The World is Round, Bitch
20% of the co-hosts on The View don’t know the world is round.
I must confess a loss of 280 Man Points for being surprised at this. The View is hot-boxed nonsense incarnate. The View is what happens when you tell five prison inmates to host a two hour television program on what to do with an unconscious woman and a cell phone. Except in this case, the unconscious woman is “reason” and “accountability”, and the cell phone is that fucking coffee table.
I bet you 280 Man Points their answer isn’t going to be “call the police”.
Sherri Sheppherd, who I will be referring to as Jabba the Hut for the remainder of this article — not only because she looks exactly like him if you’re watching Star Wars on a black and white TV, but also because she makes about as much sense — recently uttered the following:
“Is the world flat? I’ve never thought about it…I’ll tell you what I have thought about. How I’m going to feed my child. How I’m going to take care of my family!” - Sherri fucking Sheppherd, The View
No you haven’t, Jabba. You don’t know how to feed or raise your kids, and let me explain why.
If you don’t know that the world is round, there’s a significant chance you also aren’t familiar with a wealth of other scientific facts birthed from the minds of men since we invented our first wheel.
Prayer does not cure whooping cough.
Unplugging a smoke detector makes it stop working.
Racing a train is a bad idea.
Leaving babies in the car whilst you’re shopping kills them.
Spit-shinning a fork doesn’t make it clean.
Building your credit does not mean using your credit card like a drunken sailor and ignoring the bills.
Jesus will not take the fucking wheel.
This remark Herculean in its stupidity. It’s so far beyond dumb that I’m appalled by the lack of reaction from The View’s mouth-frothing, piggy fan base. And that’s exactly why I’ve lost my Man Points, my friends. I’ve been surprised. Surprised out of 280 Man Points by a 280lbs. dumb-fuck.
For all you students out there, learn these lessons well. Never expect a woman to know the Earth is round. Never expect her to know a sagging roof with water dripping from it is about to crash in and fuck everything up. Never expect her to know her tire is flat just because someone’s left a note on her dash saying, “Your tire is flat and park in one spot next time, you stupid twat!” Never expect her to know she’s overreacting. Never expect her to know she’s embarrassed you, and most especially, never expect her to know she’s embarrassed herself.
Jabba the Hut claims this swan dive into the Lake of Stupid was nothing more than a “senior brain-poopy moment.” Wrong again, Jabba. It was a senior brain-diptheria moment. If you combined all the cases of diarrhea in Africa every year and gave them to one British guy who had just eaten 100 burritos in a row with extra hot sauce, that is level of magnitude on the scale of shit for which this “senior moment” must be placed.
Dick’s Shit Scale
Locking your Keys in your car: “poopy.”
Forgetting to pick your kids up at school: “shitty.”
Crashing a train into an oil tanker: “just one shit short of not knowing the Earth is round.”
Obviously, women are going to let her get away with this nonsense because why shouldn’t she be able to speak her mind? All women think something equally as dumb everyday. It’s “dogs have souls” today and “12 is too young to be a super model” tomorrow. The only thing that stays the same is that I don’t fucking care.
Sherri Sheppherd is a worse embarrassment to black people than OJ Simpson. If you don’t agree with that, you’re a woman. Fuck off my site.
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I have seen that particular clip and I don’t honestly have words. The magnitude of such stupidity is best put by Dick himself…
Notice how they all call god a MAN! I’m not religious, but that answers a lot of questions does it not…
Whoopi Goldberg is dumber than a fucking 20-lb bag of shit. She is absolutely the worst “comedian” ever and she can’t articulate for shit. She is the affirmative action employee that you can’t shitcan no matter how bad she screws up. Christ, I wouldn’t hire her to shovel shit out of my garden.
Women love The View. Those of us that work for a living know it’s a big round of horseshit.
This is a case of fucked up education.
And the fact that yes, in fact, she is dumbshit.
[...] 5. Jesus was a man Whether or not you believe in Jesus, there is one fact you can’t argue with: he was a man. No religion anywhere has ever put a woman in charge of shit. That’s called dogma — man-dogma — and it means men are better than women. those are my favorite quotes along with this whole page The World is Round, Bitch [...]
