No Fat Chicks
A bunch of fatties got together recently and didn’t watch TV, didn’t throw back any pints, and didn’t injure their ACL’s in mantastic feats of weekend warriorism. What they did do was watch boring TV (most likely), talk about how much having “curves” defines them more than their shitty collection of porcelain cats (most definitely), and sweat gravy.
Yes that’s right, this bunch of porkers were women. Guess what they also did.
They invented the scholastic discipline of Fat Studies. What in the fuck?
What the fuck is the difference between Fat Studies and Women’s Studies? Don’t tell me it’s a study so nice they named it twice, like they seem to have done with eating and dessert. Also, don’t give me any bullshit about obesity being a universal problem. Men don’t have a problem with being fat.
That’s why we men invented money. So we’d still look attractive as shit with a hundred extra man pounds swinging around our skeletons. After all, sometimes a man needs to be fat. We all know it. Gravity herself isn’t enough to hold a man of proper brilliance against the face of this earth. Without a heaping helping of man love handles for her to grab hold of, a man of lesser stature and weight would go flinging off into space next time the world took a sharp corner. Gravity is a woman and I don’t care how much of that metaphor works.
Louie Anderson gets laid and he’s fat and ugly. What the fuck does Fat Studies have to say about that? Probably something stupid. Here’s how I know. Let me present the cast of players in the emerging field of Fatnomics:
Sheana Director
Stefanie Snider
Sondra Solovay
Marilyn Wann
Esther Rothblum
Susan Koppelman
Don’t Sheana Director’s name fool you; they’re all woman.
Are you fucking kidding me with this? You might be, but The New York Times, who have taken notice of this lethargic and jelly-filled movement, are not.
There is no difference between Women’s Studies and Fat Studies. That’s why I said it in the first place. I’m a man and my words are worth valuable moments of my man time. I don’t waste either. Being enormously fat is just women’s nesting instinct run horribly amok on an unsuspecting buffet. Those big, beautiful women going to town on Cheesecake like they’re tornados and raspberry starch is the farm from the Wizard of Oz — hording gobs of jelly like chipmunks stuffing nuts into their cheeks? That’s called being a woman. Just ask them. Real women have curves. Don’t tell me you didn’t see that horseshit movie.
Well I didn’t because I’m a man and I see movies like Lord of War and all the Fast And Furious ones back to back. Fuck, I’m thinking of seeing a movie right now and if I do, I’ll tell you what it won’t be about. It won’t be called Impotent Herman Works Out His Issues, because I’m a man and if I’m going to be spending my man time in some make-believe world where people have snappy come-backs all the time and no one got Herpes from anyone, it’s going to fucking inspire me. I’m a man and that’s what men look for in everything. Inspiration.
I’ll conclude with a question for — no I take that back. I present this as my doctoral thesis in the study of Fatology and Fatness:
What is the difference between a rapist and a hugely fat woman?
There isn’t one.
Make sure you print that degree on some expensive fucking paper.
Edit by Dick: Thanks to wolfe who brought this disaster to my attention in the Man Forums.
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I hate it when whales use the word “curvy” to describe themselves. A rose by any other name still looks like shit.
Guys use it as an insult towards women, and some of them use it to compliment us. It’s very fucking confusing and it wouldn’t be if they didn’t use that word in the fucking first place.
Did you ever notice that some of those supposed statues of “mother goddesses” look like obese women? Modern day feminists weren’t the first to engage in “fat studies”.
Can someone misuse that personal information about you? Geeze, I feel like you just told me your driver’s license number! Next thing you know, some old wino will be trying to check themselves in at the V.A. hospital.
I have a question for you, please (what, being an official military person and all):
I find it very bizarre that civilian women are all going berzerk w/ physical training. Not that exercise is not desirable and healthy for all, but there’s something about it that strikes me that they are in ‘auto-pilot’. Who’s weird little army are they being turned into (in light of the sucess of ‘The Communist Manifesto)? The neighborhood gets to feeling like a Chinese prison, or reform camp, or something. Also-this type doesn’t look like a toned hootie queen, she looks like a gaunt Asian guy. You can diss me off as a jackass if you’d like-but I’ve seen too much to not call it a trend.
