Female Mosquitoes and Female Women are the Same
Did you know only female mosquitoes suck your blood? That’s right. Mansquitoes don’t do shit but relax at home I guess — whatever a mosquito would do if it wasn’t being an asshole.
One, two, three and that’s it. With that last item I now have three reasons why women are the same as mosquitoes. That means I can write about it.
Women and mosquitoes both:
1. Suck your blood.
2. Hate “bananas”.
3. Never stop buzzing in your fucking ears.
I’m so confident in my man-race I didn’t even look up the fact that only female mosquitoes suck your blood. A man told it to me. I assume it’s true.
That’s how confident in men I am. I’m just putting it out there as a fact like that because there is absolutely no chance in hell that a man would be wrong about something like that. It’s science and it’s a fact. As far as men are concerned, that’s like having two dead-bolts on a bowling ball. The fucking thing is secure.
Women on the other hand — actually, now that I think about it a woman told me mosquitoes hate bananas. She was a married woman, meaning she’s smarter than women of the single, unmarriable variety, but she was a woman nonetheless. It was probably bullshit.
A simple check of the manternet confirms my suspicions. Mosquitoes indeed do not give a shit about bananas. Why am I not surprised.
It’s because women spread bad advice like they’re playing a life-long game of freeze tag.
“I have a problem,” says a man. “I have something to say that has nothing to do with your problem except probably to exacerbate it,’ says a woman, ‘which I don’t even understand because we women don’t learn words over three syllables. Want to know how I feel about that?”
No I do fucking not.
Gender across species is transcendental. Women mosquitoes suck blood; women human beings suck your dreams and your life right out of your neck. Man essence is easier to get at and more fun somewhere else, but women don’t go down for either of those: easy or fun. They only go down for money. Otherwise, everything’s got to be the hard way all the damn time. Being around women is like watching a broken Rudy DVD that skips and stalls before anything pays off. It’s just a bunch of work.
Someone pass the citron.
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1. Suck your blood.
2. Hate “bananas�.
3. Never stop buzzing in your fucking ears
Love it! Laughing my arse off.
Women in a marriage are like ‘that guest’. Allways turns up with nothing, eats all the food, drinks all the drink, probably steals something shiny, then fucks off looking for another party.
Little 12 Jaci, men taught Amelia Airheart to fly, we have also taught chinpanzees sign language, dogs to sit! We onlly have trouble with women because they worse than animals!
i’m a 12 year old girl and you make me SO sick! your treating women like dirt just because thier different di you ever think about all the things that women can do that you can’t!!?? sure theres lots of things that god made men to do and not women but women can do great things too! ever heard of amilia airheart or well like I sid I’m oly 12 I don’t remeber thier names! anyways you probably won’t read this cuz you probably can’t read cuz obviously you aren’t the brightest guy on this earth… but sereously actually think about all this stuff your saying BEFORE you say it!!
It’s funny you mention that. He actually didn’t say anything, he TYPED it. Try to not be such an ignorant, annoying little twat all the time.
I’m actually being quite easy on you (you’re welcome) considering the simple fact that you’re a female—and a twelve-year-old at that. Therefore, you know absolutely nothing.
If you have the mental capacity to do so, go to dictionary.com and look up the word sarcasm. But make sure to ask your parents first because you’re still a naive little child.
Female mosquitoes are nothing compared to the female common clam.The female common clam is a rut whore, a harlot, a true Jezebel!’Anytime anywhere’ is its motto, and it doesn’t deviate from it throughout the year.Frankly, I don’t know when the male common clam finds the time to adhere to the rock face.
But that most depraved of all effeminate invertebrates, the female starfish, is utterly despicable.The female starfish is nothing but an insatiable, limpid, screaming, prancing queen of the deep.Ohhh it makes me sick!!!
It would gobble up the penis of a blue whale if it could, let alone the minuscle gametes of male starfish.
My god, you are probably my most hated person on this site, worse than dick!
Perhaps you should go on dr phil!