I enjoy reading your posts, keep them coming
Who left the door open, and let all there fucking INSECTS in here ?
even though shes a wimmin i think shes right….the VEIW? thats like a show ab9out whales with feelings…………very sad…..
That is not what she meant by it.
Whoopi was saying that scientists have given evidence of evolution, and the other woman said she does not believe in evolution, Whoopi was making a point by saying that people believed the world was flat, but it was proved otherwise, just as people believe God created everything, but it has had other theories i.e. evolution.
If you’re stupid, you’re stupid. It has nothing to do with being a woman or a man. Though everybody has stupid moments due to ignorance or miscalculations. Still, you are truly an idiot and that has nothing to do with you being male.
For some fun:
Sherri Sheppherd’s position as a speaker on “The View” has put her statements out on the public forum, specifically in this format, as anecdotal material to use as reference for the state of the female intellect. By default, then, one might assume that celebrities represent the best our society has to offer, and accurately portray male and female intelligence levels.
One might reason, then, that male celebrities also represent the best in male intellectual achievement.
Boy, are we in trouble:
Shaquille O’Neal on whether he had visited the Parthenon during his visit to Greece: “I can’t really remember the names of all the clubs that we went to.”
New Orleans Saint RB George Rogers when asked about the upcoming season…”I want to rush for 1,000 or 1,500 yards, whichever comes first.”
1982 - Chuck Nevitt, North Carolina State basketball player, explaining to coach Jim Valvano why he appeared nervous at practice: “My sister’s expecting a baby, and I don’t know if I’m going to be an uncle or an aunt.”
“I haven’t committed a crime. What I did was fail to comply with the law.”
- David Dinkins, New York City Mayor answering accusations that he failed to pay his taxes.
“I don’t think anybody should write his autobiography until after he’s dead.” — Samuel Goldwyn
A zebra does not change its spots. - Al Gore 1991 (and again in 1992)
Bill Clinton - “If I were a single man, I might ask that mummy out. That’s a good-looking mommy.”
R.Kelly - “All of a sudden you’re like the Bin Laden of America. Osama Bin Laden is the only one who knows what I’m going through.”
You know, for such an intelligent fellow, it’s remarkable really that he doesn’t know diptheria from diarrea.
In truth, I really do believe that he is a “glutton for punishment,” in that he seeks, and sees, only what he wishes to see in women. That way he doesn’t have to face the fact that he’s a pretty miserable excuse for a man, and insecure as hell. He has no true wit, only vulgarity and hostility, and relies upon those excessively in order to get his “points” across.
In the end, he rather reminds me of a pimple on the backside. You don’t encounter one too often, and when you do, it’s irritating as hell. However, it generally quickly fades, and is soon forgotten.
*Dishes out bagload of manpoints!*
Extremely well said.
To the ladies who say,
“quit hangingaroundthe dumb ones and start hanging around the smarter yet nicer girls…like us”
1.) Smarter? You can’t even put together a grammatically correct sentence!
2.) The problem is that girls are so ignorant, they think that men are just “hanging around the wrong women”, and actually believe that they personally are “The right women”. Same shit, different day ladies.
Do you really think that “Dick Masterson” is such a glutton for punishment that he intentionally hangs around with stupid women? Do you think he hates himself so much, that he punishes himself daily by purposely conversing with the shallow and the ignorant? No.
He sees it everywhere he goes, in ALL women, and it’s driving him insane.
It’s driving me insane too.
Ladies, if you have such a problem with what he is saying on this site, put together a cogent argument before you embarrass yourself, and waste his bandwidth. Consider just for a second that you might be wrong, and he might be right. Ponder this. Think of reasons for both sides of the argument. Then, type your response into a spell checker, and correct your grammar.
I am confident that if you use logic and reason, and leave your emotions out of your arguments, Dick Masterson might actually listen to what you have to say.
But don’t try to insult him, because he is more clever, and more witty than you. All guys are. Why do you think 99% of stand up comedians are men?