Well, you learn something new and shocking everyday. I saw something interesting; a team of draft horses out in front of my car. I saw their butts, mostly. Reminded me of the grocery store on Saturday morning. “Pull, pull, haul, haul…tote, tote.” Endomorphs got loads of pity from Richard Simmons-(he was a dude, right?). He tried. Upbringing is what makes females want to drowned their sorrows in Mother Hostess-it’s self-pity and “where’s my mommy?”. They actually need lots of love and care and affection (like horses), but you just want to vomit on them instead.
Brilliant asshole, now you’re really asking to get hurt
An half-day of my time is worth more than your life.
so, you’ve just totally given up on ever being laid without using money as incentive? thats sort of tragic.
QUOTE - “Fat scholars believe they are serving justice and many hope that one day fat studies will be as ubiquitous on campus as Shakespeare.”
Hmm.
I don’t know whether to laugh or feel sorry for these deluded “Fat scholars”.
HAAAHAAAHAAAAHAAAAHAAAHAAAHAAAHAAA
AHAAAHAAAHAAAHAAA
.
.
sure they do, sweetie
AHAAAHAAAAAHAAAAHAAAAAHAAAAHAAAAA
I think you’ve answered your own question quite nicely.
Best site ever, Dick Godbless your soul cause you know he wouldn’t a womens.
Telling the truth to women won’t get you laid. Your friend was getting laid I’m sure. But how would you know that he pretended to respect you.
Notice how Kilo Lover failed the integrity test when Sgt Reyes DID provide his rank and unit details.
She won’t honor her side of the arrangement because…she HAS no honor. That much is very clear.
Let’s watch and see what type of squirmy back-peddling she comes up with to try and save face. She’s already attempting to avoid accountability with shit like “How old are you SGT reyes?”.
It’s fucking pathetic. Oxygen thieves like this bitch are disgusting.
You must be one of those fat/ugly women going after guys that are seriously out of your league… I don’t blame your need for shooting for the stars, but seriously, I feel sorry for you..
Please don’t.
- Sgt. Reyes
*famous*
WOW have you all ever heard of OPERA WINFREY??? It doesn’t matter if you like her or not, she is still famious, and has a great bf.
Why would you care? I don’t need to feed your anger more than it already has been fed.
Go take your Meds, Fuck off Dick’s site and go find some therapist to single out your delusions on. It’s been fun but you’re a waste of oxygen.
- Sgt. Reyes
bbl
How old are you SGT reyes?
Well dear. My rank is obvious considering the Sgt. isn’t it? MEU13th 99-2005, but I really don’t need to prove shit to you…
- Sgt. Reyes
Lets have your rank, MOS and unit then maybe i will tell you… You could be a fake for all i know.
Really? Rank, MOS and unit?
No of course not you gelationous warthog.
- Sgt. Reyes
I heard about assholes like you from a marine. He told me about your kind. He was truly one of the few, the proud. Knew what it meant to be a man and treat a woman with dignity and respect. Upstanding citizen.. you though.. you must be one of the ‘bad seeds’ he was talking about.
Before you grew into a fuckin’ Rhino or after. You’re a joke KL. Stop spamming up the site.
- Sgt. Reyes
LIKE I WOULD WANT AN INVITATION FROM YOU? IVE ALREADY HAD YOUR KIND
If you were playin around about it maybe but no woman will stick around for that kind of treatment if youre serious. Who the hell would put up with you?
I do and I have with every woman that I meet. Yeah. they sulk and bitch for awhile but in the end it all works out nicely.
They shut up and suck it. That’s not an invitation KL.
- Sgt. Reyes
SGT REYES WOULD NEVER DARE VOICE HIS SICK OPINIONS IN PUBLIC OR HE WOULD BE BEAT TO SHIT.
