Old Men Are Saviors, Cougars Are Gross
A manpiphany is a jolt of genius that starts at the balls and proceeds directly to the brain. Whenever I experience this phenomenon, I open my mouth and speak as quickly as I can. What comes out may offend loads of women, but fuck women. The truth needs to be spoken.
Female anger is the weather vane of truth.
Truth is the enemy of women.
If a woman ever gets pissed off at anything you say, science will prove you right.
Old guys hooking up with young women is fucking awesome.
See? If any women were allowed to read that, it would offend the shit out of them. That means it must be the truth.
Old guys hooking up with young women is awesome and every guy in the world hopes to do it one day — tomorrow preferably. During our twenties, men realize that all women our age stopped emotionally maturing long ago. Puberty for women should actually be called retirement — a retirement of emotional growth, a retirement of critical thinking, and a retirement of whatever makes women not behave like frigid cunts.
Men are better than women.
You don’t buy a new car with a bunch of fucking dings in it, do you? Dings don’t fix themselves. Cars don’t “grow out of” a bunch of dings. God I fucking hate dings.
Women’s egos are like trees. You can tell their age by counting the number of un-fixable fucking dings all over them. Dings like getting offered $300 for a blowjob by one of her boyfriend’s poker buddies because everyone was drunk and she can’t take a joke or a hint. Here comes the sobbing MySpace journal!
Here comes the science.
Old men who hook up with younger women are propelling our species into the next millennium in a big way — big like an ACME rocket. A new study brought to you by the letters M, E, N, says old men are dumping genes that make them live longer into the E-Z Bake oven that is a young woman every time they cross the May/December divide.
An E-Z Bake oven is a cheap and over-hyped toy that produces a consistent supply of shit.
Think about it like this. Biologically speaking, women expire somewhere around 50; even though we know their actual expiration date is 23. Biologically speaking, men can reproduce into their 70’s. In order to pass on that “long life” gene, these older men must sleep with younger women. And by “younger”, I mean women in their 20’s. Do the math, 70 minus 50 is 20. It makes sense.
Older men who hook up with young girls are also doing you and I a favor. Girls who would date older men have father issues that border on psychotic. They’ll key your car if you piss them off. They’ll stalk you. The last thing you want is a relationship with one of these broads without a good twenty years on her. You’ll never hear the end of it, and if she wasn’t too stupid to figure it out, she would do something really horrible like wreck your credit.
A long living man needs to pass on his long living genetic code to a woman before she turns 50. 50 is when menopause rains down on women like the glacier of hormones it is. And that’s exactly what the study found: something I already knew.
Here’s something else I already knew: cougars are gross.
Everything you think is right.
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October 8th, 2007 at 1:24 am - IP Man-Hash: a281a32be3004
The purpose of life; to reproduce. It’s not an old man thing, its a HUMAN thing.
October 8th, 2007 at 2:20 am - IP Man-Hash: 422940479a69d
Yeah reproducing used to be something nice and optmistic.
Thanks to you women and feminists however, now some men are getting vasectomy’s so they aren’t fucked about with.
You guys just made into something you manipulate.
October 8th, 2007 at 2:23 am - IP Man-Hash: 109bcf0dfd9d2
Nobody wants to have sex with a 70 year old man, not even a 49 year old woman.
October 8th, 2007 at 2:57 am - IP Man-Hash: 422940479a69d
If both people are above 18, anything else age wise should not matter.
October 8th, 2007 at 3:17 am - IP Man-Hash: eeb32e3dc6874
Why not female? The average 70 year old male looks much better than a 49 year old woman.
October 8th, 2007 at 3:23 am - IP Man-Hash: f99d80a8a7b13
It seems that you preach that a woman’s only purposes are blow-jobs and incubation. Based on your recent posts, women are shitty wives, mothers, and certainly can’t be expected to hold down a thought, much less a career. At least, this is what I’ve gleaned so far with my limited abilities to think. (Sorry, call it XX genetic retardation, if you will.)
