The Middle East Has Enough Problems As It Is
A women’s group in the Middle East is attempting to piss in the face of God this week by petitioning the king of Saudi Arabia for the driving rights they don’t deserve.
That’s right, the burning bra of feminism has torched itself all the way around the world. Women in Saudi Arabia want to drive.
I am writing this article as an open letter to King Abdullah (the king of Saudi Arabia) in hopes of stopping this catastrofuck of lady locomotion before it explodes all over the Middle East like ten nuclear bombs.
If you support this letter, show King Abdullah by signing below in the comments.
King Abdullah,
My name is Dick Masterson. I am a celebrated Man Coach and author of Men Are Better Than Women, a fine work of non-fiction that you can purchase in your local bookstore as of April 2008, or pre-order today through Amazon.com. It is a book of such masculine profundity that your camels will have goosebumps.
Sir, it has come to my attention that a band of progressive misfits and hooligans are attempting to bamboozle you into giving women the right to drive. Rest assured that your manly instincts in this matter are correct — as were those of your father and his father. Letting women drive is dangerous. It’s dangerous to life, and it’s dangerous to your way of life.
While 10% of Americans may not be able to point to your country on a map, 100% of Americans can point to a country who fucked up by giving women a number of rights they don’t deserve. That country rhymes with and also is “America”.
Driving is not a religious issue, sir. On that and only that do I agree with these groups of swindling activists. However, it is not a social issue as they claim it to be. Letting women on the road is a matter of public safety and national security.
Women on the road are more dangerous than cancer.
No cancer can hit you broadside at 60 miles per hour in a two thousand pound SUV. At least no cancer I’ve heard of, and I watch House MD reruns at least twice a day. I’ve heard of every type of cancer there is.
Just this month, a woman in Chicago killed her four kids by trying to race a train across the tracks. I don’t know if you guys have trains over there, but I hope you do because they’re awesome. They’re also deadly when women are behind the wheel.
Trains are just like divorces. Man always loses.
Women on the road are needless congestion.
Fact. If you allow women to drive, your roads will have ten times the cars on them as they do today. While men are working from 9 to 5, women are driving all over the place: shopping, shopping some more, getting their hair done. Women are so stupid and predictable that I bet they get their hair done over there in the Middle East even though they have to wear burkas at all times. Women are the same all over the globe, Your Majesty: dumb as Sea Monkeys.
The point is, when you let women drive, you’re giving them the power to vote. In this case, they get to “vote” on where they’re going. Voting is a slippery slope, sir, and the last “right” you want to be fucking around with like a hot falafel on Eid. I think you guys have enough problems over there as it is.
You may be familiar with the character Borat. He is an exaggerated personification of Middle Eastern stereotypes as held by the Western World. He’s humorous, and while he may have generated over 260 million dollars worldwide, he is very much a fictional character.
You may also be familiar with the characters of Hilary Clinton and Gloria Steinhem. While these “ladies” may seem like overly exaggerated stereotypes of barren and shrewish female horse-pigs, they are in fact real women. These women have been driving their entire lives.
Coincidence? I don’t think so.
I read about a television program you guys have called Amsha bint Ammash, where a woman wears a mustache and drives a cab around. Over here, we have a television program called Doogie Howser, where a 16 year-old is a brain surgeon. I think you’ll agree that some things are better left on television.
-Dick Masterson
MenAreBetterThanWomen.com
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I get Dick.
I’m Christian and I believe the law in Saudi Arabia so far is the best concerning women. This is because their laws coincide with the laws of nature.
Micho
Hilarious Dick your one crazy mofo “House MD” lol…. And I completley agree 100% women can’t drive, a car is their accessory ahuge make up box if you will and they prolly just buy it for the shiny mirror to reapply their lipstick. Ladies just buy yourself a nice iPhone instead (but that might be too complicated for them too it’s actually a stat that women find iPhones “complicated”)
I personally will not buy a car nor drive a car but for ecological reasons. And yes I am a woman.. Go figure
that’s hilarious, especially the House MD part. Awesome job.
“of lady locomotion before it explodes all over the Middle East like ten nuclear bombs”. its only in Saudi Arabia that women aren’t aloud to drive.
just wanted to clear that up.
That’s right. Unfortunately here in Lebanon women can drive.
But in fact, it’s the car driving them. Just yesterday a woman visited my brother’s wife. When she left, it took her about 15 minutes to turn back the car. This is not the first time she visits them. Every time one in the neighborhood volunteers to turn her car.
On the highways, most of car accidents are because women can’t drive fast.