My late uncle told me a joke when I was very young that says there is a difference: if you smack the mosquito, it knows to stop sucking. Crude humor can be quite a memorable bonding experience, as long as one’s life is not lived as if it were true. I miss Karl and hope his murderer receives his comeuppance soon.
Dick
Its true . . . only female mosquitos draw blood.
They are also the ones who spread a myriad of different diseases.
MENsquitos are better than WOsquitos.
Uh, learn your grammar Dick.
“It should be Female Mosquitoes and Female Humans are the same.”
Good try though.
“Uh, learn your grammar Dick.
“It should be Female Mosquitoes and Female Humans are the same.�
Good try though.”
Women are not human. Good try, though.
Today’s women who follow the feminists beliefs are human just physically, but less than insects.
My dad just went to jail after blaming me for his drug addiction, he went to his mother’s home and destroyed everything and tore the walls down while she has cancer and is most likely going to die. Tell me about this need to blame those who are often in subjection to man’s need to dominate? Why women have a need to agree with this behavior as their own fault? I didn’t ask my dad to smoke crack and guzzle vodka and destroy his mother’s home? It sounds to me men have a need to be weak.
Labia – Women can bring out the worst in men. They are actually better at bringing out the ‘worst’ in men , than bringing out the ‘best’.
Women naturally test, irritate and aggravate men.
Some men will react violently and some men will just tell you to go fuck yourself, call you a worthless cunt and leave you.
Example:
Domestic violence would not exist if women SHUT THE FUCK UP. Verbal abuse toward women would not exist if women SHUT THE FUCK UP. But women don’t WANT to shut the fuck up.
They want to just yammer on about all kinds of garbage that is simply untrue (just read Vagnolia’s posts today) and expect to get away with that shit.
If a man is violent, abusive or blaming you for any pain you caused him, you can bet your ass ITS GOT EVERYTHING TO DO WITH YOU.
WE ARE MEN NOT WOMEN.
WE WOULDN’T TELL YOU THAT YOU ARE A USELESS CUNT UNLESS YOU WERE REALLL A USELESS CUNT.
Your Dad wouldn’t smoke crack and drink Vodka if the women in his life didn’t work so hard to make him unhappy.
FACT –>> MEN WORK HARDER TO PLEASE AND APPEASE WOMEN THAN WOMEN WORK TO PLEASE AND APPEASE MEN.
As long as that remains true,
women should just shut the fuck up.
Menarebetterthanwomen.
Women irritate men to provide a reaction, which in turn validates their null existence.
Fact:Women always go for the deviants, addicts and other types of bad boys.
Too stupid to see their abusive behavior as the manifestation of weakness, instead confusing it with mannerisms of a high status male.
Women always have the choice and mostly choose the assholes to fuck them, then they dare to complain.
You tell a feminist that men are the reason behind all domestic violence, and she’ll happily agree.Now tell her the same thing using ‘women’ instead of men, and they’d start spewing their unending stream of ‘ill-logic’ to prove just how the opposite is true.
You can pretty much replace feminist with woman anddomestic violence with any subject ever.
YOU CANT SAY WOMAN HATE BANANAS…CUZ I LOVE BANANAS, SO DOES MY MOM, AND MY 23 FRIENDS, MY TEACHER, MY SISTER AND HER FRIENDS… JUST TO PROVE YOU WRONG!!
AND U HAVE NO PROOF THAT ALL WOMAN HATE BANANAS….
Amie, thats right you are going BANANAS.
It’s funny how God was able to leave little hints in nature for us men to carefully observe – female insects devouring man-mojo for all it’s worth. This is how I know he truly exists – he knows we men can grasp the concept of a scaled universe and apply science to uncover truth, and for that he created a universal non-truth to keep our man-quations balancing out… The ravenous female!
Oops I mean…… Thank you Dick, YOU’RE my manspiration. Dammit!
I look forward to reading this site everyday. After dealing with the bitches all day – this is such a relief. Thank you Dick, your my manspiration.