Okay, so if after 23 a woman is no longer desirable physically and past 50-ish, she can no longer incubate a spawn, so wouldn’t it be a BAD thing to increase the longevity of both men AND women? It seems to me that you’d end up with a world full of women (who’d be outliving their spouses if current lifespan trends continue) draining the resources of their sons (since clearly their daughters couldn’t be expected to take care of them - they couldn’t take care of themselves without a husband, right?)
Maybe you just need to come up with some sort of system where women are systematically destroyed after the age of 25 or after giving birth, whichever comes first. That seems as if it’d alleviate a lot of the issues you complain about.
October 8th, 2007 at 4:21 am - IP Man-Hash: 109bcf0dfd9d2
LOL yeah, okay, whatever floats your boat ;p
October 8th, 2007 at 4:33 am - IP Man-Hash: 109bcf0dfd9d2
btw, consider how sick this is, according to Dick’s argument, a man who is currently 50 would be having sex in twenty-so years time with a woman who would right now, be a newborn. Gross. That would be like having sex with one’s grandchildren.
October 8th, 2007 at 5:09 am - IP Man-Hash: 349c2dc95fedb
The truth always floats my boat.
It. is. true.
October 8th, 2007 at 6:10 am - IP Man-Hash: 109bcf0dfd9d2
I don’t even want to think about it.
October 8th, 2007 at 6:15 am - IP Man-Hash: cfc16a8e6e502
I’m confused. You admitted you have “limited abilities to think”, which suggests you are a woman. Yet, almost everything you said is so correct, I am drawn.
Nevertheless, you are indeed correct in all respects. Although, I would lower the age to 19… “Kentucky windage” if you will for the growing trends of Myspace and Paris Hilton.
October 8th, 2007 at 6:26 am - IP Man-Hash: a13ba81333017
@Female, evidently James “Scotty” Doohan’s wife did. Their last child was born when he was 80, and she was about 50. I’m sure you can subtract 9 months from those ages.
And if there’s a manlier man than Scotty or Doohan, I canna think who.
You should read the linked article. It’s got an interesting discussion of longevity. I’m not sure how much credence to give it, but it’s an intriguing topic.
-wolfe
October 8th, 2007 at 7:01 am - IP Man-Hash: 9183507e51584
Well I think a simple electric shock collar for all women over 23 and 9 months would be a start. They can still be useful and if they fail to be so a simple jolt of electricity will put them back in line. Why should men toil away cleaning toilets? Make women do all the garbage collection and all the menial jobs. Men have far more productive and manly things to do.
October 8th, 2007 at 7:11 am - IP Man-Hash: 109bcf0dfd9d2
I am skeptical that conception occurred from copulation. And again, I don’t want to think about it.
Your faith in my math is very generous.
I think I’ve already read it.
October 8th, 2007 at 7:44 am - IP Man-Hash: 19cb50505fa07
Well look at the film Logan’s Run.
Won’t work.
October 8th, 2007 at 7:45 am - IP Man-Hash: 19cb50505fa07
That’s her arsenic.
October 8th, 2007 at 10:17 am - IP Man-Hash: e36376410e1aa
Maybe you just need to fuck off my website.
-Dick
October 8th, 2007 at 10:27 am - IP Man-Hash: f42c56a3b67c9
One thing for certain is that a 50 year old man is in a damned sight better condition that a 50 year old woman. Try this question on both of them. This is what you would get.
To a 50 year old man:
Q “Would you sleep with a 50 year old woman?”
A “If there was nothing else available I guess I could force myself.”
To a 50 year old woman:
Q “Would you sleep with a 50 year old man?”
A “Hell yeah! Where the fk is he?”
October 8th, 2007 at 11:19 am - IP Man-Hash: 2c8448dad3d5f
“If a woman ever gets pissed off at anything you say, science will prove you right.”
I’ve always found this to be true. Re-quoted here for ManTruth.
