The Man Billboard — For Real
They told me it was impossible. They told me it was too expensive. They told me it was the stupidest thing they’d ever heard.
They were wrong.
Hold onto your man beans, fellows and gentlemen, while I present the ultimate plan for the ultimate fund raiser: The Man Billboard.
The Man Billboard
The Man Billboard is an erection in the name of manliness. It’s an erection in the name of that special majority of the commuting workforce who actually get the job done every day — and bust their man ass doing it. That majority is called ‘men’. The Man Billboard is also an erection in the face and hair of the of all those chubby-ankled secretaries — those worker she-bees and profemtionals, who do little more at work each day than text message their boyfriends and annoy workmates with perfume, heels, and fuck-ups.
A penny saved is a woman fired.
Most importantly, the Man Billboard is an erection for you: the loyal readers of MenAreBetterThanWomen.com
Feast your eyes on the majesty — the harmony of art and logic what comprise a ‘fuck You’ to 51% of Earth. Then feast your eyes on the donation meter because only you can make it happen.
When I first envisioned the Man Billboard more than a year ago, they told me it was impossible. I’m not talking about women here. Of course women told me it was impossible. Women think losing twenty pounds or getting married after 30 is impossible. Here’s a marriage tip for women over 30: shut the fuck up and quit chopping your hair off at the shoulder. That looks old. Women probably don’t even understand that billboards can be purchased at all. As usual, women prefer an imaginary world. In this case, one where billboards grow naturally and are aware of upcoming movies.
Advertising companies told me it was impossible. And as business usually does, it makes sense. By accepting my money, any advertising company would be subject to a rain of Molotov Tampons or other silly female retaliations — perhaps a barrage of burning paternity suits for children the advertising company didn’t father. If “not my sperm” doesn’t hold up in court anymore, why should “companies don’t have sperm”?
But thanks to me, that’s all changed.
By leveraging the mighty marketing arm of Simon & Schuster — who are owned by CBS, the channel that airs Dr. Phil — I have been given the rare opportunity to erect manliness in a major metropolitan area. All that’s needed is your help.
The goal is $6,000. I will explain why below.
$5,000 - $10,000
If donations total in this range, the Man Billboard will be erected high above the streets of a major metropolitan area for one month. Whenever I think of it, I like to imagine such a manly gesture flying high above the picket line at an abortion clinic. The symbolism is clear. Women can hold signs, but manliness will always fly high in the sky without effort, keeping an eye on everything and consoling women who are making the right decision.
$11,000 - $25,000
This will erect the Man Billboard in a high demand area and/or within sight of a freeway for one month. Think of someplace that typically has a 60-foot tall man in his underwear. Now think of getting some real manliness in that place. Men are better than women.
$25,000+
Time square, the Sunset Strip, just like when having a son, the sky is the limit with this kind of cash.
Manclusion
We’ve all had a good bit of fun over the years here at MenAreBetterThanWomen.com, but now it’s time to take that fun to the world. Give a dollar, give ten, take a collection hat around your office or army base, do whatever you can to fly manliness high and proud.
Kate - $40
jeff - $60
Omny Devi - $300
wolfe - $100
Biff - $50
buster - $100
Robert - $35
Omny Devi - $150
TruthSayer - $50
Rich - $20
Luke - $50
Pedro - $100
Michael - $10
Michael - $20
Guy - $15
Mert - $20
Julius Stronghold - $26
Bryan - $15
James - $25
Regretful Morning - $5
Are Sagebakken - $50
Andrew - $10
jose - $1
Björn - $2
Alex - $1.50
Ryan - $5
April 12th, 2008 at 2:46 pm - IP Man-Hash: 062703d978411
“in a goddadivda baby/don’t you know that I love you” (then the bitchin’ scale).
Hey, thanks for bring up the first couple! It’s a ‘onestopshop’. I so very agree that Adam was indeed made first-birth order is everything, isn’t it? My theory is that Eve hadn’t figured out how to achieve orgasm yet because she was younger than Adam. How else could an eavesdropping serpent ‘worm’ his way into her with envy. Yes envy. They call it penis envy, but it was actually just ignorance and naivite-Eve was the more speciallized of the two…and …Adam was just a kid and wasnt’ bored into apedom with himself yet.
