Fat Women: Stop Emailing Me
If there’s one thing I know about women it’s that whatever any one of them is doing, it can be done better by a man — and also they’re all crazy and they all want babies and they all want to get married and they all want to have everything done for them for free and they all want to fuck their fathers and every decision that they make in their lives is based on how jealous they are that they don’t have a penis and they all wear way too much perfume and they never listen to anything before they open their mouths with a response and they all need to lose 10 pounds and they never actually mean “thank you” or “I’m sorry” when they say it — what they really mean is “it’s about time” and “you should be glad I’m still letting you fuck me” — and they all love to be treated like shit because that’s what they are.
And when they get on the internet, they go from a size 8 to a size Invisible.
In other words: fat women, quit fucking emailing me. I can tell you’re fat and your fatness makes me sick.
Here’s a sample conversation between myself and a girl who is so desperate for Dick that she can’t even spell properly. Or maybe she was desperate for a three o’clock fixin of Funyuns. I can’t be sure, but rest assured this exchange is typical for dozens of other little fat girls who need to stop sending me emails every day.
Note: This entire exchange was done in seven minutes via a Blackberry.
Men are NOT immune to eating disorders. If you honestly think they are I suggest you visit your local psychiatric ward and have a look for yourself.
Blair
Only a fat girl would know that much about eating disorders. To a woman, a loose familiarity with a subject is tantamount to being a Rainman-caliber expert. I suspected that she was 300 pounds at least.
Dealing with fat women over the internet is analogous to dealing with them in real life. Who gives a shit about fat girls?
I suggest you visit a salad bar because you are too fat.
-Dick
That’s hilarious! You do not know me at all or what I look like and yet you say I’m fat? Well, you must be an overweight, acne faced, isolated, computer geek who should consider suicide to benefit society. You are the reason why many 1st world countries still encounter tall poppy syndrome and the glass ceiling effect in modern work places.
You disgust me.
Maybe you should come to my next feminist meeting? I’m sure you’ll fit right in.
Blair
I’m sure I would fit right in — their vaginas.
-Dick
But if you hate women so much wouldn’t you feel much more at home being inside the males you love? Keep making an arse of yourself, you’re only reiterating my points further.
Blair
When a woman calls you gay, she is challenging your sexuality for the purposes of usurping it for herself. She has become so hysterical with lust and overpowered by your massively masculine logic that she is as ripe for plucking as a big fat cherry that no one asked to their senior prom.
Got a pic?
-Dick
You cannot tell me that this heated debate wouldn’t affect your opinion of me whatsoever. What makes you think males are better than females? Why are men immune to low self esteem? I’m intrigued.
Blair
And at this point, I give absolutely no fuck. I also give the little piggy no response. But just like the little pig that she is, she can’t stop from throwing herself at the attention trough.
You hate women and yet you objectify them. You are incredibly intelligent. Now whose a constant contradiction?
Again, Fat Alberta will get no response from yours truly. In all cases, this is how women should be dealt with. If you’re not getting exactly what you want to the letter and with the excitement you so desire, stop dealing with them. The only “explanation” anyone ever owed anyone was whether or not Harrison Ford was a robot in Blade Runner — and what the fuck happened to Tony Soprano? Did he get shot or what? And no one ever got that explanation.
You don’t owe any gold-brick woman anything when you decide to drop her off of a gold pier; least of all an “explanation”.
Five minutes later, I received this.
Here’s your picture.
Blair
She also included a link to her MySpace page, which I will not include to protect your appetite.
Moo.
-Dick
And thus concludes today’s lesson on how to deal with women. They don’t think like men. They don’t have feelings. Women are just broken vending machines. Hit the right buttons at the right time and you get whatever you want. Unfortunately, none of its any good and at best, it’s past its expiration date by seven years.
Just so you’re aware, your comments, opinions and views are nothing to me.
You need to be hospitalized.
If calling people fat and encouraging them to engage in eating disordered behaviours are the only insults you behold, perhaps you should go back to primary school? It’s displaying your mental capacity when you degrade people in such an immature way.
Blair
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March 10th, 2008 at 12:47 am - IP Man-Hash: 4b8494f25ae28
She’s a bitch and a NOT-MALE.
