Female Oppression: More Monkey Shit
At any moment, a woman can say something completely stupid about something completely obvious. Women have an infinity of wrong inside them. Much in the same way that a child has an infinity of imagination inside it, or a tube of super glue contains an infinity of practical jokes.
Women contain an Infinity of Wrong.
For example, when told that no one gives a fuck about three fat secretaries bickering over an unloaded printer, a woman might call you rude or a jerk. This is completely stupid and wrong of her — and it is very likely fat of her as well. No one gives a fuck about three fat secretaries. Pretending anyone does is childish and insulting to good stories.
Here’s another example: women are worthless in science.
Women’s involvement in scientific progress has been less than a pittance of shit. If you ever tell an educated woman that, she will comb the depths of her Infinity of Wrong to spout something incredibly stupid.
Women haven’t discovered shit because we were oppressed!
Obviously, the only correct answer a woman can give when told something by a man is “how high”, “how long”, or “how young?” An explanation is like a woman’s Joker. It shouldn’t even be in the deck.
Women wouldn’t know real oppression if it walked up and smacked them on the ass. And that’s exactly what women think oppression is. Women have dreamed up a history in their little heads where women were politely coddled out of the laboratory and into the kitchen and that’s what they call oppression. That’s why they didn’t invent or discover shit; because of rebuke.
Men have been burned alive for science.
The fact is, men have been the real victims of oppression throughout history, not women. Men have been oppressed for their brilliance in math. Men have been punished for their innovations in science. Men have been drowned, stabbed, burned, tortured, and killed just for picking up a piece of chalk instead of a frying pan and a birth control test. Women can all go fuck off.
Hippasus - killed for discovering irrational numbers.
Archimedes - killed for doing math during the Roman invasion.
Giordano Bruno - burned for scientific astronomical heresy.
Galileo - imprisoned for discovering the Earth revolved around the sun.
Alan Turing - murdered for scientific prominence.
Einstein - forced out of Germany for being a smart Jew.
These men gave of their minds not because of fame or glory. They gave because men suffer from a condition that makes us give despite the consequences — despite oppression. This condition is called Competence, and it’s something women wouldn’t know about even if it came with the lowest APR in history. As if any woman knows what an APR is.
Women haven’t succeeded in science not because they’ve been oppressed, but because absolutely any woman in history except the very ugliest of the fugliest could put down her calculator whenever she wanted, pick up her dress, put her back on a mattress, and let oppression roar above her head like the man-train it is.
Women are cheap magicians performing in high school auditoriums with poorly-concealed, vaginal trapdoors always less than a step away. You could give a woman a pony for learning fractions, but the only thing she’s going to learn is how to give a hand job. I’ve probably just “oppressed” a dozen girls out of learning fractions.
Hippasus
Archimedes
Galileo
Giordano Bruno
Alan Turing
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Marie Curie didn’t do anything that Pierre didn’t tell her to. That’s why she’s so famous.
What a great role model for Western women.
Excellent article Dick. Women wont know what is oppression even if it hit them in their face! I salute you sir!
Every time I watch Ellen, Oprah, or the tyra Banks show I want women to get the fuck back in the kitchen and only open their mouths for my dick.
Well said sir. They’re not oppressed, especially today, they’re just retarded, annoying, and care more about lipstick than building a rocket ships to mars like us cowboys would just because we’re bored.
And you’re right about the pretty girls. Absolutely none of them takes school seriously because they know they can marry a rich guy.
Thats the best one yet Dick. I couldnt agree more.
What excites me is how defensive women get when you question thier beliefs and motivations, that’s a sure sign of a defective ideology.
Said it before and I’ll say it again - throughout history, women who wanted to do things, did them. Women who wanted to get married, have kids and take care of a family, did.
Now they just want to sit on their asses and do nothing, so they cry oppression (or abuse or anything else that will cause them to get their way)
The fact that most women chose the get married, raise a family route does not mean they were oppressed.
Unless they were oppressing themselves.
Oppression haha. Everything for a woman is an act, straight out of “boobywood”. They live their everyday like they are in a movie or tv show such as Friends where people live in huge flats, dressed like popes while doing nothing all day. Oppression to them is the fact that they can’t live life on pretending only, by just knowing the good phrase at the right time they’d have guessed from that script they didn’t learn nor read - as they want to change the rules whenever they feel like - it’s the fact that you have to learn or earn what you own/know and not just simply be pretty, enter Intel’s lab and draw the next supercomputer without even a ruler, magic inside! Oppression to them is just life out of laziness.
Hahaha, I love this paragraph:
“Women haven’t succeeded in science not because they’ve been oppressed, but because absolutely any woman in history except the very ugliest of the fugliest could put down her calculator whenever she wanted, pick up her dress, put her back on a mattress, and let oppression roar above her head like the man-train it is.”
That is so fucking good. You have talent sir.
“Women haven’t succeeded in science not because they’ve been oppressed, but because absolutely any woman in history except the very ugliest of the fugliest could put down her calculator whenever she wanted, pick up her dress, put her back on a mattress, and let oppression roar above her head like the man-train it is.”
Best part of the whole thing, in my opinion… well, not as good as the facts of men and science, but the best part that points out women are dumb.
“Women wouldn’t know real oppression if it walked up and smacked them on the ass. And that’s exactly what women think oppression is.”
I never figured out what was so horrible about screwing and shutting the fuck up. Hell, any self-respecting human would love the opportunity to sit on their ass all day, and only be required to fuck on command. But women are above that. Women WANT the opportunity to show their worth.
Of course, women don’t actually want to work. They just want the option to fuck off and do nothing anywhere they please.
Oppression. Pffft.
Either that or they fuck up catastrophically when attempting a scientific based activity. Marie Curie died of radiation poisoning because she was an idiot, and also mooched off her husband. He probably told her the shit wasn’t radioactive to get rid of her.
*D3C*