October 8th, 2007 at 11:40 am - IP Man-Hash: a4ecb34b538d9
RobC….what a badass. Only true manly men are too afraid to type the word fuck
October 8th, 2007 at 1:18 pm - IP Man-Hash: f42c56a3b67c9
My bad, Jenn. Try this instead…..FUCK OFF THIS SITE!!!
October 8th, 2007 at 1:27 pm - IP Man-Hash: a4ecb34b538d9
Awww…so angry….why don’t you try changing your tampon?
October 8th, 2007 at 1:40 pm - IP Man-Hash: f42c56a3b67c9
Ummmmm…..it could be because I don’t have a cesspit called a vagina between my legs like you have. I’ll leave tampon insertion and removal up to you.
October 8th, 2007 at 1:58 pm - IP Man-Hash: a4ecb34b538d9
Nice one…vaginas are so disgusting that you fantasize about putting your cock in one. Not to mention you came out of one.
October 8th, 2007 at 2:13 pm - IP Man-Hash: f42c56a3b67c9
You couldn’t be further from the truth, Jenn. A vagina is the last thing I fantasize about and, before you say it, no…I am not gay. I just happen to have learned what bitches women really are and I realised a LONG time ago that they have nothing that I want or need. I don’t know you, Jenn just like you don’t know me. You could be a raving beauty but you couldn’t have me whether you wanted me or not. There isn’t a woman in the world can have me and there isn’t a woman in the world that I want. Without a vagina a women is surplus to requirements, any man will tell you that and when a man is able to dismiss that cum-pot between your legs then he has freedom. I don’t need a fuck, I don’t need female company and I certainly don’t need a wife. So you see…….to me you are surplus to requirements. Now go fuck off and taunt someone who gives a shit.
October 8th, 2007 at 2:16 pm - IP Man-Hash: a4ecb34b538d9
So you’re defying human nature and have become A-Sexual? Impressive..and bullshit. I’ll see you on RedTube later.
October 8th, 2007 at 2:27 pm - IP Man-Hash: f42c56a3b67c9
You’re just upset because there is actually someone in the world that really doesn’t give a fuck about you. One less wallet for you to tap. Bye jenn…..don’t hurry back as no one will miss you.
*Waves politely*
October 8th, 2007 at 2:31 pm - IP Man-Hash: f42c56a3b67c9
I gotta be honest here….I just had to look RedTube up because I really didn’t have a clue what jenn was talking about. Well, it’s been a while ;o)
October 8th, 2007 at 2:43 pm - IP Man-Hash: eeb32e3dc6874
Maybe female needs to look at the average middle aged couple. Those poor guys look like their dating their mothers.
October 8th, 2007 at 2:48 pm - IP Man-Hash: 980cc8a8ac1a7
Some elderly ppl. have this fetid aura of what I can only surmise is old age rankness about their person should you wander too close for comfort.
Must be too tough to wash behind the ears in their late years when they can barely get in the tub without breaking a hip.
Oh, I’m sorry. Did I say ‘elderly people?’
How rude of me…
I meant old hags.
October 8th, 2007 at 2:51 pm - IP Man-Hash: 980cc8a8ac1a7
Tell me about it. The mastodonts yet live.
October 8th, 2007 at 7:24 pm - IP Man-Hash: 78aa99a80f85e
I am skeptical that conception occurred from copulation.
You don’t have to be skeptical, you just have to be conversant with the facts:
James Doohan and his wife Wende were a very devoted Catholic couple who followed the Church’s edict that birth control was contrary to the laws of God. Consequently, when they had sex, there was always some chance of pregnancy. This accounts for not only Doohan’s last child being born when he was 80, but also the fact that he had a total of seven children during his life.
Tough titties, babe.
Here’s an awesomely manly series of pictures of Jimmy and Wende (and a couple of Sarah, their youngest) at the 2003 TVLand Awards.
And yes, that’s a kilt Jimmy’s wearing. I’ll leave it to your imagination to guess whether he’s got boxers or briefs under there … me, I’m guessing he’s going commando, ’cause there weren’t nobody manlier than Jimmy Doohan.
