Why women hate sex.
Out of all the problems that have ever or will ever exist on the Earth, there is only one that men haven’t and will never be able to solve — not because they can’t, because that’s ridiculous, but because the problem is unsolvable by design. Women hate sex.
That’s it, there you have it. The end-all, be-all of cluster fucks. But why?
Do women hate sex — and they do — because of some kind of woman-guilt from an outdated puritan societal dogma? Or perhaps a stigma of guilt or a fear of abandonment? No. None of these things are it. Women hate sex simply because they are lousy at it.
This can be proved in a quick stroll down the checkout aisle at your local market of groceries — a place thick to the rafters with women. Take a look at some of their magazines and you will no doubt see a running theme: ‘Ten Ways to not suck in bed’, ‘Six Things to do to Your Man that aren’t Lay There Like a Futon’, and ‘Honestly who gives half a fuck about socks being on or off? Jesus Christ that’s pathetic’.
Also, much in the same way that a wall probably doesn’t like or doesn’t care about playing tennis with you, it’s definitely not your fault. Don’t let your sympathetic male compassion get the better of you. You could be dancing around like a maniac and pulling stunts out of your figurative ass like Johnny Magic the Wicked Awesome — maybe some whirl-arounds and in your face spikes from across the court — it’s really up to you as the man — but no matter what, the wall will remain unfazed. It just sits there doing nothing like a lump on a log probably thinking that it wants a new expensive coat of paint.
This same theory can be applied to many other things as well. For example: that women hate problems.
In Chinese, the symbol for crisis is the same as opportunity. I haven’t looked that up, but I heard it from a man so it’s probably true because us men have something called integrity. This means that in a time of crisis, we men are at our show stopping best. Take a flat tire on a moonless night for instance. While a man is out changing nuts and bolts and doing all manner of screwing on the side of the road, will a woman so much as think to grab a flashlight and help? No.
That’s because women hate holding flashlights, because they are complete rubbish at it. Force a woman to hold a flashlight when it matters and you’re likely to catch her aiming it into the sky for absolutely no goddamn reason. You’re better off just duct taping it to a mailbox and catapulting it into space.
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omg. Do you two need to get a room?
Lovely.
Outstanding.
I can add neither jot nor tittle to such wit, so I simply append my approval.
-wolfe.
Hmmm, perhaps he prefers not to see his wifey wife cavorting around on a men only site. Shock horror.
“Oh, and as far as I am aware, Mr. Masterson has never visited my blog. I learned of his website through another blogger.”
Do you know what an IP address is? Perhaps you should begin to log them as dick does, for he has already admitted on another thread that he has been posting on your site since earlier this year. If it’s under an alias, I just can’t imagine what niceness he must have been getting up to LOLZ.
re: nice v’s not nice comment. Your opinion is certainly in my dumpster.
“Having manners and being nice is not the same as having values and principles.”
I couldn’t agree more, Grump.
Arielle, what an excellent response to female.
Female, I could write a long post to you elucidating the number of ways that you are wrong in your 3:26 AM post. I know it will be a waste of time, though. Let’s just leave it at this: you are wrong. It’s not all that surprising, considering the fact that you are a woman uninspired by the intellect of a manly man. ;)
Abie, I - as a seasoned debater - used to waste many a long hour arguing with people on the internet. I used to watch those political debate programs often, and spent a great deal of time reading commentary from those I agreed with and disagreed with. I even went to the point of emailing the commentators with some questions or concerns. I’d often get responses! I would watch CNN, Fox, and MSNBC..programs like Crossfire and Reliable Sources. After spending so much wasted time, I came to the conclusion that you are wrong. I used to think like you, until I realized that most people aren’t as open-minded as they think they are.
Big Al, I’m just happy that I’m on the list!
“Men learn how to be civilized beings from women.”
*smirks* Having manners and being nice is not the same as having values and principles. Being an unprincipled woman, though, I don’t expect that you’d understand the difference. Don’t worry. You can’t help it, my dear!
Female,
My husband is aware that I visit this site, and I have regaled him with anecdotes from it before. He does not visit the site.
Oh, and as far as I am aware, Mr. Masterson has never visited my blog. I learned of his website through another blogger.
As to serving simply as a decoration - there are worse things to be. The Mona Lisa is a decoration, as are London’s Crown Jewels. Decorations are prized and cherished the world over. Useless and ugly items, on the other hand, end up in the trash.
Yes, I really think FM2 should have included you in her list wolfe. Somewhere mid range perhaps. Do you feel better now? Good.
Dick, did you get my menaresuchdumbarses xmas card? You are the poster boy for them after all. Saying women cannot be offended is incredibly stupid, but you are such a moron, I am not surprised by this comment at all. Do you think women do not have feelings? And as for that shite comment ” (women) have no priciples or values that were not expressly told to them by a man” what absolute crap. If anything it’s the other way around. Men learn how to be civilized beings from women. Perfect example of this is the difference between a man’s behaviour when he is with his mates compared to when he is with his female partner. Men tend to swear less and behave less like a clothed buffoon when women are around and other men aren’t. Stupid clowns.
