Katie’s Revenge? Or Man Revenge
If you pay attention to the news like a man does — and I know you do because you’re a man, then you’ve heard about the case of poor Anthony Stockelman.
Stockelman is serving a life sentence in Indiana, America for the molestation and murder of a 10 year old girl.
I can only imagine what would have become of him in a prison of women. He probably would have been taught how to knit or how to believe in Tantric yoga or some other bullshit where women just run their fucking mouths for hours on end and then give themselves a medal when they’re done. Stockelman was in a man’s prison though, so he was beaten and tattooed across the forehead with the words KATIE’S REVENGE.
It’s the kind of thing that makes you proud to be a man.
Women have no concept of justice; either making it or dispensing it. Have you ever seen the show Super Nanny? Not one single mother on that show knows what the fuck she’s doing and that is the standard fare when it comes to the household.
Let me ask you a question. Do you let the guy who builds your house decorate it? That burly man, man with the tool belt and the man ass crack? Do you let him or someone who looks like him tidy up after a party? Fucking no. Just because he built the house doesn’t mean he knows shit about cleaning or developing it. Same goes for women and children.
“But, Dick! On those shows it’s always the father not spending enough time at home.”
That’s true. I’m not going to argue with anyone who says men are better than women and that definitely says that. It is the man’s fault the little bastards are out of control. It’s his fault for making money to put food in their bellies instead of teaching them how not to hit. It’s his fault for setting the invaluable example of taking care of man business that makes him too busy to get some children dressed for fucking school. For fuck’s sake.
The point is no woman has ever enacted an appropriate level of justice on anyone who deserved it. It’s like women are missing the organ that tells them when something is cool and when it deserves a rubber-hose beating and forehead tattooing. That gland is either called the brain or the penis. I’m not sure which is funnier.
Whatever happened to that woman who molested all those 13-year-old boys? Debra Lefave? Did she get her forehead tattooed? No because women are cowards.
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@Female feminism overwhelmingly influences the law in many countries. The law annihilates the partnership. You’re quibbling.
No, decisions are not made in the best interests of the child, they are made in the best interests of the child, filtered through a legal, theoretical and ideological framework.
Which in your words is… feminism.
Have you been outside much in the last 30 years?
Ah, there we see it.
And that’s not remotely her decision to make, because, repeatedly, in millions of cases, women have been shown to be irrational, crazy, and to lie blatantly simply to hurt men. (Some men have been known to do the same). She’s welcome to present evidence to a court along those lines.
To boil your argument down:
-it’s not really feminism.
-well ok it is.
-decisions are made in the best interests of the child.
-well, ok not really.
-if the woman doesn’t like the deck even after it’s been heavily stacked in her favor, she can just do what she wants.
I find myself unconvinced.
-wolfe
You cannot say “feminism” takes the partnership away. Feminism is a theoretical framework and an ideological viewpoint. What you mean is that laws grant custody to the primary caretaker and this is usually the woman. Now you see that as a bias in the law, when in actual fact it based on an objective measurement of who spends more time with the child and who is therefore more involved in the child rearing. Judges don’t just look at a defendant, determine if they have a penis or vagina, then tick a box and award primary custody based on genitalia. In the real world of non make-believe, decisions are based on informed opinion of what is in the best interests of the child, it isn’t a magic show where you can cut the child in half and give each side to one of the parents. And when it comes to blaming “feminism” for women who do not abide by access provisions and who do prevent the man from seeing his children, well, I think that’s rather rare, and you certainly can’t blame a theory for that either. Blame the woman, blame her own hatred at the man for letting her down in whichever way she perceives disappointment. Or blame the man’s own actions for leading her to form the opinion that he isn’t a good influence on the children, thereby forcing her to conclude that she must protect them from him.
Peace.
Blogged here.
-wolfe
@ Luka: exactly. I pretty much agree that women make good parents contrary to some opinions on this site. I am fair. However, what feminism seems to preach is a solo-relationship with the child where the man is dispensable. This isnt true.
