Women Hate America.
If you’ve been watching the Dr. Phil “House of Judgment”, you may have noticed that the first problem Dr. Phil has with my views is that I have a book to sell. Well it’s true, fellows and gentlemen, I am a filthy capitalist. I am a low-down, dirty capitalist who is out to make money by providing you with something that is both manlightening and hilarious for a nominal cost.
And unlike women in the army, this is comedy you can choose whether or not you want to pay for.
How dare I.
I would also like to note that my book is worth its weight in gold. It will teach you how to shut women the fuck up. Silence is golden.
Let’s talk about capitalism. You may already be familiar with it as the thing that brought you everything you know. Imagine Santa Claus with a school bus full of girls gone wild on his back, a Super Soaker full of gin in his hand, and a Viagra-induced boner that could win a home-run derby in the other. That’s capitalism.
Women hate capitalism.
Men love capitalism. We spend money on things we love, and when we’re out of money, we go get jobs we love to make more money to buy more awesome things. To men, capitalism is like jerking ourselves off twice at the same time. It’s a religious experience.
Women buy things they think they need, but don’t. And when they’re out of money, they have to do something they hate to get more of it: fuck. That’s why women hate capitalism. All roads lead to Rome; and all purchases lead to a woman getting on her back.
It was no surprise to me that on a show geared toward women, the biggest alleged “flaw” in my views was that people are willing to pay to hear them. That’s like calling Penicillin a “quack remedy” because it doesn’t grow on the sides of rocks. Just because it’s got a price tag, doesn’t mean it won’t cure your syphilis.
Manpitalism
Women hate success through hard work. They hate rewards for good behavior because it means none of them will ever get anything for free again. And they hate heaps of money falling on men with bright ideas because it means they have to recognize a bright idea in the first place in order to fuck themselves a place in line.
According to women, anyone who lifts a finger to help themselves should get a kick in the teeth and a placard that says, “Congratulations! You just adopted a thousand starving kids somewhere feminism doesn’t give a fuck about — or is there some other reason feminism launches bullshit ad campaigns promoting girls in science when little girls halfway around the world don’t have enough water to live?”
Maybe feminism just doesn’t care about black people.
Opportunity Cost
The more money you spend on the things you like, the less opportunity you have to give your money to women.
Economics — and capitalism — is founded on opportunity cost. I know there are a lot of young men reading this, so I’m going to give you a one sentence primer on money management that could very well save your life.
Everything costs something.
That smart girl with the big jugs in your chemistry class? She costs something. In fact, she costs about one zero more than the flatter girl on her right. Who gives a fuck how smart either of them are? That’s called an opportunity cost.
Women never have to sacrifice anything to get what they want. They just change what they want. If a woman is fat, she wraps velor around her love handles and marries poor. If she’s obnoxious, she becomes a lesbian or gets really into wine. Either way, women work in reverse. They don’t run the race, they just draw the finish line wherever God dropped them.
Take a reasonably hot woman to a bar and see how long she’ll go thirsty because a guy won’t buy her a drink. Fuck, light her on fire. She’ll burn to death before dropping six bucks on a glass of Chardonnay. Women consider any market driven exchange to be unsavory and beneath them.
Capitalism is why women hate strippers.
Lawn Darts
Women are like lawn darts. All the good ones were made in the 50’s.
To a woman, accepting capitalism means accepting that her self-worth as a whore follows the trajectory of a lawn dart. It starts in your hand, high in worth and full of potential. Then you chuck it in the air. Halfway through, everything becomes dizzy and confusing. Panic follows, and as the dart comes hurtling downward, responsibly is abandoned in the name of self-ass-preservation. Who knows where this thing is going to end up, but one thing is certain, someone is going to have to pay when it goes through the hood of your neighbor’s car. That someone will probably be you.
That’s called divorce.
No matter who they are or what they do, women always have the opportunity to whip out their vagina and rake in a quick Divorce Pay Day. That’s what it is to be a woman. Duplicity is your Plan B. Capitalism is a reminder of how much that Plan B is worth.
The Lottery Mentality
The reason women embrace marriage and alimony as if they were life rafts of shit, is because women live by the Lottery Mentality. No woman can achieve through brains and brawn. Those are manly things. Women need to win the lottery; a lottery like a rich internet mogul who mistook her insecurity for shyness and friendship while in college, or a TV producer who was coincidentally left by his wife the same day the lottery winning starlet landing on his casting couch.
Ka-ching!
Women cruise through life waiting for their ship to come in, and they hate anyone who doesn’t see life through the same set of opaque Chanel glasses. However, the lottery is not a form of commerce. It’s a commerce for idiots. The lottery is Sarah Jessica Parker to capitalism’s Nicolas Cage.
Women Hate America
Women hate everything that makes America great.
America was once called the “Great Melting Pot”, because a bunch of cultures from all of the place all got together and had sex with each other until awesome things like pizza and Brazilian bikinis were born. Women don’t mix well with others. They cling to their catty friends in little clumps and give all new comers the stink-eye. Little girls ostracize other little girls into committing suicide. That’s un-American.
If it were up to women, free speech would have its dick cut off and shoved into it’s ear holes. Then the playing field would be even and capitalism would die a slow, retarded death.
Money is how men keep score in the game of life. If you don’t like that, then you can take your vagina back to Venus. Money is manly as shit — literally.
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Your post says: “I would also like to note that my book is worth it’s weight in gold.”
If your book is worth that, why does it contain punctuation errors?
