What Do the Superbowl, Boxing, and Wrestling Have in Common?
Men do everything one of two ways. We either do things as hard and as fast as possible, like a Corvette with Jimmy Page airbrushed onto the hood — awesome; or we do them not at all.
That’s why men are better than women at wearing jewelry. We don’t pussyfoot around things like a bunch of ladies.
Men wear jewelry in the same way we celebrate sons who are superb athletes or the way we have midlife crises. When it’s happening, everyone knows it and everyone better fucking recognize it as a big deal. The World Wrestling Federation championship title belt weighs over 6 pounds. Deal with it.
What comes to mind when you think of a ring? Probably some chinsy little strip of gold with a diamond and a 150-pound anchor attached to it sinking you into a pit of hell. The anchor is a metaphor for the woman wearing it. Marriage is the pit of hell — except marriage is the kind of hell that kicks you out when you can’t afford it anymore. I guess in that way, marriage is nothing like hell. Marriage is more like a prostitute and Yakov Smirnoff mixed together. In marriage, prostitute fucks you!
What comes to mind when you think of a Man Ring? Nothing but the ultimate in class and refinement times two. That’s men for you.
Women are so much worse than men they can take something stunning and rare and awesome like gold and rubies and ruin them with their cheapness and consumerism. Jewelry is ostentatious wealth. That’s why you don’t see men drooling over engagement rings at the mall come February 1st. Men, by nature, are not attracted to ostentation.
Don’t believe me? Marriage rates for people under 25 are plummeting and as of 2007, every woman under 25 is an obnoxious, self-righteous whore whose laughter resembles the she-braying of a fem-donkey. Do I need to draw a fucking pie-chart for you?
No. Pie charts are womanly and were invented by a woman so I would never do that. As far as I’m concerned, any scientific data that can’t be surmised in a sports analogy can go fuck itself. Let me give an example of a properly scientific ass-whooping:
Fact:
By the age of 50, 80 percent of women will have acquired a sexually transmitted disease known as HPV at least once.
Manslation
If you’re a woman, you’ve got a better chance of getting an STD in your life than Wayne Rooney has of getting hit by a fucking VW during the World Cup.
What Do the Superbowl, Boxing, and Wrestling Have in Common? Enormous men with bad fucking attitudes and rings worth more than your ass. That’s some man jewelry.
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January 9th, 2007 at 9:21 pm - IP Man-Hash: 59fc834bea7fe
Hey everyone - I’ve been lurking for a little bit, and I want to start adding my two cents.
Anyways, speaking of rings: Personally, I don’t intend to ever get married, except maybe when I’m very old (I’m 30 now) and I see something I like in the mail-order bride catalogue. But for you men who are unfortunate enough to have the expectation of a wedding band thrust upon you, here is as good an excuse as any to leave that shit it at home.
January 9th, 2007 at 11:18 pm - IP Man-Hash: 2e122cd32bd33
soren, there’s nothing that makes my man heart warmer than lurkers joining in on the manversation.
Great info. I’ll be using it shortly.
-Dick
January 11th, 2007 at 9:06 am - IP Man-Hash: 1af7e74d8fa44
I just want a progeny. Fuck marriage. Even getting gutted in child support is still cheaper to my wallet and sanity.
January 11th, 2007 at 10:00 am - IP Man-Hash: 1af7e74d8fa44
Dick,
How about a post?
Women suck at giving compliments.
They do, unless they are old ladies. I’m not talking about the empty bullshit they spew at the friends they hate either. Long live MABTW.
January 11th, 2007 at 12:37 pm - IP Man-Hash: 980cc8a8ac1a7
Actually, women are suckiest at discretion. All of them. Want to know for a fact something will get out? Let a woman in the loop. The most intimate of personal trivia, your deepest, most hallowed sentiments, secrets vital to national security or the preservation of the free world, humanity, etc.; none of this shit matters squat. They’ll just run blabbering their lips loose.
Dick’s really on top of this one.
- Santos - Camels - [overlay Henry Blight Halicki's original '74 classic] Gone in 60s
January 11th, 2007 at 1:41 pm - IP Man-Hash: 0264d76590fb0
Yeah, you need to do an article on the Duke Rape Hoax. Women suck at lying too.
