Top Ten Reasons Men Are Better Than Women
MenAreBetterThanWomen.com reached 200,000 visitors early this morning, so I thought I would mark the occasion by posting a very special top ten list of the top ten ways in which men are better than women.
Naturally as a man the moment I thought of an idea I set to work implementing it — in this case by writing it. It would have been exactly the same if my idea had been the wheel or the Hoover Dam. That’s because I’m a man and instead of taking shit from the world around me, I can shove shit right back into it as well.
Dick’s Top Ten Reasons MenAreBetterThanWomen.com
10. Men do not have Tourette Syndrome
I believe all women suffer from a mild and extremely localized form of Tourette Syndrome. The afflicted organ? Their tongues. That’s why women cannot shut their fucking mouths for ten seconds while adults are speaking around them. Their tongues are battling around in their mouths like drunken Vipers.
9. Men are not sponges
Women are social chameleons — or better yet: social vampires. Women walk into a situation and before you know it they’ve completely changed their wardrobe and mannerisms as if they’ve joined a fucking cult. Men are not sheep. Everyone knows the word for a female sheep is ewe, but what about the male word? There isn’t one because sheep is something men are not.
8. Women are racists
Women’s entire lives and social circles are based around hatred. Do they hate their boyfriends? Do they hate their wardrobe? Do they hate each other? Yes, yes and fuck definitely. Men don’t go in for that silly sort of nonsense. If we’re dissatisfied, we pick up and move out. Or we take our mighty man muscles and lift fucking mountains so the world looks exactly the way we want it to. Men do more world changing before 9:00 AM than any woman ever has done in her whole life.
7. Men live less than women
The last thing a society needs is a bunch of non-contributing members laying around and sucking all the juice from the young. Men know this so they blast off from birth like shooting man stars — burning out ten years faster, but setting the whole night ablaze with manness. Women just kind of lie around like big fat pigs in big fat puddles of shit. Congratulations women. You really earned those rights!
6. Men write illegibly
Writing is stupid and an ineffective way to communicate. Men know this so they don’t give a shit about handwriting things with big hoops and loops and squiggles and shit so aliens can read notes about remembering to pick up your birth control pills after 6th period from space.
5. Jesus was a man
Whether or not you believe in Jesus, there is one fact you can’t argue with: he was a man. No religion anywhere has ever put a woman in charge of shit. That’s called dogma — man-dogma — and it means men are better than women.
4. Men wear watches
Do you know why men wear watches? It’s because there’s a limited amount of time in the day and men need to know how much of it there is so they can efficiently allocate their man ass kicking for the day. Women don’t wear watches; they wear bracelets. Women wearing bracelets is like dropping a bus of retarded kids off in front of a taffy pulling machine. They can just stare for hours and never get bored.
A watch says, ‘Get up and go! Move your man ass and take care of your fucking man business!’ That’s why 60 minutes uses a ticking watch for its theme song. ‘Important shit is going down and we’re about to talk about it in a fucking fastidious manner, so get the fuck ready,’ says a ticking watch. A bracelet says, ‘You’re most likely ugly, but look at how much money you’re worth!’ What a joke.
3. Boys destroy things
The only thing that has ever lifted our species out of the trees where we came from is our ability to destroy. Take paper: the cornerstone of the modern world. That was invented because man wanted to destroy trees and beat them into pulp. How about nuclear power? Men invented that too. Men are natural destructors. We pop right out of the man-womb and start on a life-long tirade of progress by tearing down the Earth with our mighty, man-manly man-fists. Goddammit, that’s awesome!
2. Marriage is stupid
Marriage is 100% the fault of women. It was invented by men though! Did you know that? Marriage was invented because women were too busy whoring it out to fuck the only the guy who was paying their rent and feeding their fat asses French bon-bons every day. Men invented marriage as a way of telling women who they could and couldn’t fuck. Like everything else men have ever invented, it completely worked and worked way better than any man thought it would. Women became so indoctrinated by the man-invention of marriage that they’re fucking obsessed with it.
Marriage is still stupid. It’s a stupid game invented to entertain stupid minds and to teach basic lessons of fidelity that even invertebrates are born with.
1. Men have penises
When it comes to being a man, being quick at identifying problems is tantamount to fixing them. In fact it’s tantamount-ier. Having a penis — in other words looking like a man and having man parts — is a man’s way of telling other men, ‘Hey. Look at me. I’m a man. I won’t fuck up whatever it is that you’re trying to do. If you need some help, maybe ask me and I’ll see if I can lend a man-hand. It’s the least I could do to be fucking courteous.’