I double-dog dare you not to click the link. :)
October 8th, 2007 at 9:27 pm - IP Man-Hash: d653cff06dec4
Jenn fuck off the site before I have you tarred and tampon wrappered.
October 9th, 2007 at 12:02 am - IP Man-Hash: 980cc8a8ac1a7
AHAHAHA
October 9th, 2007 at 1:59 am - IP Man-Hash: 8df4b9656c70a
Dakota, seeing as you told a woman last week that the quote function did not have a problem and worked fine as long as one knew how to code, all I can say is, pwned!
And again, say it with me now.
PAWNED!!!!!
October 9th, 2007 at 2:15 am - IP Man-Hash: eeb32e3dc6874
What did you pawn female, your dildo?
October 9th, 2007 at 6:20 am - IP Man-Hash: a4ecb34b538d9
son of the suns…i am terrified of you. Tarred and tampon wrapped? NICE. Are you 5?
October 9th, 2007 at 6:44 am - IP Man-Hash: cfc16a8e6e502
Most women on this site try to make coherent-ish noises, that sound kinda like arguments. They arn’t good, they arn’t creative, and they most certainly arn’t right… but they try. And for that, I dislike them.
Word to these women: Never try. Just go fail in the corner like a good girl.
However, Jenn is hard at work actually PROVING everything that Dick and the men on this site have to say. If it wern’t for fine upstanding women like her, we might actually have to waste our time assisting them on the path to failure.
Jenn: It’s not our fault God didn’t love you enough to give you a penis. He did, however, provide you three or more holes with which to have a penis in you, at least for a time. Please stop insulting God further, and accept his blessing.
October 9th, 2007 at 6:51 am - IP Man-Hash: 980cc8a8ac1a7
I guess you’ve not heard of cesarean section, then?
Twit.
October 9th, 2007 at 7:20 am - IP Man-Hash: b24fa70c8e643
Slamdunk!
October 9th, 2007 at 7:50 am - IP Man-Hash: a4ecb34b538d9
Wow Sonyad…I’m stunned…I don’t even know what to say back to that. I mean, the way you threw the cesarean section procedure at me, suggesting that vaginal deliveries are a thing of the past…it was genius. Are you serious coming back at me with that? Really?? Kill yourself.
October 9th, 2007 at 8:52 am - IP Man-Hash: a94b38e8dadd7
Its true, cougars are gross.
October 9th, 2007 at 8:54 am - IP Man-Hash: b24fa70c8e643
How the fuck do you arrive at THAT conclusion?? He said nothing of the sort. Your feeble attempt at sarcasm was just pathetic.
What he did say by inference, was that HE was not a cunt delivered baby. You need to pay closer attention before openly embarrassing yourself with your dumbfuckness. You are truly a stupid cunt…and you keep on and on and on proving it for Chrissakes!!! Don’t you learn??
You’d better not be a fat cunt, or ugly, coz you’ll have absolutely no product left to sell if that’s the case.
Go back to MSN or Barbies or something. You’re wasting your time here. That is absolutely fucking certain. I don’t even think coming first in cocksucking school can save you from life’s scrapheap if this shit is any indication.
“Mansman tells you what you need to know”.
October 9th, 2007 at 9:02 am - IP Man-Hash: a4ecb34b538d9
Hi Mansman…the reason I thought it was strange that he chimed in with the cesarean thing is because I was having a conversation that didn’t even involve him, he was responding to something that was obviously directed at someone else. So why don’t YOU pay closer attention? Fucking moron.
October 9th, 2007 at 9:28 am - IP Man-Hash: b24fa70c8e643
What’s your IQ Jenn? Sonyad’s point was completely valid, well made and succinctly described your blunder in assuming everyone only comes out of a cunthole when born.
How much MORE attention can anyone pay to the screamingly obvious?
The only moron around here…appears to be yourself. All you need to do is admit it.
Slamdunk!!!
