Whore Sells House
A single mother in Florida by the name of Deven Traboscia is selling her house and herself on eBay for the low, low price of $840,000.
Did I say low price? I meant outrageous price!
In her own words, prospective buyers are paying $340,000 for her two-thousand square foot home, and $500,000 for her unknown square foot vagina — which she’s already used to pop out two kids. Doesn’t sound like a great deal to me.
I’m no state-licensed vagina appraiser, but at 42 years old, and after having served two active tours of duty as a human cloner, that pussy is going for about a million dollars a square foot. The warranty on that thing has expired. The elastic band on thrift store underpants are tighter than that turkey gobbler. The girl’s junk would make a better shammy than a sex toy.
$500,000? In the immortal words of Gerrit Graham, “That’s too fuckin high!”
I’m not here to debate this to degrees of whoredom. All women are whores. Deven Traboscia is no different.
If a woman gets money because some guy thought he was going to get laid, she’s not a “clever lady businessman”, or “empowered”, she’s just a high priced prostitute. Think about it like this: if a cop takes money from criminals who think the law will treat them leniently because of it, that cop is a criminal. He’s not empowered. And if he decides to throw the book at them anyway, he’s just an asshole as well. Either way, he’s still a fucking criminal.
All women are whores.
What I am here to debate is price. In today’s market, the only real estate going for a million dollars a square foot is located in the center of Vatican City. In today’s vagina market, some old broad’s junk going for that same price per cubic foot is just as absurd. The three most important things to keep in mind when buying real estate are location, location, location. The three most important things to keep in mind when it comes to buying vagina are: age, age, age. If she’s over 23, don’t spend a dime. If she’s under 23, take her to TGI Friday’s.
Girls under 23 don’t know the difference between fine cuisine and fried shit.
For every decade a girl ages after 23, her value drops by 100%. That means that at 42, Deven Traboscia has priced herself $500,000 more than her market value. And don’t even talk to me about condition because from I can tell she’s as used as they come. Let’s look at the facts. She couldn’t keep at least one man happy (if the father of her children happens to be one man. It could be two!), and she failed at internet dating. Internet dating is the female equivalent of fishing with dynamite. Men on those sites are so desperate, they’ll pay just for the prospect of paying for sex. If a whore can’t find a steady customer to take care of her two-thousand foot mortgage payments there, then something is wrong with her.
And something always is. The only women on internet dating sites are delusional pseudo-career types who forever sit on the fence of feminism. They’re too useless to commit to their jobs and earn self-reliance, and they’re too arrogant to submit to a man and earn happiness. Quote the shit out of that last sentence because is the very nature of women.
You can call it chivalry, you can call it romance, you can call it “true love”, but what it really is is the exchange of money for sex. Period.
Without whores, men would never get laid. No man alive is immune to it. If you think you are, try getting laid by doing absolutely nothing. Be a nobody, spend no money, and don’t do anything to show you “care”. As a man, your time and your labor are money. You trade them for money from 9 to 5, and when you trade them to impress some dozy bitch, you’re paying for that pussy with something called Opportunity Cost. While you were listening to how much she “wants to be a veteraniarian” or how much she “wishes her stuffed animals could talk to her”, you could have been curing cancer or becoming a rock star. You gave that up to get laid.
And nothing is wrong with any of that! Unless the money being exchanged is $500,000 more than it should be! There’s nothing wrong with prostitution, but there is something wrong with overpaying.
If you read Deven’s justification for this promotional sham, you’ll find that she intends to hold out for “true love”. In woman terms, that means she reserves the right to put out until a yet to be determined sum is negotiated — and then paid. In man terms, she’s a fucking cocktease. Buyer beware!
That “spark” women are always complaining about is the actuation of a woman’s sex drive as a function of how much money and time she thinks she can get out of you and still stay within her personal comfort level of fraudulent behavior. In business, we call that market research. “Chemistry” is nothing more than subconscious market research done by the most devious salesmen the world has ever known: women.
Who else but a woman could sell dry roast beef years past it’s prime for $500,000 and still keep a straight face?
If any of you are thinking of bidding on Deven’s vagina (and house), I have this advice. Wait a few years and hit her fourteen daughter up for some of that “true love”. The apple never falls far from the tree; especially when that apple sees her father two days a week.
All women are whores and they all hate sex. You don’t have to like your job to get it done. The only miners I ever saw whistle while they worked were cartoons.
UPDATE 6/28:
The Sun Sentinel has changed Deven’s picture to one that makes her look less wrinkled. Here is the original.
UPDATE 6/29:
Please disregard my earlier advice to wait for Deven’s daughter to become available. It was just brought to my attention that she looks like a bargain bin transsexual.
Whore Sells House
The Original Craigslist Ad
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I bet Devon is so proud of her daughter! She has blossomed into a modern day prostitute…
@WOMEN (WHORES) . . .
STOP TALKING TO MEN LIKE YOU WILL DECIDE WHO AND WHEN WE FUCK. And STOP listing off your bullshit conditions because we don’t give a SHIT what YOU require to spread your legs for.
It’s not up to YOU if a guy gets laid tonight.
ITS UP TO —->> HIM.
Men are better - and have more tact - than women.
@STUDIOLINE
Huge smile on my face. :)
You’re overlooking what she (Anita) said.
“If any one needs a fuck or blowjob, I’m cheap.
AND –>> IF I REALLY LIKE YOU . . . IT’S FREE.”
She’s a whore by her own admission.
But at least she claims she’s a ‘cheap’ one.
Women ALWAYS say:
• “IF I really like you . . . . ”
• “IF I think you’re a nice guy . . . .”
