Why women hate sex.

Out of all the problems that have ever or will ever exist on the Earth, there is only one that men haven’t and will never be able to solve — not because they can’t, because that’s ridiculous, but because the problem is unsolvable by design. Women hate sex.

That’s it, there you have it. The end-all, be-all of cluster fucks. But why?

Do women hate sex — and they do — because of some kind of woman-guilt from an outdated puritan societal dogma? Or perhaps a stigma of guilt or a fear of abandonment? No. None of these things are it. Women hate sex simply because they are lousy at it.

This can be proved in a quick stroll down the checkout aisle at your local market of groceries — a place thick to the rafters with women. Take a look at some of their magazines and you will no doubt see a running theme: ‘Ten Ways to not suck in bed’, ‘Six Things to do to Your Man that aren’t Lay There Like a Futon’, and ‘Honestly who gives half a fuck about socks being on or off? Jesus Christ that’s pathetic’.

Also, much in the same way that a wall probably doesn’t like or doesn’t care about playing tennis with you, it’s definitely not your fault. Don’t let your sympathetic male compassion get the better of you. You could be dancing around like a maniac and pulling stunts out of your figurative ass like Johnny Magic the Wicked Awesome — maybe some whirl-arounds and in your face spikes from across the court — it’s really up to you as the man — but no matter what, the wall will remain unfazed. It just sits there doing nothing like a lump on a log probably thinking that it wants a new expensive coat of paint.

This same theory can be applied to many other things as well. For example: that women hate problems.

In Chinese, the symbol for crisis is the same as opportunity. I haven’t looked that up, but I heard it from a man so it’s probably true because us men have something called integrity. This means that in a time of crisis, we men are at our show stopping best. Take a flat tire on a moonless night for instance. While a man is out changing nuts and bolts and doing all manner of screwing on the side of the road, will a woman so much as think to grab a flashlight and help? No.

That’s because women hate holding flashlights, because they are complete rubbish at it. Force a woman to hold a flashlight when it matters and you’re likely to catch her aiming it into the sky for absolutely no goddamn reason. You’re better off just duct taping it to a mailbox and catapulting it into space.

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4542 Responses to “Why women hate sex.”

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  1. doubt Says:

    manhole said:

    [TL;DR]

    What a fucking asshole.

  2. Erick Says:

    Her name is agent of desire? Like dick said, all women are whores.

  3. Tom Says:

    Are you an Idiot? If you’re going to play that game, Without men there wouldn’t be babies either. But then again - Without met there wouldn’t be Electricity, A law System, Light, Long distance communication, Buildings, farming and so many other things.

    Why don’t you go ahead and name something a woman has ever invented that had the slightest bit of importance in this world?

    aputi said:

    Without women, there would be no more men. They’re the ones that make the babies. :) Unless, can you get pregnant, Dick?

  4. agentofdesire Says:

    agentofdesire said:

    L said:

    agentofdesire said:

    CS what on earth makes you think you have the power to tell me what to do?

    Probably the fact that he’s a man, and you’re a woman.
    Which begs the question, why aren’t you doing as he says? Ah well.

    Thank f*** for the disintegration of forced marriage. The only way Commander Scott could ever have had a woman is through forced marriage…but thank f*** for womankind that no woman is forced to sleep anywhere near him….and no laws are left that give license to this freaky self-appointed entitlement that men like CS think they have, to order women about.

    I know you fantasise about being a rapist CS, but the fact that you believe this about yourself, while you don’t actually have the courage to go beyond your front door (because the human race is a bit too unpredictable for you to manage without suffering a major panic attack), makes it clear that you need a more comprehensive care package from social services, than the one you are already getting.

    I have to break the news to you… all those rapes you think you’ve commited - well, they were all figments of your imagination - while you compulsively tugged away on your friction-sore member.

    Seriously CS. Talk to your social worker. They may be able to help you.

  5. agentofdesire Says:

    son of the suns said:

    Hahah… when did I display racism? In your oestrogen fueled imagination?

