What About Teachers, Nurses, and Bank Tellers?
Men are better than women. We all know it and I proved it beyond the shadow of a doubt in my mansterpiece Men Are Better Than Women — on sale now.
Men are better than women at everything and every job in life. But doesn’t that mean every job should be staffed by men? If mine and Jesus’ premise is correct (that men are better than women), shouldn’t capitalism ensure a male only workforce?
I have had the following question thrown at me on the radio by dozens of hysterically horny bitches from here to the Eastern Bloc.
“If men are better than women, why are so many women teachers, nurses, and bank tellers, you gay fag? Women are better than men at those jobs!”
The answer is simple. Teachers, nurses, and bank tellers are predominantly female because those jobs are easy, cheap, and worthless. They’re a perfect fit for women because that’s what women are: easy, cheap, and worthless.
Easy
Being a teacher is easier than being a professor. It’s also easier than training a dog, making a pizza, directing consumers to Jamba Juice, and probably easier than turning a piece of paper into a fucking sailor hat. You don’t get three months paid summer vacation for doing that. Aside from popping out a kid and then organizing a carpool for the next 16 years, teaching is the easiest job on Earth.
The easiest job on Earth is Motherhood.
If women want to teach so badly, why don’t they teach pupils who will pay to be taught? Because they can’t. No one will pay to learn math from someone who gets her taxes done at H&R Block. No one will pay to learn economics from someone who makes her husband pay for the fifth graders’ school supplies.
What life lessons do four dozen glue sticks teach?
The simplest explanation is the correct one. That’s called Occam’s Razor and if teachers taught it, they would teach themselves into a 90% pay cut.
Being a nurse is easier than being a doctor. It’s also easier than playing Q*Bert because at least in Q*Bert you have to make a decision or two. Nurses just do whatever the doctor play book says and act like they got nailed to a cross when they showed up for work.
Doctors have two things nurses never will: a penis and responsibility. Being a doctor means calling the shots and getting your ass kicked if you call them wrong. House gets sued all the time for his shenanigans. Cuddy even put aside a legal fund in addition to his salary for the sole purpose of defending him. But guess what? He saves lives. He saves lives, and not the stethoscope, the defibrillator, the MRI machine, the bedpan, the nurse, or any of the other tools a doctor uses to do his job.
Being a nurse means holding a little bit of power over sick people until they’re desperate enough to fake like they don’t want to shove a crutch up your fat ass. Take it from anyone who’s been to a hospital. Nurses are bitches. And nothing comes easier to a woman than being a bitch.
Being a bank teller is easier than going to a bar and sizing a man up for his money via a social interaction. A lady bank teller can just check the computer, get a low-cut top, and slip her phone number and ring size in with a man-millionaire’s bank receipts.
Cheap
Sex and money make men feel good. Whenever I hear about a man being “depressed”, I ask, “How much sex is he getting and how much does he get paid at work?” I have never been surprised by the answer.
“Not enough and not enough.”
Not enough.
Women, on the other hand, are black holes of happiness. The only thing women need to quench their depression is more depression. And nothing provides that like a job that requires them to balance a big fucking cross on the chip in their shoulder. If there was an Olympic event that resembled the caber toss except competitors never actually threw it and the caber was also an 18-foot-long manifestation of their delusional self-importance, men couldn’t even compete.
Nursing, teaching, and being in the service industry are that caber.
The reason there are so many women in these fields is because they’ve priced men out of the market. Women will do “shit jobs” like wiping shit off the ass of a crack addict because it makes them feel good about themselves. It titillates the motherly instinct located in their vagina and compensates for the low pay. In fact, it drives the low pay! The same goes for babysitting a bunch of juvenile shitheads who don’t want to be there, and bringing me a Long Island Ice Tea that actually has some liquor in it this time.
Women value getting treated like shit so highly, they do it professionally. Because we men have brains instead of vaginas, we need an extra 50K a year to put up with that crap.
Worthless
Teachers are overpaid babysitters. Nurses, at best, are tools for a doctor to use — during and after work.
Technology has increased to a point where it’s difficult to identify the culmination of women’s gratuitous shortcomings in today’s modern workforce. Did she miss that email because the computer “messed it up”, or because she was crying in the bathroom? Because of technology, there’s no way to know for sure without growing some balls.
Children learned more about the world from the Wii than they ever have from some teacher. Supply and demand, you little bastards. If everyone wants a Wii for Christmas and your parents are broke, fuck you. There is no greater lesson in life.
Money makes you happier.
If you think female bank tellers are worth more than the pennies that rattle around in their drawers, I have three little letters for you.