October 9th, 2007 at 11:11 am - IP Man-Hash: a4ecb34b538d9
You are such an idiot, your logic is about as good as a retarded five year old’s. So you’re saying that when two people are having a conversation and one says something about how the other came from a vagina, and then someone else (who doesn’t even know the other person in real life) chimes in with “har har har cesarean sections har har har” that it makes a valid point? How fucking stupid are you? Please tell me you’re drunk right now.
October 9th, 2007 at 12:35 pm - IP Man-Hash: 980cc8a8ac1a7
Mansman, beg your pardon but a pussy, not a cunthole, is where I sprung forth from.
I was referring to other ppl. who, less fortuitously for the mother(?), had to be delivered via C-section if there was any chance at all for them not to be stillborn.
Jenn’s a twit. You can clearly tell by her abysmal reading comprehension.
From that single, meagre line of mine of text she concluded I inferred that natural birth is a thing of the past…
@Jenn Why don’t you blow me to death?
October 9th, 2007 at 12:47 pm - IP Man-Hash: a4ecb34b538d9
@sonyad once again, kill yourself
October 9th, 2007 at 12:55 pm - IP Man-Hash: 980cc8a8ac1a7
Bite me. I’ve had my rabies shots.
October 9th, 2007 at 12:56 pm - IP Man-Hash: 980cc8a8ac1a7
Kill me until I’m dead.
October 9th, 2007 at 1:31 pm - IP Man-Hash: a281a32be3004
….You can’t kill someone till their dead.
October 9th, 2007 at 2:18 pm - IP Man-Hash: 4fc707f28c1ab
I tell you, Female, it’s bee a tough week or two at work, but when I saw that I’d been “pawned,” I had to burst out laughing. Awesome, truly awesome.
October 9th, 2007 at 6:29 pm - IP Man-Hash: f42c56a3b67c9
The conversation(?) you were having was with me and was directed at me. I stated that your vagina was a cesspit to which you replied:
Whether I came out of one or not doesn’t change the fact that a vagina is a cesspit. Did I come out of one? Couldn’t tell you as my mother died when I was a kid and that wasn’t the kind of subject I used to discuss with my dad. But even if I did it doesn’t change my view of them (sorry mum). I have no need to put my cock in one as you suggest and, as previously stated by me, that makes all women redundant where I am concerned because I have no need of you whatsoever. That, Jenn is pure freedom….something you will never have because, as a leech, you cannot survive without having something to leech off.
October 9th, 2007 at 7:49 pm - IP Man-Hash: b24fa70c8e643
Precisely. Women hate the fact that we can do without them, effectively becoming immune to any exploitation they might have in ‘mind’ to perpetrate upon us. They hate not having that exploitative power hold over Men.
But here’s where their double standard gets in the way of them claiming otherwise; Modern women rave on about being ’strong and independent’, yet loathe MEN who are…Men like us who through knowledge have indeed become TRULY independent of these womens manipulations…AND THEY HATE IT!
We have choices women don’t; THAT’S what they dislike. Periodically you see them bitching in the media about ‘foreign brides’ or 20yr old women with ‘much older’ guys. TOO BAD!!! It’s called having choices…live with it. Improve the product you offer, or fuck off. It’s that simple.
Would WOMEN drive around in an old battle scarred SVU if they had a CHOICE of a shiny NEW one? We all know the answer to that one.
-especially if the old SVU is a mongrel thing that’s always causing you some headache or another, won’t do the job it used to when it was new, or costs way too much to maintain.
New SVU? I think I’ll get TWO!! Aahh, having choices is great!!
October 9th, 2007 at 8:33 pm - IP Man-Hash: f42c56a3b67c9
This is just so true. On 14th October this year I will celebrate the start of my 8th year without any female interference in my life. I do have female friends; some are married, some single and a fair few of them are divorced and are bringing kids up alone. When they look at the freedom (and money) I have it gets on their tits and some have even tried to move into my “freedom” but have, of course, been unable to. Even the happily married ones have tried. I think they see me as a challenge but none are able to conquer the challenge they set themselves. Why? Because they have nothing I want or need and the only thing they can offer me is turmoil. First of all, when they fail, they hate me for it, then they get jealous of the freedom I have and then finally they realise that what it is that they really don’t like……and that is themselves because they are incapable of doing what I have done. For a woman to abandon and ignore all attention focused upon her by a male would be like asking her not to breathe. She could achieve it for a very short time but would have to return to it very quickly. I am single and, before the insults start, I am not gay. I am missing out on nothing in my life and there isn’t a thing that any female could offer me that would make me even consider changing the way I live and the person I am. In fact I challenge them to just tell me what I am missing out on just because I refuse to have any kind of attachment to a female. I know the answer. Do they?
