Much Ado About Passing Out After Screwing
All mysteries in life can be solved by The Bible or through some scientific thought. Here’s an example:
Where did the moon come from?
From the Bible, we know that the moon is just there and wouldn’t you rather hear about magic apples and talking snakes? I know I would.
Science tells us that the moon was formed 4.5 billion years ago from the ejected matter of a collision between the Earth and a rogue proto-planet — except that the Earth is spinning too fast and is too large for that to have happened, so maybe it was two collisions or maybe Mother Earth just got a lot fatter after spawning.
Typical.
Why do men fall asleep after sex?
That question has bothered me for years because women act like there’s something to stay awake for. There isn’t. There’s only a forty minute monologue on childhood experiences. Childhood experiences that happened to a girl. That means they’re either half-true, half-cryptic stories of child-abuse or subtle ways of her telling you she could have been a model.
Men are better than women at having childhood experiences. Men have hilarious childhood stories that are as entertaining as they are inaccurate. Accuracy is for footnotes.
Evolution
The reason humans have thumbs and not no-thumbs is because humans with thumbs were more suited to survive in the wild. All thumbless humans died out or were beaten to death with clubs that required thumbs to use. The same is true of the colon: the manliest organ. The colon is able to take an unending amount of shit and keep on working. That’s manly.
That’s also evolution.
Let’s assume that at some point there were two types of human males: those who did and those who didn’t fall asleep after sex. Well the ones who didn’t would have evolved right out of existence and I’ll tell you why. Women are dumb as shit and also worse parents than a broken television.
Women are Awful Parents
If prison or suicide statistics are anything to go by, children raised by single mothers are violent, self-destructive maniacs with little positive influence on society and even less potential for personal success. If prehistoric men didn’t fall asleep after pleasuring their prehistoric skanks, then they certainly would have split in the middle of the night faster than dropping a pregnant anchor off a short pier. Prehistoric man didn’t even know “rape”, good luck explaining the myth of “responsibility”.
Last names and Little League had not yet been invented in 10,000 BC. Men would have had no reason to raise illegitimate children.
Men are faster than women. Without the anchor of sleep, all prehistoric children would have been raised by women and thus become suicidal deviants unable to reproduce. They would have murdered each other or killed themselves out due to a crippling lack of self-esteem before Evolution Round Two.
Women are Dumb
Women interpret the endless ability to run their mouths with no consequence as “unconditional love”. That’s why they’re obsessed with dogs. Dogs are the only creatures on the planet able to listen to a woman’s gear-grinding torrent of nonsense with no objection. Slugs and rocks do not have ears.
When men fall asleep after sex, women run their mouths like toothless chainsaws, getting nowhere at a steady and annoying volume and suffering absolutely no consequence for it. That’s when a woman “falls in love” with you; when you’re on your face trying to ignore a story that sounds like Peter Frampton has gotten hold of a dentist drill about her favorite drunk uncle who touched her inappropriately after a fifth grade fashion show that the Penny Saver ran a two paragraph piece on in between an article on gardening and an ad for Hollywood Chiropractic — which is also why she personally hates alcohol.
Once a woman is “in love”, she’ll cling like a charged up pitbull. Even a few knocks to the head won’t make a pitbull let go. The only thing that will is a tastier looking piece of meat or a fatter wad of money.
Women prefer you to fall asleep after sex. Think about it. During a man’s sleep is the only time a woman may speak out loud without feeling as though she is a big, fat retard. And that’s not our manly fault. When you try to cram a wrinkled twenty dollar bill of Monopoly money into a vending machine, there’s no polite way to tell you that you are dumb and that your salary doesn’t matter because the only reason you have a job in the first place is because you have a huge rack and you don’t admit when guys are hitting on you because your mother couldn’t keep her husband. In a way exactly opposite to that does an awake man listen to a woman.
The Bible
What does the Bible say about sleeping? It says that’s when all the trouble started for poor Adam. He went to sleep and God baked him a walking, talking fuck-up. Take a lesson from the Bible and kick her out before she ruins your paradise.
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February 21st, 2008 at 11:42 am - IP Man-Hash: fb1de3c77ad9c
Hmm, off the top of *my* head, I’d like to go on record by saying what a complete moron you are. Your example holds no value for its about the death of some male rapist.
So by the looks of it, it seems you are heading towards the argument that the more men that die by the hand of a woman, the better our society will be? That’s a woman’s CONTRIBUTION? Wtf kind of shit is that? Go fuck a turkey baster and get off of here with that shit.
Oh, and nice way of trying to get out of naming 4 other things by turning it around on me. I’m not ’sucking up’ to the men here if I happen to agree to what is being written by Dick.
You’re just too blinded by all the estrogen to handle the truth on this site; hence why you keep creating drama with the men.