What the hell are you talking about? There are countries where women can’t even leave the HOUSE. Saudi Arabia is just the only place where they’re trying to fuck it all up.
oh my god are you serious?..lol..by the way i would love to read an entry from you about something other than hating women..why do you waste your manly brains on something that people with a decent life do not take too seriously including most the women haters here…i am very curious about knowing how it is like to be you, dick..cheers..:)
Saudia Arabia is the perfect place for woman. The promised land for woman. God, I wish the world was like this. These are the facts, women do not get man privileges because they are useless. According to the Saudi judicial system:
The reasons women are forbidden to testify in proceedings are:
Women are much more emotional than men and will, as a result of their emotions, distort their testimony.
Women do not participate in public life, so they will not be capable of understanding what they observe.
Women are dominated completely by men, who by the grace of God are deemed superior; therefore, women will give testimony according to what the last man told them.
Women are forgetful, and their testimony cannot be considered reliable.
Women’s heads are smaller than men’s, and thus their brains are smaller corresponding to their lower IQs.
If there’s anything the Middle East need, it is most definitely more women in government. I don’t know how anyone could deny that. The Middle East is a typical example of what happens when too many men with their super egos get together and rule. They wage wars on neighbouring countries, squabbling over strips of land and using religion as an excuse - women cannot be blamed for these wars and conflicts for they are neither seen nor heard in many of these countries. I’ve seen posts where guys go on about how “men get along so well together without evil women to corrupt them”; they like to think that they are all brothers in arms, getting on together, able to sort things out “rationally” … yeah right. It has nothing to do with women; men just like to assert their power over all of humanity, it is in their hormones and in their nature… it is dangerous and has proven to be thousands of times.
So back to my first point - Saudi Arabia and other middle east countries most definitely need more women in leading government positions, it is unhealthy having too many men together, so many times have there been talks over the Gaza Strip and other long running conflicts (I won’t pretend to know a lot about these situations, because I don’t) but these man dominant countries just are incapable of rational peace talks.
Mans fatal flaw is he believes he is always right, yes the doubt of a woman may affect her negatively too, but how many wars have been caused by women in comparison to those caused by men? Of course there has been little chance for women to cause war due to their oppression, but the western world is a lot more stable now with women in government. The bible and other religious texts seem to encourage men to wage war, but of course that was written by narrow minded men.
PS - check your facts, smaller brains don’t equal lower IQ, women’s bodies are generally smaller in comparison to men’s bodies so their brains don’t need to be as big. It is relative size that matters. Also it is considered fact that only around 10% of the brain is actually used, people with higher IQ’s generally use more of their brain, yet their actual brain size could be smaller than that of someone with a lower IQ. I did have a laugh when I read an article where Dick was disputing the writings of hundreds of scientists, claiming men do in fact use their ENTIRE brain because, well, they are just more awesome than women. Cute.
The middle east’s problems are rooted in its religious beliefs, which dicatate that women never have a possition of power. Putting women in power there will not work untill the mens attitudes change. If you are interested in that line of thought, have you looked at Richard Dawkins website?
Saudi Arabia is a paradise for men.
Saudi Arabia is the best country in the world so far.
I second this petition. Letting women drive on the road is detrimental to public and national security. On a personal note, my great father always scolds my irrational mother who almost got us into terrible accidents. Ever since I received my license me and my father go alone and I bring him home safely after he has become inebriated from his man professional conferences. Female Driver = Intoxicated Driver.
Mr. Masterson,
I am so proud to be a man.
The Middle East especially Saudi Arabia is the best place for American women to be “women.” Women take everything for granted, they think everything revolves around them.
You said it: They think everything revolves around them. The reason is that some stupid men keep staring at women.
FACT: It is a MASSIVE MASSIVE mistake to think that “everything revolves around women”….
That’s only in HER head.
• I just want to be “happy”.
• I really want to be “happy”.
• I deserve to be “happy’.
A man will make HUGE, LIFE MISTAKES to pursue a woman’s happiness and make it a priority before his own.
I watched Spiderman III recently. . . .
The old bitch told Peter Parker:
“A man must put his wife before himself.”
That’s terrible female programming hard at work
to brainwash men into thinking that’s a satisfying life –>> FOR HIM.
I had a girlfriend once, who’s mother always used to say:
• “I just want her to be happy”.
• “As long as SHE is happy.”
• “We really want her to be happy”.
I got so sick of hearing that crap that I finally came out and said “Well I am not you. I don’t JUST want her to be happy. Because - call me crazy - I really want ME to be happy too.”
