Valentine’s Bullshit 2008

Valentine’s Day is the natural extension of a sickness that has befouled the female race since the beginning of time. That sickness is called gimmie-ism: an insatiable hunger for free shit no matter what the context. If a woman sees it, she wants it and she doesn’t care how she gets it.

That’s why men wear neckties. They’re a subtle, visual reminder of The Penis.

Women are like zombies with romantic knick-knacks and other sentimental trash. Zombie pigs. No matter what the reason for it is, if it reeks of love and it’s in front of her, a woman will consume it with a maximum of grunting and moaning. Enter Valentine’s Day; a day that appeals to anyone who appreciates a gift given out of obligation and resent.

No woman would be as happy with the same gifts given on February 15th. Whatever percentage of happiness is lost is the exact percentage of “cunt” that woman is.

Fuck the “spirit of giving”. A woman would appreciate a gift pried out of your cold, dead hands. A woman would appreciate a gift pried out of the cold, dead hands of the child who mined it and mounted it on a ring. A woman would feel special at a wedding even if she was pregnant.

Every time you see a woman at a bar without a drink, know that she’s got a rampant case of gimmie-ism. She’ll die of thirst if someone doesn’t pay the requisite 10.50 plus tip for a chance to brush against one of her tits.

Enjoy these man Valentine’s Day cards and remember that Valentine’s Day is on Wednesday February 14th.

Related Articles:

109 Responses to “Valentine’s Bullshit 2008”

Pages: [1] 2 3 4 5 6 » Show All

  1. Sandra Says:

    Does anyone like V-day? Such a waste of a good day.. Dick, you’d be surprised how many females (not even women who are merely single) don’t give a shit about the holiday.

  2. kitsura Says:

    You know the strange thing is, in Japan and Korea, on Valentine’s Day women give gifts to men not the other round.

  3. detached Says:

    You have got to play the situation to your advantage. Whenever in doubt, just think of Patton on the stage, in front of the flag and think to yourself, “would George do this?”.

  4. Lynn Says:

    Just had a sudden flashback….”When you stick you hand….in the pile of goo…..that used to be your buddy’s face…..” can’t remember the rest offhand.

  5. Lynn Says:

    Great quote, though.

  6. Ginger Says:

    If a guy gave me one of those cards, I would die a little inside due to lack of oxygen while laughing.

  7. Rose Says:

    These are fucking funny. I’m so printing the remember your first valentine one for my hubby! lol

  8. Sarah Says:

    I can’t even believe you are blaming valentines day on women. You need to do some research. valentines day is a load of consumer horseshit squeezed out by rich powerful men. The reason for it is to get women to confuse their needs with their wants and to get your money. Valentines day began as a day for giving hand written love notes and became what is today. Diamond companies and greeting card companies picked up the holiday because they saw an opportunity to take all kinds of regular peoples money. These companies chiefly founded by men to make money. Walt Disney also lent a hand by creating the princess complex. Another way to take your money. It is a good idea to make sure you know about a topic before you discuss it. Capitalism and the idea of a consumer based economy are the root causes of this phenomenon. If you don’t like it I suggest you move to Cuba Instead of scapegoating women. You think that women are to blame when in fact rich and powerful men have set this lifestyle into motion. But I suppose your naive belief that men are all working together will prevent you from pulling back the curtain to reveal the man behind it. And so you will forever be slaves. Perhaps your children will be blessed with the intellect to discover the truth.

  9. Sarah Says:

    Oh and by the way neck ties are a visual reminder that your employer has you by the throat.

    And gimmeism benefits rich corporations and business owners, not women.

    You really put the blinders on in an attempt to blame women but its not working. You may be able to get lonely mysogynist men to fund your career but intelligent people laugh at you.

  10. Bishop Says:

    Sarah said:

    And gimmeism benefits rich corporations and business owners, not women.