February 21st, 2008 at 7:13 pm - IP Man-Hash: caac0597882ab
If by “pyschotic” you mean “100% correct” then you are bang on1
February 22nd, 2008 at 3:53 am - IP Man-Hash: 16c2c81949682
1) No, I didn’t say any male that has been killed by the hand of a woman, I was talking about a rapist who happened to be a man. does twisting people words and manipulating them feel good? and yes, it’s a contribution. Think of all the children she has saved from having life-long traumas by getting rid of a paedophile? Because men obviously don’t deem it necessary to put much effort into getting rid of people like that. But anyway, I was only being semi-serious. If you wanted TECHNOLOGICAL contributions, you should just have said so.
2) I’m not trying to create drama.
3) If you were interested in what women have done throughout history, you would already have studied it yourself. I would rather take the time to name them to a more worthy crowd. But yeah, I will do it sometime.
4) I really can’t be bothered to respond to your name-callings either, so if you would just cut it out…
February 22nd, 2008 at 4:08 am - IP Man-Hash: 4b8494f25ae28
Ha ha, no. We are always right.
http://www.menarebetterthanwomen.com/forums/about2921.html
http://www.menarebetterthanwomen.com/forums/about2874.html
http://www.menarebetterthanwomen.com/forums/about2367.html
http://www.menarebetterthanwomen.com/forums/about2299.html
February 22nd, 2008 at 8:20 am - IP Man-Hash: 45c996fd63e91
That was funny, I guess I do do some of those things mentioned above. I do like to wear makeup, occasionally wear my heals (not often with three active boys) and my guilty pleasure… tanning gel. Oh well….nobody is perfect I guess. I don’t think its too much about the makeup and such as to WHO is wearing it. I totally agree most are praying mantises tho!
I wish I could wake up and look as gorgeous as my husband ;)!!!
February 22nd, 2008 at 5:02 pm - IP Man-Hash: 3686f21e2f13b
You mean than in the time and energy it took you to type your usual monkey shit you couldnt come up with any half decent contributions? You actually have to take time and google a list of insignificant women who contributed shit to human history? A worthy crowd? What the fuck is that?
February 22nd, 2008 at 8:17 pm - IP Man-Hash: e24370fe2bb3c
Pretty much Dick, you repeated the same things you say in every post *sigh*.
February 23rd, 2008 at 2:55 am - IP Man-Hash: 59419be21c336
Then why do you constantly read it? For what, in hopes that one day he’ll shock us by saying some crazy lies like “No, no guys.. I’ve been tricking you all along! Women really *ARE* better if not equal to men!!” Pffft.. fuck that.
You know exactly what this site is based on, yet your typical womanly response is to keep checking *just in case* he writes something to YOUR liking.
I bet you’re like this at home too- your fat self waddling up to the fridge hoping to find your favorite flavor of ice cream in the freezer, but alas it’s not there. Yet you still check in the freezer every hour *just in case* that carton of Ben & Jerry’s Half-Baked magically shows up in there. Seriously, you must secretly love what Dick has to say or you wouldn’t waste your time here.
*sigh*
February 23rd, 2008 at 4:01 am - IP Man-Hash: 0e5751c917461
A group of fatties aka NOW.
February 23rd, 2008 at 10:11 am - IP Man-Hash: fc27b9c9da139
You’re pretty ambitious for a typical woman. Sounds more like you’d prefer a little post-coital monetary compensation and career advancement on top of that post coitus coitus.
“Every woman is a whore and the vagina is her business.”
February 23rd, 2008 at 12:52 pm - IP Man-Hash: 5c8336b56fb06
February 23rd, 2008 at 12:56 pm - IP Man-Hash: 5c8336b56fb06
@Commander Scott- and really i was just joking. we have post coitus (coitus) chit chat, and he actually loves listening to me talk- but i didn’t think anyone was going to believe that, either, so why bother saying it.
February 23rd, 2008 at 1:06 pm - IP Man-Hash: 59419be21c336
That’s only because it helps put him to sleep.
February 23rd, 2008 at 1:18 pm - IP Man-Hash: 5c8336b56fb06
@LadyXX- no, it’s because i’m not a bitter, negative cunt like you. i bet flowers wilt in your presence.