A-T-M
Manclusion
If the CIA (Cleavage Inspection Agency) was an actual job, guess what? It would be staffed entirely by men. That doesn’t prove men are better than women at looking at boobs. It just proves that men will look at boobs for free.
Men are better than women at looking at boobs though. Women can’t even look at their own boobs properly. If they don’t look 17, women aren’t happy with them.
Grow up, ladies. Your tits sure have.
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Dear savanna,
I agree that pointing out minor grammatical errors in order to insult someone is a bit much. One effectively proves that they’re an idiot when they make huge factual errors. Speaking of which, men are not a separate species from women. Good job furthering the already low opinion men have of your genders intelligence.
I think a lot of the problems with the education system are CAUSED by women teachers. I recently graduated, and I have to say up until high school, I had nothing but female teachers for the most part. And what happened? The work was easy, everyone passed. They gave plenty of do overs and retries…students would get good grades for doing nothing because the teacher “liked them”. Most of them aren’t there to fucking teach, they get attention and like it…why do you think so many female teachers have sex with kids?
Now the few male teachers I had were real teachers. Hardasses. Men who would give you one fucking chance to pass a test and if not they made it clear you were screwed. They too loved their students: they loved them enough not to cheat us out of an education by giving us open book tests and retakes. They expected us to have accountability, and god help you if you fucked up. They didn’t smile and give you a barely passing grade like the female teachers. No, they let you know the straight truth: you fucked up, better luck next time.
And like the female teachers, they were still friends of the kids. But the female teachers were only liked because they did the one thing women are good at: whoring out to what you want.
A dude I know with kids was a house husband for a while, because his wife said she couldn’t handle the kids so she went out to work. He loved looking after his kids and doing the housework, and said so to everyone. Woman hated him when he said that. They got really upset and even said he was lying. The wife wanted to swap back too, and made him get a fulltime job.
He knew he was being manipulated, but what could he do?
And they steal your change too, right in front of you, as though its some sort of tip owed to them.
HAW! Jewelry is entertainment for women! Women are entertained by shiny bits of metal and rocks! Hey Monkey Rape, I’ll trade you these shiny beads for your computer! Idiot.
-Rawkstah
Um, import one if you like. The divorce rate is lower for marrying imports, but it’s still pretty high. And, if you are one who gets shafted, it helps you not to know it was statistically unlikely.
From what I know, it’s not just American men but women who are leaving nursing and teaching fields. The U.S. is now hiring foreigners from poor countries to do these jobs, and many of them are men (not women). And in countries like China, where females are seen as inferior, women take up the bulk of factory work, which includes operating heavy machinery and electrical equipment.
Finally, I don’t see the difference between you and women, in the sense that they like jewelry and you like game consoles. Video games are meant for entertainment, not education. Unless you are going to claim that you learned to read and write (including your book) by playing video games, you’ll probably have to admit that you learned by reading books and by working with your hands. You’ll also have to remember that throughout much of world history teaching was dominated by men.
I work in a hospital and my mom is a nurse and I must say: this article is a big box of truth. It’s like the ark of the covenant and women opened it and had their faces melted off. My mother is the best nurse a woman can possibly be and I still won’t let her near me. I have no medical training whatsoever and I have still had to stop nurses (always women) from killing patients. Literally killing patients. All it takes is a little common sense to be an effective health care provider. But as we all know, women have little to no common sense or empathy. Should a woman be blessed with even the smallest amount of these traits, then she will subsequently be stripped of them by her female nursing instructors. It is hard to comprehend the sheer incompetance of women in any field, but especially so in nursing.
As for teachers, everyone’s favorite teachers are men. Male teachers are the only ones to give students challenging homework assignments and they never assume their students are stupid. Kids hate homework, so how do male teachers do it? They’re men. If men can build aqueducts with their bare hands, then they can make kids love to learn. Women should wait until they themselves have learned anything before donning the mantle of teacher.
Take out white and you’re completely right. Really, black women are even worse. Strong black woman my ass, always blaming something on race or sexism when it’s their oversight that did it. I know one who puts more effort into a fishfry than her own son who’s she considering putting on ritalin. Bullshit I say.
Absolutely true. White, American women suck. They are horrible. They are lazy and have this constant feeling of entitlement. They want everything and appreciate nothing. I’m done with white girls. This is coming from a white male, too. IMO, a nice imported model is the way to go. Maybe a silky Asian or a spicy unit from South or Central America? Some one who really appriciates you and what you do for them. Also the fact that they stay hotter, longer. White girls age faster than other models. Ever see a hot Asian and find out she’s 40, but looks like she’s 25? White women can be 25 and look 40! Yuck! If you want them to stay looking hot, you have to dump all kinds of $$$ into maintenance programs like boobs, lipo, facelifts, tummy-tucks, etc. Fuck that!
again long live the DICK……. ya BITCHES finaly a man that has the BALLS to say it how it is!!!!!!!