Men Are Better Than Women.
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meow
This guy is so fucking awesome. He has such a comically brilliant persona that he’s able to say awesome shit like this and people actually believe him. To all the bitches out there whining about “herf derf sexism! man is pig” shut the fuck up and read this, I guaran-FUCKING-tee this guy is joking, but you hoes are too goddamn stupid to realize t. Which in a way proves his jokes to be correct.
now, go put on your hip stylish skinny jeans hahaha fucking stupid. >.>
i love how these females spend the majority of their day gossiping or on the phone, watching t.v and obeying propaganda, dolling themselves up trying to find a mate to breed with or simply sitting on their arses, and then think they can come here (or on any other thread on the net) with anything semi intelligent to say. everybody nowadays thinks their so smart XD lame. please just stop, your just embarassing yourselves
peace out my nig yo, word is bomb son fo sho. fucking slow brainwashed bitches, go watch american idol now like i know you do, stupid bitch… *smiley face
Im a guy and I really think you must be gay. You seem to really prefer men to women. So if you wanna go get yourself a nice boyfriend then go do that but the rest of the world doesn’t want to hear about it so shut up.
I know right? Do you think he’s ever had a girlfriend?
Female
Female (But took trouble to write properly)
you think dick must be gay? well your an idiot. do you not see how brilliant his ideas are? he is not saying he hates women he is saying that men are better. men are stronger they are faster and they are smarter. compare all the things a woman has invented to what a man has. it is obvious to see that men have invented all the great technologies that we have right now.
Men like him for who he is, he is the only guy with enough balls to say these kinds of things to the public because we all know its true
This is by far the dumbest thing ive ever read. you must be miserable, bored & single. Good luck man
Tsipa, men like this are almost NEVER miserable, bored, and tend to be single by choice. There are plenty of dumb fucking women out there to lap it up. It may not be like reading Herodotus or the US Constitution, but how many people do you know have really read those from front to back anyway? What I am trying to say is: at that the very, very, least it is incredibly entertaining. Especially when you realize some of the dumb fucking men might actually really believe AND agree with the stuff here.
I am happy to tell you that you would be dismayed by the number that do.
I’ll let you into a little secret, this is just the beginning…
No, I wouldn’t be dismayed AT ALL. There are MILLIONS of dumb fucking people in the world.
this bitch is still going on?
Yep.
I don’t care if you call me Vagina, Virgina, bitch, slut, whore, vampire LOL…because as long as dumb ass men have dumb ass cocks, I will always have a dumb ass man in my life. I don’t move mountains before 9am, because I have a big dumb ass man to do it for me :)
Big Dumb Ass Man: Baby, you want that mountain here?
Me: No, sweetheart, a little to the left please.
Big Dumb Ass Man: Here?
Me: Hmm, a little more to the left.
Big Dumb Ass Man: Here?
Me: Too far over, a little to the right now.
Big Dumb Ass Man: Here?
Me: Baby, that is perfect! I can’t believe you moved that great big mountain all by yourself! You are so big and strong:)
I think I am a more effective misandrist than you will ever make as a misogynist. What’s that? You don’t know what a misandrist is??? Google it, you big dumb fuck.
Oh yeah, by the way thanks for this website, it has given me quite a chuckle. I love you Big Dumb Ass Men:) The hijinks you idiots get up to when you make a website is really fucking amusing.
Cunt.
yeah, I am a cunt. A smart fucking cunt. I put the cunt in country. I am so fucking smart, I make the smartest men I know feel fucking retarded.
“I make the smartest men I know feel fucking retarded.”
Well, you should get out more then.
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA…oh God, you are too funny! Is Watcher Dick Masterson? I am going to have to call you Richard. I like dicks too much to do them such a disservice.
So you’ve learned another role to play, and convinced a man desperate enough to beleive it. What happens when your one card: good looks, begins to fade with age. Your boobs begin to sag, your ass turns square, and your skin begins to wrinkle. What then? That once nice peice of ass has no purpose to serve for the type of man you’re speaking of. He’s moving that mountain for your pussy, not for you.
The men I know can at least fucking spell. There is spell check on this website you dumb motherfucker.
