that.
It is quite simple.
Womyn deserve to be shot on sight. That goes for wimmin too.
Women deserve better. In a few rare cases.
August 4th, 2007 at 11:23 am - IP Man-Hash: 66d38a12d22d6
@ Talon… ah, I see. I always thought it was some stupid thing feminists came up with so they didn’t have to say “man”. I wouldn’t put that above them, seriously.
I personally am HUGE on equality among the sexes. I’m right up there with all the militant activists. I would love to see women accept the huge workload, with horrible pay. I love the idea of having no BS promotions through sexual favors. I would love it if women could feel secure enough to do their jobs, without the outlandish pressures of the “males” telling them how to do their job right, because they just set something on fire.
I would love women to be free and empowered to work 13 hour shifts, and than head to another part time job to make 1k a month, because the SO does nothing but languish all day reading Cosmo. I think it’s great that female activists are commited, productive members of society, that are liberated enough to wear makeup to a construction site. And as we all know, productivity and teamwork are inextricably linked. Feminists work fantastic with everyone, and NEVER raise a fuss. EVER.
It’s creeps like us “men” that prevent the superior women from having urinals. C’mon guys, it’s about equality.
… yes, that was sarcasm, laidies.
August 4th, 2007 at 2:24 pm - IP Man-Hash: 42c969685cd0a
I can stand being called gay. But it’s not true. I’d just tell them so and then walk away. But you. HA. You could drive some men gay.
August 4th, 2007 at 2:37 pm - IP Man-Hash: 980cc8a8ac1a7
I do not concur.
August 4th, 2007 at 4:40 pm - IP Man-Hash: 99bbf13b58c1b
I do not concur.
I can undersand that. I was, of course, exaggerating.
I have a problem with people that use the label “womyn” or “wimmin” becuase “woman” has man in it.
August 4th, 2007 at 9:49 pm - IP Man-Hash: 66ec8c2515d74
@ Talon: It was a rather humorous hyperbole too. Saying that “womyn” or “wimmin” should be shot on sight, as opposed to women, was rather clever. I have now added that gem to my repertoire if attacks to feminists’ bullshit.
August 4th, 2007 at 10:01 pm - IP Man-Hash: 71d0be43b04c7
Here’s another one. Whenever a gurl comes up to me and tries to treat me like shit, I call her out on her bluff. When she tries to get her huddled in-crowd to back her up, I say, “That’s a funny girl who can’t fight her own battles.” If she’s stupid enough to reply, simply state the obvious. “I have 50% more muscle mass than you. It does not matter if you’re a guy or a girl, or how good a fighter you are. You can’t beat me up.” Of course don’t try to fight her, just set her straight. If she is still being a little cunt, explain to her that an attack strategy of going for the opponent’s genitals is hardly a fool-proof plan, and that trying to solve her personality issues with violence is hardly improving her image.
Worked for me, wonderfully. Oddly enough, I overheard the chick talking about how much she wants to have sex with me. Apparently the in-crowd pussies aren’t the sexiest men around. What a surprise.
I suppose it may also have something to do with the fact that people who can not stand up for themselves without their ‘friends (protection)’ are just unable to become anything more than figureheads.
They are hardly inspiring, have proven time and time again to be immoral and unjust, and the few times they have been given a position of any true power they have squandered it in the most unremarkable way. It’s like an ‘adult’ version of those emo kids who wear clear glasses and just scream, “Look at how anti-conformist I, like, am! I have pink hair!!!”
You really have guts, dearie. Now why don’t you and all you unique kids get back in your little social clique, I have something better to do than to lord over how much I’ve whored myself out.
Having more people similar to you hardly makes you better than me.
August 5th, 2007 at 5:24 am - IP Man-Hash: 42c969685cd0a
I hate people with pink hair. They’re not impressing anyone.
August 5th, 2007 at 6:52 am - IP Man-Hash: 576202da90258
When I see several things on a woman, such as:
Excessive tattoos & piercings
Way out revealing clothing
Extreme hair colour
I am impressed, because this is usually a sign that I am going to get laid without having to put in too much effort.
November 6th, 2007 at 8:56 pm - IP Man-Hash: 86ffa21dfb4df
Oh my fucking god…. I cannot believe some of the completely idiot shit I’ve read on this site so far. First of all, though, for many women, yes I can agree to some things, but that is not so for ALL women. Believe it or not, there ARE many women who are not stupid cheating obnoxious whores.
I will say right now that I am a woman. I know you may not necessarily want women on this site, but nevertheless, women come on here anyway, as you may have already guessed.
I will also admit right now that it is true for me that I would like my significant other to be able to know what it on my mind, although I know that it is impossible for them to actually read my mind. I will next admit that I do not consider myself “advanced” in the English language, even though it is my first language, although I do know for a fact that I at least know it better than a lot of people (female AND male) that I have talked to over the years.
I admit to mumbling or talking too loud, although, even though you may not believe it, but I do have a million thoughts racing inside my head searching for the right words to say. I am not trying to be rude. If I was trying to be rude, I would look directly at you, roll my eyes, then walk away annoyed.
