The Man Billboard — For Real
They told me it was impossible. They told me it was too expensive. They told me it was the stupidest thing they’d ever heard.
They were wrong.
Hold onto your man beans, fellows and gentlemen, while I present the ultimate plan for the ultimate fund raiser: The Man Billboard.
The Man Billboard
The Man Billboard is an erection in the name of manliness. It’s an erection in the name of that special majority of the commuting workforce who actually get the job done every day — and bust their man ass doing it. That majority is called ‘men’. The Man Billboard is also an erection in the face and hair of the of all those chubby-ankled secretaries — those worker she-bees and profemtionals, who do little more at work each day than text message their boyfriends and annoy workmates with perfume, heels, and fuck-ups.
A penny saved is a woman fired.
Most importantly, the Man Billboard is an erection for you: the loyal readers of MenAreBetterThanWomen.com
Feast your eyes on the majesty — the harmony of art and logic what comprise a ‘fuck You’ to 51% of Earth. Then feast your eyes on the donation meter because only you can make it happen.
When I first envisioned the Man Billboard more than a year ago, they told me it was impossible. I’m not talking about women here. Of course women told me it was impossible. Women think losing twenty pounds or getting married after 30 is impossible. Here’s a marriage tip for women over 30: shut the fuck up and quit chopping your hair off at the shoulder. That looks old. Women probably don’t even understand that billboards can be purchased at all. As usual, women prefer an imaginary world. In this case, one where billboards grow naturally and are aware of upcoming movies.
Advertising companies told me it was impossible. And as business usually does, it makes sense. By accepting my money, any advertising company would be subject to a rain of Molotov Tampons or other silly female retaliations — perhaps a barrage of burning paternity suits for children the advertising company didn’t father. If “not my sperm” doesn’t hold up in court anymore, why should “companies don’t have sperm”?
But thanks to me, that’s all changed.
By leveraging the mighty marketing arm of Simon & Schuster — who are owned by CBS, the channel that airs Dr. Phil — I have been given the rare opportunity to erect manliness in a major metropolitan area. All that’s needed is your help.
The goal is $6,000. I will explain why below.
$5,000 - $10,000
If donations total in this range, the Man Billboard will be erected high above the streets of a major metropolitan area for one month. Whenever I think of it, I like to imagine such a manly gesture flying high above the picket line at an abortion clinic. The symbolism is clear. Women can hold signs, but manliness will always fly high in the sky without effort, keeping an eye on everything and consoling women who are making the right decision.
$11,000 - $25,000
This will erect the Man Billboard in a high demand area and/or within sight of a freeway for one month. Think of someplace that typically has a 60-foot tall man in his underwear. Now think of getting some real manliness in that place. Men are better than women.
$25,000+
Time square, the Sunset Strip, just like when having a son, the sky is the limit with this kind of cash.
Manclusion
We’ve all had a good bit of fun over the years here at MenAreBetterThanWomen.com, but now it’s time to take that fun to the world. Give a dollar, give ten, take a collection hat around your office or army base, do whatever you can to fly manliness high and proud.
Kate - $40
jeff - $60
Omny Devi - $300
wolfe - $100
Biff - $50
buster - $100
Robert - $35
Omny Devi - $150
TruthSayer - $50
Rich - $20
Luke - $50
Pedro - $100
Michael - $10
Michael - $20
Guy - $15
Mert - $20
Julius Stronghold - $26
Bryan - $15
James - $25
Regretful Morning - $5
Are Sagebakken - $50
Andrew - $10
jose - $1
Björn - $2
Alex - $1.50
Ryan - $5
Bryan - $10
Sam - $10
bola - $10
Courtney - $1
Anonymous - $1473
Bryan - $10
Mike - $4
Eric - $20
Grewal - $1
Terry - $5
Barry - $20
Anthony - $20
Patrick - $1
Michael - $5
Sam - $10
James - $2
Massimo - $6
Sheridan - $1
Adrian - $31
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do proceeds from the sale of men>women wear contribute to the cause? i’m considering a purchase, although i’m bummed that the tank top isn’t made in the usa.
huh…then i’d be kind of a walking billboard.
(bill-whore?)
I’m terrified. Really. Those crazy religious bastards put up billboards that said “GodHatesFags.com” and what did it get them? More hits to their website. Dick is hitting you guys up for money for his OWN cause and all of you morons buy it. The most it will do is draw a few more whiny men and a ton more bitchy women at which point you people will do nothing but WHINE more about how women “can’t follow the rules by not coming here waaahhhh.” Then Dick will sell a few more books and there will be a few more people talking about how much of a nutbag he is. Are you guys really that naive? You really think putting up a fucking billboard will start some kind of anti-woman revolution? If I were one of you headcases I would want to draw the least amount of attention to my ridiculous ideas as possible. Let’s be honest…no one likes to be ridiculed and intolerance is looked at as nothing but a silly and ignorant shield for the weak minded follower. Would any of you tell anybody you know in real life that you are addicted to an anti-woman forum on the internet? Of course you wouldn’t! Because it’s embarrasing!! Doesn’t that tell you anything about where your money is going to?