Men are better than women at both intelligence and stupidity. The proportion of Men that have a high level of intelligence is quite a bit more than women. However it’s the same at the other end of the scale as well.
I agree. Many people have good hearts, and care for the welfare of others. This is a laudable trait to have. Intelligence is a good thing, however it’s not the ONLY thing that people should be judged by. Sympathy, empathy, mercy and compassion are all virtues that people should strive for.
Don’t worry. I reject violence as a solution for anything. I’ve often used the line in the past to refer to people’s overt stupidity. That was the case here.
Seemed too vicious for me. Surprised myself.
Wait… you’re one of the smarter ones? How many grammatical and typographical errors can you count? Can you count? Why don’t you try hitting the shift button before you begin to tout your intellect, genius.
Oh, also, “smarter yet nicer” = “fat.”
Nah. After all, you only have to punch information into a computer ONCE, right?
Y-defs like the unfucked “Kristina” are slow learners. Punch away.
…
*turns to blueRAP*
You think I maybe went over the top?
I have a term for people like you kristina.
Would-be rape victims.
Nice future you got there. I hope they slit your throat afterwards and leave you bleeding in the shit filled toilet of a gas station naked being displayed LIKE THE WHORE YOU ARE!!!
Okaaay, She’s about 13.
17, but close.
*yawn* that was the silliest insult you’ve ever said.
Quite true that. Almost made sense. Then this.
Egotistic much?
…What the FUCK are you doing here then? You’re fucking with us, and whining to us, and trying to use us.
As Liquid Snake would say ‘That’s it. I’m done’*walks off*
I am trying to fuck with you? How? Gee, I’ll try to keep the whining down. (Rolls eyes, like the teenager I am)
Actually I did catch whatwhoopi was saying, but that other woman was being serious I think, What_.
Um, It everyone missed what they were talking about. The hole ‘is the world flat?’ conversation wasnt a real question. Whoopi or whoever tried to relate someone not believing in evolution becaues you cant ’see’ it to not knowing it the earth is truely round, because youve never ’seen’ that either. It seemed to just go over the ladies head.
And ‘blessing’?
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAA
You stupid bitch, you think God controls things like luck?
Luck is a man and woman thing.
Quite true that. Almost made sense. Then this.
Egotistic much?
…What the FUCK are you doing here then? You’re fucking with us, and whining to us, and trying to use us.
As Liquid Snake would say ‘That’s it. I’m done’*walks off*
Reminds me of a show over here called ‘Loose Women’.
Basicly the same thing I believe.
Honestly, do you see shows ‘What Men Think?’ or ‘Loose men’?
No because we’re above that shit of acting like performing monkeys.
*tosses banana to kristina* Dance monkey, dance.
Okaaay, She’s about 13.
I think you should lose an additional 280 points for even watching The View. I’ve been bored before, Dick but…The View? Really?? There had to have been SOMETHING on ESPN.
It’s true Tom, we do have quite a few simpletons in our sex. But I must admit, there are quite a few simpleton men, as well. I have the need to say though, it isn’t about how “smart” you are at spelling, or talking, or math-it is who you are on the inside. I know a guy who enjoys spelling hey hay, and who also can’t spell come right (cum), but he is also a really great guy who cares forpeople other than himself.
That’s what counts in life in the end…(go ahead men, laugh it up on my “feministic” view)
wow, not trying to like hate on women or anything but if I’m wrong in saying that men had discussed this on a much more intelligent level like hundreds of years ago then, then you can take hundreds of points from me if you’d like……….ya, the fact that it took some women hundreds of years to talk about this is kind of funny, and that it was on national television!!!!! WOW
now be nice Mike…she had some good points in her rebuffal…You men go out with these rotten horrid girls who we nice girls probably beat up for spouting off shit they dont know about…which we do just for fun too
Yes, that is quite a problem isn’t it.
Amazing. You could replace Ms. Sheppherd and no one would notice.
In a different way, yes.
lol isnt it a beautiful word savant??
