Women Hate America.
If you’ve been watching the Dr. Phil “House of Judgment”, you may have noticed that the first problem Dr. Phil has with my views is that I have a book to sell. Well it’s true, fellows and gentlemen, I am a filthy capitalist. I am a low-down, dirty capitalist who is out to make money by providing you with something that is both manlightening and hilarious for a nominal cost.
And unlike women in the army, this is comedy you can choose whether or not you want to pay for.
How dare I.
I would also like to note that my book is worth its weight in gold. It will teach you how to shut women the fuck up. Silence is golden.
Let’s talk about capitalism. You may already be familiar with it as the thing that brought you everything you know. Imagine Santa Claus with a school bus full of girls gone wild on his back, a Super Soaker full of gin in his hand, and a Viagra-induced boner that could win a home-run derby in the other. That’s capitalism.
Women hate capitalism.
Men love capitalism. We spend money on things we love, and when we’re out of money, we go get jobs we love to make more money to buy more awesome things. To men, capitalism is like jerking ourselves off twice at the same time. It’s a religious experience.
Women buy things they think they need, but don’t. And when they’re out of money, they have to do something they hate to get more of it: fuck. That’s why women hate capitalism. All roads lead to Rome; and all purchases lead to a woman getting on her back.
It was no surprise to me that on a show geared toward women, the biggest alleged “flaw” in my views was that people are willing to pay to hear them. That’s like calling Penicillin a “quack remedy” because it doesn’t grow on the sides of rocks. Just because it’s got a price tag, doesn’t mean it won’t cure your syphilis.
Manpitalism
Women hate success through hard work. They hate rewards for good behavior because it means none of them will ever get anything for free again. And they hate heaps of money falling on men with bright ideas because it means they have to recognize a bright idea in the first place in order to fuck themselves a place in line.
According to women, anyone who lifts a finger to help themselves should get a kick in the teeth and a placard that says, “Congratulations! You just adopted a thousand starving kids somewhere feminism doesn’t give a fuck about — or is there some other reason feminism launches bullshit ad campaigns promoting girls in science when little girls halfway around the world don’t have enough water to live?”
Maybe feminism just doesn’t care about black people.
Opportunity Cost
The more money you spend on the things you like, the less opportunity you have to give your money to women.
Economics — and capitalism — is founded on opportunity cost. I know there are a lot of young men reading this, so I’m going to give you a one sentence primer on money management that could very well save your life.
Everything costs something.
That smart girl with the big jugs in your chemistry class? She costs something. In fact, she costs about one zero more than the flatter girl on her right. Who gives a fuck how smart either of them are? That’s called an opportunity cost.
Women never have to sacrifice anything to get what they want. They just change what they want. If a woman is fat, she wraps velor around her love handles and marries poor. If she’s obnoxious, she becomes a lesbian or gets really into wine. Either way, women work in reverse. They don’t run the race, they just draw the finish line wherever God dropped them.
Take a reasonably hot woman to a bar and see how long she’ll go thirsty because a guy won’t buy her a drink. Fuck, light her on fire. She’ll burn to death before dropping six bucks on a glass of Chardonnay. Women consider any market driven exchange to be unsavory and beneath them.
Capitalism is why women hate strippers.
Lawn Darts
Women are like lawn darts. All the good ones were made in the 50’s.
To a woman, accepting capitalism means accepting that her self-worth as a whore follows the trajectory of a lawn dart. It starts in your hand, high in worth and full of potential. Then you chuck it in the air. Halfway through, everything becomes dizzy and confusing. Panic follows, and as the dart comes hurtling downward, responsibly is abandoned in the name of self-ass-preservation. Who knows where this thing is going to end up, but one thing is certain, someone is going to have to pay when it goes through the hood of your neighbor’s car. That someone will probably be you.
That’s called divorce.
No matter who they are or what they do, women always have the opportunity to whip out their vagina and rake in a quick Divorce Pay Day. That’s what it is to be a woman. Duplicity is your Plan B. Capitalism is a reminder of how much that Plan B is worth.
The Lottery Mentality
The reason women embrace marriage and alimony as if they were life rafts of shit, is because women live by the Lottery Mentality. No woman can achieve through brains and brawn. Those are manly things. Women need to win the lottery; a lottery like a rich internet mogul who mistook her insecurity for shyness and friendship while in college, or a TV producer who was coincidentally left by his wife the same day the lottery winning starlet landing on his casting couch.