Neanderthals. Who hit you on the head
Nora just performed the internet equivalent of egging someone’s house and claims that Dick is immature. This is how juvenile our women are.
lol telling me to take note? i look better than anything you’ve ever had most likely. You must be talking about your mother mansman.
KL take note.
Uhhhh…………I see English was her third language, and the one she only picked up during oral sex she was paid for……….
DUDE GO HAVE A FUCKING SOOK..ALRIGHT…YOU ARE SERIOUSLY IMMATURE….LOSER HAVE NOTHING BETTER TO SAY…HAVE A SOOOOK BOHOHOHOOHOO! ASSHOLE.
beta_males_unite,
I fully agree with your assessment, but please note that fat, ugly women, go for very good looking guys to make themselves look better… Gorgeous women go after guys who make them feel good… thats the difference… Personally, I have zero tolerance for fat/ugly women…
Nice site…
The worst thing about fat chicks is that:
1. They’re a hundred percent more emotionally unstable than women already are.
2. Their self-esteem is shit and they try to take it out on everyone around them.
I recently had a conversation with a friend of the family who lost her boyfriend and literally gained over 200 lbs!!! She used to be the epitome of perfectly in shape and had been one of the top students in the LAPD police academy. I told her instead of bitching and whining about her boyfriend of 2 years ago to go hit a treadmill. She did listen to a MAN so that’s the first step in right direction.
I have an abundance of man points so i feel i can express myself and still be infront, fat chicks i have to say are great fucks, there easy and they fuck like its there last so i know i will get %100 strike rate when Im in a dry spell, it saves me putting my dick in a glass of water to get it wet!
Gives mike 25 of my own man-points for that excellent reply.
Sounds like a fat chick who has laid everybody.
Sounds like a bunch of lonely assholes here who can’t get laid, even by a fat bitch!!! HAHAHAHAHAHAHA
What is so attractive about obese women anyway? They’re everywhere in my own hometown! Nothing makes me sicker than seeing some women walking around in cutoff shorts and their fat jello ass is practically dragging along the pavement!
Well, maybe uncooked onions would make me sicker.
But why do they prefer to look like that? Obviously, they hate men so they don’t need anyone to impress. Or maybe they sit at home and listen to too many McDonald’s commercials!
Hahahahaaha.
Fat bitches are cunt safety nazis cus their obese asses would be fucking lunch in the environment that Homonids evolved.
The elite’s coopting of civilization to the city away from the farms from which it is dependant on, was the beginning of every “ism” that destroys the powerful and makes them bow to the weak.
dirk, that might be the manliest post on this site.
Getting down on 12 chalupas indeed.
-Dick
I fuckin hate fat bitches, Always so god damn cautious, walking around trying to save the world, trying to care for shit your supposed to let die only because they wants some one to care for their fat ass. The only thing worse than these fucking pigs are these mother fucking “SAVE A HOES”. They’re the ones fucking fat chicks, building up there ego so that fat bitches can go out and ruin the world for normal people. A fucking “save a ho” will sell out any dude, these guys have no male friends because they view all other men as competiton when theres no one trying to compete with him for that love of a fat bitch . I just saw a fat bitch at taco bell getting down on 12 chalupas, and you know she complained about something because thats what fat bitches do, they complain because they’re to fat and weak to do shit for themselves. DONT PUT THE PUSSY ON A PEDAL STOOL, its just an open bloody sore !
It is possible that a woman borrowed the sarcasm from another website or maybe she has accepted the fact that “we are superior” to her and the rest of those who are dickless?
this site is the bomb
i been browsing all around it
Thanks, Sam. Now fuck off my website. No women allowed.
-Dick
A woman? Highly unlikely. Actual use of sarcasm, proper grammar, and correct spelling were evident in that post. None of those are characteristic of females who post on this site.