Try writing the sentence correctly: “I would also like to note that my book is worth its weight in gold.”
Once you learn proper basic writing techniques, your book will most likely be worth something regardless of its subject matter.
Just some free advice from a female editor. Feel free to disregard it since it’s coming from someone who is obviously your intellectual superior.
Kisses,
caile~
Agreed but know that you arent an equal. Simple as that. You will be treated like an equal but you arent an equal. Why? Political correctness.
The point is - If you are bringing up your achievements, I will too. End of story. I dont like to brag but if you wish to be a showoff, I will laugh in your fucking face.
Sadly you are inferior.
The school of real life.
Nothing, I just know that I am better than them.
The laws of women in action!
Actually, we are.
If that is what you like to think, go ahead.
Hundreds? Thousands? The exceptions.
No no, darling. Women’s fault such as yourself is YOU hate what YOU dont understand.
*Yawns*, making 1000 posts like Clair isnt going to change shit.
certaintly
well, you haven’t proved my point in any way
and i’ve said this before
why can’t anyone on this website respond without insulting someone
fine then, believe that we aren’t equal
but we are still human beings and deserve to be treated like such
Karen, why dont you get back to reading your copy of ‘Feminism for Dummies’? You obviously dont get whats written here and you never will.
Karen go suck a tit somewhere. You’re not welcome here and certainly not equal to man.
women suck as people
What i would have to say is the most hypocritical part of your rant is you listed your current achievements, while Clair did the same thing but you managed to put her down for it?
Your response to this is sure to be, well i don’t have to appeal to authority
well neither do we
just because we didn’t pass the 50 / 50 chance that we would be born a man doesn’t mean that we are inferior to you
And where are you statistics that women are inferior? personal experience? what has the few women that you’ve met done to you?
What mother issues do you have that you feel the only way to validate yourself is to put down every woman that you meet?
Every species, gender, and race has a few bad seeds, but you can’t discriminate and insult so many people
we are equal to you
some are sure to be better than you
Man’s fault is that we hate what we don’t understand, that is exactly what yours, and every other sexists case is on this horrible website
yes, i know that i have just said that this website is horrible and yes i am still on it, but i want to see how far your ignorance can be
Clair, Why does it concern you?
The truth really bothers you or else you wouldn’t be here.
Why did Helen Ready go on national TV to tell the world she was a woman and you should hear her roar? Why do women spend so much time bitching about men? It’s time women learn to suk it up. Todays women are worthless and they need to know how men think about them.
Why would Dick go to doc phil to promote his book? How on earth is it supposed to reach his target audience then?
@ Billy: He was being euphemistic.
Roflmao… You were talking about the female trolls here?
That is funny to think that one would say something intelligent.
You must be a real optimist.
If you’re watching “Dr. Phil” then you’re a total chick.
God, gawd, duh…
You are stupid because you are used to having society provide autonomous gratification to you. You don’t need to work at anything to prove your character, you just need to show them titties. Hell, you can lie, bitch, steal, and emotionally rape men because in your ingratitude, you feel like you’re hot shit for biting the hand that feeds you.
No. She didn’t get what she asked for. What needs to be looked into is what the fuck is wrong with this guy??
Fuck read his posts, he is mentally deranged.
” Might not be a bad idea to apply to the human race. ”
God…so are you.
As said in previous posts by me. Got what she asked for. As also mentioned in posts at the same time, rape is out there and you women need to take all precaution against being raped. Getting lashed out of your mind and falling onto a bed comatose is asking for trouble. The right or wrong of the “rape” here isn’t in question. It’s the judgement of the stupid slut that needs to be looked into.
Good job you don’t live in the animal kingdom, Clair. There, a male comes along, whips your male’s ass, kills your kids, then it fucks you whether you like it or not. Might not be a bad idea to apply to the human race. I know I certainly wouldn’t want to spend my time and money raising another man’s “spunk.” I tried it once. She had 2 kids and I had to look in the mirror every morning to check whether or not I had “Cunt” written on my forehead. 3 months and I fucked her off. She wanted me to sacrifice MY life for HER kids. Yeah…right….whatever…..next please.
Doubt - When have I ever made a small penis joke? and why do you have such a filthy mouth??
Anyway rob, how could you make light humour out of that passage? Have you read what that fella said? Like his entire posts…they are fucking sick. I felt like vomiting when I read them. He goes into detail about how when she went toilet the next morning,after not knowing he fucked her ‘as the universe designed him to’ with out her consent as she slept, she probably crusty crusty bits..or..errm…falling out she pushed her pelvic muscles…you get the picture. He was proud,. It made me actually wanna puke. But hey fine, you and mv hand him manpoints, be buddies and make light humour of it.
Suburban white girls are like the embodiment of the self-obsessed internet youth. I’ve read in too many once-reputable news journals about how ‘teenage girls find their body contributes to their identity.’
I suppose that’s a polite way of saying that teenagers girls today are more shallow and stupid than they ever have been. Hence we have stupid whores like you thinking that you know shit about what it means to be a man.
You don’t know shit. Shut the fuck up, we do not need the prick comedian here. We know every single small penis joke - 1, told over and over again like the stupid fucking whore you are.
But hey, don’t plug the sound-hole if it’s the taco talking!
I was talking to MV. The questions were rhetorical, fuckwit.
HAHA. Can’t stop talking to me can you? You give mv a lil speech then ignore it yourself?
So how many manpoints did you give him? fucking sicko.
Oops….typo alert….masturbating it should have been. Sorry, lack of sleep.