As if a woman could actually be offended. They have no priciples or values that were not expressly told to them by a man. It’s not being offended so much as it’s a sham and an act. Just like everything else women can “be”.
-Dick
You mean you actually come to a site called ‘Men are better than women’ and dont expect the men to post anything that YOU would consider to be crass or offensive?
Thats like knowingly barging into a nudist camp and finding it crass and offensive that people are standing around naked.
The term ‘Mark2′ is generally used on improvements over previous models. Both models look seriously flawed to me.
I wish she’d put us in order. I aspire to heights of crassness and offensiveness, and it wounds to be just lumped in with the other guys like that.
Heck, at least you got a mention. I’d have thought I said something offensive somewhere, but I guess not…
-wolfe
If you found my post confusing then I doubt if an explanation would make much difference. But here goes:
There is a difference between posting the odd response, and believing that you are waging a crusade by posting a knee jerk response to almost everything written here.
I wish she’d put us in order. I aspire to heights of crassness and offensiveness, and it wounds to be just lumped in with the other guys like that.
Jezus you are a fucking ass aren’t you. My gripe here, everyone, in case you can’t tell is with DM. It began with him and it will finish with him. The rest of you who have posted to me, attacked me first. You can kid yourselves that you were simply retaliating in order to defend Dick, but excuse me, did Dick ask you to?
If I attacked you first, this would in my mind, justify your attacks on me. But did I? No I fucking didn’t. So, I really don’t care whether you find me annoying for I am the one who is perfectly justified in retaliating to your initial attacks upon me. The only person here who is actually justified in telling me to fuck off or that I am a bitch is in fact DM.
Once again, for the dummies, this is because 1. I attacked him first and 2. It is his fucking bandwidth after all. Nevertheless, Dick you know I think you’re a perfect asshole. Enjoy the festivities of the season xx.
Oldone, can you imagine that some people, sometimes, deliberately read thing they know they won’ t completely agree with? like debate? Trying to understand the other side’s arguments, and their objections on yours?
It’s very useful in scientifc speculation, you know, the kind that tries to present reliables facts rather than bitter generalizations…
Anyway, thanks for the laugh.
Tell me F.M2, why does female come here. The site is Called Men Are Better Than Women, its address is menarebetterthanwomen.com, it is made by a man for men and has in bold lettering: “No Women Allowed.? Female then comes here and is shocked and upset to find men discussing why we are better than women. Does anyone else see the dichotomy here?
“You are putting female down based on the fact that you think it is wrong of her to argue on her own and her sex’s behalf and you say that if your sons did the same then they should be ashamed.”
Her sex’s behalf? FemaleMark2, she does not speak for me. She speaks for herself and those who agree with her. Puh-lease…don’t pull that non-existent sisterhood crap.
I confess that on my first visit to this site (and perhaps because of the ever clinging remnants of feminism which still remain!), I was offended. I don’t agree with everything that Dick says even now (sorry, I don’t believe men are ‘better’ than women), and I did not like reading about women being irresponsible, lazy, inefficient communicators, or any other such things.
It wasn’t until I stepped back and asked myself whether there was any truth at all to Dick’s words, that I became honest with myself. I am irresponsible. I am lazy. I do treat my pets like they are children (no wonder why they don’t listen to me!).
“As an observer it seems to me the most crass, offensive posters are (in no particular order) Esther, Grump, yourself, George, Underground Patriot, Big AL and Geeza.”
I only behaved that way because female was an obvious troll. She is the one who started it. She is attempting to act as the feminist thought police, and that irritates me. I find it disgusting and hypocritical.
“Oh, women should have freedom and rights! But men shouldn’t have the right to free expression! Since I can’t take them away, I’ll punish them!”
How frickin’ childish!
Nonetheless, if I believed that my words would hurt her feelings, I don’t think I would ever have posted at all. I admit I did get a little peeved after her comments to oldone, but that is past. Generally, I just don’t take her seriously.
Whether you believe it or not, this is nothing personal. I post to her to satisfy my amusement. Nothing more and nothing less. She’s not the first troll I’ve dealt with in this fashion (although I admit that I’m a little less successful with her). It’s fun.
Speaking on a personal level though, I hope you and female have a happy holidays.
Okay. So you are trying to get her to stop misbehaving? In what way is she misbehaving? By name-calling? What are you yourself doing? As an observer it seems to me the most crass, offensive posters are (in no particular order) Esther, Grump, yourself, George, Underground Patriot, Big AL and Geeza. She has convinced me of the existence of both Man Rule 1 and 11.
No one here is arguing with, Female. We’re simply reprimanding a wayward mule for its poor behavior.
-Dick