Men Are Better In Bulk
Men are better than women at buying groceries and we have been since the beginning of time.
Men invented gathering for the same reason. We’re better. Primitive women went out, found some vegetables growing in the ground, and then ate and shat them right there. That’s not called gathering, that’s called Ladies Night.
That’s why modern women are always complaining about not being taken out enough by their boyfriends. They want it so much because they don’t understand how to take themselves out. Once they find some food they’ll just fall asleep at the fucking table. I’ve seen forty year old women perpetrate that shit.
Selfishness
Women are selfish as shit when they shop for groceries. A woman in the grocery store is just like one in the bedroom. She’s selfish as fuck and if you don’t spell out everything you want on a fucking list she’s not going to know what to do.
What else besides selfishness explains two emergency boxes of tampons in your bathroom and not a single emergency 4 pack of Boddingtons in your refrigerator? A woman may need her dirty womanly things at any time, but a man might also need a Boddingtons at any moment. Perhaps some man mates will drop by unexpectedly, or that movie about Steve Prefontaine might come on. That is a good movie.
Fucking Shopping Lists
Women run everything in their lives according to lists. That’s why fashion is such a big deal to them. Fashion is like being thirty and having your mother pick out your clothes for you every day. Although maybe women should do that. I bet rape statistics would go down.
If there is something that looks delicious at the grocery store, it should be purchased. You don’t know everything there is at the grocery store every time you go. At one point in grocery shopping history, salt and vinegar potato chips were brand new. No one had even thought to put them on the list. That’s when you’ve got to shop with your manstincts. You’ve got to snatch that shit right off the shelf because it looks delicious — maybe even open the bag before you get to the register and give the cashier a look that says, “Fuck you. I’m not five years old. I’m not going to spill a bunch of chips all over your precious fucking register.”
But then really try not to spill them. That could be a major loss of Man Points.
Broken Carts
Women do like 99% of all grocery shopping. The remaining 1% consists of alcohol and snacks — also known as social food — and is done by men. That means the general state of ruin most shopping carts are in can be blamed entirely on women and their shitty driving and lack of respect for other people’s property.
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I agree. I just don’t like hearing about it (Like ‘JESUS LOVES YOU ALL’ being cried out by twats near a bus top)
And if Dick writes a book, I want a mention :D. About 1000 comments.
@Necro I differ a bit. If people want a very structured, theologically coherent (though possibly quite wrong) religion that’s fine with me. It’s a personal choice.
@Banzai ha! More channeling of the 60’s! Now you’re making me think of Emma Peel…
@diamatik If Dick can get a decent book deal — and he may well, in the wake of people like Tucker Max — then, yes, he’d be an outstanding guest on the Colbert report.
(Heck, I think he’d be outstanding without a book deal, but realistically, they’re not likely to book him as simply a guy with an outstanding website).
-wolfe
You’ll have to write the show, diamatik.
-Dick
Ohhhh Dick, you’re so right !
We men are better shoppers than women. I did all or most of the grocery shopping (15 years plus) and can tell you that as a man, I have a strategy (I can get in, get all my groceries and cash out and be home and unloaded before most women finish taking a dump).
Now that’s organization!
I do make a list but again it has all the regular shit on it and I know man-stinctively where IN the stores those items are.
The only reason I maintain a list is because I suffer from “CRS” (can’t remember shit). That’s because I’m shell-shocked from many years of bitching and harranging.
We men have a built-in safety mechnism that protects our man-brains from the incessant nagging and bitching from women.
It all dated back to the caveman days when even then the cave women layed around and wanted to decorate the cave walls with fuscha and magenta cave wall paper, Flintstone furniture, doylies, bed shams and cave carpeting. When we objected, naturally, they bitched.
You see, we hunted then as a form of survival not only because we needed to eat, but to get us out of those caves and away from those stark raving cave women. They didn’t have “Monday Night Footbal” or many hobbies in the cave man days, so God gave us alternatives.
So you see, all those chicks that post here (female, girl, DBS, etc.) are the direct decendants of those raving cave women (not their fault, it’s in their DNA).
I believe in time, the CRS will pass and my memories of lingerie clad goddesses feeding me grapes will come back, If not, then I will need to include “Bodingtons” in my therapy regimine.