I am Chief of Design and Development for an Internet Company. I think up amazing shit for high-traffic websites, produce it, and push it into production. I can do it all single handedly - from concept to reality - I am completely self-taught (no woman on earth could EVER teach a man that shit), can design and program the backend myself, and I direct my own staff.
There isn’t a woman alive that can DO what I do.
There isn’t a woman alive that can TEACH what I do.
. . . which has EVERYTHING to do with MEN BEING BETTER THAN WOMEN.
MATT!!!! 100% TRUE!!
. . . especially the “favorite” students part.
SERIOUSLY laughing over here.
Female teachers are the worst.
Just like single Moms.
They never bring out the BEST in someone,
only the WORST.
Their methods and mentalities are like “I am going to tell you that you are crap because I am a woman and I respond to negativity and insults better. If I insult you and tell you you’re no good, you will work and try harder”.
No teacher . . . I will laugh at you for being a shitty teacher.
LOL!!!
I truly never get tired of stupid prejudice crap that women spew on this site. This quote should end it.
Quote from Muzalon: “[Women] cannot conceive that any man who is not manipulated by their pea-brained bullshit could be anything but gay, in consequence.”
Are you kidding? Thats a woman’s M.O!!!!! They try and get away with having some effect on men by saying that shit ALL THE TIME! Its up to MEN to make sure they FAIL miserably.
• If a MAN doesn’t want to fuck her (for ANY reason) - he’s “gay”.
• If a man says something she didn’t agree with (or want to hear) - then “he’s got a tiny little pecker”.
The correct thing to do when you hear (or see) a woman try and pull that “you’re gay and you have a little dick” shit, is —>> POINT AND LAUGH AT HER . . . THEN WALK AWAY AND DON’T TURN BACK.
This is NOT the reaction she is expecting. She is expecting you to be interested in PROVING that his dick isn’t tiny, and that he’s not “gay”.
Usually I will say something like:
• “Why don’t you get down on your knees and open your mouth and I will show you how queer I am.”
• “You can tell my COCK how queer I am”
• “Until you can base the whole thing AND BOTH BALLS while saying “Please cum on my face, its my first time”, no woman has any business calling a man “small”.
In my experience, she will usually be removing her own clothing in under 3 minutes,
because women RUN after men who pay NO attention to them. The more you IGNORE them, they more naked they are willing to get . . to GET MORE attention.
These are the standards that WOMEN set!!!
Just look at “Elizabeth” above!
. . . the stupid cunt doesn’t know how to argue a point - OR PROVE ONE - so she calls Dick a “queer” and thinks she’s said something a man should pay attention to. INSTEAD OF ACTUALLY SAYING SOMETHING THAT A MAN’S WOULD PAY ATTENTION TO.
She couldn’t do it. So he’s GAY. He has no Dick.
And that’s why women are useless for anything other than sperm dumps.
Jesus Christ Elizabeth . . . . having an OPINION of ANY KIND doesn’t make you ‘DUMB’. You know the difference between THOUGHTS, OPINIONS and ACTIONS . . . . DONT YOU???
Why do you BEHAVE like the man “TREATED YOU BADLY” just because he has an OPINION and WROTE about it.
No one is FORCING you to read it.
Noone is FORCING you to agree.
So why are you behaving like they ARE?
For women - everything about this website says LEAVE! Dont’ read! Don’t comment! You are not welcome! We have an opinion that you will not agree with!! LEAVE NOW!!
. . . . And then you still post like someone fucking cares.
From where anyone else is sitting , YOU’RE the fucking idiot.
••• “Well Dick I would like to say by making this website you dont only sound like a total queer but im sure you look like one too” ••••
You must be used to men who are willing to tell you ANYTHING YOU WANT TO HEAR to get laid. Remember how you recently told your girlfriends at lunch that men are all lying pigs that are only after one thing????? Well now you know why. You make the price for pussy a LIE . . . and some guy will pay it.
Congratulations. You’re a stupid fucking whore.
Now you sit around a lunch table with your “friends” who don’t even LIKE you,
while you all blame the MEN for it. . . . and men who WHO ACTUALLY TELL YOU WHAT THEY THINK - INSTEAD OF WHAT YOU NEED TO HEAR TO SPREAD YOUR LEGS —>> are suddenly “gay”.
Hilarious.
••• “Without Women You Wouldnt be Alive right now ” ••••
No no . . . if your father didn’t pound his cock into your Mommy’s pussy as far as it would go, and inject his sperm into her vagina . . . YOU wouldn’t be alive right now.
That’s what vaginas are for.
To make more men.
You know that, right?