• “IF you guys would just ___(insert PRICE FOR SEX here)___,
then MAYBE girls would ___(fill in the blank)___”.
Condition + Payment = WHORE.
Hilarious.
I love it when manholes pretend as if ‘REALLY LIKING A GUY’ is what makes her want to fuck him ‘for free’. That’s classic BAD female programming right there. And Studioline FELL FOR IT! Shame on you ;)
This is the classic example of woman dangling sex over a guy’s head so that she can get her (cheap?) PRICE FOR SEX met. And then to top it off , she will now openly LIE TO YOU and tell you that if you are ‘NICE’ to her - and she ‘REALLY LIKES’ you - you will get sex for free.
Gimme a fucking break.
If I waited around for a girl I “REALLY LIKED” —>> I WOULD NEVER GET LAID.
And women don’t fuck men they “REALLY LIKE” either. In fact, too many women DON’T FUCK men who are good to them. Women fuck - and even MARRY - men they HATE so they can have a fur coat and spend summers in the Hamptons.
She’s not saying anything new, or special, or different. She’s just saying what EVERY woman says over and over and over and over again since the beginning of time. “I’M A FUCKING WHORE. CUM AND GET IT”.
•••
When I hear a woman say “I love sex and don’t want ANYTHING but pleasure for you and/or me. You don’t even have to talk to me again.” . . . then MAYBE I will BEGIN to consider that “NOT ALL” women are whores.
But women don’t ever see the joy - or point - in that.
As if sex is not worth having –>> unless there is some Condition + Payment attached.
WHORES.
Menarebetterthanwomen.
Well, it’s a free market. She can sell herself for as much as she wants. I’m also available for that amount by the way.
So for 8 years she couldn’t give it away free and now
expects to get $500k? Is that Womath or something?
What’s the odds that it was a house she got from a divorce
and without the man that bought it she can’t afford to stay there.
And this is a woman who knows what she is talking about and other women should pay her to learn from her.
as an other women i say, she is crazy. does she really think a men will pay that much to fuck her. men go to bars lots of times and pick women to fuck.
she should ask her daughter she knows bars like that.
if any wanne needs a fuck or blowjob, hoerslaaf@hotmail.com
i’m cheap and if i really like you, it is free
anita
I’d rather hunt a god damn bigfoot than deal with that baggage!
This ‘ol beef-jerky looking broad is ALL washed up. Epic fail at 42 yrs old. “ohh .. tee-hee, I think I’ll run an ad on some public auction site to gain attention.. someone somewhere will buy into my scheme” - bitch say buh! Ain’t no guy in his right mind busting out his beaver-stretcher on this shit.
Her husband prolly bailed on her “non-working, but give me the world” ass (a.k.a. high maintenance) … then she took him for everything cuz she is fuckin’ lazy, and now can’t afford to keep the house, but she loves it cuz she came from the poor side of town and screwed her way to where she is…. now, desperate and lonely, she needs to do something that will once again, put attention in her favor in a grand attempt at finding some wick that will pay her way through life.
This makes me ill. What will they think up next? I shudder to even think.
The public response to Deven seems to be similar to that posted here:
http://ringmann32.newsvine.com/_news/2008/06/30/1626356-single-mom-sel ling-fla-home-heart-online#comments
I always had a feeling that kimora chick was a coniving slut of a prostitute in heels.
Not to mention vipers.
Why don’t you buy it then, cos we men are not interested.
Commander- I think most women like sex in the act. However, I think its that part of the female brain (I think its called the amaglydia (sp?)) that causes the hesitation/control issue about sex. Perhaps you will consider writing an essay on this issue.
According to the latest scientific research on female reproductive biology, 70% of all women suffer from a combination of sexual aversion disorder and anorgasmia… in light of the foregoing, is it any wonder that the overwhelming majority of women hate sex? The only pleasure any woman derives from having sex is the pleasure of receiving money and resources in exchange for spreading her legs.
Women are takers and receivers, not givers.
I think she is too cheap the price should be much higher. You cannot buy a decent house for that price.
http://stuffgirlslike.wordpress.com
Actually, she doesn’t look bad to me, but I am 66 years old. However, I have had my fill of AW, and am sure she is a fiend.
If Claudio puts his meat in the wringer, he deserves all the STD’s he gets.
Did you notice they only showed the adult daughter? The other one is 14, much smarter, and says she is embarrassed by her mom’s actions. Maybe there is hope for the young one, however never hang around daughters of divorced women.
Actually, I like this. In spite of dearie attempts to belittle the marriage strike, and make it look like it’s women who are turning off on marriage, publicity like this rubs their noses in their own poop.
Wrong.
Hip hop degenerates and wiggers are the biggest pussy whipped, whore coddling faggots ever given wealth to spread their repugnant matriarichal scum culture through audio waves.
He’s probably kissing the whores ass still and asking her how he can make her life of extorting him and fucking other men better for her and “her” children.
Every single matriarichal momma worshipping thug is a coward and sociopath to the core and should be subjected to the brutalist torture possible. The survival of our kind makes this requisite.
Tool - Ticks & Leeches
There’s nothing in the piece that says how she got the house. I have a pretty good idea: “Thank you, your honor.”
Evidently, the black skirt failed to minimize the size of her ass. Claudio will turn around and run for the return flight home once he follows her for 10 seconds to baggage claim.
But then again, with the exchange rate the way it is between america and europe, Claudio is getting a substantial discount, and so he may ignore that ass for the price. There will be a treadmill waiting for her in Italy.
I like the way, the woman anchor has this cute little saccarine smile after the tape is done rolling. More insult to injury.