All that being said, it’s remarkable just how many women are out there shopping. I did it out of necessity, if left to my ex-wife, I would’ve starved to death.
Man can’t survive on “Pringles” alone.
I’m a renaissance man and a great chef and know how to pick the best meats and veggies.
I get it done in one shot, not the ex, she would need to go each and every fucking day because her seive-like-mind forgot to get this or that.
It’s fun observing people at the grocery stores, seeing the stiff nips over by the freezer section, watching a woman grope the cucumbers and fantasize (about Dick M. probably).
Sometimes when the store’s really crowded with women, I go to the condom rack and get the largest size (XXXL) condoms (ribbed for her pleasure of course) and a tube of K-Y Jelly, place them on top of my other stuff and just check the reactions of the women in line with me.
Nothing goes to waste though because I really do use that size condon (DBS, are you listening).
-Peace out,
Banzai
I was a bit pissed the other day watching Stephen Colbert. He had that woman from feministing.com on his show promoting her ‘book.’ Why doesn’t he just have a guest with some gusto and invite Dick on his show to put another boot in the fat arse of feminism.
It is funny how women find the internet so threatening. Not just because of porn (though it has its merits), but because us guys can communicate to one another now and compare notes about women and how they’ve been screwing us for years.
Before the internet, we used to send up smoke signals from mountain tops, then we progressed to using two cans and a string, but with modern technology, we got the internet, so the world keeps getting smaller and smaller.
I’ve been reading some female coments on this site lately and jeeez, they sound like dominatrixes or something.
Hey, wait a minute, now there’s an occupation for all you women, you can all be dominatrixes! It seems to come natural to you anyways.
All you need are the boots and whips to go with your bitchiness!! Yeah Baby, Yeah!!!
-Banzai
I’m just lawful evil.
:)
It’s just I dislike religions or cults which have views like what Dick has. He rocks real hard but a religion or cult should be a free thinking thing. Like buddhism. Anyway, I digress.
And I’d be branded a heretic heh because I like to practice Necromancy which is considered ‘evil’.
Necromancy was actually used in the olden days to call up spirits to fortell the future and there was nothing to do wit hcorpses and such.
i guess the men are slowly waking up and banding together…
i just had to quote you, you dumb bitch. “Ungrateful”? What the fuck are you talking about? We are the ones who are giving you your fucking rights. You think a group of feminist can give you your rights? Anytime men and men as a whole want the world back, we take it.. correction, we fucking seize it and cut all the feminist throats.
If you *do* read this site, you probably know that we didnt say women are useless. it was highly agreed upon that women are good for two things, sex and cleaning so stick to them. giving birth is your job and something which you do and want to do. its the same way we do our jobs of running the world… so please, just take your feminist ideology and shove it up your ass… and serve me a milkshake!
You read back to some of my previous comments you will know why I cringed at my own comment.
For some reason we seem to bee turning into a cult.
Prosecution? Bit harsh term for what we are.
I followed your link/name. What are you scared of? I am not a feminist, you have it all fucked up. I am a Dirty Bitch and there’s a big difference. A Dirty Bitch can appreciate a good man and respects her man. Obviously, you are scared of something. Is it feminists that hurt your feelings?
If you really did appreciate a “good man”, and have true respect for “your man”, you would never refer to yourself as “A Dirty Bitch”, except in his bedroom.
Ok, then. Point out 5 things with moving parts invented by a woman.
The prosecution rests, your honor.
@Dick can you email me with how you beat this spam wave down? What tools you’re using etc? I’m getting waves of 100-150 a day (nothing like that attack yet) and stuff is occasionally slipping through. I don’t think my present defenses would beat a concerted attack like that, and I’d like to be preemptively ready.
-wolfe
Let me just elaborate: She posts some absolute stupidity on our site and says she did not write it. And the other little girls have absolutely nothing to do with her, and yet are so fast to call out any circumstantial evidence their inferior minds find offensive.
Then again, they’re just stupid whores who are upset about having a vagina for the rest of their lives.
So basically she posts on this site and than says that she did not post on this site. Wow, she’s looking better every fucking second.
I tried to post to Abaddon’s blog like 4 times and it’s not there.
Is Dick responsible for those, or Wordpress?
Have you considered some of us don’t have blogs of our own or have discontinued them?
Such hysterical vitriolics on your blog, bitch.
- Jamelia - Something About You