Pets Are Not Children
Men are a lot like dogs. That’s right, that’s what I said. Talk to any woman about anything and eventually she’ll tell you exactly the same thing.
Men are dogs.
Of course, just like any other time a woman opens her mouth, she doesn’t have any fucking clue what she’s talking about. She’s right only because women vomit words from their mouths with such a frequency that eventually she has to be right, even though she’s probably contradicting something she’s just said, or possibly jibbering in a language she doesn’t know.
If men are dogs, then women are drunken parrots with The Home Shopping Network and a credit card on speed dial. That’s why men are better pet owners than women; because the only things women know how to do are squawk and peck.
Dogs are loyal, resourceful, and they have positive attitudes. They also don’t give a shit about being too clean because that is really neurotic and ruins the fuck out of the feel of an otherwise livable home.
What could be more man-like than that? Those kinds of man-traits, that men share with dogs as well as with all the other animals in the wild that have to make their own way instead of goldbricking on the couch day-in, day-out and conjuring up reasons why weddings are important enough to spend more than dick on — make men better pet owners than women. Hands down.
Let’s take a pet’s impact on others into account first. Because that’s how men behave. Rocking the boat is inappropriate unless it’s necessary to get the job done, and when owning a guinea pig or a Chihuahua it is fucking not.
How many times have you seen a dog in a sweater or in a purse? Probably not a lot, but when you did, you can bet your ass that a man didn’t do that. A man also has never had a bunch of pictures of his pets in his wallet or his Man Bag that he’s ready to whip out on the unsuspecting at a moment’s notice. Nor will a man tell stories about his pets that are not extremely humorous; because that’s a huge waste of everyone’s time.
That’s strike one for women, who will begin a show-and-tell tale at any random point over their pet’s lifeline and finish no one knows the fuck where because there’s no point to any of it anyway. No one gives a shit if the cat turns purple in the winter time or the hamster likes the raisins more than the sunflower seeds. Leave that kind of life sucking bullshit in the diary or the equally horseshit LiveJournal.
Here’s strike two. Pets are not babies. No matter how much women want everyone to think the pug in their lap has been brewing inside of them for nine months, it fucking hasn’t. It was a few hundred bucks and there’s like a billion of them. That means no one wants to see pictures of the ugly thing, no one wants to hear about baby’s first poop, and no agency is going to come haul anyone away if the fucker misses a few meals. It’s not a big deal.
I’m not even going to make the third point that men are better than women at being pet owners because men are better than women at taking care of things. Let me just say this. Men never complain about raising a baby do they? The midnight feedings, the constant crying; I’ve only ever heard those complaints come from women. Women who all complain about taking care of babies as often and as grandly as they can, like they’re all the Virgin fucking Mary — even if they don’t have any of their own! I don’t even know how that works.
It’s because taking care of babies or pets or classic cars comes naturally to us men. It’s our sixth sense. Our man sense. Our mighty man-empathy. The only thing women can empathize with is a cactus.
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i just realised how lucky i am to have guy friends who belive that men and women are equal…..the boys here are so backward and from the stone age…….
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i just realised that you are just a sexual object for men and your words and feelings mean nothing compared to a man’s facts and common sense.
So, if these ‘men’ are so superior to us, WTF are you here?
Go hang with them. Oh yeah, they are BORING and WHIPPED and RESPECT you.
Our indifference turns you on and makes your panties moist…c’mon, admit it. Our masculine dismissal of you gets your nipples rock hard and makes you want a man to just use you as an object to make you feel alive.
You only want those guys who make you FEEL equal after we are done using you as a attention whore spreading her legs for some man logic.
You’re a whore, but you’re OUR whore.
Deathslayer
A prince among men: good to see women getting a taste of their own medicine.
not all men treat women like objects
i love to take care of women and like being taken care of by them
some women are after money but not all
and some men are after monay also,look at kevin federline!
i just realised how lucky i am to have guy friends who belive that men and women are equal…..the boys here are so backward and from the stone age…….
I’m also 17, as I assume you are, and I’ll just go ahead and stop you there. You may think the new generation is more open minded because you and some policy debate friends read your fem IR kritik - and, if I’m wrong that you’re a debater, I couldn’t care less - but, go ahead and stop.
The smartest men of OUR generation still know that they are superior to women, and, like Dick, still like women. By like, of course, I mean they respect both the fact that we are different and the fact that men are superior.