“Female women”… I’m hoping your intelligent to figure out why I think that’s such a fucking hilariously stupid term to use.
How does being a woman who is married make her smarter than one who is not? It doesn’t, because it doesn’t matter. Marriage is bullshit on paper. You said it yourself Dick, “Marriage is Blatant Ownership of Women”. Only a stupid one would consent to such a thing.
Listen you dumb bitch, in case you are afraid to read the site says no women. So what you feel proud with a woman president? America is much better than Ireland, we could bomb that place right now without any consequences if that doesn’t equal power then what does? You dumb bitch.
Succinct, yet a tell-all. Brilliant. http://www.blowmeuptom.com
not just spideys
I heard there is a variety of spider that eats the male after sex.. disgusting!
“Gender across species is transcendental. Women mosquitoes suck blood; women human beings suck your dreams and your life right out of your neck. Man essence is easier to get at and more fun somewhere else, but women don’t go down for either of those: easy or fun. They only go down for money. Otherwise, everything’s got to be the hard way all the damn time. Being around women is like watching a broken Rudy DVD that skips and stalls before anything pays off. It’s just a bunch of work.”
ARGGG too true. You can give YEARS of love, devotion, help, and money to a woman. You turn yourself inside out to please her but somehow, nothing you do is ever enough, and nothing’s ever right for more than 5 minutes at a time. And she is able to forget every-single- GOOD thing you did for her, in about 5 seconds after she discovers the seat up, AGAIN!!!! No woman knows the meaning of smooth sailing in a relationship-they will make up problem after problem (all of them your fault, ofcourse) just to have something to bitch about. Dont take my word for it, allow the refrigerator magnet on my ex’s to speak for what passes for Woman-logic. Her fridge magnet says the following: ” I didn’t say it was your fault. I SAID I WAS GOING TO BLAME YOU!”
What is up with HERstory on CNN? What is up with that shit? Just seeing the title put me off enough to reach for the remote so I don’t have a clue what it’s about, but it can only be feminist bollocks judging by the title.
You people have really got it rough out there in the western world. Trouble is, damned shit’s spreading east.
Yep biff, your his-story is correct.
Actually the Romans had that bit pretty much figured out.
If Sir Isaac Newton worried about makeup, we would all still be shitting in wooden houses and dumping it into the back alley.
It should be, but it’s not as piquant that way.
-Dick
Shouldn’t the title of this article be female mosquitos & female humans are the same?
Let me explain my statement a bit further. I’m not saying that men wont go and see the Da Vinci Code, but what I am saying is that men have enough sense not to internalize the themes of the movie and start debates based on the film’s ‘content’
We’ll leave that type of petty, shallow and silly way thinking for the other gender.
Actually, the Bishop in my sister’s diocese has declared that seeing The DaVinci Code will cause you to go to hell.
Well … actually, that’s not entirely true, because I had a conversation with my sister about it after hearing this pronouncement and then joking with my kids that while they could see the movie at home and be ok, they couldn’t see it here without going to hell, and that didn’t make sense to me.
My sister explained that the Bishop had decreed that Catholics who saw the movie imperiled their immortal soul and were therefore forbidden from viewing it. The offense that would send them to hell wasn’t seeing the movie, but violating the Bishop’s directive to not see it.
Personally, I think the Catholic Church does a disservice when it so much as acknowledges a movie like this or The Last Temptation of Christ. I went to both movies not out of any burning desire to see them, but out of a desire to see what the fuss was all about. Particularly in the case of Last Temptation (which is one of the worst movies ever made from any perspective), I’d've never even considered seeing it if I didn’t have to cross picket lines to do so. While DaVinci is a generally mediocre action flick, I doubt I’d've spent money to see it in a theater without the Catholic Church having first hyped it beyond reason.
Last Temptation is just crap, and if the Church had ignored it, about five people would have seen it. DaVinci wouldn’t have attracted anything like a big crowd and would have been one of Tom Hanks’ few flops.