Let me just send the ax down on her head:
How does Dick’s name, address, phone number, email address, or additional niches bear any relevance to any conceivable debate on this site?
I wonder when Joan’s asshole will heal to the point where she can handle a few more posts. With that size 6 bikini and extended thong usage, my guess is that she’ll be butthurt for a while.
March 10th, 2008 at 12:52 am - IP Man-Hash: 4b8494f25ae28
She needs to stay on topic or stop talking.
http://youtube.com/watch?v=8bet9BOptXw
A lesson well-learned.
March 10th, 2008 at 1:23 am - IP Man-Hash: 4bce5d2d02279
Boy, you need to man-up. You can start by learning the meaning of the words coherent and jibberjabber, you’re well versed in the latter but sadly deficient in the former. It took me several reads before I even realised your post was addressed to me….so…maybe you should learn to calm the fuck down and stop being so emotional. Women clearly don’t have dibs on ‘womanly emotion’ around here.
March 10th, 2008 at 2:07 am - IP Man-Hash: 4b8494f25ae28
Nobody gives a shit.
Fuck off, whore.
March 10th, 2008 at 2:08 am - IP Man-Hash: 4b8494f25ae28
Jesus Christ, we do not travel overseas for the sexually submissive women. We travel overseas to avoid you, you ungrateful, spoiled whore.
March 10th, 2008 at 2:16 am - IP Man-Hash: 280cee2b1a0c8
@Doubt-any chance you can combine your posts?
Interesting story about men who like to go “hogging” (ie hook up with overweight women):
http://www.clevescene.com/2003-10-01/news/big-game-hunters/1
March 10th, 2008 at 2:19 am - IP Man-Hash: c9ec626ba7d64
Again, I don’t follow your logic in calling me a whore, a man-whore, sure, but just a whore doesn’t do justice to my prowess. As for overseas travel, well this might prove to be a bit of an epic challenge for you seeing as you don’t seem able to leave the vicinity of your computer for more than 40 mins at a time. But I do agree, going away would do wonders for you, in fact being anywhere but here would pretty much set you right.
March 10th, 2008 at 2:27 am - IP Man-Hash: 280cee2b1a0c8
A quick trip to Bang-cock in Thailand would be useful for Doubt: then he could lose his virginity to a submissive asian hottie, and he probabaly wouldn’t be so angry any more. Just be sure to use a condom, young man: Thailand is a hot spot for HIV infection. You may want to have your dick check by a doctor after you return.
March 10th, 2008 at 2:33 am - IP Man-Hash: 4b8494f25ae28
Ha ha. No.
Joan the teen mommy already pulled that shit. Fuck off.
March 10th, 2008 at 2:36 am - IP Man-Hash: 4b8494f25ae28
Nobody wants you, nobody likes you, nobody cares. We don’t give a shit about your gay jokes - they aren’t funny. You’re fucking boring, you ugly whore - people go way out of their way to avoid you for good reason.
March 10th, 2008 at 2:44 am - IP Man-Hash: 280cee2b1a0c8
You lost your virginity to Joan! Wow! Excellent choice! “Are you trying to seduce me, Mrs Robinson?” Best way to go, young man.
Did you keep and show off her panties to the French club in high school?
March 10th, 2008 at 3:23 am - IP Man-Hash: 654ba2391fee0
Gay jokes? I can see that you are confused, yes, but I’d yet to say anything about that. You’ve jumped the shark, doubt. Only thing left to do is back away from the evil computer. Maybe you could call Joan or something.
March 10th, 2008 at 7:07 am - IP Man-Hash: 9342b2aa308e5
I can’t speak for Dick’s moderation policy.
I’ve been doing the rounds of gender based blogs and forums for about six years and have extensive usenet background.
Typically the non feminist websites don’t engage in that type of behaviour. It is mainly the provence of feminists. I suspect that given the numerous leaps of faith involved in adhering to the religion modern feminism has become do demand some purging take place to keep the heretics from the door.
