The World is Round, Bitch
20% of the co-hosts on The View don’t know the world is round.
I must confess a loss of 280 Man Points for being surprised at this. The View is hot-boxed nonsense incarnate. The View is what happens when you tell five prison inmates to host a two hour television program on what to do with an unconscious woman and a cell phone. Except in this case, the unconscious woman is “reason” and “accountability”, and the cell phone is that fucking coffee table.
I bet you 280 Man Points their answer isn’t going to be “call the police”.
Sherri Sheppherd, who I will be referring to as Jabba the Hut for the remainder of this article — not only because she looks exactly like him if you’re watching Star Wars on a black and white TV, but also because she makes about as much sense — recently uttered the following:
“Is the world flat? I’ve never thought about it…I’ll tell you what I have thought about. How I’m going to feed my child. How I’m going to take care of my family!” - Sherri fucking Sheppherd, The View
No you haven’t, Jabba. You don’t know how to feed or raise your kids, and let me explain why.
If you don’t know that the world is round, there’s a significant chance you also aren’t familiar with a wealth of other scientific facts birthed from the minds of men since we invented our first wheel.
Prayer does not cure whooping cough.
Unplugging a smoke detector makes it stop working.
Racing a train is a bad idea.
Leaving babies in the car whilst you’re shopping kills them.
Spit-shinning a fork doesn’t make it clean.
Building your credit does not mean using your credit card like a drunken sailor and ignoring the bills.
Jesus will not take the fucking wheel.
This remark Herculean in its stupidity. It’s so far beyond dumb that I’m appalled by the lack of reaction from The View’s mouth-frothing, piggy fan base. And that’s exactly why I’ve lost my Man Points, my friends. I’ve been surprised. Surprised out of 280 Man Points by a 280lbs. dumb-fuck.
For all you students out there, learn these lessons well. Never expect a woman to know the Earth is round. Never expect her to know a sagging roof with water dripping from it is about to crash in and fuck everything up. Never expect her to know her tire is flat just because someone’s left a note on her dash saying, “Your tire is flat and park in one spot next time, you stupid twat!” Never expect her to know she’s overreacting. Never expect her to know she’s embarrassed you, and most especially, never expect her to know she’s embarrassed herself.
Jabba the Hut claims this swan dive into the Lake of Stupid was nothing more than a “senior brain-poopy moment.” Wrong again, Jabba. It was a senior brain-diptheria moment. If you combined all the cases of diarrhea in Africa every year and gave them to one British guy who had just eaten 100 burritos in a row with extra hot sauce, that is level of magnitude on the scale of shit for which this “senior moment” must be placed.
Dick’s Shit Scale
Locking your Keys in your car: “poopy.”
Forgetting to pick your kids up at school: “shitty.”
Crashing a train into an oil tanker: “just one shit short of not knowing the Earth is round.”
Obviously, women are going to let her get away with this nonsense because why shouldn’t she be able to speak her mind? All women think something equally as dumb everyday. It’s “dogs have souls” today and “12 is too young to be a super model” tomorrow. The only thing that stays the same is that I don’t fucking care.
Sherri Sheppherd is a worse embarrassment to black people than OJ Simpson. If you don’t agree with that, you’re a woman. Fuck off my site.
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*turns to blueRAP*
You think I maybe went over the top?
I have a term for people like you kristina.
Would-be rape victims.
Nice future you got there. I hope they slit your throat afterwards and leave you bleeding in the shit filled toilet of a gas station naked being displayed LIKE THE WHORE YOU ARE!!!
Okaaay, She’s about 13.
17, but close.
*yawn* that was the silliest insult you’ve ever said.
Quite true that. Almost made sense. Then this.
Egotistic much?
…What the FUCK are you doing here then? You’re fucking with us, and whining to us, and trying to use us.
As Liquid Snake would say ‘That’s it. I’m done’*walks off*
I am trying to fuck with you? How? Gee, I’ll try to keep the whining down. (Rolls eyes, like the teenager I am)
Actually I did catch whatwhoopi was saying, but that other woman was being serious I think, What_.
Um, It everyone missed what they were talking about. The hole ‘is the world flat?’ conversation wasnt a real question. Whoopi or whoever tried to relate someone not believing in evolution becaues you cant ’see’ it to not knowing it the earth is truely round, because youve never ’seen’ that either. It seemed to just go over the ladies head.
And ‘blessing’?
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAA
You stupid bitch, you think God controls things like luck?
Luck is a man and woman thing.
Quite true that. Almost made sense. Then this.
Egotistic much?
…What the FUCK are you doing here then? You’re fucking with us, and whining to us, and trying to use us.
As Liquid Snake would say ‘That’s it. I’m done’*walks off*
Reminds me of a show over here called ‘Loose Women’.
Basicly the same thing I believe.
Honestly, do you see shows ‘What Men Think?’ or ‘Loose men’?
No because we’re above that shit of acting like performing monkeys.
*tosses banana to kristina* Dance monkey, dance.
Okaaay, She’s about 13.
I think you should lose an additional 280 points for even watching The View. I’ve been bored before, Dick but…The View? Really?? There had to have been SOMETHING on ESPN.
It’s true Tom, we do have quite a few simpletons in our sex. But I must admit, there are quite a few simpleton men, as well. I have the need to say though, it isn’t about how “smart” you are at spelling, or talking, or math-it is who you are on the inside. I know a guy who enjoys spelling hey hay, and who also can’t spell come right (cum), but he is also a really great guy who cares forpeople other than himself.
That’s what counts in life in the end…(go ahead men, laugh it up on my “feministic” view)
wow, not trying to like hate on women or anything but if I’m wrong in saying that men had discussed this on a much more intelligent level like hundreds of years ago then, then you can take hundreds of points from me if you’d like……….ya, the fact that it took some women hundreds of years to talk about this is kind of funny, and that it was on national television!!!!! WOW
now be nice Mike…she had some good points in her rebuffal…You men go out with these rotten horrid girls who we nice girls probably beat up for spouting off shit they dont know about…which we do just for fun too
Yes, that is quite a problem isn’t it.
Amazing. You could replace Ms. Sheppherd and no one would notice.
In a different way, yes.
lol isnt it a beautiful word savant??
I repeat…. twatwaffles?
aww amen sister! you silly men…see heres yor problem! quit hangingaroundthe dumb ones and start hanging around the smarter yet nicer girls…like jadedblessing and me….we dont fuck with guys…use them or whine to them…
….twatwaffles?
“Jesus will not take the fucking wheel.”
The quote of the day.
Yep, he’s not your fucking cruise control, bitch!
As stupid as the woman made herself look, you made yourself look like a complete jackass by this article. If THOSE are the types of women you know, then dude, who is the fucking moron hanging around such idiotic twats? Hmmmm?
You’re about as bright as a wooden post and slightly less clever. The problem with the internet is moronic twatwaffles like you get a voice.
So are you smart enough to know when you’ve embarassed YOURSELF?!