In the end, the man blamed God, the woman blamed the serpent.
I think men should lead like they were designed to do. Women need someone stable and level-headed to be loyal to and admire… they just turn into a herd of degenerate, purposeless sluts.
All human beings need vision and purpose.
Male and Female made he them?
April 17th, 2008 at 6:12 pm - IP Man-Hash: beb3d8cc63c6e
What a waste of money! If men were so smart they would be donating the money to a good cause to ensure the growth of the human race or at least to ED (Erectile Dysfunction). Thats why men will never be smarter then women. This website proves it. They should call this website “How men waste money”. I bet Warren Buffet is not contributing to this website. Thanks guys for helping us women prove once again men are not smater then women.
April 19th, 2008 at 8:08 am - IP Man-Hash: 3e8d1e2b2a4c4
According to Richard Lynn and Paul Irwing, of the universities of Ulster and Manchester respectively, men have greater general intelligence and more sophisticated spatial visualization abilities than women. Who are you kidding, you bloody Yankee Anglo-fuck on a McDonalds’ diet? Most women are dumber than fuck and that most certainly includes you, moron.
April 19th, 2008 at 9:13 am - IP Man-Hash: 004dbdabeb7cf
@Commander Scott- everybody here recognizes you as a borderline-autistic fuck-tard. Leave this site immediately, and seek treatment at the facility I have provided a link for below. For your convenience, I will be happy to arrange for someone to take your place of employment of shelving books at your local public library. Sincerely, No Manhole
http://psych.ucsf.edu/lpphc.aspx?id=438
April 19th, 2008 at 9:48 am - IP Man-Hash: 3e8d1e2b2a4c4
Miss Manhole:
I’m afraid the only lower functioning autistic in this room is yourself, you sick Yankee Anglo-fuck whore. I hope you anger your husband to such an extent that sometime in the near future, he finds himself with no other option other then to take a baseball bat to your head. The fact that everyone hates you on this site is simply proof positive of your numerous difficulties forming interpersonal relationships with others in real life, with the possible exception of the right thumb and forefinger you daily employ for your chief obsession: frequent manual clitoral stimulation. Anyway, why don’t you do this site a favour and insert a stick of dynamite, with an already lit fuse, into your over-stretched twat that smells so bad it actually contributes more to global warming than anything else. Maybe, after doing such, we won’t have to hear from the flapping lips of that frigid Yankee cunt of yours anymore…
April 19th, 2008 at 10:01 am - IP Man-Hash: 004dbdabeb7cf
@Commander Scott- possibly a chief regret of mother-nature would be that the 20-mile diameter meteor that slammed into Earth 65 million years ago that caused the Alvarez Extinction event, which managed to wipe-off the Dinasours from face of the earth, failed to eliminate your direct ancestor, Fuck-tard Erectus. Another great chance was lost when Skylab fell to earth in the 1970’s, as the football sized debris appeared to miss your father, Fuck-tard Cro-magnon. My greatest fear, Commander, is that you might find your Sister, Fucktard Sue, you will them mate with her, and she will produce a disgusting litter of little fucktards that could potentially inter-bread with one another. Hopefully the local dog catcher will mistake your fucktard children for small rodents and they will be immediately exterminated because of the public health threat.
Fucktard Scott meets Fucktard Sue…and they whirl and they twirl and they dangle…floating like the heaves above…must by Fucktard love……
AAAAGGGGGHHHHHH!!!!!!!
Good day, Commander.
April 19th, 2008 at 10:26 am - IP Man-Hash: 3e8d1e2b2a4c4
Miss Manhole:
Settle down, young lady. I wouldn’t want your personal judgment to become so clouded by both your neurasthenia and visibly hysterical condition that you accidentally trip down a flight of stairs and end up permanently breaking your neck at the end of such a long tumble. As a further remedy for alleviating the symptoms of your obviously histrionic behaviour, I strongly suggest increasing the dosage of your prozac medication from a measly 80 milligrams to 120 milligrams per day.