A man has the authority and aggressiveness innate in him to “control” kids better than women who do a better job of “nurturing”. For me, my dad is a good “controller” to prevent me from getting out of hand but its my mum who nurtures and guides me more thus I am more emotionally attached to my mum.
It is a partnership but feminism takes that away which is why alot of men are peeved.
What a waste of time and energy.
-Strength and Honor-
@KellyMac & Luka: Thank you both. Kelly, for moderating your viewpoint. I do NOT have a chip on my shoulder, but one tends to grow there when someone assumes the worst of me. Luka, for your balancing an unbalanced debate.
For the record, I don’t have brothers, nor other male relatives who are geographically present. My children are naturally reticent, and were horrified at the suggestion of being signed up for a ‘program’ such as Big Brothers. They hang out at friends’ houses, but the fathers in the intact families are rarely around ~ mostly they’re at work. The moms don’t interact with sons, either. For that reason, my house is the popular one, because I’m willing to let them make messes, listen to their music, and eat whatever they want, nutrition be damned. What boys want is a present parent. Mine have that.
My younger son is a Boy Scout. Both have learned to fish and shoot a .22 through that program, from good and dedicated men. I don’t fish, I do know how to shoot a gun. I don’t think they’d learn as readily from me as they have from the scout program. You can talk in terms of what is ideal for children, and a two-parent family is it. In its absence, there isn’t a cookie-cutter solution that works for everyone.
Okay, now you have made your intentions clear I see that we are all talking past each other… we ultimately agree on the same issue: girls and boys need both mother AND father as they are growing up. Role models of the same sex are also important. I understand this.
Mansvoice makes a good point here. There IS an element within feminism which glorifies single women raising children. Don’t get me wrong, I admire those who bring up children alone, when the situation demands it. Yet, we all agree it isn’t an optimal environment for children to grow.
@ Luka: You are reading things into what I said that I did not mean. No, I don’t think women alone will raise boys to be weak and unmanly. I think, generally, that parents do the best they can, and only a rabid man-hater would do that. (On a side note, my mother is such a woman, and I thank whatever gods there be that I was not born male).
Women and men take naturally different approaches to problem-solving, and life in general. When a boy hits puberty, he is experiencing things that his mother has no way of knowing about. We can read about it in books, we can talk to other men, but we really can’t instinctively “know” it. Likewise with daughters and fathers. This is why a boy needs a man and a girl needs a woman to teach to cope with these things and approach their lives in the most productive and constructive way possible. We all do the best we can, but it is absolutely optimal to have a same-sex adult mentor, preferably one who has had such a mentor in their own life.
The suggestion that both oldone and I made is to make sure children have that appropriate mentor. I acknowledged that in cases where one parent wants nothing to do with the child (which is usually the father as the mother generally gets custody), it is tragic. I also said that when the non-custodial parent is kept from the children by the custodial parent (again, usually the father and mother, respectively), for whatever reason other than the knowledge that the child’s safety would surely be compromised, this is wrong. Wrong wrong wrong. And unfortunately, the latter case is far more common than the former case.
Why, I wonder is it assumed that a complex problem cannot have a simple solution?
My mother was a single parent for most of my life. Thus she encouraged me to spend time with my uncles and my grandfather etc. Not because she was a bad mother, certainly not, simply because she knew that despite doing her very best; there are things that only a man can teach a boy. Especially since children learn as much through observation as they do through communication.
That is not to say that single mothers are bad parents, not at all; simply stating that a male child does not usually observe his mother behaving as a man. Likewise neither does a female child observe her father behaving as a woman.
Dr_Z asked for a solution, the solution was to find a male role model for the child. Not move in with some strange man nor abandon her child to an uncle. The answer was to simply find a male role model. Big Brother Big Sisters Organization or something of that sort. I did not say she was a bad mother nor that she was practicing bad parenting by not finding a man to raise her child. I presented a simple answer, that is all, nothing more, nothing less.
With Respect,
Oldone
agreed. true.
yep, it has to be noted however that modern feminism encourages women to take care of her kids alone causing the man to be estranged from his family. thats the problem.