I just want to say that as a woman, I LOVE this website! It’s brilliant - you are all so much more superior to me. I bask in your glory.
love Sam
i dont like fat women
they have no control
i dont understand men who like fat women
i so dont like them
yuk
I find it sad. Repulsive, contemptible even, but sad nonetheless.
- Re-Flex - Ubap
This past Saturday night I accompanied my brother to a dance club, (his wife rarely allows his a “guys” night out) and as was expect there were many attractive members of the female sex shaking their bodies in all manner of ways. In addition to the dance floor, there was an elevated “cat-walk” with cages at either end where a woman can be lifted above her competitors and prominently display her only worth while qualities. (the floor of this cat-walk, having been designed by a man, was made of steel grating should an attractive woman be wearing a skirt.)
Shortly after I arrived a food sprung, splendid, specimen of bovine beauty, having squeezed her brachiosaurus sized legs into a pair of hide tight jeans; (which I am sure took two hydraulic winches to fasten closed around the immense vastness of her midsection and no doubt took the jaws-of-life and an eight man rescue team to get her out of.) and without heed of the possible nausea caused to on-lookers nor the structural integrity of the cat-walk. She hoisted her gargantuan body up the stairs, her hooves falling with thunderous results on each step. Once on the cat-walk she stampeded her way to the dance cage, the steel grating creaking in agony with every foot fall. She then began to shake her huge mass of a body in time with the music, the thick rolls of her belly fat springing loose from her shirt and moving as several flesh colored hula-hoops. Many of us who witnessed the grotesque display ran to the restrooms, our mighty man-stomachs unable to hold back the bile cause by the horror our eyes had seen. The whole time this bovine continued her dance in an attempt to attract a mate. She actually thought she was sexy!! I found it, from a behavioral stand point, quite astonishing.
- Oldone
Very true BMU, very true. I have seen people that are considered fat, however they’re in shape. However, I have seen quite a few people that REFUSE to acknowledge the fact that they wouldn’t be able to run a mile, much less up the stairs.
-Strength and Honor-
“Fat acceptance” and “realistic body image”, like most of feminism, is about getting a better “deal” for fatties and uggos - to force us regular guys to accept these nasties, while they expect to get alpha males with looks and money.
They just love seeing alpha males with fatties/uggos - this is what they consider an “equal” relationship (like Oprah and Stedmann, for example). Such pathetic guys who wind up in charity cases like this are most likely emotionally/mentally disordered… probably uggo/fattie fetishists who like obese women to shit on them.
So I say to all of you uggos and fatties, you dont need more “self esteem” - in fact you have too much. Feeling insecure and suicidal is exactly the correct emotion .. it is evolution telling your fat ass to “shape up” or “ship out”.
diamatik gets the wolfe funny of the week award.
Though I’m also disturbed…
-wolfe
Well, that’s true Gwallan.
Of course, with women there is the double standard. Fat broad always “fall in love” with Good Looking Guy and want him to “love her for what’s on the inside.” So, why doesn’t she find a fat man and to fall in love with what’s on the inside? the ugly chick wants a hot guy, but the hot guy ain’t supposed to care? Gimme a break!
Of course, all men want to fuck hot chicks. When you ask them, you aren’t going to get some bullshit, paradoxical answer.
Anyway, fat bitches annoy the bejezzus out of me. They’re all over!
Many people will insist on doing what they’re told not to do or what is impossible. Note how many women post here even in the knowledge that they’re not welcome.
Sometimes the easiest way to make something happen is to say it’s forbidden or impossible.
Just try to conceptualize the mechanics of it all, then you’d understand why not.
Why don’t fat broads just find fat dudes to fuck? That’s always drove me crazy. Fat chicks want to fuck guys that find them revolting. Why? Because these dudes like to fuck hotties with hard bodies, bot faces of mush.
Blech, man I’m nauseating myself. No excuses for fat bitches in this world.
The “hedonist media”? That’s a fascinating and (original to me at least) turn of phrase.
I’m pretty sad about the garbage these people in ‘fat studies’ bring to my second profession.
