Happy Birthday. I Got You A ‘Settle the Fuck Down’.
Women are the only creatures on the planet dumb enough to think their birthday is an actual holiday. Birthdays are not holidays. Just like weddings, coffee, pets, and anniversaries that don’t end in and also are “0″; birthdays are not a big deal.
A woman once told me that I had to be nicer to her because it was her “birthday week.” Are you fucking kidding me?
Men are better than women at having birthdays. Men are so much better than women at birthdays that I don’t even know when my birthday is.
If the government required everyone to take a test before they could vote, question number two would be, “Is your birthday a holiday?”
“Like…it should be!”
Fail. Head down to TGI Fridays, you jokey bitch. Your meal ticket is on his third Jack and Coke.
Women suck at birthdays for the same reason they suck at everything in life. They’re annoying and full of shit.
Women are Annoying
I’m not talking about the kind of annoying I am when I go from a three-martini business lunch to an art gallery and sound like an insightful air raid siren. That’s called being mannoying and it’s awesome. It’s fueled by alcohol.
Women are annoying like a Swiss Army knife.
On a Swiss Army knife, every nook and cranny of the tool has a specific purpose that is designed to get the job done. On a woman, every single one of her behaviors is engineered to get as much attention as possible. Crying, obnoxious laughter, constant screw ups, make-up, boob jobs, date rape; they’re all unique female methods of accomplishing the same thing: pumping attention into their veins like it’s a vaccine for turning 24.
To a woman, a birthday is just another excuse to plant her fat, obnoxious foot in the unmarred schedule of your life and suck as much attention out of your wallet as she can.
Women are Full of Shit
No man has ever wanted to get inside a woman’s head, but if you ever do, follow this simple guide.
For an entire day, after every single thing you do, talk about how difficult it was but how you still managed to do it. If you got out of bed, take a moment to say, “That was hard, but I did it. Good for me!” After you brush your teeth say, “That was hard, but I did it. Good for me!” When you have a birthday say, “That was a hard year, but I did it. Good for fucking me!”
Women don’t have accomplishments. They just have after parties. Coffee breaks, birthdays, a new outfit for the gym to celebrate her second week of working out!
Women are so busy patting themselves on the back, they don’t have time to be useful.
Question number one would be, “How big is your penis?”
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April 29th, 2008 at 10:50 pm - IP Man-Hash: 1116c5effdf1d
Props!
April 30th, 2008 at 12:06 am - IP Man-Hash: fee8e56f5e83c
I blame the stupid mom. She should of beaten the fuck out of her .
wait, is that a single mother?
April 30th, 2008 at 9:06 am - IP Man-Hash: 21b6ef3e0a30a
^^^^^^ WTF?? NO! dont lay the blame on the mum, how about the snot nosed, shitty, bitch faced, spoilt bitch face of a 15 yo she has for a daughter.
God..is it normal, that that made me REALLY angry??
April 30th, 2008 at 9:21 am - IP Man-Hash: 5e3b0a85c96af
The mother didn’t give her daughter any kind of consequences for her ridiculously spoiled rotten behavior. The mom is totally to blame, she raised a spoiled rotten little brat.
If one of my sons did that to me or their father, there would be NO party, NO car, NO nothing. The only thing they would have to look forward to is sitting in their room that was striped of all of their privileges….for a very long time.
April 30th, 2008 at 12:40 pm - IP Man-Hash: b1c805e7bd641
Wow. This is what the modern child is like. This is why I’ll soank and DISCIPLINE my kids. Arrest me fo rabuse if you want, but they WILL be spanked.
April 30th, 2008 at 2:16 pm - IP Man-Hash: 0a074b6031993
I fear this, and other videos like these, are being watched by the denizens of Islamic culture, which makes them want to “slit our throats” (with thanks to SOTS) even more. Depressing.
BTW, the singer in the background ( Micheal Stipe, REM) is a homosexual, as this is being discussed in many threads.