October 9th, 2007 at 11:22 pm - IP Man-Hash: a281a32be3004
Ok, Rob C, do not take offense to this, it is a legitimate question with no malice or shit stirring intended; Are you gay?
That was an actual question, I wasn’t being a bitch. I was just inquiring.
In fact, is anyone on here gay? Again, no shit stirring intended. I’m just wondering if men that have such low opinions and respect for women, could actually be heterosexual.
October 9th, 2007 at 11:33 pm - IP Man-Hash: 78aa99a80f85e
Interestingly enough I’ve just about reached the point where I’m going to swear off women myself. I’ve just had enough, and it’s clearly become idiotic to continue to be a hopeless romantic/optimist.
A “good woman” is a contradiction in terms. Until I can get me a toaster like this (but with sunnier programming) there’s just no point any more.
This is one of the most brilliant quotes I’ve ever seen. :)
October 9th, 2007 at 11:40 pm - IP Man-Hash: 78aa99a80f85e
Clair, I daresay none of us are gay.
The reason we have such low opinions of women is due to one simple thing: life experience.
Even if you think we’re all totally full of shit, you should think about that. Women have now burned so many men so badly over so long a period of time that we’d rather choose a life of celibacy and lack of female companionship than deal with women again.
Think about it. That’s just how bad it is.
So when you read the next feminist article that harps on about how men are afraid of commitment/strong woman/[insert favorite male-bashing excuse here] and consequently women can’t find husbands, consider that the feminists are dead wrong.
We’re not gay and we’re not afraid. We just don’t want to deal with all the artificial drama, gold-digging, verbal/emotional abuse, and general bullshit that women inevitably drag into our lives.
Women are just no longer worth any level of interest, and the only people they have to blame for it are themselves.
October 9th, 2007 at 11:51 pm - IP Man-Hash: f42c56a3b67c9
Ok, Clair, please don’t take offence to this as it is a legitimate question with no malice or shit-stirring intended:
Are you fucking blind, fucking stupid or just fucking irritating? What kind of a stupid fucking question have you just asked me? READ MY POST!! No, let me make it easy for you and quote the relevant part.
Said RobC:
Now Clair…..tell me…..what part of “I am not gay” did you not understand? On second thoughts, don’t bother. Just fuck off and let the men talk amongst themselves.
October 9th, 2007 at 11:56 pm - IP Man-Hash: f42c56a3b67c9
DS, I return the compliment. Brilliant!!
October 10th, 2007 at 12:32 am - IP Man-Hash: a281a32be3004
Dakota Smith - ok. Thanks for answering. And no, I don’t think you’re all full of shit. I know that their are bitches out there, and I’m guessing some men (if not most) of the men on this site have encountered one or more which morphed their opinions on women. Just so you know though, alot of women have been burnt by men to, so much that they to have turned off the opposite sex. I think people owe it to themselves to not judge an entire sex based on the assholes that they’ve met. Thats the same reason racism is stupid and looked down upon. There are good women, just as there are good men. You and I, and everyone else owe it to these people to not label them the same as the assholes we’ve met. Don’t you think?
Rob C - Hey, no offense takin! Thanks for asking! It’s a pleasure to answer your question. No, I’m not “blind”, or “fucking stupid”, as for irritating, I believe thats up to personal opinion.
“Clair…..tell me…..what part of “I am not gay” did you not understand?”
It’s not that I didn’t understand it, it’s just that I didn’t believe it. You see, you