What about those men who do move mountains? You think we’re dumb? We’re the ones moving the mountains… You guys think you have us tricked, but so long as your playing this specific game you speak of in your fantasy skit, you damn well better have some sort of looks to back it up. Otherwise, we’ll get bord of dealing with your delusional “i’m in control for reasons other than being attractive” and move on to a newer, less sour piece of ass. What do you do then?
By the way, only a dumbass that doesn’t speak womenish could ever be tricked into believing someone such as you is a good catch. Do you think throwing your emotions at an intelligent real man as hard as you can, and as soon as he opens up you start the succubus process, really works on any REAL man? No, it doesn’t cunt. A real man would sense your neediness in an instance, and even if you were a hot piece of ass, look at right through you as if you weren’t even there.
No matter how old or tattered I look, there will be an old tattered man with his teeth on the bedside table right next to mine.
That’s no way to talk about your father.
Actually, I was talking about yours…Guess who is inheriting everything Jr??? I am.
Makes sense. My father has been dead 10 years, I suppose when your THAT desperate you get it where you can find it.
Let’s face facts; when you die your only mourners will be your inbred collection of mangy cats.
Sorry you had to find out this way why you weren’t in the will. If makes you feel better I will give you $10 so you can get your hair trimmed. It looks a little long, or do you cut it so short to hide male pattern baldness?
Let’s face facts: when you die you won’t even have an inbred collection of mangy cats to mourn you.
Oh and ta ta for now…I will be back later with a big fucking spatula to peel you off the ceiling. It is probably hard typing from there.
Ah, shows use of mimicry and parody.
You’re not as stupid as I thought (or best testing would indicate).
Peel me off the ceiling? and you were doing so well before reverted back to gibberish again…
Good effort though.
*reverting*
Watcher: you have been fun too. Nothing healthier than good fun banter with the sleeves rolled up. Now get your ass to the gym and stay away from McDonald’s, I would hate for you to die too young and miss another opportunity to argue with you.
Oh and BTW Watcher: I could write a better top 10 list than that…yours is actually insulting to men. Writing? Really? You had to use the way men write as an example? Have you read any good graphic novels lately or seen any good political satire cartoons? Mostly written by men who have excellent penmanship. Jesus was a man, yeah but he sure as shit wasn’t a fighter! I know women who have been in child birth longer than he was on the cross. So, please don’t hurt your elbow patting yourself on the back too much. I could write a top ten list because the best men I know or know of, have always humbled me because of their humbleness. Examples, Martin Luther King, Jr., Abraham Lincoln, my dad, my uncle Dave, my uncle Steve, my uncle Johnny, my grandfather, Gandhi. You are really shorting men in general if you want to stand by your top ten list. Grow a pair, and write one that is actually thoughtful and thought out.
that shows exactly how worthless women are, and why we don’t respect them.
Well we all know that men have short fucking rulers, that is why they all think their cocks are so fucking big. So, I don’t need a man to measure my worth.
wowwwwwwwwwwwwww. Interesting. This kinda stuff makes me laugh Considering I’m a woman in the Marine Corps and there are a pretty good amount of guys whose ass I could kick, just because your a man doesn’t prove anything. Plus, your comments on writing are completely ignorant. Your pretty lucky that this country allows freedom of speech so you can post your sexist bullshit out there for people to see. Way to go.
Wow, a girl playing dress-up in soldiers clothes.
The closest you’re ever going to get to a fire fight is on an Xbox, but hey, don’t let that stop you thinking you really are a ‘warrior’.
Enemies of the free world beware! As soon as Jena has finished putting ‘Hello Kitty’ stickers on her kit, she will kick your asses!
From the back of an APC…
Surrounded by ACTUAL warriors…
From the safety of camp…
Good to hear, contribution. But at the same time, fully masculinized institutions musculinize those that enter it. My Point? Men that aren’t gay don’t go to beauty school. So either you’re a lesbian, or what’s killing you inside is your career.
[...] Top Ten Reasons Men Are Better Than Women [...]
I just wanted to say, that the top ten reasons men are better than woman just proved how stupid you actually are. Yes a female sheep is called a ewe….a male sheep is called a ram. I feel really sad for you that you feel this way and actually take time out of your day to express such hatred towards woman. But everyone is an indivisiual whether your a man, woman, child, black, white, asian or whatever nothing makes someone better than someone else. Yes I could get angry at what you have said. But I am happy to be me and it does not bother me what negative things you have to say. I hope that one day you will come to your senses and find a lovely girl who will look past all this and be happy. Obviously you have been misled as a child or something to feel this way. Chances are your going to die a sad lonely old man, with his website looking for attention.
