Why women hate sex.
Out of all the problems that have ever or will ever exist on the Earth, there is only one that men haven’t and will never be able to solve — not because they can’t, because that’s ridiculous, but because the problem is unsolvable by design. Women hate sex.
That’s it, there you have it. The end-all, be-all of cluster fucks. But why?
Do women hate sex — and they do — because of some kind of woman-guilt from an outdated puritan societal dogma? Or perhaps a stigma of guilt or a fear of abandonment? No. None of these things are it. Women hate sex simply because they are lousy at it.
This can be proved in a quick stroll down the checkout aisle at your local market of groceries — a place thick to the rafters with women. Take a look at some of their magazines and you will no doubt see a running theme: ‘Ten Ways to not suck in bed’, ‘Six Things to do to Your Man that aren’t Lay There Like a Futon’, and ‘Honestly who gives half a fuck about socks being on or off? Jesus Christ that’s pathetic’.
Also, much in the same way that a wall probably doesn’t like or doesn’t care about playing tennis with you, it’s definitely not your fault. Don’t let your sympathetic male compassion get the better of you. You could be dancing around like a maniac and pulling stunts out of your figurative ass like Johnny Magic the Wicked Awesome — maybe some whirl-arounds and in your face spikes from across the court — it’s really up to you as the man — but no matter what, the wall will remain unfazed. It just sits there doing nothing like a lump on a log probably thinking that it wants a new expensive coat of paint.
This same theory can be applied to many other things as well. For example: that women hate problems.
In Chinese, the symbol for crisis is the same as opportunity. I haven’t looked that up, but I heard it from a man so it’s probably true because us men have something called integrity. This means that in a time of crisis, we men are at our show stopping best. Take a flat tire on a moonless night for instance. While a man is out changing nuts and bolts and doing all manner of screwing on the side of the road, will a woman so much as think to grab a flashlight and help? No.
That’s because women hate holding flashlights, because they are complete rubbish at it. Force a woman to hold a flashlight when it matters and you’re likely to catch her aiming it into the sky for absolutely no goddamn reason. You’re better off just duct taping it to a mailbox and catapulting it into space.
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If this guy is so wrong, why are so many women threatened and annoyed by this webiste? I love the female comments such as “look at you Dick who would fuck you?” and “who would want to date you Dick?” The truth is this guy probably gets a hell of a lot of action because human nature is such that Woman go back to the guy who in their own view treat them “badly”, as they feel its their own fault. Im 29 and I guess ive been with between 30 - 40 girls (I cant rem and no ive never been sad enough to keep track) and I can count on 1 hand those who I rem as “a good shag” but not one of them will think its their doing. A few opinions on this site are a little outdated but generally speaking this guy has it right, and dares to speak out against the bullshit “equality” that society pushes onto everyone. If we were unfortunate to have a nuclear war tomorow and Im sure in the aftermath the world wouldnt be rebuilt by women…. just my view
Did it occur to you that YOU are the problem? You fuck 50 guys and none of them can get you off, therefore it must be their fault?
Typical woman logic.
what a fucking dick maybe its because you just cant get sex i mean look at you and your attitute who would want to have sex with you
PS> Robin Williams quotes it perfectly
“And then you realize that God gave you a penis and a brain, … and only enough blood to run one at a time.”
http://youtube.com/watch?v=mGP4QZxfe7c&feature=related
That whole Live show is really really funny, in my opinion! If you want to watch the whole thing, start at number 1/10, all the successive clips are there.
Have fun!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
OK I just had to post on this ridiculous site. I couldn’t resist. Let’s get this straight: If all the women in the world died out in a second, yes all the men would die out eventually too. I don’t think that men would even be able to try and imitate pregnancy in themselves because firstly, men lack the necessary organs for gestation and parturition, and secondly, men (as of yet) still haven’t learned exactly how pregnancy works specifically, so they wouldn’t be able to successfully create and maintain it themselves.
About women hating sex- I will happily admit that the only reasons I’ve had to hate sex (temporarily) were provided to me by really really inadequate and horrible experiences with guys in my past. BUT I have, of course, also had a quite a few rather amazing experiences with my fiancé.
