Women Are Really Good At Being Sarcastic
Men, on the whole, are a race of funny mans. We joke and are good at joking because it makes us feel good. It makes everyone feel good. Laughing is for pleasure. But just like half of an Oreo cookie, there is a dark side to comedy: sarcasm.
Men wield sarcasm with extreme prejudice. Lining up a battalion of facts to decimate their opponents’ defenses and bullshit and then toppling their Saddam like statue of dignity with a cutting sarcastic remark.
Women do not.
Women handling sarcasm is like a viking charging into battle with a giant salami. Dumb and embarassing.
One of the biggest problems with women and sarcasm is they use it too much. Men know that sarcasm overuse makes one look simple and petulant, but women seem to have no problem with that. That’s because women enjoy looking ill-tempered and brackish. They think it empowers them and makes them look interesting while they actually have nothing to offer. That’s why they’re sarcastic as often as fucking possible.
Women also cannot be sarcastic properly because, like usual, they don’t understand what they’re trying to use. Just like when they’re trying to work a car or a computer or a menu, absolutely anything might happen if there isn’t a man there to call the shots — anything, but the right thing that is.
The key to sarcasm is the implication of a series of events that would allow the sarcastic remark to be true. Let’s take this sarcastic remark as an example: women make great voters.
Truly absurd indeed, but why does it work as sarcasm?
As men, the moment we hear that statement, we suspend our disbelief and imagine it to be true for just a second. That’s why we’re so good at being compassionate, because unlike women we can imagine ourselves in another’s shoes. After all, we men did invent diplomacy and peace treaties.
For the statement to be true, a great voter would have to be defined as someone who votes with their hormones or based on manic ravings that they heard from their friends. That is where the sarcasm hits us, when we see it was a trick all along to lead us to the true nature of the woman voter. Well done, I say.
Women can’t be sarcastic because they don’t think anything they say is true anyway. Whether it’s ‘I’m good at something’, ‘I love you’, or ‘I didn’t mean to fuck that up for the sixth time’. That’s why women are shitty at sarcasm, because in a way, everything they say is sarcastic.
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May 15th, 2006 at 9:06 am - IP Man-Hash: 9438f68e1c745
Another sex-based personal attack.
Whatever happened to destroying the other side’s arguments…
Although it’s highly amusing to see you guys (I’d love to say “we”, but still waiting for registration to come through) seem to hit a highly sensitive nerve with every single article. If anything the female comments are almost as amusing as the articles - they complete them, by proving the article’s point.
Hmm, better try and answer the woman, I have another 2 hours before the College Republicans dinner…
Sally, how on Earth do you expect men to treat you as anything other than a sex object if yourself cannot reply to a well-written argument with anything other than sex-based comments? It seems that for most women life revolves mainly around their crotch, and women are thus unable to think any further. I know evolution made you that way, as historically men were mostly in charge (thankfully), but if you want to be taken seriously you’ll have to reply seriously. I know it’s possible, I know quite a few women who are able to hold a conversation with a man. You’re just not one of them, at least from what I’ve read from you.
Thanks for taking the time to read.
May 15th, 2006 at 2:24 pm - IP Man-Hash: b39671b23df39
Bob, welcome to the site. Your account should be active in the forum now.
-Dick
May 15th, 2006 at 4:49 pm - IP Man-Hash: b077f28046aef
sally said:
Its like shooting fish in a barrel today!
All I’d like to say, is that I am sorry for the pathetic men who feel so threatened by women that they must start a web site or visit a web site, entitled “menarebetterthanwomen.com”.
Please note that she “feels” sorry for us. It is I who feel sorry for you Sally. Obviously your “feelings” got in the way of making some sort of rational argument. Do you often personally attack people that you don’t know by calling them pathetic? What makes you think that we feel threatened? Do we have another Jr. therapist on our hands? Please give me your professional opinion Dr. Sally. Do I hate my father? Or was I threated by my mother? What causes me to visit this website? You must know all the anwsers by now, I mean what would Dr. Phil say?
At first I was offended when I unfortunately stumbled upon this ignorant, condesending web page, but it is more than obvoius that it is only a result of insecure men who probably have never had luck with women because, CLEARLY, you are all too simple minded to even come close to understanding us. So, keep on posting your stupid thoughts on women to feel better about your small dicks and lack of confidence in this world. Oh, and FUCK YOU!!!!!!
Hmm, I will note the laws of women (once again) and your basic bullshit analysis from a womans point of view. I wonder if Ol’ Dick struck a nerve somewhere in that tiny hormone imbalanced head of yours? I would imagine that trying to understand women is what this website is all about, it seems to be working rather well.
Strength and Honor
May 15th, 2006 at 9:24 pm - IP Man-Hash: 8f5fa079b338a
I can’t speak for anyone else, but I have never felt threatened by a woman. Even when the skank — sorry, my ex — assaulted me, I didn’t feel particularly threatened. Well, ok, I should amend that: I considered it possible that she might dig into my gun cabinet and come up with a weapon actually capable of harming me where her bare hands and fists couldn’t, so my first move was to secure my firearms from her. But aside from that, I’ve never felt threatened by a woman. Never. Women simply aren’t threatening on any level.
