Why women hate sex.
Out of all the problems that have ever or will ever exist on the Earth, there is only one that men haven’t and will never be able to solve — not because they can’t, because that’s ridiculous, but because the problem is unsolvable by design. Women hate sex.
That’s it, there you have it. The end-all, be-all of cluster fucks. But why?
Do women hate sex — and they do — because of some kind of woman-guilt from an outdated puritan societal dogma? Or perhaps a stigma of guilt or a fear of abandonment? No. None of these things are it. Women hate sex simply because they are lousy at it.
This can be proved in a quick stroll down the checkout aisle at your local market of groceries — a place thick to the rafters with women. Take a look at some of their magazines and you will no doubt see a running theme: ‘Ten Ways to not suck in bed’, ‘Six Things to do to Your Man that aren’t Lay There Like a Futon’, and ‘Honestly who gives half a fuck about socks being on or off? Jesus Christ that’s pathetic’.
Also, much in the same way that a wall probably doesn’t like or doesn’t care about playing tennis with you, it’s definitely not your fault. Don’t let your sympathetic male compassion get the better of you. You could be dancing around like a maniac and pulling stunts out of your figurative ass like Johnny Magic the Wicked Awesome — maybe some whirl-arounds and in your face spikes from across the court — it’s really up to you as the man — but no matter what, the wall will remain unfazed. It just sits there doing nothing like a lump on a log probably thinking that it wants a new expensive coat of paint.
This same theory can be applied to many other things as well. For example: that women hate problems.
In Chinese, the symbol for crisis is the same as opportunity. I haven’t looked that up, but I heard it from a man so it’s probably true because us men have something called integrity. This means that in a time of crisis, we men are at our show stopping best. Take a flat tire on a moonless night for instance. While a man is out changing nuts and bolts and doing all manner of screwing on the side of the road, will a woman so much as think to grab a flashlight and help? No.
That’s because women hate holding flashlights, because they are complete rubbish at it. Force a woman to hold a flashlight when it matters and you’re likely to catch her aiming it into the sky for absolutely no goddamn reason. You’re better off just duct taping it to a mailbox and catapulting it into space.
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The English Victorians, as well as their Western European and American counterparts, strike us as quite puritanical and repressive in terms of their moral and socio-political stances. However, it is to their credit that they truly recognized the lower level of of female sexual desire for what it was, as well as the total absence of any tangible evidence for female sexual insatiability (nymphomania). Of all the observations made by the medical authorities of nineteenth century England and America, it cannot but help be noticed that they achieve a certain unanimity of opinion when speaking of the lack of female sexual impulse. Many of the most celebrated physicians of the day argued that women cannot be described as physical creatures amenable to the influence of any known sexual passion. Many even went so far as to suggest that the ascription of sexual passion to the woman was akin to making a vile calumny against an innocent bystander’s character. However, others disagreed and were grudgingly willing to concede that the majority of women possess a very slight sex drive, very much mild in comparison to the potency and urgency of the truly explosive male libido. Most were of the opinion that whatever the actual level of female sex drive itself, the overwhelming majority of women, with a characteristic uniformity that reflects the underlying psycho-physiological reality that sharply differentiates the two sexes, have considerably lower sex drives than men do.
Indeed, it was frequently noted by many a physician of the late nineteenth century that all women, or atleast a significant majority of them, possessed no sex drive whatsoever and were incapable of expressing any truly urgent or autonomous level of sexual desire. Of this, one of the more literary exponents of nineteenth century female passionlessness was an English physician named William Acton. He argued that God himself had personally created the woman as a being largely indifferent to the natural processes of human sexuality, patiently enduring the lustful advances of other men as so many tortures of the damned in hell. To Acton, this interpretation made sense, given the limited amount of vital fluid produced by the testis of each male, the complete drainage of which could prove devastating to the male temperament. In a textbook circulated throughout the length and breadth of the British Empire, Dr. William Acton writes:
I should say that the majority of women (happily for society) are not very much troubled by sexual feeling of any kind. What men are habitually, women are only exceptionally… there can be no doubt that sexual feeling in the female is in the majority of cases in abeyance, and that it requires positive and considerable excitement to be roused at all: and even if roused (which in many instances it never can be) it is very moderate compared with that of the male… I am ready to maintain that there are many females who never feel any sexual excitement whatever. Others, again, immediately after each period, do become to a limited degree, capable of experiencing it; but this capacity is often temporary, and may entirely cease until the next menstrual period. Many of the best wives, mothers, and managers of households, know little of or are careless of sexual indulgences. Love of home, of children, and of domestic duties are the only passions they feel.