March 10th, 2008 at 10:46 am - IP Man-Hash: 43c2d55198f31
@Gwallen-
I’m sorry to hear about that… what you said WAY up above. I think there is too much hate based on whether someone is male or female though… I think we need to look at people on an individual basis. There are some pretty shitty females out there… that is forsure… which might be why I seem to get along better with males… BUT I have known some pretty shitty males too… pedophiles, abortionists, rapists, drug dealers, etc… anywho… I am just tired of fighting over this whole issue… but if you ever need someone to talk to about things, I’m a good listener… I’m been through shit too and I’m a psychology major… bye.
March 10th, 2008 at 11:18 pm - IP Man-Hash: 9342b2aa308e5
I don’t need anybody’s sympathy or shoulder to cry on. I’ve done the things I need to do for myself.
What I want now is for people to be learn that much of the bad stuff men do to women comes about because of bad stuff done by women. And so on.
For example….
A quarter of child sexual abuse is committed by women against boys who have subsequent problems as bad as, if not worse than, female victims of men. Two thirds to three quarters of the men who go to prison for aggressive rapes have been molested by women in their earlier lives. Partly due to cultural blindness and partly due to feminist based advocacy the female offender remains mostly invisible, their victims are mocked by our culture and nobody - including the legal system - takes it seriously. Ever wonder why some of those brutal rapes of women occur? Ever consider where the anger those rapists demonstrate actually comes from? Feminism would have you believe they are typical men behaving as the “patriarchy” demands.
I said to you elsewhere that our society, thanks to feminism, views sexism as working in only one direction. Unfortunately a focus on only one half of an equation leads to half-arsed solutions.
March 11th, 2008 at 4:06 am - IP Man-Hash: a8deb0829f560
I’ll admit I didnt realize 1/4 of sexual abuse was caused by women… and you’re right, society does mask it. I actually feel bad for a lot of people in jail because as a Psychology major you learn that people behave in certain ways for certain reasons. I don’t think it’s right for either sex to molest anyone though. I don’t really pay attention to a lot of the feminist stuff though, I don’t go to feminist sites, take feminist courses, read feminist literature… I just try to see people for who they.
March 11th, 2008 at 4:23 am - IP Man-Hash: 4aba00bf66121
I’d be very interested to see the source of your facts & figures, would you be so kind as to share ?
March 11th, 2008 at 6:09 am - IP Man-Hash: 9342b2aa308e5
Try this from the UK as a starting point…
The Invisible Boy
I’ve accessed much of the research this lengthy work references - most of which isn’t online - and you should trust me when I say the article is conservative.
The proportion of rapists who have been abused themselves was originally brought to my attention by counsellors who work with prisoners and victims. My first thought was that many of the rapists concerned may have been lying as a way of mitigating their own crimes. When I suggested this the counsellors made it very firmly clear that they can tell the difference. In retrospect I realise that, given the invisibilty of male victims and female offenders, there’s really no reason for those rapists to make the claim in the first place. I went off to research it on my own leading to my finding the UK site I’ve linked here and a few others including the Australian based ASCA which I am shortly to become a part of.
Until about six years ago I was a borderline radical feminist. When I started taking a serious interest in sexual assault I learned very quickly how much feminist thinking has distorted the whole issue.
Most of the current advocacy and many of the services have their origins in the feminist rape activism of the late seventies(I participated in some of it very much in denial of my own experiences). That activism came from rather extreme elements of the movement. To many of them the issue was an opportunity to both demonise men and create even more chivalrous sympathy for women. They saw their demographic as female and therefore saw only male offenders.
Perhaps the best thing I can do is reproduce the guts of an email I sent to an interested journo recently…
Do with this what you will but I urge you to be very sceptical about anything you hear about sexual or physical/domestic abuse that comes from any feminist underpinning.
March 11th, 2008 at 9:01 am - IP Man-Hash: 60bbd967a6d59
Hint - you won’t find figures about this in Cosmo, Boring. You might find ‘proof’ that 99% of ‘all’ women had 1000 orgasms last Tuesday, culled from a survey using 0.00000001% of all white, urban, upper-middle class women… but very little credible research.
I’m starting to sense ‘uninformed liberal thick cunt’ about you, Boring… Let’s keep going in that direction…
March 11th, 2008 at 9:11 am - IP Man-Hash: 4aad97af48ec6
@Bored- Go be bored somewhere else…OK.