Truth in Manvertising
Myth: Men are blundering incompetent jackasses.
If you’re some kind of alien and you watch a lot of television (or even a little bit of television), you’ll be presented with one thing: men are lazy idiots who can’t get anything right the first time unless they’re gay — and the only way they get to have sex is with money.
The assumption there is also that you’re of an alien species that doesn’t have gender. If you did, you would already know that women, no matter what the species, are nature’s cruel joke on man.
Watch television for about five minutes and you’ll see at least one of the following:
A man getting hen pecked (most likely a fat man) for not doing a unisex job.
A man not knowing how to behave around his significant other.
A man fucking something up.
In all my life I have seen the last of those things maybe twice, and I have never ever fucking seen it while a man had a tool in his hands. Television and more specifically commercials, say otherwise.
You know why that is? That’s because women are validation craving harpies. They’re gluttons for having their asses kissed and every man in every marketing company on Earth knows it. Want to sell a woman a new car or a pink cell phone or some moisturizer for her face that 20/20 already fucking proved does absolutely nothing? The answer is simple: just tell her that men are jackasses. It has nothing to do with face moisturizing, but women are too bamboozled by having their egos stroked to notice.
That’s not the case with men because we don’t go in for that kind of slander. Men are only about one thing: being positive. That’s why our commercials — commercials for beer, cars, and erectile dysfunction; show people having a good time and not getting shit all over.
“I like having a good time and other people having a good time,” says a man watching the television. “Perhaps I should get some of this beer, car, or erectile dysfunction.”
Seriously, when’s the last time you saw a commercial for some woman product that wasn’t about how stupid men are? Tampon commercials don’t count because they’re gross. That answer is never.
Women car commercials? They’re about how women can dump men as easily as they can change their car — neither of which woman can do because they’re clingy and they don’t have good jobs.
Women exercise commercials? They don’t exist because women are lazy. Women exercising are commercials for men.
Next time you see a man acting like a jackass on TV (and you’re not watching the actual show Jackass), just remember that women need to metaphorically have their self-esteem blown if they’re going to buy anything — including into a relationship with you — and some man in marketing figured that out a million years ago.
Men being stupid on TV is a testament to our unending greatness.
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If you feel so secure, why are you making a big deal out of it? doesnt it prove that your insecure if you can’t let it go?
wow i think you won !!!!
wait, I hear bullshit coming
So let me get this straight….
Commericals and shows which depict men as idiots are actually written by men to stroke the egos of women so they will buy more of the useless crap that women buy.
Ok….
I think men shot themselves in the foot with that one then. First of all, the advertising sector contains more female employees than almost any other American corporate field (except teaching — but most don’t consider that corporate — and nursing which was always a bit female heavy). In the past 30 years, women have entered the field of television production and writing at an increase of almost 300% over what was common in the early 70’s.
It may have started out as a savvy ad campaign, but it’s rolled out of control and now the women actually believe the men are idiots who cannot function without a woman behind the scenes….and if the men *let* this ball roll out of bounds…then maybe the women are right.
It’s kinda like how when we men play with our kids we purposely lose to build characterm we’re reinforcing your own delusion just for a quick buck. Ofcourse women know nothing of the sort and would do anything to prove they are better than their own kids, hence why women tend to get skankier when their daughters hit the teens and after a pregnancy and while everyone is going nuts over the new baby, the woman feels left out and secretly loathes her own baby because of the ravaging her body took for 9 months. We call that Postpartum Depression
“Seriously, when’s the last time you saw a commercial for some woman product that wasn’t about how stupid men are? Tampon commercials don’t count because they’re gross. That answer is never..”
Sadly it seems some minion of the advertising world has either read this article or discovered the concept on their own. I won’t gross you out without details, but on Australian tv at least, the final bastion of poor taste in advertising has been crossed, and Dick’s original point is now without exception…
I love this guy, dick.and i dont mean this in some gay way.this is how i feel about females.some dumb female will come on and try to suck up to the men on here cause they know they are pissing us off to the point we dont want or need them.well,maby want them for a good blow job.but dont need them. now they have exspose their bullshit.they are finding out they are losing their bread and butter.that is the only thing they are smart at.they know they are losing their bread n butter.keep up the great work dick.keep those balls bouncing
I’m just going to partailly quote you. I refuse to pollute this site with any more of that trash…
Okay, 1st off, try typing in paragraphs, instead of jumbled messes of pointless bullshit.