The academy isn’t all filled with lunatic idiots unworthy of educating our sons and daughters… just mostly.
-wolfe
Obesity is unhealthy, but not as much as much as the hedonist media acts like it is. But those sluts think it’s a tragedy that all their fat whore friends can’t take movie stars to bed.
It’s the “endomorph” phenotype. Big boned with slow metabolism. Here’s a hint: if you have a slow metabolism, STOP EATING COOKIES AND WATCHING OPRAH YOU FAT WHORE.
I love this quote from the article: “Even as science, medicine and government have defined obesity as a threat to the nation’s health and treasury, fat studies is emerging as a new interdisciplinary area of study on campuses across the country and is gaining interest in Australia and Britain.” Its typical woman behavior to go against things such as science, medicine, and government, because these are the greatest man-things ever created. One cannot have those without facts, and we all know how much women hate facing those things. You can put a piece of dog poo in a nice little pink package with a pretty ribbon on it, but when you open it up, it smells like shit. Why? Because it IS shit. That is the same thing as “Fat Studies”
exactly, men dont say it’s ok for men to be fat, old, ugly, etc - but nevertheless these men get laid - so women must love consuming their fat, wrinkly grossness - this says more about women’s own hatred of themselves and their desire to be raped/abused - they get pleasure from it - then they feel guilty and blame men for it.
another thing, women have sex with the fat men who are powerful famous or rich because women know deep down men are good at things and do them for the sake of doign them, not just for vanity like women. women know deep down that they have no ability and are only good for their looks, that is why they talk so much about this crap, because they are insecure and guilty, and need powerful men to approve of them, so at least they can measure up to his belly-button lint one day.
Thanks Ian. Might just steal that to blog on.
-wolfe
Off topic, but this was interesting:
I especially liked the “heroin” comment.
Truth is a wonderful thing.
WTF? No fat chick has ever hit on me … EVER! The look of impending nausea that appears on my face every time I see them probably gives it away that I want nothing to do with their chunky asses. YUCK!
Hello fellow manly men! Dick, I love your site! I discovered it this last spring when I was finishing my last quarter for my degree and was inundated with feminist bullshit and lesbian perspectives (Which we all know is a lie) anyway, here is a like Re: fat chicks that reveals how they revel in their filth and uphold fatness as an attribute.
http://www.dimensionsmagazine.com/forums/
My cousin(the one who saved his life but not fucking my fiance when she tried) married a fat chick.
Some of them who don’t fool themselves into thinking that being fat is good or attractive have quite accomadating and servile personalities, if only because they have no other mating strategem.
Yes, more post-modernists should certainly die in plane crashes or in any way the Man upstairs sees fit.
/me says a prayer.
The biggest excuss Ive heard from women “Why is it ok for men to be fat?”
Ive never heard anyone say its ok for men to be fat, but thats what Ive heard the most from obese women while chatting with thier obese female friends.
The other thing Ive noticed is how they seem to think they are hot? Im serious, ive been hit on by women who must weigh a fucking ton and they act like I should be tickled to death for the invite. Ive seen fat chicks hit on guys at a bar wearing spandex and you can see the rolls of fucking fat with every move of their body and they still think thier hot?
Women = clueless
Seeing as how Fat Studies is clearly a post-modern ‘discipline’, what happens when you apply Deconstructionism to Fat Studies? Do all the female activists suddenly get thin and stop hating themselves and men?
That would be the movie I’d make. And all the deconstructionists would die in a plane crash and the women would go bake cookies (and quietly purge in stalls as Diesel says) for their men. I love happy endings.
-wolfe
The only thing less attractive than a fat chick is a fat chick who talks too much… about being fat. At least in the good old days women who were obsessed with being fat were ashamed of it. Look, if you feel the need to purge your guilt, at least have the decency to do it in a locked stall, not in a lecture hall where people might have the misfortune to witness it.
Oy, that’s queer.
- Metallica - Nothing Else Matters
the worst is when they (fat bitches) try to seduce men, it is one scary feat.