The Rule of Thumb
Men, I want to ask you something. How many times have you been slapped? By women I mean. How many times has a simple argument or perhaps a bawdy and hilarious joke been countered by a flagrant personal foul?
I myself have been slapped more times than I can count — upwards of eight. But in return, I have never hit anyone that didn’t deserve it.
And women never deserve it.
That’s because women don’t know what they’re doing or saying ever. Women speaking is like giving a teenager a book of French idioms with no translations and a bottle of Cognac. Within ten minutes, they’ll begin spouting complete and inappropriate gibberish at anyone who walks by and won’t be able to remember any of it the next day.
That doesn’t mean they should have their asses kicked for it though.
Irene Frieze has recently published a report on the issue of women and domestic violence. Upon doing so, she immediately took out a restraining order against “Every Psycho Feminist on Earth” who mobilized en masse to prove her findings correct.
Her findings?
Women are way more likely to initiate physical violence in a relationship or in the home.
I should note that I didn’t actually read her findings, but they’re something to that effect. That particular figure was just generated on the fly by me.
Because of Miss Frieze’s ice-cold, sexy findings, I’m officially naming her MenAreBetterThanWomen.com’s Honorary Man of the Month. Easy peasy, way to go Friezey. What Miss July has done here, is taken a big man-step in busting the myth that women are made of sugar and spice and things that are nice. They’re not. Women are made of vinegar and piss and are loud-mouthed and slap-happy.
That’s it. There’s no cute little rhyme there because I’m a man and I hate that manner of shit.
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i think feminism would be defined as woman being greater than men. not equal. the whole guys are better than girls, girls are better than guys blahblahblah thing is so childish. it makes me think of elementary school, when we thought the other gender had “cooties”.
.
i wouldnt say “completely unable”… buy anywho,
violence doesnt answer anything. what ever happened to talking (or arguing…) things out? ive never slapped a guy, though at times i truly wanted to (just to be honest and all). actually i never slapped anyone except for the ONE occassion. it was another female. though deep down i think she deserved it, it wasnt right. we all make mistakes though, right?
*sigh*…
It’s a contradiction. If feminism was concerned with gender equality; it would be promoting gender-neutral solutions to societal problems. Instead, it focuses on gender-specific solutions; while highlighting female-specific attitudes as problems.
Much of feminism doesn’t believe in pure equality of sexes, hence the whole (newer) “equal but different” philosophy. Further, the concept of “equal” is something that is continually defined, and redefined by feminist authors. This provides a mechanism for continuing “special status” claims even if/when statistically equivalent ratios are met between the sexes; perpetrating the exact conditions it claims to resolve. (See comments on Sweden, and circular logic). Don’t kid yourself. Feminism is big business in the modern world; and money talks.
That’s bullshit.
-Dick
The reason that feminism is concerntrated on women is to address the inequalities of the past so that people of both genders can be on a level playing field.
Nicole,
The point of feminism is to provide women with equal status to men; where the terms of equality are defined by feminism itself.
The focus is clearly on women, not on people in general. This focus is in direct contradiction to its intention of promoting “equality” as it itself promotes a divisiveness between genders through its focus on differing “male” and “female” genders, roles and sexes; as well as the claims that women need special treatment for issues, rather than dealing with the issues themselves in gender-neutral ways (ie: rape, domestic violence).
Although there is litterature in feminism talking about how society works against men; it is generally in regards to how men need to correct themselves or societies in order to benefit themselves; and of course women as well.
PS: “rule of thumb” was claimed by early feminists (printed as fact in women’s studies text books) as coming from an arcane british law saying that men had the right to beat their wives with a stick no thicker than their thumb. (Used as significant evidence for male oppression and violence towards women)
This has since been determined to be a fabrication.
http://www.canlaw.com/rights/thumbrul.htm
Deserved it? I enjoyed it.
-Dick
Dick, feminist’s whole point is equal rights. Men like you are the only ones who don’t agree with that.
P.S. you probably deserved it when you were slapped.