Why the fuck would I want to leave my two jobs in NY for Kansas? Pfft.
I was only implying that my home state would be great to get the point across to all types of people. Stop trying to start shit like a typical woman. Or are you one of those ‘angry feminist dykes’ that just so happened to get offended? Hmm..?
Either way, the replies for this blog entry of Dick’s should be in support of the billboard- not attacking those who are willing to donate. Clearly, even if you’re NOT in support of the billboard going up in a metro area, your opinion wouldn’t matter anyways. It’s going to happen. Like it or not.
I’ve been browsing for not long, found this through Tucker Max’s message board, very impressed with your work.
I would like to see this erected, so I will donate soon.
For all my brothers working on buildings sites across the world! MAN FTW!
Angry Feminist Dykes huh? I think the Westboro Baptist Church may have some openings if you would like to continue your tour of hate mongering…of course that might actually require you to leave your house.
@MeanInGreen - Well said!
-The Rooster
That’s fucking great. We will all be spreading the word.
After the billboard goes up and all the media attention hits, do you think youll be able to afford the webhosting fees? Millions of people visiting this website might be expensive.
And King Wang, you didn’t even mention all the crazy protesters, like those peta people. When it goes up, some femenazis will get an aneurysm.
As always, the slowest talk the mostest. Yes, that is a word, like “Verbal Molestation of Retardation”.
The IRS owes me money. When they send it to me, I will be happy to send it to you.
San Francisco sounds best. (A)Gays (B)Women (C)Cradle of Natural Oddities and Freaks
Tell me the exposure THERE wouldn’t be insane.
I think I might declare you to be an idiot. Idiot.
Wow, what a place. So if your theory is that men are better than women, wouldn’t that make intersexed people better than everyone else combined? I think I might declare it to be so!
Well Lady XX, there’s only one way it’s going to happen.
Tell your friends.
-Dick
Oh, if only you could get it put up in my state… NYC, ranking #1 :)
I realize it’s alot of money for that area, but you’d spread the word to SO many: average joes, angry feminist dykes, men who have yet to see the light (or trying to find relatable websites).. and tourists! Seems like everyone in manhattan is ‘just visiting’. Either way, I can’t wait for this to be put up regardless of what city.
Mantastic, gentlemen! I can’t tell you how much this manly generosity warms my withers.
The Man Billboard is happening for real. Spread the word.
-Dick
oh, and $50 more to the cause Dick
saying apples are better than oranges doesn’t mean you hate oranges moron
you are wrong on 2 counts, 1 it is not about revenge it is about informing people that the feminist movement is full of shit, and 2, vengeance can be a deterent towards others wronging you.
what the fuck is this, it’s ok for women that identify themselves as feminists to claim men are all worthless potential rapists that are good for nothing except basic manual labour because thats what they pulled out of their asses?
what has that to do with the assertation that men are better than women… I can tell you women fighting alongside men is the exception that proves the rule that men were the defenders of civilization.
this website is about those checks and balances being defeated and rendered impotent by chunder heads such as yourself that can talk a pretty sentence and regurgitate multisylabic words but can’t think in a rational manner for themselves and thus accept any propaganda forced down their throats as fact.
I hope you are fangourously devoured by a gelatinous mass that calls it’self a feminist.
yes we are different and rely on eachother to further the human race, and we must forge ahead to make sure we survive… and 1+1 is 2, got any other moronicly simple statements to make?
we don’t hate their inability to be assertive dumbass, we hate their passive aggressiveness that borders on phycotic in the manipulation and exploitation of our gender.
and using capishe at the end of an opinion is a passive agressive way of trying to manipulate your readers into accepting your view as fact, but it backfires and makes us want to back hand you for being an arrogant asshole.
natural selection, we educate enough men to avoid breeding with harpy’s and they will cease to exist or adapt.
your verbal masterbation does not fool us, piss off chicky.
sweet, i hope it goes up in LA, that way ill get to see it. just sent you a $50.00.
Why are you so ademate at blasting the opposite sex? I can understand why they annoy you, but I think calling men better than women is unproductive….
I think your motivation is revenge Mr. Dick. And although women enrage with me with their petty concerns, I believe that vengeance isnt the answer….
I don’t feel it fair to give slight to women, given the expectations of feminism instilled in them: there are strong women too, and on the frontier these were expected to be defenders and rulers of the house, and not too feminine to pick up a bow and arrow or rifle and do away with raiders, fighting in concert with men. However, men - the male, assertive, action-oriented mindset that is instilled in a human during fetal development by hormones - are a different creature than women, and I say long live the difference, as it makes for a system of checks and balances which is necessary for civilization. Men err toward the active; women err toward the passive. Together there’s a future. But those must both be strong, which does not mean a dissolution of the feminine or adulteration of the masculine…
So instead of hating their inability to be assertive, we cherish their inability to be assertive…capishe?
Maybe its better than women are the way they are, its not like they are going to change for us….
San Francisco is a smaller city, but offers the fantastic opportunity to piss off a hell of a lot more people.
Los Angeles is considered by some to be the second largest major metropolitan area.
http://www.neweconomyindex.org/metro/major_cities.html
-Dick