    Ahem…here:

    Watch the traitor use his former slave masters own propaganda as evidence of his genetic superiority.

    Being black does not mean you are the descendant of a slave. Being so direct in stating that you think it to be the case is prejudiced, and your comment was designed to offend and shame on the basis of this atrocious power-imbalance.

  6. Elizabeth Says:

    Dick,

    If you’ve forgotten, it is because of a WOMAN you are even on this planet. So, shut the fuck up you ungrateful cunt.

    Why are you such an extremist anyway? You’re calling all women whores yet you’ve created this site and wrote your book because you yourself, are an ATTENTION WHORE.

    Your mother clearly didn’t show you enough love when you were little. It’s a shame she didn’t have an abortion.

  7. BB Says:

    Anamika said:

    Despite my better judgment, I have to say this because it popped into my mind when you said: “Women hate sex simply because they are lousy at it.”

    Why aren’t you gay?

    I don’t mean this is a rude way. But seriously. If women are such failures and so horrible to be around and put up with, why do you have sex with them? Why not just have sex with other men? You don’t seem to want children and I have heard you say that the only reason to have women around to have babies, even though they make terrible mothers.

    According to your views, men are the only ones who have it all figured out. It’s just the logical conclusion I drew from your rant.

    Then again, I am a woman.

    because gay guys are a bunch of feminine bitches. being gay doesn’t solve the problem, use your fucking head.

  8. Lucinda Says:

    Wow. You, my friend, are an assclown. From a logical standpoint, your argument makes no sense whatsoever (your conclusion doesn’t follow from your premise, which, fyi, is WRONG). Also, judging from the content of your other “works,” you’ve clearly got your head shoved so far up your ass that you can’t see straight. Just thought you should know.

    Have a great life alone! I’m glad you’re mom had the foresight to name you Dick, but I wish she had done us all a favor and just left your ass outside for the elements.

    Actually, I should thank you for the laugh. I didn’t know absolute idiots like yourself and some of these others still existed! I’m so glad that there’s still useless people around–we can use you guys for fodder and such while the smarts ones make the world better.

    Farewell!
    ~Lucinda~

  9. Real Men of Genius Says:

    Lucinda said:

    Wow. You, my friend, are an assclown. From a logical standpoint, your argument makes no sense whatsoever (your conclusion doesn’t follow from your premise, which, fyi, is WRONG). Also, judging from the content of your other “works,” you’ve clearly got your head shoved so far up your ass that you can’t see straight. Just thought you should know.

    Have a great life alone! I’m glad you’re mom had the foresight to name you Dick, but I wish she had done us all a favor and just left your ass outside for the elements.

    Actually, I should thank you for the laugh. I didn’t know absolute idiots like yourself and some of these others still existed! I’m so glad that there’s still useless people around–we can use you guys for fodder and such while the smarts ones make the world better.

    Farewell!
    ~Lucinda~

    Another one who is Right ON!

  10. Commander Scott Says:

    Erick said:

    Her name is agentofdesire? Like dick said, all women are whores.

    frigidagentofcastration:

    Having obviously been brought up in an environment of Protestant Anglo-Saxon privilege, you have very little comprehension of the subtleties of human social behaviour; just like every single other Canadian, American, and British woman on the surface of the planet, you are obviously innocent, gullible and naïve, unable to take care of yourself unless being financially supported by that spineless castrato you call a husband or the supposedly “chivalrous” paternalism of the federal government. Accustomed to a life of petit-bourgeois luxury, you would never survive for any longer than a few minutes in the Third World. With your idealized vision of human socio-economic organization, you would doubtless end up being savagely thrashed to death by a restless native populace. Despite the radical social constructionism and Boasian cultural anthropology preached by your Women’s Studies professors at that overpriced daycare centre you call a college, human beings are not the infinitely malleable creatures of Marxist sociological analysis. There is such a thing as human nature and there are objective, neuro-endocrinological/psycho-physiological underpinnings that genetically pre-determine much of the content of human social behaviour. In the final analysis, who and what we are as human beings is largely fixed by both social interaction with others and the allele-based mechanisms characteristic of hereditarianism.