As a general rule, a modest woman seldom desires any sexual gratification for herself. She submits to her husbands embraces, but principally to gratify him; and, were it not for the desire for maternity, would far rather be relieved from his attentions… the married woman has no wish to be placed on the footing of a mistress. (The Functions and Disorders of the Reproductive Organs, in Childhood, Youth, Adult Age and Advanced Life, pg. 162-164)
Many observers on the European continent also came to the conclusion that women were nonsexual creatures; the manifestation of sexual passion within any female was seen as a species of grave mental illness requiring institutionalization within a sanatorium specializing in intensive treatment. The distinguished German neurologist and pioneer in the art of hypnotism, Richard von Krafft-Ebbing eloquently stated quite succinctly in his book, Psychopathia Sexualis, that
Man has beyond doubt the stronger sexual appetite of the two. From the period of pubescence he is instinctively drawn towards woman. His love is sensual, and his choice is strongly prejudiced in favour of physical attractions. A mighty impulse of nature makes him aggressive and impetuous in his courtship. Yet the law of nature does not wholly fill his psychic being. Having won the prize, his love is temporarily eclipsed by other vital and social interests.
Woman, however, if physically and mentally normal, and properly educated, has but little sensual desire. If it were otherwise, marriage and family life would be empty words. As yet the man who avoids women, and the woman who seeks men are sheer anomalies. (pg. 8)
In a similar vein, George Napheys observed that “only in very rare instances do women feel one tithe of the sexual feeling which is familiar to most men. Many of them are entirely frigid, and not even in marriage do they ever perceive any real desire.”(7) The only passion women were psycho-physiologically capable of experiencing, these manuals argued, was maternal, with predictable consequences for the female character.
To them, the ideal woman of the male erotic imagination, such as it was in late Victorian times, was as a frigid being, an angel on a pedestal, with little capacity for arousal and a strong natural repugnance to all forms of human sexuality. The more conspicuously intense the condition of anaesthesia sexualis, or complete extinction of sexual desire, in the woman, the greater her value as housewife and mother. Thus, having a reputation of great virtue became highly valued amongst a genteel female public. After all, it was the attainment of such a reputation that consequently led to the greater desirability of the female as a commodity within the bio-economic system of the heterosexual marketplace. By manipulating the imperiousness of male libido through the display of her feminine charms, she secures whatever money and power that can be had as the price for the full physiological realization of her maternal instinct. To the Romantics of the day, many of the most beautiful women were conceived of as creatures more frigid than ice, devoid of all erotic impulse. The more sanitized a woman was of her sexuality, the greater her worth and position in society.
If ever a stereotype had any truth, and many stereotypes do possess a grain of truth, there is none more true than this one. It is made seemingly inevitable by the psycho-physiological reality that teases apart the male libido and the frigid/oestral state of the female; it then takes both these halves and sets them up as two separate dimensions of the same reality. Many stereotypes can be highly rational in logical structure, such as being stylistically coherent, adhering to the principle of noncontradiction and internal self-consistency. The rational stereotype can also be based objectively on the sensory impressions derived from external reality. These can be rigorously evaluated according to the tools of scientific methodology and statistical analysis, those vital instruments which regularly guide investigations into natural phenomena.
A stereotype need not be structured around such heights of incoherence as to wilfully posit that all the elements of a set are uniform in the possession of a certain trait in order to be considered a stereotypical judgment. All it need demonstrate is that a certain trait or collection of traits revolve around a number of statistical polarities along a bell curve distribution. It is this last property that renders such an assertion susceptible to any empirical evaluation as to its corresponding level of veracity, as can ultimately be discerned from its basic structure. The notion of stereotype can be defined as a statistical generalization based on the relative probability of trait possession, whose validity can be verified mathematically by means of a series of Bayesian statistical formulae, typically of the form
P x (A\B) = P x (B\A) x P x (A)/P x (B)
where P x (A) and P x (B) is the marginal probability of A and B is the probability of one event not tied to the simultaneous occurrence of any other event, and that P x (A\B) and P x (B\A) is the conditional probability A or B, given the occurrence of B or A.
