Terrorism!
Men are masters of terror. Men like Wes Craven and Stephen King.
Men are also better than women at terrorism.
Recently, a woman fucked up some terrorism so badly, she blew herself up in the middle of an empty street. That doesn’t surprise me. A woman once asked me if they always put fresh oil in during an oil change.
No, they buy some oil off eBay. Get a fucking clue.
Literally “oil change” means changing the oil in your car; just as literally “suicide bomber” means someone who whacks themselves with a vest made of plastique. Women don’t learn the point or purpose of anything. They just learn as much as they need to ask another stupid question or otherwise make a spectacle of themselves.
Here’s the suicide bomber story as I understood it from the newspaper. I don’t know why a woman being incompetent and trying to fuck up everyone’s day was considered news, but it was. Plenty of lady doctors fucked up today and none of them were in the paper.
A lady suicide bomber took a run at a bank in eastern Baghdad on Tuesday and was gunned down by Security Man Guards before getting close enough to detonate.
Here’s my question. How the fuck do you get caught suicide bombing when you’re wearing a big black tent around yourself? I have smuggled an entire eighteen pack into a concert wearing only bluejeans. If I was wearing a black mumu, I’d have been packing a stealth keg. Either the woman in question was already 250 pounds, so she looked like a stuffed Christmas ham bulging with dynamite running all over the street, or she got her suicide bombing directions mixed up. Women mix up directions all the time. That’s why they don’t think before they speak. They only think after you yell at them.
Or maybe in Baghdad women aren’t even allowed in banks. If that’s true, it only makes this sad spectacle that much more incompetent. If a bear was trying to get into my bathroom while I was taking a shit, I would sure as hell shoot it. Bears don’t belong in my bathroom. Therefore, if a bear is trying to get in there, it’s probably not got good things on its mind.
I’m awarding a trifecta of Man Points today. One for men, one for guns, and one for the troops.
How do you say G.I. Joke in Shiite?
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Feminism must be stopped. Female terrorists become so involved with their silly little girly “beliefs”, that there are men everywhere coming home to less tidy homes and a meal not quite ready. I for one, have had enough.
I saw an accident on the freeway yesterday. They were extricating the bodies when I got to the scene. Fool swerved into incoming traffic with a minivan. Just passed me like I was standing still 10 minutes earlier.
That’s how I’d like to go. Smacked against a tree at 120 mph.
Poor tree.
- Page One - Lemon Jelly’s
I’d probably just pop a cyanide pill or something and go peacefully ‘into the night’ as it were. I don’t think i could go through with your method of dying because… there would be nothing for me to buried, or I wouldn’t be respectable.
Also, nice name.
Well said, Odin.
-Dick
Women can not be suicide bombers because their concept of death involves “going peacefully in their sleep”, or “romantically dying in their lovers arms”. I’ve already planned how I would like to die, at the age of 50, so I’m not a health care burden, I will strap a land mine to my chest, and be kicked from a cliff onto jagged rocks. Now, if I were a woman, it would be over right then, but fortified by manliness, I will then drag myself through a forest for two weeks before falling to rabies contracted when I used a grizzly bear’s jaw to amputate one of my shattered limbs to make beef jerky. If your vision of your own demise isn’t similar, then you might as well put on a skirt and start frying some chicken.
men are better than women at suicide bombing. the only way to stop terrorism is to introduce women to it. I for one would introduce all of the femhagists to al qaeda training camp so that they can learn how to blow themselves up without hurting anyone else in the process.
Oh right, my mistake. There are female terrorists. Called ‘feminists’.
It’s right there :). And your story is just normal feminist bulltripe. ‘I made a bunch of men look silly. You should all worship me!’ and so on. Men make women look silly all the time. I dont see all of you worshipping us.
Spot on with the terrorism.. Ever heard of a female terrorist?
I think I know why she got caught/shot.
She fucked every last one of the Security Man Guards. During several of the fuck sessions, she undoubtedly got emotional and started revealing her plans. I know women usually keep secrets, but when they can use them to get sympathy/fucked, GREEN LIGHT!
Wolfe, good point on equal rights.
A good trifecta of manpoints, Dick. I agree entirely with you on bears in the bathroom. I’d go further. Even if a bear was trying to get into my bathroom while I was merely taking a piss, I’d still shoot it.
The gunning down of female suicide bombers is something that I assume all feminists applaud. Finally, women are achieving equality of opportunity in the suicide bombing market, and, these days, there always seem to be job openings.
-wolfe
Ooops!
I’m so silly.
Such a blonde!
I put ‘commas’ where ‘periods’ should rightly be placed.
Oh well
Hey!
Where is my “Only cunts, Yankee cunts especially, moderate comments” comment?
Only cunts moderate comments. Yankee cunts especially.
I used to put used oil in the penis extensions of male clients.
They were too busy looking at my teats to notice.
They paid and tipped! When they realised what I had done, “She’s a dumb blonde, what does she know? Nice rack though!” I laughed all the way to the bank.
Some of us of the Homogametic persuassion have Pussy Control and use it for endless diversional mirth.
Get a fucking clue!