Female Tourettes Syndrome
I’ve mentioned Female Tourettes Syndrome in the past, and because it is one of the biggest reasons why men are better than women, I thought I would commemorate this Labor Day by expanding on the topic.
Labor Day is a very manly holiday, after all. Labor Day is why Father’s Day is bullshit. You don’t celebrate two Halloweens or two New Year’s. When compared to a day honoring labor, Father’s Day is redundant.
If there was a day dedicated to buying three times as much crap at a 50% off sale, or spilling fancy candle wax all over the carpet, then we wouldn’t need Mother’s Day.
Female Tourettes Syndrome is a woman’s inability to keep her mouth shut. It manifests largely in three ways.
Endless Fucking Questions
If there’s a stupid question about any topic, then a woman will imagine it and ask it with the confidence of Sherlock Holmes.
“I’m going to the store,” you might say. “Why?” asks a woman, stupidly. This is due to her Female Tourettes Syndrome.
FTS prevents a woman from being quiet and thinking about something before she starts flapping her scone-hole about it. Men are great philosophers, diplomats, and authors, because we can sit back and think about what’s going on before speaking. We can answer all the stupid questions on our own. Women make lousy all of the above’s for the same reason they make lousy lovers while you’re staying at your parents’ house during Christmas: they can’t keep their fucking mouths shut.
I’m going to the store to buy something. Why the fuck else has anyone ever gone to the store? To look around?
Endless Fucking Speaking
Women are like those tightly-coiled spring door stops with the little rubber bit on the end. You give them one little prod and they erupt with obnoxious sounds like a broken fan belt. Those things are fun as hell until you’re 12. Female Tourettes Syndrome.
The secret to getting laid is to rev up the talking part of a woman’s brain like it’s a bicycle flipped upside down. The speech and sex sectors of a she-brain are right next to each other. It doesn’t take anything more than timing to get them spinning like tops. Female Tourettes Syndrome.
Men speak in well-timed spikes of brilliance. That’s the heartbeat of commerce. Women speak like lawn darts: huge arcs that no one gives a fuck about unless it’s coming down on your head. Female Tourettes Syndrome.
Endless Fucking Complaining
No matter how good a woman has it, you’d never be able to tell by the way she talks. Women hate happiness. That’s why they don’t like taking their tops off at football games and why they like puppies so much. Puppies piss all over everything. That does not equal happiness.
Even if a woman married a millionaire and had ten kids by five different guys, she’s as far from happiness as an innocent man on death row. Despite that she’s living every woman’s dream.
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All the stupidness on this site is enough ,but what caugh my attention is not Dick’s bullshit but the little line at the bottom of every page “Men Are Better Than Women, by Dick Masterson is proudly powered by WordPress and hosted at LTTech 1,642,966 Served. ”
I can not believe ,company’s like that whom also powers big name like :Yahoo and CNN ,also powers this idiot .
I will make it a personal business to let them know how about this website ,which calls to violence and hatered ,and everybody that feels like me should do the same .
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It’s the way you are raised.
I know some men who just can’t shut up.
@ billy
The “No woman allowed” on the home page makes about as much sense as it did when we were four and had it on our little tree forts. No one takes it seriously.
Typical airhead.
You’re not the first to deal with such rubbish.
in fact most women behave just like she does. They are childish ingrates. She will be the type to fuk some guy when she thinks she can get away with it and it will be your fault. Rub like hell..
Kick her to the curb before she can steal all your assets.
women suck as people
Oh but you remind many of us of the many trash mouth entitlement whores who spout off the first thing that comes to tiny weetle mind.
You aren’t even welcome here and were asked not to post here but like most women you don’t like rules that restrict you from being a obnoxious bitch. You’re not worthy of being called a Lady. Go play with barbies little girl.
@ Anon
Might i add that you are the first guy on here who is actually willing to be decent to othr people on here regardless of their sex.
Hey when you find the answer for that question let this chick know because its the same way for some of us too. There are some of us women, myself included, that work hard to earn our own money so we don’t have to have a man pay for everything and are just looking for a decent relationship that doesnt revolve around sex. You go to a bar or a club and 1 there is nothing teenagers at most clubs and 2 most of them just want a one night stand. I don’t know about the rest of you but some of use are looking for more than just that.
Thank you Mary, for expressing your opinion with out cursing like a sailor who just had his dick bit off by a shark. A rarity for women around here, I must say.
Let me say, that to build a worthwhile relationship with a lady, one must be find a worthwhile lady. They are few and far between. At least, in my town.
I’ve looked. Hard. I know they’re out there. They must be. But I can’t for the life of me find one that isn’t already married.
Now seriously Mary, where do I find them? I’m not being sarcastic. I want to know where I have to look to find a decent lady. I can’t go to bars, because, well, every single word Dick has ever written describes bar chicks. I can’t go to clubs for that same reason. I can’t date girls at work, because that’s unprofessional.
So what do I have left? If you have any ideas, please, let me know.
The guys who find this stuff amusing are the ones I cannot stand. Looks like you don’t know how to build a loving partnership with a worthwhile lady. For one thing, you are not worthwhile men. I’m lucky enough to have a lot of good men and women in my life, and thank God none of you whiny babies remind me of *any* of the flesh-and-red-blooded people I know, like, and love.
