Voluntary Incompetence
Click below to get Dick in your Ear and listen to the podcast of this article.
Volunteer charity work is for suckers and chumps and every woman who does it is both and then some.
Men who volunteer are geniuses. Volunteering is so much work, there’s barely any competition for all the retarded girls they’re about to nail. A dog shelter is my idea of heaven. Tons of hot and easy women lubing up their emotional sexacoasters by fucking around with abandoned puppies all day, and then putting those same cretins to death left and right because billionaires would rather have another yacht to sail around their private islands on than save a bunch of homeless shit-rats.
Fuck that’s manly.
Everyone knows, a woman’s intellect occurs in an inverse relationship to her bust size.
The stupider they are, the bigger they bounce.
Bill Gates has donated over a third of his lifetime earnings to charity.
A girl I slept with in college — before I dropped out and dropped into Man School — once worked every third weekend a month at soup kitchen until the death of her grandmother made her “forget” to do it anymore.
Men are better than women.
Warren Buffet donate 30 billion dollars to the Gates Foundation because he lost a bet.
In grammar school, one of my she-teachers suggested the class think about the less fortunate during the upcoming Christmas season. The thought might count when it means giving your parents a shitty Christmas card made of glitter, noodles, and construction paper, but thoughts aren’t going to keep any bums warm. Not even thoughts of Nicolas Cage nailing Heidi Klum.
Men are better than women.
When men donate to charity, we give fully and appropriately of our man-selves. Men, for instance, will start an organization like the Red Cross or Holy Shirts. Organizations that get the fucking job done in a charitable fashion. Howard Stern has given away dozens of free boob jobs. That’s a charity anyone can get behind — or should I say in front of?
Women, being cheap as shit, give absolutely nothing to charity. On average, women volunteer nearly 30% more than men, but 30% of nothing is fucking nothing. Go to a bank and open up a money market account with all the shit in your pocket. What you have in five years is what women have now.
If you don’t think a woman’s time is worthless, imagine this. If you had a woman to command for an hour, what would you have her do? Exactly. You can’t put a value on that. Either it’s priceless or it’s called prostitution and that’s illegal. Either way, women aren’t worth a damn.
Here’s something else that’s of no worth: puppies and kittens. One homeless man dies every year because a bunch of crazy broads teamed up to take care of some dumb fuck shelter puppies instead of throwing some peanut butter and jelly sandwiches at a vagrant.
Women are all sick and dangerous. Not in the way a man can be dangerous like Son of Sam or Charles Chaplin, but dangerous in a way a fork is when it gets caught in the garbage disposal. Even if you’re smart enough to not reach for it instinctively, you might still cut your tongue on it a week later while eating some tater tots.
Men are better than women.
Related Articles:
Pages: « 5 4 3 2 [1] Show All
Women are indeed real people.
Abortions are tragic. Women exist to have babies, they aren’t real people. They should have babies. Not abortions.
Women won’t have sex with me. I just want sex. Why won’t women have sex with me. Please have sex with me so I can stop hating you.
AMEN!
Then how about you continue to go fuck yourself, but do it somewhere else.
Wow, so many men who think women are lousy at sex. Well, perhaps you’re not giving us anything worth thinking about? Hell, if five seconds of olympic-style action is all you can offer me, why waste the mental energy?
And I didn’t say my mind-blowing orgasms were the result of a man, either. At least not at man I’d find here!
Heehee, she admits she doesn’t use her brain when she fucks and then writes about her mind-blowing orgasms. You need a mind to blow it, dearie!
Sex is all in the brain. 100%.
Most women have no brain, therefore, they are lousy at sex.
I’ve heard men complain that their wives won’t let them go down on them. That’s like refusing a free pint!
Silly Y-defs.
The remark about women not using their brains during sex is priceless.
I know that Dick’s written about how women are lousy in bed, but really Dick, if you wanted, there’s a whole article somewhere about why they’re so bad. And it boils down to assuming that they’ll be awesome if they just lay there.
They don’t, in fact, actually engage their brains the way men do during sex.
For men, great sex is like an Olympic event, requiring precision timing and active participation of both the mind and body.
For women, it’s just laying there.
Crash and buuuuuuurrrrn.
Dick, I have to deduct 50 man points for laughing at your own joke (About breasts and being the front of). I found it funny too.
Another great article though.
You don’t use your brain while fucking? Perhaps that’s why women are so lousy at sex.
-Dick
Hahahahahahahahahahahahahahhahahahahahahhahahahah looks like dick made a funny
You don’t use your brain while fucking? Perhaps that’s why women are so lousy at sex.
-Dick
Be grateful that God gave you even one purpose. If you lacked it, you would have been tied to a stake and burned a long time ago.
Enjoy your pencil-arms and bloated chest,
Doubtfish
P.S.
Everyone around you either is interchangable or wants to fuck you. Have a kawaii lyfe!
Wow, I’m not worth a damn? Then why would you want to command me for an hour? And the only thing you’d do is fuck me? Why not do something that requires the use of your brain?
Oh, look, I made a funny!