I know you’ll never believe this, but I’ve understood the women I’ve been close to better than they understand themselves. I think that in general, women are too overcome with their emotions to engage in the kind of self-examination really necessary to understand one’s own psyche. I think a woman can do so if she’s really motivated, but very few ever are.
As always, it revolves around the penis for women. I’ve never really understood why women are so obsessed with them. Is it that they spend so much time competing with each other to look better than the next woman, and so they project this competition onto men in the only way that they can? I don’t know … I do wish someone would explain it, because it always seems really, really petty.
Well, no doubt at some point in the near future. Right now I’m bunking my kids, so seeing my girlfriend for sex isn’t really possible. But I appreciate the sentiment.
May 21st, 2006 at 10:14 pm - IP Man-Hash: e6a61478d9095
I bet that most of the comments that hit out against the author of the topic are from women. If there is a male among them I can only say that he is a sub specie of man…What we call a WUSSY!. He probably gets kicks out of sniffing oestrogen and calls himself confidently “A Man” like danny devito says he’s tall.
As for Sally, Her outbursts confirms the truth of the article. Please go sit on something and smile for a change.
May 22nd, 2006 at 3:08 am - IP Man-Hash: 05876c7260a2f
pop eye, you’re right, he, whoever he is, probably does get a high from oestrogen sniffing, they’re called pheronomes.
May 22nd, 2006 at 12:00 pm - IP Man-Hash: b39671b23df39
So you’re a biologist now, Fem? What a laugh.
-Dick
May 22nd, 2006 at 4:31 pm - IP Man-Hash: eadd56da2c7c9
No they’re not. They’re called pheromones.
-Big Al
May 22nd, 2006 at 4:47 pm - IP Man-Hash: b39671b23df39
Wow. I just had a tremendous laugh at Female’s expense on that one. Nice, Big Al.
-Dick
May 22nd, 2006 at 4:50 pm - IP Man-Hash: 51b20c9205849
Maybe Fem was thinking of pheroGnomes.
May 22nd, 2006 at 8:00 pm - IP Man-Hash: eadd56da2c7c9
She was just pheroMoaning.
-Big Al
June 18th, 2006 at 3:22 pm - IP Man-Hash: 980cc8a8ac1a7
Amasing to the extent of comical how law abiding female visitors of this site are, on whole. Seldom do you see deviant behaviour. Some few misdemeanours here and there and some scarce convicted criminals like Arielle only.
The laws of women I mean as cited by older, more knowledgeable and experienced people here.
If it’s not the phalic reference it’s the gay angle, or the ‘yo mamma shudda had a termination when she had you’ approach.
Though there was this one rather more original female poster. She cordially wished us Godspeed on our shorter than women’s course to death.
Maybe she was trying to pass a bill for a new law through the house? She ain’t payin’ it, obviously. Quaint.
June 18th, 2006 at 5:10 pm - IP Man-Hash: 442ae7cfaf56b
As one of the feminazy stated at the “pro-abortion” rally.
“the only reason I am here is because my mother did not have a choice”.
September 12th, 2006 at 2:47 pm - IP Man-Hash: bccb9970f4a6d
Kudos guys. You probably don’t care about a mere females opinion but I truely found the article, replies and site highly amusing. So much so that I’m sending the link out to all my friends, male and female.
I would not deem myself worthy to cross swords with such masters so I’ll take the only recourse I have as a female and give in without even trying. :)
September 12th, 2006 at 3:17 pm - IP Man-Hash: 980cc8a8ac1a7
Better yet, put out.
September 12th, 2006 at 3:36 pm - IP Man-Hash: 6897e3ddf8ad0
cyan, that’s what I call female wisdom. Though not as good as man-wisdom, it does have its merits.
Appreciated.
-Dick
September 16th, 2006 at 10:38 am - IP Man-Hash: 88c1e58dc3ca7
is that because you don’t call a spade a spade [as in a heart with [a] tail]…
…that’s f’in sarcasm at its best you dinks, but i think you know that…
…just like you know that ’sonyad’ has an arsenal of strap-ons for…pleasure…
[cyan, i've instructed my gardener to keep your nic in mind while he's trimming the trim...]
September 16th, 2006 at 12:43 pm - IP Man-Hash: 980cc8a8ac1a7
Projecting, are we? I actually make due with 4 wheels and a car for that. Sometimes 2 wheels and a mountain bike instead.
September 17th, 2006 at 5:29 am - IP Man-Hash: 48e0f6600996e
Nope. She was just trying to be sarcastic, and failed. When will women ever learn?
November 5th, 2006 at 3:09 pm - IP Man-Hash: 6f5d97a41ef2f
As a female, i really don’t see a problem with this article or the site itself. There is probably a female equivalent to this website, so i suggest any insulted females should consult and whine there.
There is truth in this article, women do over use sarcasm way too much, it’s a simple fact, though I do think some of it is dragging the whole issue a little to far.
You make your point, but if you don’t want these simple minded bitches on here whining about how you insulted them, perhaps you should change the wording to something more intelligent so they won’t understand the article at all.
Read musie’s comment, it makes sense and is true.