@Kellymac - I re-read yours and Oldone’s post and saw no solutions, but more reasons why someone in Z’s position as a single-parent raising sons, “cannot” teach her sons how to be men.
What is the solution for her? Find another man to teach them something that apparently she is incapable of doing? Can you see how this viewpoint is basically communicating that all she can do is raise her boys to be “weak” and “unmanly”…?
Can you blame Z for having a chip on her shoulder over these viewpoints?
I think it a shame that your most recent response to her was rude and dismissive.
I wasn’t aiming my comment at you in particular but to the general assumption expressed here that single parenting is always a bad thing for the child.
That said, I do and have agreed that the best environment for children to grow is with both parents present, because children learn from both mothers AND fathers. Up to this extent we agree on this subject.
What matters is not whether someone is taught to be a traditional man or woman, KellyMac, but just that everyone is taught to be moral, decent people, and either gender can teach that.
@Dr_Z: I did not say to throw your babies out, good heavens madam. I would never advocate such a thing. Indeed the fact that you are raising a child or children by yourself is admirable. I was merely confirming what Kellymac stated. A male (preferably a relative) can best teach a boy to be a man.
@Luka: No where did I say that a single parent home will automatically produce monsters. I was simply stating that I believe that two parents are needed. I did not state nor advocate the idea that parents who argue continually are in any way beneficial to a child. I am sure that there are exceptions to the rule Luka. However, since we speak in general terms it would be true to say that; in general a two parent house hold, in which both mother and father are present, is best. I would appreciate it if you would not add too or read into what I say. I state only what I mean, no implications or intensions, only the facts as I see them.
With Respect,
Oldone
Z, I know it’s just an expression. I was using it in the same way. I gave you a suggestion, as did oldone. In fact, oldone very neatly summarized the problem, and the solution. Get the chip off your shoulder and read it again.
WTF? I simply found this site googling something else and I was totally put off. But now I realise that all of you have nothing better to do. I made my statements and I stand by them. I have a wonderful family that I am proud of. We work together as a team. There are no girls except for me so forgive me for being a little more “masculine”. Yes I was raised by my mother alone so fucking what. I contribute to society. I am raising a great little boy. I am not insecure in any way. This is the last comment I will leave because endangered species like yourselves are not worth my time.
Peace
@KellyMac: It’s just an expression, and they’re not babies. I would challenge the nay-sayers to come up with a solution and/or support for the situation at hand, rather than simply vilifying the mother in every case.
@Luka: Your words are kind and reasonable, as always (what are you doing here?)
I think it is a bit simplistic to assume that women cannot teach boys how to be men, and men cannot teach women to be ladies. I think both sexes learn much from both parents, which is why BOTH parents are needed in the development of a child. Children learn from how their parents relate how to have relationships with the opposite sex.
That said, I know a great number of men (and women) who have grown up in single parent families, who are people of great honour and integrity. Having a single parent doesn’t automatically make children into unruly monsters, it all depends upon the circumstance of the divorce or split (if there was one), the degree of involvement of the father with his children, and how balanced the single parent is.
I think a single parent, who loves his/her children and teaches them to be good members of society is much better than two parents who fight, and bicker, and create a battleground out of a family home. It is far too simplistic to always assume a two parent family is better than a single parent. There are clearly times when this is not the case.
Z - I am sure you are doing a wonderful job.
No one is asking you to throw your babies out, Z. You can only do the best you can. But it is a fact that most of the boys in this country don’t have anyone to teach them to be men. You don’t know how to be a man. How can you possibly expect to teach it?
@KellyMac: I realize that my question only frustrates the party line. SotS’ reaction illustrates that well; if someone doesn’t fit the mold, attack the individual.
@Oldone: A defeatist position, to be sure. I won’t throw my babies out with the bathwater, though. You say I “can’t” raise them to be men. Perhaps not men who would be welcome in an environment like this one, but I’ll do my best, and they’ll be the better for it. I can only pray that this website doesn’t represent the world as it is; where men shun other men (and women other women) for their beliefs and their upbringing.