The Da Vinci Code is just a fictional book/movie. It is written by a great big mangina, Dan Brown. By twisting some facts into an amazing amount of bullshit, he tries to make women feel like it was some great conspiracy as to why they aren’t as good as men by putting the blame on the catholic church.
The whole book/movie is as insightful as a Dr. Seuss poem. I guess that he will get laid a lot because of writing this fairy-tale.
And one last point … it is said that da Vinci was a flaming faggot. He was also born in 1452. I just dont understand why Brown is making a fuss over a painting that a homosexual made in 1498 depicting the last supper. Of course there will be a lot of noise by stupid people who are intrigued by the book (because they are stupid). da Vinci was born about 1400 years after Christ died.
If Picasso, in the 20th century, made a painting with Moses wearing a pair of Birkenstocks, should we then assume that Jews had the technology to time travel, but that is was covered up by Rabbis for thousands of years so that they alone can enjoy the fruits of the future?
Men will do as the Prelature of the Holy Cross and Opus Dei does when it comes to the da Vinci Code … IGNORE IT. It is a piece of fiction, nothiing more.
Has some latin in there I got to give it to the ladies… or manginas.
ok being new to this web site i would like to say that it really brightens up my day, i like pixies idea of comming to irland as being from the uk i know theres nothing better than an irish girl. ;) and abandon, what is it with strengh and honor??
looking at some of the topics we seen to have covered and i am sorry to say i have missed (ie Every woman is a cheating whore) it begs the question of…. were you born from a man?? or was your mother a whore?? please dont take offence as it is your topic i highlight the EVERY woman bit, i mean to say the every bit must be wrong as my mother has only ever been with my old man and i sure your old dear is just as sweet, ergo not every woman is a whore so your post are shown to be faulty, Faulty as in wrong and dare i say it pointless??
what do you ladies think??
What are your opinions of the Da Vinci Code?
It’s definitely a telling point Dick. Strange how the female is the only one that sucks the life out of people in both species.
Strength and Honor
Although to be fair to the female mosquitoes (from what I remember of my biology classes back in the days) they only suck your blood to provide the right nutrients to their offsprings, so it’s technically education, or at least caring for your kids. So in fact, female mosquitoes are superior to female humans (at least going on a certain MABTW person’s recent experiences with his ex). If indeed “human” is the word to use…
I watched the UK version of the Beauty and the Geek lately and was surprised at how incredibly stupid and ignorant the women were. I think my little brother when he was about 5 years old knew more than them, thought faster and more logically, threw less tantrums and of course learnt much quicker. The questions were of course biased towards the women. I.e. a woman would get some incredibly easy question like “name 4 planets in the solar system” (which they still managed to fuck up) whilst the guys were asked to name the celebrity that went on the front page of Vogue or something in October 2000 because she was wearing a low cut green dress (and to his credit, the guy remembered… astonishing).
Jesus,man,what kinda women do you know?Loads of the guys from where I’m from drop outta school cos they can’t hack it,they’re the ones who cant say words over 3 syllables!!!!!!!!!!!!
And tell me how,exactly,do women ’suck out a man’s dreams’?????If a particular woman does that to the man,why dosn’t the man leave the women???(by the way it’s the same vice versa…if not more so)
Come to Ireland…..and then maybe you’ll also see that women don’t hate sex.HA,i dunno where ya got that one Dick!!!!!!!Oh yeah,probably from your past partners.When’s the last time you had sex,Dickieeee?
Oh,and our president is female and smart.Our country is doin fuckin deadly!
Where are you from???America?
Damn, I just checked Wikipedia and you’re absolutely right, Dick:
“Mosquitos are principally nectar feeders with only the females requiring a meal of blood.”
Damn. So if we want to rid the world of a distracting, painful pest that can also be a carrier of disease, we need do only one thing: eradicate the females, or at least reduce their numbers dramatically.
Hm … I envision laboratory projects to produce a strain of that will produce female offspring one time in a thousand, then releasing that strain into the wild …