2nd, Do you seriously think you’re the 1st woman, or beta male, to come by and say this EXACT same thing? Why don’t you read thru a thread or two before you go on, and say the exact same god damned thing every other 1st time visitor says? OH, i know why, because that would qualify as research, something I assume to be somehow morally dishonest to women.
and finally, shut the fuck up.
Aww, cute. Slut, you lie about us and make any little assumption that your inferior mind will transfer to your silly little mouth - or sillier fingernails, glistening with globs of whore paint, and act like you’re a fucking psychic when you say that you’re going to be beaten back down to your place. Consider this: A girl has never won an argument here. Ever. Period. Why do you keep trying? Do you have some type of disease… oh, wait. Sorry about your birth defect.
So sad. Unfortunately it seems all of you have been burned by some crazed bitch (or bitches) and now believe all women are that way. Like all stereotypes, this one is ridiculous, too. Hate to tell you, I don’t buy $40 facial moisturizer, I work 40 or more hours a week at a shitty job to help pay for my family’s expsenses, I drive a bad ass four wheel drive, I worked in public safety for 15 years, I don’t take shit off of anyone, and I am raising a beautiful 3 year old daughter to be respectful of ALL people–male, female, black, white, etc. Yes. I am a woman. I am not fat or ugly. No, I am not gay or butch. My husband is a firefighter–so he’s no puss. Yes. I can be a bitch. It’s obvious from most of these posts that all of you “guys” can be jackasses, too. Welcome to the real world. Anyone can be a jackass–that’s not a title reserved for one sex, one race, or one political party. It just really sucks that you poor bastards are so self-absorbed and narcissitic that you cannot see beyond your pain to realize LIFE is a bitch, she burns us all, and you can choose to sit around and whine each time it happens (which, by the way, a smart PERSON asks themselves at some point what is that THEY keep doing that keeps causing the same shit to happen to them–ie: if you keep getting fucked over, you’re a dumbass–male or female–because you keep letting it happen to you). A wise MAN once said, you cannot be used unless you let yourself be used.
Let the woman bashing begin…
this is one awseme article, the tv has no promotion for good men what so ever
I don’t know Diamatik I think the hands off approach works the best. Let them come to you…
Many of the most fanatical on this site grew up in neo-feminist houses, got burnt to a crisp by a female or 7, comes across this knowledge late in life and knows it’s a great cause that must never die…
That story brought tears to my eyes. It must really hurt you to see the young being so badly indoctrinated in the ways of women.
It is your manly duty to teach them, and teach them well. Keep in mind that when you do this you’re not only benefiting your family, but you’re also doing this for the benefit of mankind.
Aren’t men the ones with more disposable income? You’d think advertisers would cater to us too.
A good friend of mine just married a horrible bitch of a woman who treats him like shit all because he truly believes in his heart that relationships are supposed to be like the ones on television, with the women always nagging about something and the men just dealing with it or being idiots. The wedding was like a funeral. I feel like I’ve lost my friend to this beast. She can’t let him out alone and when she comes out with him she gets wasted and embarasses herself and us.
According to television, and all pop culture, it’s completely normal to be unhappy at the hands of some awful woman. I think its a bigger deal than this article implies. What about my little nephews? I cringe every time they let thier little girl friend pick the game or go first. She’s learned to be demanding and entitled, and they’re learning to accept it.
Awful, just awful.
And a last word to you too Dick :-)
Wound up? Men don’t get wound up.
Appreciated, Tyler.
-Dick
Dick, if you get wound up by a woman simply agreeing with you then you have problems.
Yes, we all agree it’s the art of the state. The only site on the planet telling women the truth.
Dick, you are a god among men…which puts you pretty fuckin high. This whole website is basically “state the obvious.” I love it.
I know I have it right. The last thing I need is validation from a woman. Fuck off my site.
-Dick
Dick has it right here. It only matters that a commercial makes money. That is its only agenda.
Countess, commercials are written to make money. If they don’t make money, people lose their jobs. There’s no room for agenda.
-Dick
That made me laugh out loud. Good job, as always, Dick.
-wolfe
Television scripts and commercials are mainly written by liberal gay men, who have a vested interest in destroying patriarchal ideas and institutions like male honor, chivalry, and the traditional family structure. If they can do that AND sell useless moisturizing crap to women so much the better.