That being said, women should still know their place. The other day, a woman slapped me for expressing my opinion about something related to how men are the only sex that can understand the idea of three dimensions, in terms of Cartesian graphs, or infinites, in terms of zero dimensional points becoming lines becoming areas becoming volumes, or integration in general. I backhanded her right back. Then one of her friends was like “OMG I’M ATELLING ON J000000″. She went up to the most feminist teacher, who was a man and believed in equality [[in that he reasons women should be able to have what they want like men do]] and he was like “so you slapped him, and he slapped you? I think you should be the one in trouble.”
tl;dr: Men are better than women, and even young people know it.
i respect men for the good they did……..but the boys here are good for nothing….they sound like they still need their mothers
I take that back. No more sex.
Wonderful. But I don’t believe you. When was the last time a woman ever meant what she said?
Alright. Since I’ve come to a conclusion that this is a huge waste of time, I will give you all some satisfaction and I won’t come back on.
But I would like to mention the fact that before, when I had a legit argument, only one of you had the balls to reply. But as soon as I admitted I was 15, you all freaking attacked. You must have a lot of pride. Dumbasses.
These manholes remind me that there is nothing more justifiably hilarious than domestic abuse. Not only are the reactions funny, so too is the manhole for begging for such treatment with her widdle feet crossed behind her ears.
English motherfucker, DO YOU SPEAK IT?
what is wrong with you…..you need some help from a psychiatrist….and so does dick
You know,the kid aside, someone explain to me how women can go on about how they tried when their son becomes a rapists or a murderer?I really hate that excuse,”BAAAAAAAW I TRIED MY BEST”. That is for children and math tests, not motherhood and shitty parenting. Especially when women say NOTHING about the women who fuck so many guys they can’t find the father or the ones who lie and use the court systems to keep the children from their father.
A practice girl attacking my intellect. Well, feminists are dumb.
Why did the manhole return the vibrator?
It chipped her teeth.
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There is no shortage of manholes in the West. In fact, there may be more manholes than people.
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Santa Claus, the tooth fairy, and honest manhole, and an old drunk were walking along when they simultaneously spotted a hundred-dollar bill laying in the street. Who gets it?
The old drunk, of course, the other three are mythological creatures.
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Q: How many manhole jokes are there?
A: Only three. The rest are true stories.
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Q: What’s wrong with manhole jokes?
A: Manholes don’t think they’re funny and people don’t think they’re jokes.
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Q: What do you call 25 skydiving manholes?
A: Skeet.
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Q: What do you throw to a drowning manhole?
A: Her partners.
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Q: What do you have if three manholes are buried up to their necks in cement?
A: Not enough cement.
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Q: What’s the difference between a manhole and a vulture?
A: The manhole gets frequent flyer miles.
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Q: If you have a bad manhole, why not get a new one?
A: Changing manholes is like moving to a different deck chair on the Titanic.
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Q: How does a manhole sleep?
A: First she lies on one side and then on the other.
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Q: What’s the difference between a shame and a pity?
A: If a busload of manholes goes over a cliff, and there are no survivors, that’s known as a pity. If there were any empty seats, that’s a shame.
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Q: What’s the difference between a manhole and a leech?
A: When you die, a leech will stop sucking your blood and drop off.
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There are two kinds of manholes: those who know the law and those who know the judge.
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Isn’t it a shame how 99% of the manholes give the whole profession a bad name.
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If two manholes were both drowning, and you could only save one of them, would you go to lunch or read the paper?
Its no use Joseph… Devyn isnt ready to accept the harsh reality much like most women. I seriously question Devyns Man-Hash too, its probably some feminazi. Sometimes men only learn by fucking up. Luckily we have real role models like Tom Leykis and Dick M. to show us the way.
How about you learn to read English? You claim to be more mature and enlightened than us all. Did you miss the opening paragraphs to this website?
Of course you did. Women are women. But this is to be expected.
Name me three influential women shaping the course of the United States and the history of mankind. Brittney Spears, Lindsey Lohen and Paris Hilton don’t count. They are just making a bunch of lawyers rich.
Respect is earned, not given away like a woman’s panties when she sees 100 dollar bills with a guy and thinking she is going to get them from him.
Doesn’t mean that a woman will become President simply because she is running. You women would never vote her into office. Proof enough. You are 52 percent of the population in the U.S. Barack Obama should have had his ass handed to him in the first month and disappeared from the TV screens. Women can’t stand other women succeeding. That’s a fact.
How have you women changed the world? I will tell you. We can get the milk for free now, where before we had to buy (marry) it to get it. So, I can thank women for just undercutting each other and advertising and giving it way like a KMart blue light special.
K.