April 30th, 2008 at 5:59 pm - IP Man-Hash: 984d2faf2ac07
God, who gives a shit - it’s a spoiled ass fifteen year old girl. Wow, these articles are getting really laime when you show a “sweet sixteen” video to prove the women suck at birthdays. All teenagers are retarded! You want to see a woman who’s birthday is a living hell for everyone around her, you need to meet my mother. Haven’t you all seen the teenage boys on these shows, there just as rediculous. It’s a show people; if it was a normal, nice kid having a birthday party at thier parents house, I don’t think it would get a lot of ratings.
April 30th, 2008 at 6:01 pm - IP Man-Hash: 984d2faf2ac07
OMG, that is IRON CLAD EVIDENCE!!!!
How no manhole! What’s going on?
April 30th, 2008 at 6:04 pm - IP Man-Hash: 8217966eacde5
Notin’, my dear. Just sitting back with a beer and watching Commissar Scott and , er, her, bitch-slap each other. Yea I know, pretty pathetic. Better crack open another, put some Cold Play on the stereo….
April 30th, 2008 at 6:13 pm - IP Man-Hash: 8217966eacde5
@Copstash- If you don’t know, click on the “Comments (RSS)” under Meta and watch the fights scroll before your very eyes….
April 30th, 2008 at 6:18 pm - IP Man-Hash: 984d2faf2ac07
OK, I’ll do that.
April 30th, 2008 at 6:30 pm - IP Man-Hash: 984d2faf2ac07
Ahhh, same old same old
Here’s my summary:
Anglo Saxon, fuck, Hitler, cheeseburgers, yankee, …………………oh yeah, lets not forget cunt.
April 30th, 2008 at 6:33 pm - IP Man-Hash: 8217966eacde5
Yup. Its pretty clear that Commander was not been raised in the US for two reasons: 1.) he says the words “bloody” and “arse” and 2.) hes not a very creative insulter. No wonder the US gets most of the Nobel Prizes these’s days.
April 30th, 2008 at 6:45 pm - IP Man-Hash: 984d2faf2ac07
Nice talkn’, but I gotta go. Try to get back to you later
April 30th, 2008 at 7:08 pm - IP Man-Hash: 3244d0d3a9215
is it just me, or i really want to beat the crap of both the mother; for raising a spoiled brat who will be a slutty whore that doesnt give crap to the society; and the spoiled slut…or maybe if Mr. T. does it, it would be a lot better.
April 30th, 2008 at 8:09 pm - IP Man-Hash: 666508dec08b7
Good observation there, kiddo. But I think he skipped cheeseburgers this time.
Bummer.
April 30th, 2008 at 8:24 pm - IP Man-Hash: c582593fbcdab
Who the fuck cares if Michael Stipes is a homosexual? What do muslims have to do with this? The point of this article is how spoiled and unappreciative and stupid women are and Dick showed a video of a lady-in-the-making. Is “no manhole” a woman adding useless shit dribble to an article with incredible implications? He must be, and to prove it he got into a scuffle with another woman “cop stash”. “No manhole” and “Cop stash” should go to the fucking nazi racist feminist websites they are used to frequenting. We don’t need your biggotry here ladies.
April 30th, 2008 at 8:43 pm - IP Man-Hash: d95284a9106fb
That’s because they are boys. No one gives a shit if parents beat up boys. However, I’m sure that if you had daughters you’d pamper and spoil the little bitches to death, and you’d let them have whatever parties they want
P Coderch.
May 1st, 2008 at 5:42 am - IP Man-Hash: 83a63482c144a
Did you read the first part of my post? I was saying the mother should have punished that girl.
I GIVE A SHIT if parents beat up their little boys. I love my sons, I would DIE for them and do whatever it took to make their lives easier.
They are my main reasons for coming onto MABTW. They are too little to voice their opinions….so I will do it for them.
Make no mistake, if I had a daughter I would NOT spoil and pamper her. I would teach her to respect others and herself.
May 1st, 2008 at 7:25 am - IP Man-Hash: 21b6ef3e0a30a
KEB NO! STAY AWAY FROM P CODERCH!