I actually want to thankyou because you have actually brightened up my day, because I know that nothing you have said has actually had any value and has had no affect on my mood in any way. It just makes me feel more happy about the positive person I am. I dont hate anyone because it takes to much energy to hate someone, I just feel really sorry for you.
Now im going to click exit from this website and not even have a second thought about this websites sad little existence and the sad thing is you will keep coming back here saying the same old rubbish with no true value day after day. I hope that others will do the same :)
Men like to use their physical strength as proof that they are the better sex, but I have some interesting scientific information for you said males who think muscles make you superior. Women and men are getting closer and closer to the same size. Women have started getting taller while men are still the same. Thier is no evolutionary reason for them to be bigger anymore, so that difference is slwly disapearing. So in a couple hundred year from now when we are all equal in strength, where will you natural selection arguement be? Women score higher on tests, more women are in college, and every year men seem to be becoming bigger idiots. By 2500, I think the world will be a very different, where suggesting your better will be even more ridiculous than it is now. And it is pretty fucking ridiculous now.
Useless piece of shit post meant for trash can
Women wearing high-heels does not make them ‘taller’, just unbalanced.
Really cuz I’m 5ft 9in, a female height unheard of 50 years ago, and most men are still 6ft….it’s scientic, I know because I am in college and a Biology and Evolutionary major, and one day I’m going to be a doctor, so obviously you are wrong the one, and natural selection is picking the female sex to evolve faster, coinsidence? I think not. The sex actually needed to be stronger is getting stronger. It takes a lot more work to have a kid than it does to jerk off.
More whimmin are in college; but a LOT more men are in TRADE SCHOOLS (you know, training for those non-desk jockey jobs that keep “the equals’” convenient, technologically-manvanced societies RUNNING).
Furthurmore, while “the equals” get better average grades in school, males do better on STANDARDIZED tests (these are an OBJECTIVE measure of knowledge and reasoning skills; school grades leave room for SUBJECTIVITY from many angles).
The myopic lens that media and pop culture view men through, and subsequently portray them as, lead even stupider people to form opinions of them that are hardly representative of the FACT that the vast majority of men are law-abiding, productive members of society; yet who are nevertheless demonized because such is fashionable…necessary for “the equals” to feel better about their inferiority, in this politically correct climate (and it’s those “stupid” men who are still creating almost every gadget and gizmo you take for granted, discovering almost everything, winning almost every inventor or discoverer of the year type award, and maintaining and repairing ALL THOSE THINGS when they need it).
Hey – my neighbor Jeff, who’s a dwarf, can bench press, dead lift, curl, or squat more weight than than almost any woman – save for “World Class” level (whether she’s 5′1″, 5′5″, or 5′9″…it DOESN’T matter).
Besides, lifting the weight men do, day in and day out WITHOUT COMPLAINT (you “equals” should try that sometime), such as that tire that needs changing, the lawnmower that needs to be put in the trunk and taken for repair, or that box full of crap “she just had to have;” or things like pulling her out of a burning building (VERY few “equals” are equaaaaaly qualified for this position), all take a LOT more effort than her shrieking “But honeeeyy…I need youuu to dooo iiit!!!”
MyFantasiesAreMoreRealisticThanYours
You really are a stupid cunt.
Whilst trying not to take you comment as serious, “they are more women in college” but how many of them are actually studying REAL degrees such as Engineering, Economics, physical Sciences. My guess is NOT a lot.
English Lit, drama, management, american studies; are NOT real degrees.
Whilst it good for society for men and women to be equal, don’t raise the women at the expense of guys.
The battle of the sexes is the spice of life….
ONE REASON WOMAN ARE BETTER THEN MEN… WE ARE NOT YOU… WE NEVER CAN BE LIKE YOU.
So you’re saying women are better at being inferior?
@katie: Dumb shit bitch, masterson’s articles were good enough to draw your attention along with rest of the feminist pig whores.
@kayla: Glad you enjoyed the book and thought it was “fantastic”. You go, girl! And your opinion counts unlike the feminazis.