The stereotype that the generality of women hate sex is not an irrational stereotype, but a statistical generalization based on a large amount of empirical information that lend a high degree of conditional probability to the factuality of the argument itself.
It is a scientific fact that the overwhelming majority of women have significantly lower sex drives than men or are completely frigid; few women have strong passions so overwhelming as to be difficult to control. In addition, women have considerably lower levels of both sexual motivation and interest than men. Furthermore, it has been known for hundreds of years that women also demonstrate significantly lower levels of sexual physiological arousibility than men. There is an abundance of scientific data, drawn extensively from the disciplines of endocrinology, biochemistry, molecular genetics, neurology, evolutionary biology, and social psychology, pointing in this direction. If one defines sex drive as frequency and intensity of desire for sexual gratification for its own sake, then women possess very little or no sexual desire whatsoever.
Welcome to the website Lisa, now get the fuck out.
Entitled, selfish Anglo-American teen-aged girls open and honest? Do you mind telling me what drugs you are abusing today? I could use a good hit.
LOL…. Loved your website, found it both amusing and informative.
I don’t think men & women are so far apart… many woman have similar conversations about men (just in case you did not realize, *grin*)
And… typical of both sexes…. your posters are made up of about 90% idiots, with 10% sounding intelligent. No doubt because the more intelligent tend to fill their time with far more productive activities…
Lisa.
Yes, Michael, bola was just kidding about his penis size - at least I thaught so, I have a feeling that you are competent and that you are not young, so to repeat my question to you; do you do street pickup?
@Micheal- your future with women: “Down you go, suffer long….” Stone Temple Pilots, circa 1993.
I think you have a problem understanding sarcasm.
Ahhh…you must by young! You will see…..hahaha…we will see what side of the fence your on 20 yrs from now, Micheal.
I think there is variation. Some women have a great sex drive and so the requirements for emotional security (whatever it is: arm muscles, money, confidence, maybe all) are relatively easy to pass over. For others the emotional requirements are quite high and to men seem not based on logic and therefore are ridiculous. You meet more of the later kind as you get older and so it takes so much time to manuveur through these requirements that its not worth it anymore, as so that is why I am participating, as one poster put it, in “self-exclusion.” Too bad b/c I think I’m fairly generous guy, if I may say so. But at least I’ll have a nice retirement.
A woman who is genuinely sexually attracted to her mate is always turned on. Sexual attraction, I mean, real sexual attraction is impossible to turn off. Differences of opinion can come and go, sexual chemistry does not.
We half agree. I agree that women can only have consensual sex with a stranger who they believe they are in no danger of. I disagree that this makes the women feel sexual attraction. Women can have sex without feeling physical attraction, just as men can. The biological impetus is primarily imperative. The only necessary condition to be fulfilled is to make the woman feel ‘not threatened’. I didn’t type ’safe’ or ’secure’ because I feel they are different - I perceive them as on an emotional plane - and I don’t believe that women need to feel emotion to have sex, regardless of whether she deludes herself into believing this.
You do not have to be an alpha male to get sex. Women want sex just as much as men do, it’s just that they can’t act that way because of the potentially dangerous consequences of hitting on a stranger who could physically hurt them.
Dude, that works both ways. The reason so many men go to whores is because they can’t trust a woman to be completely honest with them. Too many women have sabatoged condoms, used false rape charges to seperate them from their children, and lied about the mailman’s child belonging to them. How the fuck can women want respect when they do nothing to their fellows when they pull such bullshit? As
Homosexual men have no problem getting sex - and they get the most sex - because physically they know they can have sex with a random male stranger and defend themselves from harm if things get rough/weird.
Who cares about gay men first of all? They are not important to the subject.
Not only that, just assuming they’re rape proof because they’re men is very stupid.
Women, however, really have no way to defend themselves from physical harm, therefore walking up to a random stranger and suggesting they have sex is a dangerous and foolhardly thing to do. It doesn’t mean they don’t want to do it, but it is potentially deadly, so they do not.