I think we must be charitable here and allow the women to flail away at us occasionally, as long as they use only their small, soft hands. After all, as men we can absorb a great deal of punishment and physical violence seems to be the only way a woman can articulate her ideas. As Vanessa indicates above, her reaction to her boss’s playful antics in the stockroom was to slap him. Of course, had a woman grabbed a man’s ass in the stockroom he would have handled the situation in the proper way, i.e. he would have dropped his trousers and allowed her to enjoy a tender moment of sharing that would have brought them both closer together as human beings and probably would have boosted their productivity for the company. Since women are generally confused due to menopause and PMS, we can’t seriously expect them to handle situations properly and so must treat them as we would treat a rambunctious llama. Allow them to hit, but if they hit too hard, give them a firm slap with a rolled-up newspaper.
The main reason why women hit us is because were bigger and stronger and they know this and in knowing this hit us knowing that we barely feel it anyway.
Nicole, brava, maddam! Another quote for posterity.
“Don’t offend us…and we won’t hit you.”
Brilliant! Equal rights rolls in its grave.
-Dick
Don’t offend us and we won’t hit you. Simple as.
My god! This site is awsome. I am serious here.
I think accountability has a lot to do with this, or rather a severe lack of accountability. To be honest over the years I have noticed less and less men coming to the aide of females when they start shit. The ones do are usually pussies anyways. Ever since I put on 100lbs of rip (took 3 1/2 years) I make sure that when a broad hits a man and some chivarious male steps in for her I make it clear that he hits the man then I’ll hit him. It’s important to note that I sure as hell aint the toughest but at 6′4 295 pounds that fucker better listen to me. My logic is simple, people don’t wanna behave fine with me, I’m a big son-of-a-bitch and I wont behave either. Treat people with respect or we’ll alpha male it mutherfuckers.
NO FAT CHICKS!
Dick, why is it you insist that ‘there has never been anything wrong with any man ever’ which presumably includes spousal abusers, yet you also believe that ‘women never deserve being slapped’.
That’s quite a contradiction, even for you.
I for one have not hit a woman (unless it was playfully) and I have to agree with the above statement from Dick. Women do cause more domestic violence as far as I am concerned. I have been hit more times by women than I can count this includes: Slaping to the face, Kicking to the balls, Knees to the balls, Slaps to the arm. as you can see I have rarely been punched but it has happened and I would say that apart from maybe 4 times all of these were random hits for no reason because it was found funny by the woman striking me to see me squirm on the floor for a moment while I am on the floor due to a kick to the balls.
I have found when you playfight with a woman, it becomes slappy from her side and I always get brusied… hell I have been play fighting with a woman and been hit with a baseball bat [it was a small kids bat made out of wood]. Now the only times I have ever hurt a woman is by accident, for example and most common, grabbing her wrist to stop her kicking the shit out of me, then her screaming because she hurts herself trying to force herself out of my grip, if I let go I get a worse beating so usually I have to pin them and wait for there violent sore looser attitudes to calm down.
Women stop hitting us, If I hit a woman back that woman would never do it again, but as the gentleman I am, and the non violent person I am, I dont and never will hit a woman.
I raise a mug for our honorary Man of the Month- women are full of vinegar and slap happy as all get out. What I don’t understand is why women insist of hitting guys when the most they get out of it is possibly hurting their own hand or wrist. You would think women folk had figured out by now the dangers involved with such careless and brash behavior.
Vanessa,
Perhaps you should rethink your wardrobe or place of employment. It’s a common female misconception that when you’re in a bad environment you should start complaining as loud as possible to fix it.
-Dick
I blame menstruation. All those fluctuating hormones make women completely unable to control the slightest emotional distress. I mean, we basically lose our entire personhood and just become bitchy, chocolate-craving entities of hemorrhaging and histrionics, am I right?
And I for one appreciate this philosophy of gender noblesse oblige, that you refrain from retaliating when we do get a little inappropriately slappy. Looking back on it now, I am really grateful of the patience my boss showed the other day when I slapped him after he grabbed my ass in the stock room. I mean, seriously, what was I thinking! I go around asking my girlfriends if my ass looks okay all the time, but when a man lets me know that he thinks my ass is definitely looking okay, I freak out. Hypocrisy, I know. I know. It is a daily struggle, but I shall overcome!