@explosive restraint: Your mom sold me the trailer, whore. It was actually meant for you, but she thought you were an undeserving lil bitch. Feminist cunts like you should be left alone anyways, no real man wants a relationship with a dumb feminist shit bitch.
This is the most biased website I have ever seen. It seems like you are just trying to be controversial and make a name by yourself by saying extremely offensive things. Yes, some of these ideas may hold some truth to them for SOME women, but it does not hold true for every woman. The same way I’m sure a lot of negative stereotypes hold true for men, but not all men.
For one, I am a 20 year old female. I have worked since I was 14. At age 18 I was given a management position at a high end retail store, where I am still employed, I also bartend on weekends to make extra money. I am a full time university student who maintains a high gpa. I pay for my own car insurance, car, school tuition and living expenses. I have never relied on any man to give me his money, I have always been self sufficient. All relationships I have ever had, I have been more than generous and paid for my share of costs or often more. Now I am going to assume that you will assume that I am overweight or homely in some way, which I am not. I take pride in my appearance as I am physically fit and maintain an attractive appearance.
You do not seem to be a stupid man so I believe that you are really just seeking attention. This attention seeking is very harmful and I hope you understand the consequences of your actions. I understand that there are women who are prostitutes and gold diggers. Keep in mind that most prostitutes are drug addicts who are under the control of a man who is taking advantage of their drug dependence and lack of resources. A gold digger is really just a more intelligent version of a prostitute. Either way the majority of women are not prostitutes and gold diggers, as the majority of men are not pimps and drug dealers. There are also a lot of intelligent women who are far more successful and beneficial to society than the idiots you are riling up on this website. You may not be directly spreading hate speech, but you are creating an idea in the heads of morons that they are superior and should treat women as such.
You say that I should not have the right to vote or to work? I deserve this right more than most people you know, probably even yourself. There are stupid women and stupid men. You fail to recognize that there are more idiots and losers amongst men than there are intelligent successful men. (Those idiots and losers probably make up the majority of your audience here which is why they agree with all of your reasoning, even when it is completely absurd). What you are doing on this website is wrong. I am a very hardworking, ambitious person who has a lot to contribute to society. By women contributing, as a society we can double our ability to develop our brightest minds. More doctors, more lawyers, more entrepreneurs. There are intelligent women out there who deserve to be respected in society. You are demeaning our ability to gain that respect. What you are doing here is creating a mindset for the sheep that will blindly follow. Who knows what negative repercussions you may have caused by promoting your notion of male supremacy! This is dangerous.
chrsty, you’re a rambling moron.
Sexist
If men are women ARE different then being sexist is a rational standpoint.
do you genuinely think that these reasons are valid?
there are just simply too many errors to point out… but I’ll give a shot at trying to argue with your massive over generalizations:
1. SOME men wear watches, SOME women wear watches
2. SOME marriage is due to the actions of women, but statistically MOST marriages breakdown due to the actions of the men: attitude, lack of effort, infidelity and abuse
3. SOME women are racists, but nearly 85% of the BNP is MEN
etc etc
You’re a fuckwit.
{{SOME marriage is due to the actions of women, but statistically MOST marriages breakdown due to the actions of the men: attitude, lack of effort, infidelity and abuse}}…………
PREACH THAT SHIT ELSEWHERE………………..
70-80% DIVORCES ARE INITIATED BY WIMMIN……..
MOST MAARIAGES FAIL TODAY BECOZ MODERN WIMMIN HAVE BECOME SELFISH,GREEDY,HAVE AN UNENDING LIST OF WANTS & DESIRES,UNCOMPROMISING,REBELLIOUS,SELF CENTERED,
NARCISSISTS & PRECISELY DOES NOT KNOW WHEN THE HELL
TO SHUT THE FUCK UP…………
MORE PRECISELY, THE LAWS OF THE LAND ALLOWS THE WIMMIN TO LOOK DIVORCE AS A PROFITABLE PROPOSITION..
THE LAWS GIVES THE INCENTIVE TO WIMMIN TO BECOME
A TOTAL SELF SERVING, SELF ENTITLED GREEDY BITCH & GET
AWAY WITH IT……………
WHICH WIMMIN IN HER RIGHT MIND WOULD REFUSE THEM WHEN THE LAWS OF THE LAND………THE UNHOLY STATE…….
THE BIG BROTHER PROMISES THE WIMMIN TO GET AWAY WITH THE LOOT???……………………….
Dude, how gay are you?
stupid whores