More bullshit, women are capable of learning ways to defend themselves. Even without them, there are many weapons of self-defense including tazers and mace. Stop assuming women are weak innocent princesses that never do wrong.
Women are not so stupid as to believe that every man they have sex with is going to be good in bed the first time they do it. They do, however, expect men to improve over time. As they should. Practice, as you say.
It is not just rhythm and size that are important. Position is also key. Physicality also comes into play. If a woman likes a certain position with one man, that does not mean that will be her favourite position with another man because a man’s upper body strength and height also determine whether a particular position with him is good or not.
Again, to expect men to improve while doing nothing is lazy. They’re quite capable of learning more about sex to improve the experiences. Also, stop preaching about how to have sex. Position is about as basic as it gets and to go on and on about it shows you really know nothing about sex.
I agree in part in what you say: there is no doubt about it, women need to feel secure to feel sexually attracted to a man. So its not unreasonable in my mind that a women would be hesitant to have a fling with a guy that she met in a bar. The problem I’m talking about is with a relationship. I think what happens to some men is that women lose interest in sex over time. A part of that I think is women seeing the man as no longer a “man” because he does not, in her eyes, give the sense of security that she needs to be sexually excited. This could be b/c he fails, in her mind, to satisfy her sense of security: for example, her career goes better than his, and she feels embarrassed to describe what he does for a living at a party. Its hard to break a women from this instinct, which I feel this is analogous to trying to break a man from the instinct of a women becoming sexually unattractive b/c she became obese.
Also what I’m referring to (what happened to me) is that when a man wont go along with how she feels about social issues and attitudes, then she loses sexual interest in him. I believe the cause here is feminism, which instills the notion that women are emotionally superior beings. If you dont match this view, the woman becomes angry and loses sexual attraction to you. I think if this attitude went away then women would see that his opinions are reasonable , she would not get so upset when he voiced them, and the mood would not be disrupted for her to be “turned on”.
Michael, do you do street pickup?
You do not have to be an alpha male to get sex. Women want sex just as much as men do, it’s just that they can’t act that way because of the potentially dangerous consequences of hitting on a stranger who could physically hurt them.
Homosexual men have no problem getting sex - and they get the most sex - because physically they know they can have sex with a random male stranger and defend themselves from harm if things get rough/weird.
Women, however, really have no way to defend themselves from physical harm, therefore walking up to a random stranger and suggesting they have sex is a dangerous and foolhardly thing to do. It doesn’t mean they don’t want to do it, but it is potentially deadly, so they do not.
Women are not so stupid as to believe that every man they have sex with is going to be good in bed the first time they do it. They do, however, expect men to improve over time. As they should. Practice, as you say.
It is not just rhythm and size that are important. Position is also key. Physicality also comes into play. If a woman likes a certain position with one man, that does not mean that will be her favourite position with another man because a man’s upper body strength and height also determine whether a particular position with him is good or not.
Maybe Micheal didn’t know that we have an experience too.
Studio, this is called a woman stuck in a man’s body.
It is made out of self-esteem issues and bullshit.
Now:
Your knowledge of sex couldn’t fill a pamplet. A woman’s pleasure is not completely dependant of the man’s size and ability. Even if the man has a small one women can get pleasure from it using kegals or PC exercises. Or she can find positions to suggest to her man so it’ll feel better. In fact there is so many ways for women to improve their experiences it’s not even funny. But instead they put all the fault on the man and expect the penis to act like a magical wand of pleasure to their trip to happyland. When women learn to stop treating sex as some rape tool and get confortable with their bodies THEN they can start complaining. And if a woman knows about kegals, they really wouldn’t have complaints in the first place. Hell even PMS can be reduced by days with bellydancing but women would rather rely on medicine with a plethora of side effects. So come back and talk about sex when you actually know about it, novice.
Then again, if it wasn’t for the fact that every stupid, insipid, emotional nuance of a woman needed to be satisfied in a woman in order to get sex, men get more practice. Women are too self-absorbed to understand that practice make perfect, as they expect every man to be a pre-fabricated alpha male. Female stupidity in action.
studioline, if I sound like a woman, it is because I have a vast experience of them. They are very open creatures. Honest. Unlike our kind.
Hmmm…diameter, radius, or circumference? Ive heard that there is correlation between these parameters and female satisfaction as opposed to length. Research is needed perhaps.