    Albeit corporations do make money, to say that women do not benefit from gifts given to them on Valentine’s day, is to be completely deluded. Plenty of women are downright mean if their boyfriends or husbands forget or don’t get them anything for Valentine’s day. I know firsthand, I went to the ER for stitches one Valentine’s day.

    Maybe women get ideas that they can abuse men from the consumer ads showing women beating up men in the event a gift is not given? Perhaps it’s the whole idea of Female superiority that is burned into the western woman’s mind? Either way, Valentine’s day boils down to one of the most misandric holidays ever. Yeah, let’s promote domestic violence against men if we don’t get our shit! Great holiday idea.

  11. Bishop Says:

    Sarah said:
    Diamond companies and greeting card companies picked up the holiday because they saw an opportunity to take all kinds of regular peoples money….

    …Capitalism and the idea of a consumer based economy are the root causes of this phenomenon. If you don’t like it I suggest you move to Cuba Instead of scapegoating women.

    I’ll grant you that companies like DeBeers and Hallmark are partially to blame for the epidemic of “gimmieism” (damned fine manly word there Dick), however if it weren’t for weak-minded materialistic women pretty much demanding gifts or else having to face at best a cold shoulder, or at worst a Valentines day in the ER then we wouldn’t even be discussing the misandry of Valentines day right now.

    Further, your view towards Capitalism is completely skewed. It’s a fact that any economic philosophy, when taken to extremes can be very damaging. You sound just like the Assemblywomen of of Athens around 400 B.C. Aristophanes had the women dress as men and vote themselves into power. Once in charge they instituted changes to make the government huge, and then converted Greece to socialism.

    History ought to be enough to show that women, when put in charge will always favor Communism, Marxism, or any other socialistic practice that despises a punishment/reward system; thereby making everyone “equal.” This is a feminist Utopian wet dream that has failed civilizations for centuries.

  12. BITCHKILLA Says:

    It is no secret that women always demand “equality” (read : equal rewards for those who put in less work). We can’t blame them for that. It’s as Dick says : you don’t blame a woman just like you don’t blame a dog.

    We, the men, need to wake up and put an end to all of this feminist nonsense. Any intelligent man realizes that we are the ones responsible for the current state of things, and only we can set things straight.

  13. T Says:

    I hate women, they are useless holes

  14. chelimar Says:

    T said:

    I hate women, they are useless holes

    yet, you use the holes provided to you, do you not?

  15. Enough Says:

    PLEASE READ

    All the stupidness on this site is enough ,but what caugh my attention is not Dick’s bullshit but the little line at the bottom of every page “Men Are Better Than Women, by Dick Masterson is proudly powered by WordPress and hosted at LTTech 1,642,966 Served. ”

    I can not believe ,company’s like that whom also powers big name like :Yahoo and CNN ,also powers this idiot .

    I will make it a personal business to let them know how about this website ,which calls to violence and hatered ,and everybody that feels like me should do the same .

  16. Danielle Says:

    Sandra said:

    Does anyone like V-day? Such a waste of a good day.. Dick, you’d be surprised how many females (not even women who are merely single) don’t give a shit about the holiday.

    Agreed, I couldn’t be bothered with the holiday. And I’m not single, either.

  17. Will Says:

    Interesting… However I slightly disagree even though you do have a point. You don’t quite hit the nail on the head with this article. Yes women are needy and greedy and all their wants are in fact their needs. However, to shed the real light on why Valentines Day is utter Bullshit you will have to examine what really is love within human nature.