January 12th, 2007 at 11:13 am - IP Man-Hash: 9ed3cdb80702a
dick,
its not called the World Wrestling Federation (WWF) anymore its now World Wrestling Entertainment (WWE) you got to get the “F” out.
January 12th, 2007 at 1:02 pm - IP Man-Hash: 6897e3ddf8ad0
CPL, while I appreciate the correction, I’m afraid I just can’t do that.
-Dick
January 12th, 2007 at 11:17 pm - IP Man-Hash: 9ed3cdb80702a
i meant get the lettter f out but im sure you knew what i meant
January 20th, 2007 at 9:58 pm - IP Man-Hash: 1f3d62b3f86dd
But…it’s women deciding don’t-cha-know…
Like they have a choice ?
January 20th, 2007 at 10:52 pm - IP Man-Hash: c7a298151bcdd
Then I guess men are the better liars, shit for brains?
Did you ever make it past the second brain, retarded wonder? God, you are one STUPID idiot, boy. LOL This is way too easy…………
No wonder you envy women. I bet you still live in your daddy’s basement. He doesn’t happen to enjoy dressing up in a clown’s outfit, does he? I’d report any strange smells coming from the cellar to the proper authorities, prick. LOL
January 20th, 2007 at 10:53 pm - IP Man-Hash: c7a298151bcdd
grade…….
you assholes should have an edit button. A real site would have one.
January 20th, 2007 at 10:55 pm - IP Man-Hash: c7a298151bcdd
Children have to eat, garbage. Gutted ? ooooo, 100 per month too much for a kid, you selfish piece of shit?
January 20th, 2007 at 10:56 pm - IP Man-Hash: c7a298151bcdd
A 11 year old girl you buy and rape isn’t a marriage, loser. LOL
January 21st, 2007 at 12:32 am - IP Man-Hash: 819b52dfd1c0c
You’ve spent hours typing to yourself.
Way to go idiot bitch.
January 21st, 2007 at 2:37 am - IP Man-Hash: 5fdb78f644952
This site has one. Only men are allowed access to it.
-wolfe
This post edited by wolfe (1) time(s).
March 15th, 2007 at 6:30 am - IP Man-Hash: 86f79bd2f8407
1. I’ve learned more valuable vocabulary from other men on this website than I did from all my woman teachers from kindergarten through grade 12.
2. Wolfe that was Nicely done. Now how the hell did you do it? Not that I truly need to know, any real man reads what he has written before submitting it to the general public (clearly unlike 99.99% of women) and is also able to admit any type of mistake he may have overlooked after he submits it and proceeds to read it again.
March 15th, 2007 at 6:40 am - IP Man-Hash: 980cc8a8ac1a7
The second button above the text form, titled ‘em’ (emboss?), and some creative writing.
December 1st, 2007 at 8:45 pm - IP Man-Hash: e24370fe2bb3c
Well, wrestling is fake
And why was this posy even necessary?
all you did was say you wear jewelry better than woman
January 27th, 2008 at 6:51 am - IP Man-Hash: 8f0a725ff54ee
yea and they probably get it from men. I dont know any women with stds but i know men.
April 8th, 2008 at 12:03 pm - IP Man-Hash: ab4545e236036
What kind of loser “LoLs” themselves after a weak feeble attempt at a slam? Ohhh yeah thats right.
April 8th, 2008 at 12:05 pm - IP Man-Hash: ab4545e236036
So go make yourself one? I mean ask the Mr If he can build you one after you get done on the Tits and Vagine’ forumns , or whatever else you waste your time on.
April 14th, 2008 at 6:11 am - IP Man-Hash: 09b607c8c4b90
She does that from time to time. Apparently she thinks she’s witty.
May 21st, 2008 at 7:24 am - IP Man-Hash: 98fa1d3e05323
old ladie compliments make my day
:)
young girl compliments make me scared and a little bit sick
:(
because being a man i know i dont have enough money or popularity to give them what they really want
June 16th, 2008 at 7:40 pm - IP Man-Hash: b3df7c3d4992a
lol, gtfo inferior bitch
June 16th, 2008 at 7:42 pm - IP Man-Hash: b3df7c3d4992a
women were the creators of AIDs Common fact