    As I have always said, any empirical observation of the conduct of the average woman always vindicates the central tenets of Freudian psychoanalysis. You really are a frigid Anglo-Saxon castratrix, aren’t you? Every single remark you have made against the men of this site has been especially designed to psychologically emasculate their personalities of whatever traces of masculinity they may possess.

    It is certainly true that men are not only physically stronger than women, but also have considerably bigger brains and higher IQs than women. If you have such a bad case of gender dysphoria and penis envy, why not go to the doctor and get a sex change?

  11. Commander Scott Says:

    Commander Scott said:

    agentofdesire said:

    L said:

    agentofdesire said:

    CS what on earth makes you think you have the power to tell me what to do?

    Probably the fact that he’s a man, and you’re a woman.
    Which begs the question, why aren’t you doing as he says? Ah well.

    Thank f*** for the disintegration of forced marriage. The only way Commander Scott could ever have had a woman is through forced marriage…but thank f*** for womankind that no woman is forced to sleep anywhere near him….and no laws are left that give license to this freaky self-appointed entitlement that men like CS think they have, to order women about.

    The complete absence of forced marriage, or “concubinatus servus” as the ancient Romans called it, would never prevent me from having coitus with another woman. As a matter of fact, I’ve brutally raped and beaten into bloody pulps thousands of Protestant Anglo-Saxon females, such as yourself, all over the surface of our great Earth.

    frigidagentofcastration:

    Take a stand for human freedom and stop reading Karl Marx and Friedrich Engels for a change!

  12. Commander Scott Says:

    Erick said:

    Her name is agentofdesire? Like dick said, all women are whores.

    To begin with, the only reason why any woman is raped is because women have a strong natural repugnance towards all natural expressions of the heterosexual instinct. If women do not wish to be raped, they should cease being frigid, and grow sex drives.

  13. girlgirl Says:

    look like the boys here have had a bad childhood…..poor things

  14. Deathslayer Says:

    look like the boys here have had a bad childhood…..poor things
    *
    Looks like girlgirl missed her father…she’s as irritating as her mother, so dad wisely left both of them alone.

    Deathslayer

  15. Detached Says:

    Ignore the cock holsters gents. They will get tired and see a different shiny. They always have a “cause” to attend.

  16. Matt Says:

    Deathslayer said:

    Looks like girlgirl missed her father…she’s as irritating as her mother, so dad wisely left both of them alone.

    Deathslayer

    I think girlgirl wanted to fuck her dad because he gave her mom all the attention.

  17. girlgirl Says:

    Matt said:

    Deathslayer said:

    Looks like girlgirl missed her father…she’s as irritating as her mother, so dad wisely left both of them alone.

    Deathslayer

    I think girlgirl wanted to fuck her dad because he gave her mom all the attention.

    not a very intelligent or surprising answer……come on cant you do better than this……this is no way to show men are better……..

  18. Deathslayer Says:

    this is no way to show men are better……..
    *
    Sure it is. We’re lowering ourselves to fight on an attention whore’s level.

    Men with honor fight fair, and attacking an intellectual and physical unequal is not honorable. So, our responses are ones you could clearly understand, and thus we know that they were ineffective because women tend to think it gives them brownie points to attack men but a man is weak for attacking a woman.

    So, we’ll just be content in watching you get older, alone, angrier and keep blaming us until we just ignore you and then watch you blame each other for your unhappiness.

    Thing is, men don’t have to prove we are better to women…we prove it to ourselves.

    Deathslayer

  19. Cristina Says:

    It’s interesting how if a woman likes sex, she’s automatically considered a whore, but if she doesn’t she’s a prude and a bitch. We lose either way.

    Go to hell Dick.

  20. Matt Says:

    Cristina said:

    It’s interesting how if a woman likes sex, she’s automatically considered a whore, but if she doesn’t she’s a prude and a bitch. We lose either way.

    Go to hell Dick.

    What? Who gave you that idea? All women are whores. Including you

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