I repeat…. twatwaffles?
aww amen sister! you silly men…see heres yor problem! quit hangingaroundthe dumb ones and start hanging around the smarter yet nicer girls…like jadedblessing and me….we dont fuck with guys…use them or whine to them…
….twatwaffles?
“Jesus will not take the fucking wheel.”
The quote of the day.
Yep, he’s not your fucking cruise control, bitch!
As stupid as the woman made herself look, you made yourself look like a complete jackass by this article. If THOSE are the types of women you know, then dude, who is the fucking moron hanging around such idiotic twats? Hmmmm?
You’re about as bright as a wooden post and slightly less clever. The problem with the internet is moronic twatwaffles like you get a voice.
So are you smart enough to know when you’ve embarassed YOURSELF?!
@Dick, I beleive you have here, a great candidate for “classic Dick”. My favorite article, hands down.
And what a surprise. “This video has been removed for “terms of use violation.” It’s just like Vaginacom’s removal of Britney’s “spectacular” performance at the VMAs. American women can’t admit they are wrong, so they have the guys at the top remove it. As we all know, “if I can’t see it, it isn’t there.”
Women’s logic: If I jump off a cliff, but feel that I’m flying, than I’m ACTUALLY flying.
Men’s logic: …who the fuck has time to jump off a cliff, and why would you even if you had the time?
My friend’s moms always told me, “if your friends jumped off a cliff, would you?” Of course I wouldn’t. It’s a rediculous concept. I hung out with boys, because at that age girls have cooties. Boys don’t jump off cliffs. We were too busy building things, and than destroying them to build bigger and better.
Girls were too busy backstabbing each other, and gagglefucking to the restrooms in one big group of mommy’s mascara. Little girls WOULD come up with the idea of jumping off a cliff. And then yes, they would follow each other off.
-400 man-points for the dudes at Viacom, for not having a sense of humor.
+50 vagina-points at the chick for not knowing the world is flat.
+5 man points at Wolfe for the insight on Jabba.
+a buncha points for the rad article.
Doubt,
If they saved the boob job money for college maybe they’d know the world is round.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RiuOucQyjoA
http://www.youtube
(DOT)
com/watch?v=RiuOucQyjoA
WATCH IT WATCH IT
FUCK MAN WATCH THIS
JUST JESUS FUCKING CHRIST SOMEONE GAS THIS CUNT
Aw, Dick, you get 280 man points just for being able to admit to your “manstake”
Want to see more women’ stupidity? Watch http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=43Ub_Emxfek or go to youtube and on the search field type “garbageman sonata”
TYPICAL!!!
Dick, I really think this comparison is rude, unfair, and utterly uncalled for.
Jabba was a highly successful businessman with a small weight problem. He managed pioneering work in the field of labor relations with his female employees, and experimented with highly innovative means of reducing taxes payable.
It could fairly be said that capitalists like Jabba probably did more to destabilize the Empire than a bunch of mystic hippies running around with long hair and itchy trigger fingers.
Comparing him to Sherri Sheppherd — or any woman on The View — is just cruel to Jabba.
-wolfe
Hey Dick,
280 Man Points for being surprised at women’s stupidity and 100x more for watching The View.
How about being surprised at the fact that 40-44 million adults are at the lowest levels of literacy in the US? (Either they are women or their teachers were women). I’ll vote for the next candidate who prohibits women from being teachers.
So a 280lbs women is wondering how she will feed her children? Obviously she has no problems feeding herself.
Thome: I believe we do have a similar program here in England, called “Loose Women”. Does the title seem redundant to you? It does to me.
I’ve never watched it personally, but am aware of its existence: some women sit around talking about “topical issues” (i.e. shoes, kittens) with, I can only assume, the same degree of stupidity as those on “The View”.
For entertainment, I’d take Jeremy Kyle any day.
The real problem here is not that she said such a stupid thing, but really what was she doing out of the kitchen? :P haha
The view seems like a truly scary program, we have nothing like that here in England. Thank god. Still, i suppose it offers a source of entertainment.^^
20% Of The View DonÂ’t Know The World Is Round…
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