That bitch said that was an “asshole” thing to say.
I wanted her out of my life immediately.
Only WOMEN think their happiness is all that counts. And if she’s “happy” then everything is OK , regardless of how miserable and unfulfilled the male is.
WE KNOW WOMEN “JUST WANNA BE HAPPY”, THOSE SELFISH CUNTS.
Its all over their online dating profiles and hope chests.
But has any man EVER heard a woman openly declare:
“I believe I could really bring joy into a man’s life”?
Men are VERY busy trying to bring ( at the very least ) CONTENTMENT into women’s lives . . . . BUT IF YOU PAY VERY CLOSE ATTENTION, YOU’LL NOTICE —>> THE WOMEN AREN’T DOING A FUCKING THING.
Menarebetterthanwomen.
Oh God, no! Please don’t let them fuck everything up even more. Shit. That’s like giving people the right to rip each other’s heads off. It’s stupid and always leads to tragedy. Hopefully the country learns its lesson and helps all other countries keep women from recklessly plowing ruthless killing machines into schools and babies.
Kris. Men can’t handle this. their “big man brain” won’t comprehend this.
Its just like…if i looked up in the sky today and said, the sky is blue.
These men would have it already locked in there head the sky is red.
So no matter how much proof you have,no matter how many times you point to the sky saying “no thats blue”
These men would always answer back. “look, im sorry your feeble brain thinks its blue, my man brain knows its red.”
http://nobeliefs.com/
The Middle Easterners actually have much deeper respect for women.
http://www.answering-christianity.com/woman.htm
Anyone who has ever worked in the insurance industry will be able to tell you women have, and cause far more accidents than men. Its just that mens claims on the whole are larger. Therefore women make many more mistakes behind the wheel than men. Utterly shit drivers each and every one of them.
hello remember me im back still hate women then hi dick hows it hanging just wanted you all to now i have remarried again and i have him under my control hes my bitch and its great
hi It’s Nora ,
although I’m a woman but I agree with some of your ideas against women, like driving…etc and men better than women in controlling a country for example because God created her in this way and created men stronger than women by physical appearance and his ability to control his emotions ..etc .
my point is that why you’re generalizing that all women are whores , I want to ask you a question ”Is your mother a whore ? ” you’ll definitely say ”NO”, I don’t know maybe in your country all women are whores but in Saudi Arabia maybe 20% of women or less are not good ones, and we don’t have women naked in streets like you looking for men just for money . Our morals set by our religion Isalm, by our God and Prophet Muhammed (peace be upon him) , as you know , you definitely know a little bit about our religion , our women covered up from head to toe in black and this is good point for..
By the way the car driving by women in our country is out of the question ,not after million years
PS: We respect your country please respect ours (for the members)
Please respond or just read it .
hey Nora! i am a none sadui and living in saudia arabia for 12 years .saudi arabia is the best and promised land for women and i just want to ask a question to all those who blaming saudi arabia for women rights ‘tell us what is realy happening in yours countries? where women having sex with dogs .horses.and donkies .does it give women a feeling of freedom if not then go wipe out the all shits happening in yours countries then give your comments on saudi arabia and yes treat other as you would like to be treated give respect and get respect.
That is manlarious. Well done, UAE.
-Dick
Hey Dick,
I live in the UAE, and I don’t know if you already know this, but this country has the highest rate of traffic accidents in the world. Oh and you probably know this as well but Saudi Arabia and the UAE are very similar in almost everything except for one big thing…bitches can drive here.
You can imagine how bad the congestion is too, when half of the vehicles on the road are big ass SUV’s with one spoiled bitch in black behind every wheel. And believe me it’s very unlikely they’re going to work.
Thing is they don’t just shop, they’re fucking shopping junkies always going back and forth to a different one of the 10 malls scattered around the busiest locations in the city, desperately getting their fixes.
They got shit loads of money, no jobs, oh and no they’re not housewives either because the house maids literally do all the child raising….hmm so basically the only thing they contribute to the family is satisfying the libido of the husband…well at least one member of the family. Oh and for this loyal service they provide, they get shit loads of money to spend.
But gosh no I’m not trying to prove they are prostitutes…because prostitutes have got the slight bit of dignity in them not to be hypocritical about how they fuck for the cash.
A great man once said this much:
“Louis, you know it’s illegal form women to drive.” - Peter Griffin
It’s called cortisol and it applies to both sexes.
Every time you don’t get enough sleep and every time you “overwork” your muscles you have a worse effect than not working at out all.. as in the testosterone gets raped by coritsol.