In short: get the fuck off the site, you frigid Yankee cunt. Don’t you have anything better to do? Like frigging your cliteris or being on the receiving end of domestic violence from your husband?
April 19th, 2008 at 10:31 am - IP Man-Hash: 004dbdabeb7cf
@Commander- I would leave you alone, except for the fact that you are a chronic liar–therefore, I believe you to be the lowest form of scum on earth possible. I will forever target my ridicule toward you, and Doubt–well, at least until he grows up. I assume you are already a fully grown fuck-tard. Sincerely, No manhole.
April 19th, 2008 at 10:46 am - IP Man-Hash: 3e8d1e2b2a4c4
Miss Manhole:
You are both a Yankee feminist and a Marxist-Leninist revolutionary; this automatically makes the worst piece of shit in existence. You are already a living, breathing, moving target from the the primary forces of institutionalized male patriarchal dominance.
April 19th, 2008 at 11:31 am - IP Man-Hash: 990da5f53c7cb
@Commander- I have absolutely no desire for the proletariat to control the means of production. However, it is clear from your prior posts that you wish to be the next Pol Pot, as you have endorsed, on multiple posts, the extermination of caucasian women about the globe. In at attempt to make this more palitable, you have falsified scientific facts to make women appear sub-human, much like the Nazi’s did of the Jews. The only sub-human is you, Commander, probably because you have a disfigured penis from an accident during circumcision. Then, the nurse dropped you on your head after she fell on the freshly-mopped hospital floor, destroying your pituitary gland and therefore stunting your growth, hence why people think of you as “that fucktard-man”. Don’t take your personal misfortunes out on the rest of the normal people of the world, Commander.
April 19th, 2008 at 11:40 am - IP Man-Hash: d653cff06dec4
I hope women are scientificallly subhuman because sentience on par with males would make their behavior far more evil than the rutting degenarate but natural impulses of bonobo apes.
If so.. a nice gas death or something as passive and serene doesn’t seem just at all.
And justice, glory, and power are the chief goals of the patriarichal New Order that will be constructed over the corpses of charred manhole’s en masse.
April 24th, 2008 at 9:23 pm - IP Man-Hash: 3e8d1e2b2a4c4
In actuality, women are sub-human beings who are both biologically and intellectually inferior to men.
April 28th, 2008 at 11:10 am - IP Man-Hash: a09182ecba5d2
I think the money man-thermometer needs to be updated.
April 30th, 2008 at 5:45 pm - IP Man-Hash: 60b9632657c7c
Done.
-Dick
May 3rd, 2008 at 6:39 pm - IP Man-Hash: 2a495e47f1263
dick where are you i love you i want you right now ha ha ha come on u now you want to chat
May 5th, 2008 at 11:26 am - IP Man-Hash: 3e8d1e2b2a4c4
Get off the site, you frigid American bitch. You know where the door is.
May 9th, 2008 at 8:31 am - IP Man-Hash: 0ba9ed147c575
Just to add something to this site…I got kind of bored and started watching the videos on this website and I saw a link for feministing.com. Immediately after i visited the website, my computer crashed due to the plethora of bullshit. iI they want people to visit, mabey they should, oh, i don’t know, tell the truth?
May 9th, 2008 at 11:09 am - IP Man-Hash: 962ea90c34fa1
millerlite546 , try feministing.org. It’s much safer on your computer.
Deathslayer
May 13th, 2008 at 11:30 am - IP Man-Hash: 0b803370e197a
Why should they tell the truth, they want women to visit, amirite?
Anywho, I was so busy remembering the bullshit I forgot about the joke site about it. Thanks for reminding me.
May 13th, 2008 at 11:36 am - IP Man-Hash: 0b803370e197a
It doesn’t look like you’ve installed WP yet. Try running install.php.
Okay, did something happen to it or what? I was going to look at the joke site and got that instead.