Get help.
Heh, good one. The woman in my life, I clean for her. She gets three orgasms a week. I pay the bills, I got her away from her abusive father and her mother that would rather smoke dope and party than go grocery shopping and would rather allow her to eat dumpster scraps instead. Her complaints: I don’t pay enough attention to her, she doesn’t have a room seperately lockable, and we don’t go on a “special” vacation every other weekend, yadda yadda. I come home to having to do dishes and laundry because she was too busy pimping her myspace page and complaining to her livejournal freinds about me.
If I ever complain, I’m not being fair.
You people are just crazy about Canada, aren’t you? Come on! Stop hiding your love…
- Ida Corr - Let Me Think About It (Fedde Le Grand Remix)
@LBone I remember spending a warm summer in Ottawa once. I’ve never known three days to go by so quickly.
Seriously, though, you’re right about the leftist drones.
-wolfe
I came from Ottawa, and for some reason the schools there didn’t have uniforms. Or good looking girls. Just the lumpen offspring of dour, leftist drones.
Holy shit! That was some interesting info. I’ll never look at catholic schoolgirls in the same way again.
Damn, I rescind that comment. Makes me sound like I often gaze at schoolgirls; and this is not the case. What I really wanted to say is that you’ve changed my opinion of catholic schoolgirls.
My goodness.. I attended a Canadian Catholic school.
Boys dressed in dress pants, dress shirts, ties and dress shoes.
Girls pranced around in mini skirts and open blouses.
During hot weather the boys asked if we could substitute dress shorts for the pants… we were denied… yet the girls could all choose if they wanted to wear a kilt or dress pants. 0.o
The girls had a kilt pin and on it they’d put colored beads.. each color representing something they did… blue for oral sex, red for anal, white for virgin.. etc.
Gross.
Yeah, nothing lasts like a lesson that stings a little. I’ve also found that advice is only REALLY assimilated once you go against it; a once-broken bone is strongest where it knits together.
I was born in ‘80, so by the time I hit puberty the feminist resurgence was in full swing. It seems that most of the posters here are within my age cohort, so I thought that since I’m new here I’ll put down a bit of my experience with feminism, and see how well it jives with what you know.
This bullshit was pumped into our heads all day long by fat sexless cunts with Moe Howard haircuts, aka “teachers”. This of course coincided with the invention of date rape, the “sensitive man of the 90s”, political correctness, every man is a rapist, competition is bad, all that shit. Boys were taught to be ashamed of their sexual feelings, to hide our attraction, and made to think that it was the same as rape to look at a girl with lust. Our gym classes were went from basketball and soccer to step aerobics and square dancing.
We were neutered.
Well, what do you expect from a Canadian Catholic school?
Thanks for the advice, bro. It’s a bit late, because I’ve already learned all that shit through trial and error, but I still appreciate the words of wisdom.
This is a “wuss test” or “shit test”. It took me a while to figure this one out, and I’ve been “gotten” by this before. I’ll bet she’s scuttling from one pile of stupid shit to another at a weird, sped-up, 1903-silent-movie-gait, while you, like an ass, get to follow around after her. She is always watching you from her peripheral vision, waiting for you to get close only so she can take off again. Occasionally she will turn and hiss at you, giving you hurry-up motions like you’re a dumb little kid. The object is to humiliate you in public and to prove both to herself and any other woman watching (they ALL are) this ugly scene that she OWNS YOUR ASS. Refuse to play along. Women cannot take your dignity by force; you have to give it away by choice.
She could smell your desperation a mile away. Someone, at some point, convinced you that you were lucky to receive ANY level of female attention at all, instead of it being the other way around.
She decided NOT to fuck you as soon as you let her be in charge. She knew that you only went with her in order to try and fuck her. That shit when you got there was just “punishment” for wanting to fuck her. Nice, huh?
Never let a woman in the driver’s seat, be it literal or figurative. If you girlfriend says, “I want to invite five of my hot friends over so we can all take turns sucking your dick and feeding you sandwiches and beer” you have to be prepared to say “What kind of sandwiches?” If its one of those bullshit ones where they give you a 3rd slice of bread for some retarded reason call it off.
Women only think in terms of dominance/submission. Finding out when they are actively trying to dominate you takes a while, but it is worth it - you become INDOMITABLE.
Your time is worth more than that. Running around, propping up some insecure bitch’s fragile sense of self-worth
@ Banzai - you say “I had to go to the can to drop the atlantic cable.”
Ha! I usually call it the “toilet trout” - but only when my wife’s on the can.
MABTW
One of the many, many reasons I got divorced again was the endless questions (why,why,why,why).
Several Christmases ago we had family over. Everyone was enjoing pleasent conversation, Christmas music, libations etc.
My (then) wife was in the kitchen and I had to go to the can to drop the atlantic cable.
She actually screamed my name so loud that everything in the room came to a schreeching halt like one of those old EF Hutton commercials .
She yelled “XXXX where the hell are you”
My reply, muffled through the thick wooden door “I’m in the bathroom”
“what are you doing”?
Unbelievable!!.
This didn’t require a phi beta cappa from Harvard to figure out.
What the fuck did she think I was doing in there, baking a cake??
FTS in spades!
-Banzai