Why women hate sex.
Out of all the problems that have ever or will ever exist on the Earth, there is only one that men haven’t and will never be able to solve — not because they can’t, because that’s ridiculous, but because the problem is unsolvable by design. Women hate sex.
That’s it, there you have it. The end-all, be-all of cluster fucks. But why?
Do women hate sex — and they do — because of some kind of woman-guilt from an outdated puritan societal dogma? Or perhaps a stigma of guilt or a fear of abandonment? No. None of these things are it. Women hate sex simply because they are lousy at it.
This can be proved in a quick stroll down the checkout aisle at your local market of groceries — a place thick to the rafters with women. Take a look at some of their magazines and you will no doubt see a running theme: ‘Ten Ways to not suck in bed’, ‘Six Things to do to Your Man that aren’t Lay There Like a Futon’, and ‘Honestly who gives half a fuck about socks being on or off? Jesus Christ that’s pathetic’.
Also, much in the same way that a wall probably doesn’t like or doesn’t care about playing tennis with you, it’s definitely not your fault. Don’t let your sympathetic male compassion get the better of you. You could be dancing around like a maniac and pulling stunts out of your figurative ass like Johnny Magic the Wicked Awesome — maybe some whirl-arounds and in your face spikes from across the court — it’s really up to you as the man — but no matter what, the wall will remain unfazed. It just sits there doing nothing like a lump on a log probably thinking that it wants a new expensive coat of paint.
This same theory can be applied to many other things as well. For example: that women hate problems.
In Chinese, the symbol for crisis is the same as opportunity. I haven’t looked that up, but I heard it from a man so it’s probably true because us men have something called integrity. This means that in a time of crisis, we men are at our show stopping best. Take a flat tire on a moonless night for instance. While a man is out changing nuts and bolts and doing all manner of screwing on the side of the road, will a woman so much as think to grab a flashlight and help? No.
That’s because women hate holding flashlights, because they are complete rubbish at it. Force a woman to hold a flashlight when it matters and you’re likely to catch her aiming it into the sky for absolutely no goddamn reason. You’re better off just duct taping it to a mailbox and catapulting it into space.
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****Spoken from someone who did her own daddy and all his friends by age 5.
-Raises hand- Question for you, sweetie? What exactly are you using as a scale here? If women are bad at sex, how would you know? Especially if you haven’t ever been with a man. For all you know, you could be asexual or autosexual (which is when you can only get off with yourself, you see). You’re ging to have to try a lot harder if you want to keep trolling the internet.
Yes love the way she calls who is entitled to a blowjob, but aint that typical
I think women enjoy sex. Its just that every frickin’ emotional nuance of a woman must be completely satisfied for them to want to have it with you. Ugh. On the other hand, we men can mate at the drop a g string.
If women enjoy sex, how come male prostitutes are rarer than Bigfoot? Except the ones who cater for the needs/desires of gay men, of course. So what you say is bullshit, clearly. Try to bring your brain-cell to the table, next time.
And you can fuck off this website. Woman, you fail by default; NO WOMEN ALLOWED.
So I really don’t believe this man has ever had sex in his life. The reason for this belief is that if he had he would know that women don’t hate sex, most quite enjoy it, in fact. So either he has never had sex or he is really, really bad at it so any woman he did have sex with didn’t want to have sex with him again, making him believe that women don’t like it.
Seriously though, you are truly an idiot, thank you for showing me the true stupidity of some men.
By the way I’m voting for Hillary
americans are really clever u now ha ha ha
To be specific, that manhole is inciting hatred against manholes and encouraging domestic violence as an athletic, relaxing method of stress relief.
Horseshit; garbage.
Namecalling! Because throwing childish insults are the best way to prove you’re smarter then someone.
You are such a fucking dumbass, calling women dumb. and now saying that we can’t please our men. I’m sorry to say that your a FUCKING RETARD. You are just gay and can’t get laid. So you think that we can’t please you. Just admit that you’re gay and go get fucked in the ass. Okay. Let men give you the pleasure you want. You fucking homo.
Common Knowledge: The ones calling people gay are usually the ones really really confused about themselves.
DICK MASTERSON IS WITH NO DOUBT, GAY! GAY! GAY! HOW CAN HE HATE WOMEN. WOMEN STAND BY THE MAN AT ALL TIMES AND JUST LIKE MEN, ENJOY SEX WITH THE LOVE OF THEIR LIFE. DICK ONLY LOVES GUYS, I BET HE HAD SEX WITH TWENTY GUYS. HOW GAY IS THAT?
Care to join me in the Pleasuredome, Doubt? Just Kidding :)
The world is my oyster. hahahahahha….
I think the concept of marriage is pretty retarded and largely unneccessary, so probably not. But we’ll see what happens when the latest man gets sick of my shit, capisce? XD
I know it’s wrong to queer-bash, but the manholes make it too fucking easy. Apparantly the concept of biological sexuality does not register for fucktards who perform sodomy for attention.
Oh, god. And you like lots of sex? Will you marry me?
It’s me again.
Look, now, I’ve gone and gotten all addicted to your brilliant website.
Fist of all, Dick, I must call you out on one thing. We don’t *all* hate sex. By and large, maybe (I don’t really know, because I tend not to talk to most other women because I find them… pedantic, dull, vapid, malicious, and irritating), but I’ve got to say, I have a fucking ridiculous sex drive. I am a straight, 23 year-old female with the sex drive of a sixteen-year-old boy. Sure I’m a whore, but at least I can admit it.
All that shit aside, though, check it. I know how to take care of a man. I’ve got coffee and breakfast made for my boyfriend before he opens his eyes in the morning. His laundry done, his shirt pressed, his shower running when he gets up; dinner waiting when he gets home. Sure, I’m submissive, but I dig that sort of thing.
And I am fully willing to admit that I have penis envy. Long have I yearned for the veritable symbol of virility that only men are allowed. Since I was a wee girl, in fact. And boy howdy, I am still straight.
Dick, my man, I hope you’re getting good blowjobs on a regular basis. You, sir, are entitled to them.