On another page… Top Ten Reasons Men Are Better Than Women… What the fuck is wrong with you?! Men do not suffer from Tourette Syndrome? Excuse me, but I’ve met quite a few males who DO in fact suffer from that. Next on that list. Women are racist. What the hell. As if men aren’t as well? Everyone is to some degree (just like I believe everyone is “bisexual” to some degree). Look around at the fucking world, you idiots, and maybe you will find some truth outside of the towns of whores and Hollywood sluts that you’ve come to believe are true for all women.
I bet, if any of you would bother taking your mind off of these thoughts for even ten minutes and talking to a REAL woman, you would realize how idiotically false this site is.
I’ve said before that I do not deny that some things on this site are true for some reason, hell, I know plenty, but do not even think for one moment that it is true for all. There are still MANY women in the world not completely corrupted by stupid Hollywood idealisms. Also, take a look at some of your fellow “men” as well. MANY are just as bad, and even worse than how you have described women on this site.
Before I end this, I will say, maybe this has been rather unbearably long for those of you who’ve bothered to read this (especially if you are a male who believes in this site). I also realize that many of you may end up attempting to make fun of me for simply being a woman leaving a comment on this site (or hell, you may just make fun of me for that comment there, or maybe not).
There is a lot more that I COULD say, but that I feel do not currently need to be said. Maybe someday I shall visit again and leave another comment somewhere on this site talking about other things that many of you may not care to read. Whether you bother to read this or not, I really could care less actually, because I know these words still will probably not change most of your minds; But at least I can have hope that SOMEONE might respond positively.
Here’s hoping there are still intelligent beings somewhere in this world.
-Aly-
November 10th, 2007 at 1:54 am - IP Man-Hash: f0c211e7b9c3b
Men have 3 interests and the only reasons you started this blog… money, getting their dicks sucked (and don’t kid yourself about those orgasms or that swallowing shit)and feeling superior to everyone else on the planet. You are the most pathetic human being (oh ok you may be 1 knotch below serial killers but I am confident that you are a rapist) I have ever heard of and I feel deeply sorry for your mom. How could a woman spawn such a monster?
January 10th, 2008 at 8:12 pm - IP Man-Hash: f45663f0413db
ok. i just want to say that i am not one of those women =[ and i do agree with most of the things said, about most women. and im not going to argue with any man on here but really not every women is lyk that. i actually obey my boyfriend, do not argue with him, ask permission to speak wen i think its not an appropriate time for me to speak, do things for him, say yes sir… blahblahblah the whole nine yards. everything women should do. and plz dont say anything about the way i am typing b.c i kno its wrong. im 17 and im used to myspace. i dont care rite now about the correct spelling, im just typing a quick thing. i kno english.. anyway yea there are a lot of retarded women out there who are lyk that but not EVERYONE its not fair to the ones that lyk to please men and ppl lyk me :( my boyfriend is just lyk yu and maybe yu just havnt found the rite girl . one who knos her place. but there are some out there b.c im sure not every man that thinks the way yu do is single. yes i kno men are stronger, smarter and better but there are a lot of stupid ones out there too ones that just sit on their lazy asses and get fat while their wives serve them. so men well NOT ALL men are perfect. i believe if the man works hard and is a MAN. not a pussy then he diserves a good respectful, obedient wife. but a lazy fat ass is not a man so doesnt diserve anything but a bitchy whining complaining whore :) sorry for writing so much. byebye.
January 10th, 2008 at 8:17 pm - IP Man-Hash: 55548152be297
Why don’t you go back to ‘Top Ten reasons Men are better than women’ and read my response to another miserable harpy who attempted to argue with logic.
- Sgt Reyes
January 10th, 2008 at 8:19 pm - IP Man-Hash: 55548152be297
If you truly are like that, stay that way and don’t let the women around you ‘infect’ you with the westernized woman’s FUBAR mentality
- Sgt. Reyes
January 10th, 2008 at 9:12 pm - IP Man-Hash: 55548152be297
And pray tell what is a ‘REAL’ woman? One who has mastered the art of Manipulating a man? Or mastered deceitfulness?
A real woman would know:
- When she’s not wanted
- How to shut the fuck up.
- Sgt Reyes
April 11th, 2008 at 11:57 am - IP Man-Hash: 416aa8dd410e6
Sgt. Reyes if you men who claim to be so intelligent and better than women can be manipulated by a woman than I’m sorry you’re not intelligent! I would also like “Dick” Masterson to explain to me why men sexually molest, rape and kill children? Why do they do it?
May 14th, 2008 at 6:49 pm - IP Man-Hash: e5ad81745f47e
Jesus christ, i love how accurate this article is. I was standing in a food line today and these two fat cunts behind me had a fucking 5 minute conversation trying to decide between the turkey wrap and the chicken salad. You beastly broads! i recommend 2 rice cakes and a 2 hour bicycle ride!!!!!!!!!! FUCK OFF!