Ka-ching!
Women cruise through life waiting for their ship to come in, and they hate anyone who doesn’t see life through the same set of opaque Chanel glasses. However, the lottery is not a form of commerce. It’s a commerce for idiots. The lottery is Sarah Jessica Parker to capitalism’s Nicolas Cage.
Women Hate America
Women hate everything that makes America great.
America was once called the “Great Melting Pot”, because a bunch of cultures from all of the place all got together and had sex with each other until awesome things like pizza and Brazilian bikinis were born. Women don’t mix well with others. They cling to their catty friends in little clumps and give all new comers the stink-eye. Little girls ostracize other little girls into committing suicide. That’s un-American.
If it were up to women, free speech would have its dick cut off and shoved into it’s ear holes. Then the playing field would be even and capitalism would die a slow, retarded death.
Money is how men keep score in the game of life. If you don’t like that, then you can take your vagina back to Venus. Money is manly as shit — literally.
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Not an individual man’s faults - mens faults. ie -the tendency to engage in physical fights, not being able to handle their own emotions, not being able to handle other peoples emotions, being self centered and egotistical ect ect. Granted not all men are like this, but it’s the equivalent stereotypes that you guys are throwing out there, and if you wanna you use the real world as an example (like I’ve been recently told to) then it stands true.
I am.
Hitler was man. He was an asshole, a complete asshole.
There now fuck off.
Fine. Ignore the scientific findings of your brothers, that you boast about.
About the manpoints, I’m sorry to hear you will never get that gold star.
You know, I find it amusing that all you do is bitch and moan about womens faults, then sing praises about men - ignoring their faults.
makes *men* superior.
Clair, I dont give a shit about all that. What I care about is efficiency, productive, capability and competence. The gender that has it is men. That is what makes superior. Source: The Real World.
You can never have enough manpoints. If you were a man you would understand, Clair. But you aren’t so just take yourself and the rest of the female population the fuck way from man business.
*D3C*
What?
there you go again with the stupid point system….once he gets enough points, does he get a shiny gold star?
Talk about a backflip.
*D3C*
MV - It’s not hypothesis. It’s plain and simple. You can look at images for yourself. It’s there.
Dazza - *smacks forehead* I didn’t say womens brains are better. Neither brain is better. They are very different. Men specialize in certain areas, whereas women tend to be all rounders and don’t specialize. Women have a better sense of how relationships and people work, men don’t. Women read non-verbal language better then men. Men are better at mathematical tasks. Women are better at creative, thought stimulating tasks. The list goes on. But neither brain is better. They compliment each other, where one falters the other makes up for it. It doesn’t take a genious to work that out.
Ownage. *dishes manpoints*.
Yes, I see the real world. I also understand it because thats what I’m paid to do. You see articles about how women supposedly have better brains than men or some shit, but you refuse to compare it with what actually happens in the real world. Once you do that come back and argue, or just fuck off completely.
*D3C*
Like has been stated, all that research is just that - hypothesis. I will only believe a hypothesis or theory after careful evaluation through several things like a) facts, b) proof or c) life experiences. Women did nothing worthy to prove that they are equal. Sorry, I dont buy the bullshit that women are capable. I have seen enough to know.
You too.
What? I never denied that your not seeing this. I said there is a world beyond your own, and now I’m throwing in that you see only what you wanna see.
And denying what is right before your eyes when you walk out the front door is beyond uneducated, its downright womanly.
*D3C*
Yes, it’s in it’s infancy. But that’s quite an infant we got there. Do you even know the basics? Yes, we don’t know everything yet. But the brain activity isn’t a lie.Denying it only makes you look really really uneducated.
Deal with it.
As Dakota Smith said I believe, that particular science is in its infancy, well and truly. It is you that brings science into the equation when it suits you, when the facts aren’t all there, not by a long shot. End of story.
*D3C*
You know, all you do is boast about what other men have achieved. One of those achievements happens to be science, this is the science you boast about yet push aside when it doesn’t suit you.
And MansVoice, please do elaborate on this conspiracy about neurologists lying to everyone. I’m intrigued…how do they do it? And why are they spending so much money on it? If they were going to do that in the first place wouldn’t it be more logical for them not to do the study in the first place? Gee, these men mustn’t be real men at all huh? Doing all this research, spending years upon years at Uni, all that money, all that studying just to make girls happy*tsk tsk* there must be an even more devious motive. It seems you have it figured out…Why MV? Why? :P