    Humans technically and factually cannot ever “TRULY LOVE” each other.. Human affection and love with in intimate relationship is purely just conditional attraction. True love by definition is “UNCONDITIONAL”. Unconditional love is not possible in human relationships. In order to win a mates so called love you have to at least meet their lowest expectations, which are nothing more than conditions set forth for you to meet to win their so called affection..err..Cough..LOve. Example: Would you ever seriously see a incredibly hot woman ask a homeless drunk man who smells like rotten eggs and is down on his luck out on a date? Highly unlikely! Just like female penguins will pick the male penguin with the highest stack of pebbles to mate with to produce the best possible children that will be strong and ensure the species existence or survival. It’s purely primal and instinctual and has nothing to do with actual “LOVE”.. The core of love is purely conditional whether you choose to deny, ignore, or simply be in a constant state of ignorance of the facts of human nature. Once a mate or partner does not meet said expectations or does not sustain said expectations the relationship pretty much ends in either cheating for mutual breakup. This is why humans are judgmental. We all are. The best you can do is lower expectations(conditions), but you will never be rid of them. This is truly why valentines Day is utter bullshit. Women need for some reason, a reason to believe love is real when it truly isn’t.. If a mate dies are they crying because he died or because they will be alone and don’t know what they are to do without the needs and wants that this person has filled. Needs and wants and what this person offered them is the the loss that they cry over..Eventually easily replaced by another.. The closest you will ever come to true unconditional love is between a parent and a child..But those have their boundaries as well with in human nature.

    So for a woman to tell me she loves me is utter bull shit.. She doesn’t love me because I am simply Will.. She loves me because I have a car, a penis, meet her expectations on attractiveness, money, and intelligence. All which are simply conditionals.. Why didn’t she ask the retard out on a date instead, or the hunch back? Things that make you go HMMM!

  18. Dawn Says:

    Actually I partly agree with this….Valentines is a bullshit holiday….but what about it’s counterpart holiday- Steak and BJ day? lol

  19. INternet Says:

    AGREED.

    Hit the nail on the head there.

  20. Muzalon Says:

    Will said:

    Interesting… However I slightly disagree even though you do have a point. You don’t quite hit the nail on the head with this article. Yes women are needy and greedy and all their wants are in fact their needs. However, to shed the real light on why Valentines Day is utter Bullshit you will have to examine what really is love within human nature.

    Humans technically and factually cannot ever “TRULY LOVE” each other.. Human affection and love with in intimate relationship is purely just conditional attraction. True love by definition is “UNCONDITIONAL”. Unconditional love is not possible in human relationships. In order to win a mates so called love you have to at least meet their lowest expectations, which are nothing more than conditions set forth for you to meet to win their so called affection..err..Cough..LOve. Example: Would you ever seriously see a incredibly hot woman ask a homeless drunk man who smells like rotten eggs and is down on his luck out on a date? Highly unlikely! Just like female penguins will pick the male penguin with the highest stack of pebbles to mate with to produce the best possible children that will be strong and ensure the species existence or survival. It’s purely primal and instinctual and has nothing to do with actual “LOVE”.. The core of love is purely conditional whether you choose to deny, ignore, or simply be in a constant state of ignorance of the facts of human nature. Once a mate or partner does not meet said expectations or does not sustain said expectations the relationship pretty much ends in either cheating for mutual breakup. This is why humans are judgmental. We all are. The best you can do is lower expectations(conditions), but you will never be rid of them. This is truly why valentines Day is utter bullshit. Women need for some reason, a reason to believe love is real when it truly isn’t.. If a mate dies are they crying because he died or because they will be alone and don’t know what they are to do without the needs and wants that this person has filled. Needs and wants and what this person offered them is the the loss that they cry over..Eventually easily replaced by another.. The closest you will ever come to true unconditional love is between a parent and a child..But those have their boundaries as well with in human nature.

    So for a woman to tell me she loves me is utter bull shit.. She doesn’t love me because I am simply Will.. She loves me because I have a car, a penis, meet her expectations on attractiveness, money, and intelligence. All which are simply conditionals.. Why didn’t she ask the retard out on a date instead, or the hunch back? Things that make you go HMMM!

    If it’s all about ‘love’, how come young girls fall in love with old film-directors, never old bums? - Jackie Mason

Pages: [1] 2 3 4 5 6 » Show All

Leave a Reply


Close
E-mail It
Powered by ShareThis