Ok guys, you say all women are whores. Yet the majority of average men sleep around the same as, if not more than women. But they’re “Studs” right?? LOL That double standard is always just as hilarious as it is transparent.
Anyways, this is coming from a self-proclaimed ‘whore’:
The only reason I chose to screw as many guys as I did was because none of them satisfied me. None of them ever seriously tried to get me off, none of them ever had as much endurance as me, and when I left each guy (because I could no longer tolerate the boredom he inevitably caused me) for the next one, the one I left always behaved like a lost beaten puppy. Every. Single. Time. So yes, I unashamedly acted like a whore. But only because all the guys I encountered were so inadequate to my desires and sexual needs.
Now of course, I’ve finally found the one who does it best for me, in every way imaginable. Which is why I’m marrying him. AND I can confidently know that I’ll never cheat on him, because what’s the point of ruining my love and intimacy with my soul mate for sex with a guy or guys that would undoubtedly NOT be worth it? I already know the majority of all the other guys out there probably wouldn’t be able to satisfy me.
Quod Erat Demonstrandum?
…fuck off.
i’ m a man i like sex,but something that bother me ,is most woman don’t enjoy sex,they dont know how much enjoyment u get when u r doin sex
men and women are and will always be different from each other. you cannot expect a woman to be like a man or a man to be like a woman. which you think is better is your own opinion-which we all have, but God didn’t make a mistake. The way people are growing up..is the mistake in itself. Why cant we teach the girls and women about cars…if they drive one..they should know the essentials of keeping it running. You can’t deny that their are men out their who are a lot weaker than a woman.
See, you just prove Dick right with your pathetic attempt to cover your own unhappiness. “other ways of pleasuring” like bitching around? Also, be assured that there is no reason to feel BAD for us men. Trust me, being a man is pretty awesome. No tits flying around when you do sports, no bleeding every few weeks for no fucking reason, also we don’t have to use make up and shit like that…. etc… etc… etc…
Fail satire is fail. DD;
How much stupidty can you spit out in one paragraph?
oh I lost count.
Men have been impregnating women for eons and how long has porn been around? Maybe a century? Damn what a heavy dose of ignorance that exudes from your tiny brain.
And I bet you wonder why men don’t give a shit what you say.
What kind of logic is that? Oh yeah female logic the no-logical thought kind.
Shut the fuck up.
Well whether or not women hate sex and men are overall better than women, the Lassiter High School Marching Band out of Marietta, Georgia is by far the best high school marching band in the United States.
You see, this is what I’m talking about. “Women hate sex because they are lousy at it”?
This leads me to believe that Mr. Dick would rather have sex with men…
OH let me explain then, one’s a revelation someone had that they might not be the best leader and the second one’s a childish passing of the buck to avoid self-critism dispite the fact no one really cares about the subject.
We’d prolly blow up Iraq or something and then blame it on our periods!
Yeah, and that’s so much less a good reason than blowing it up and then blaming it on faulty intelligence. Oh wait, I can’t see a real big difference there.
is there any person out there who doesn’t complain about the opposite sex????
and anyway guys pleasure girls, girls pleasure guys so why cant you just all be friends about it
All I have to say is, I love sex. I mean of course there are those women who dont enjoy it because they dont know what theyre doing, which is why women should read those magazines. The only reason men know how to do it is because they watch so much porn! I totally agree with claire, this is sight hilarious but only because its full of bull shit. But its still funny how there are movies and websites and books about what scum bags men are, but as soon as someone does it to a man, all hell breaks loose! I’ll admit, men are the dominant gender because of their strength, but women can contribute in other ways like with compassion and intelligence. There are so many intelligent ladies out there, like me! But I also agree, women couldnt be a president. We’d prolly blow up Iraq or something and then blame it on our periods! But, all I have to say is both men and women have different characteristics which make them better in different ways. Also I just have one question.. dick are you gay? i mean i have nothing against homosexuals it would just make sence.
No, it’s because you just lay there like a cold fish and expect men to do all the work THEN whine about him not doing it right. If women were so good at sex the Cosmopolitan wouldn’t have vajayjay lessons in it every issue.