February 23rd, 2008 at 5:11 pm - IP Man-Hash: fc27b9c9da139
I am positively sick and tired of females such as sushi continuously boasting ad nauseam about their husbands and boyfriends in front of other men as if men and women somehow pursue similar reproductive strategies. It is evident even from the most rudimentary empirical observation of human sexual behaviour that physiological sex differences are non-fungible and there is little if any isomorphism between the sexual reproductive strategies pursued by both genders. No woman has any right whatsoever to condemn any man for acting instinctively on something that is deeply entrenched within his own genetic makeup and sexual physiology; blanket moral condemnation of the male heterosexual impulse on the part of women, especially amongst those who are completely sexually frigid, constitutes an invocation of the naturalistic fallacy and therefore a blatant violation of the principles of systematic logic; it reflects both the premature ossification and comparatively lesser volume per cubic centimeter of the female cerebral cortex, most often manifested on various experimental measures of human intelligence as a severe mental deficiency in both mathematical and logical reasoning ability. How does any woman’s ability to attract a man make her special, especially when every single woman on the surface of the planet has the same capacity to attract many thousands of men within the space of a few minutes? It is an established biological fact, repeatedly demonstrated time and again by the most rigorous scientific methodology, that every single woman in existence, regardless of what her actual personality is or what she looks like, can form multiple sexual relationships with untold thousands of willing and capable male sex partners; an established fact, no doubt, that finds its origins within the natural polygamous inclination of the male. Ipso facto, even women who suffer from severe nervous degeneration, IQs lower than cucumbers, full-blown psychosis, congenital physical deformity, HIV infection and morbid obesity can readily attract hundreds of thousands of potential boyfriends and husbands within the time span of a 24 hour day. It could probably be cogently argued that the only reason why any woman attracts any man at all is because of an unwashed vagina, nestled in a dense overgrowth of pubic hair, that periodically squirts menstrual blood, pus and vaginal discharge each month.
In the final analysis, no woman brags to other women about her ability to attract many thousands of potential boyfriends and husbands within the space of a few minutes because all women subconsciously know that every woman has the ability to do the same thing whenever they so choose. Instead, women, ignoring the tremendous differences between the sexes, target men as objects of vilification; as so many effigies of Guy Fawkes waiting to be consumed by the fires of all-consuming female rage. By Jove! One can still hear the vitriol of the harridans as it rises up from the primal depths of the unconscious. “We have boyfriends, we have husbands, but you have no one…” But wait! Can’t any woman do that? Don’t all women attract many hundreds of thousands of willing boyfriends and husbands in the space of half an hour? Doesn’t all this female boasting about being able to do what any other woman can do in front of men demonstrate a lack of being able to be an autonomous agent with a mind and a will of one’s own? Does it not demonstrate that a large majority of women are incapable of living independently or looking after themselves? Yes, my brothers, and again yes. Perhaps women boast about being able to easily find willing male sex partners within the space of 5 minutes or so because few women have the intellectual or moral capacity to take care of themselves…
I am votary priest of Nietzsche and my message is the message of the superman. Through channeling the will to power, we must transcend the absolute debasement of human spirit symbolically represented by the false ideals of a womanhood smeared with shit.
“All women are whores who run their vaginas like lucrative business enterprises.”
February 23rd, 2008 at 6:08 pm - IP Man-Hash: 5c8336b56fb06
@Commander Scott- holy wall of text! i wasn’t boasting. i was simply stating a fact. i really doubt that a woman who was retarded, obese, had aids and was horribly disfigured could attract suitors by the thousands, but whatever you say, you are the votary priest of Nietzsche, after all.
February 23rd, 2008 at 6:09 pm - IP Man-Hash: fc27b9c9da139
A woman’s chief virtue is silence. A woman who keeps her mouth shut and never says a word unless directly spoken to is the most beautiful woman of all. A woman to be prized more highly than pearls is a woman who guards her tongue with discretion.
As the great Friedrich Nietzsche says: mulier taceat in politicis, mulier taceat in ecclesia and most importantly of all, mulier taceat de muliere!
February 23rd, 2008 at 6:19 pm - IP Man-Hash: 5c8336b56fb06
@Commander Scott-
February 23rd, 2008 at 6:35 pm - IP Man-Hash: 4b8494f25ae28
Doing what you’re told is a rather underrated talent, I feel. People who can do as they’re told are some of the most valuable people in the world.
February 23rd, 2008 at 6:58 pm - IP Man-Hash: fc27b9c9da139
sushi, your profound ignorance of the fundamental principles of human sexuality is truly appalling. The reason why any woman who, to use your colourful language, is retarded, obese, infected with aids, and is horribly disfigured can attract many thousands of male suitors in a matter of minutes is because a significant percentage of the male population will stand up and fuck any hairy cunt that moves. Male sexual physiology was designed by evolution through natural selection to spread DNA over wide geographic regions; any woman who can be impregnated through the ejaculation of seminal fluid within the cavity of the vagina is an unwitting accomplice to the awesome reproductive potential of male sexuality, which could potentially lead to the production of hundreds, if not thousands, of offspring. Remember, it only takes a small number of males to simultaneously tie up the reproductive functioning of multiple females, automatically setting up a system of male-male intrasexual competition where it is to the benefit of a significant majority of males to copulate with any mortal creature that has a vagina between its legs. Unlike women, the male genetic pre-disposition to propagate as many offspring as possible is a life and death struggle and, for many men, often any woman will do as long as it assures one’s biological immortality.
No wonder morbidly obese Roseanne Barr has no problem attracting many thousands of potential boyfriends and husbands in which to select a partner from!