Did you think it was for Love?
or because you love being lied to.
••••• “And guess what. The female race will never need you . . . ” •••••
Females are not a “race”.
Females are a SEX of a species.
The species known as HU - MAN.
And as a MAN, I am glad to have taught you something you didn’t know until just now.
MENAREWAYBETTERTHANWOMEN.
Funny how every stupid chick always uses this line against Dick. Maybe this quote from Tucker Max will shut you the fuck up.
“I met his girlfriend on Friday night at a party. She is an Afghani girl (Pashtun tribe), and goddamn if I wasn’t a bit jealous. Smart, educated in England, hot, and loyal. She’s the type of woman that would help you hide the body, and those are the ones you keep.”
http://messageboard.tuckermax.com/showthread.php?t=20933&highlight=dic k+masterson&page=2
My mother was a nurse (retired now) and she is EVERYTHING you just said.
I was laughing my HEAD OFF while reading.
My father died a few years ago.
He was not a Doctor, but he was a MAN.
He would be laughing too!
For a brief while , I became a school teacher (at a PRIVATE school predominantly run by middle-aged single women) for a couple of years AND SIMPLY COULDN’T BELIEVE WHAT FUCKING T-E-R-R-I-B-L-E teachers they were.
“BABYSITTERS” –>> IS EXACTLY WHAT THEY WERE!!
There is NO HINT OF EXAGGERATION in what Dick said here.
They didn’t teach their students ANYTHING useful, or what they needed to learn.
• These bitches were moody.
• The haven’t seen a dick (or been properly fucked by one) in 1000 years.
• They took their frustrations out on their students.
• They were focussed on NOTHING.
• They GOSSIPPED and joked about NOTHING relevant.
• They would say retarded shit like
“QUIET!!!!! DIDNT I TELL YOU TO BE QUIET??? ANSWER ME!!!!!!”
• They didn’t TEACH (or HELP) when their kids were having difficulty…
they just BLAMED THE KID for not already knowing better.
FUCK!!! It wasn’t even FUNNY!
Even on 9/11•2001 NEW YORK was blowing up, these women didn’t sit their kids down to explain what was really going on out there . . . . even when it was ALL OVER THE NEWS!! Instead, they told JOKES… pretended like it wasn’t happening…. and carried on with their HOME-EC , DANCE & ART classes like they were solving world hunger.
HOW THE FUCK DO YOU TEACH D-A-N-C-E WHEN PEOPLE ARE THROWING THEMSELVES FROM THE WORLD TRADE CENTER.
Only a woman would TEACH POTTERY, DANCE and ART on 9/11.
If school had a useless subject like SHOPPING,
these women would have TAUGHT THAT ON 9/11 TOO.
When I occasionally replaced the female teachers, all my students were practically BEGGING to have me as their full-time teacher.
8 - 12 years old, they would actually say shit to me like:
• ” We actually LEARN things in your class.”
• ” When are you coming back?”
• “You make us LIKE school.”
• “We liked you WAY better than any of our other teachers.”
But I simply HAD to quit.
And man . . . . am I ever glad I did.
I have a Man job now,
and my salary has multiplied a few times over.
I thank my personal GOD I am not still a teacher,
even though i REALLY AND TRULY pity the kids.
Fuckin’ Brutal.
Great article Dick.
And as usual . . . it’s hilarious because its’ ALL true.
Bravo! I think you mite just be one of the dumbest men alive. Your right infront of George w. bush. Clearly someone has a bit to much time on their hands Mr.Dick. Well Dick I would like to say by making this website you dont only sound like a total queer but im sure you look like one too. Without Women You Wouldnt be Alive right now = ] . And guess what the female race will never need you so i hope you stay a virgin the rest of your life!
Women as nurses…that could kill you as a man:
Post by obbop
http://tinyurl.com/5bl7ox
Perhaps getting back at those terrible males that have done her wrong for so many years or just another idiotic female allowed to be owner-less and given free reign to express herself in whatever manner her convoluted female mind desires?
Heck, the idiotic female herself likely doesn’t know.
“A former nurse accused of intentionally injecting bleach into two patients at a dialysis center was arrested Friday.
Two witnesses said they saw
Kimberly Clark Saenz, 34, draw bleach into syringes and inject it into two patients’ dialysis lines
at the DaVita Dialysis Center on April 28, Lufkin police said in a statement.
Both patients survived, but one required treatment at a hospital, police said.
Police said tests showed bleach in the syringes and dialysis lines.
Saenz, who remained in Angelina County jail Friday evening, is charged with two counts of aggravated assault.
Her bail was set at $200,000.
Saenz was fired from the center on April 29, a day after it was closed by authorities investigating the deaths of four patients in April.
Deathslayer