Women Are Ruining Strip Clubs: Part 2
Women wear lipstick and blush to simulate the increased blood flow in their faces during sex. They wear eye shadow so their eyes look bigger and their pupils more dilated — just like during sex. They wear necklaces to draw attention to their cleavage, which reminds men of the butt — sexually, and they grow their nails out to look easily rape-able.
What the fuck does a purse say about sex? I remembered to bring condoms?
Thanks for nothing. Condoms are stupid.
I want to see a stripper with a purse as much as I want to see her with a 300 pound bouncer while she’s walking to her car. Purses are annoying and they ruin strip clubs.
Nice work. You remembered to bring condoms for all the sex we won’t be having. Thanks for reminding me.
Women are ruining strip clubs.
Unless you’re married to a drag queen, there’s no chance in hell a feather boa and seven inch platform Chuck Taylor All-Stars are going to remind you of your wife. That’s what strip clubs are all about after all: wives. They’re not selfishly about men wanting to see naked women. They are much more unselfishly about the women we love — and how much we want to fucking forget about them for a little while. A little while that always happens to be about two hours, 160 bucks, and however long The Whisper Song is because she threw that one in for free as a birthday present.
If the stripper’s union is keeping track, I’ll be turning 72 this year.
Purses remind us that strippers are still women; and thus slaves to their stupid, womanly desires. With that sort of obnoxious shit making an on-stage cameo, I’m surprised I can still get an erection, let alone a two and a half hour erection.
Strippers wear high heels because heels flex their calf muscles in a way that only an extra hour a day on the elliptical machine would otherwise do. For normal women, heels are a cheap and tawdry trick on your maleness. It’s like a man stuffing his wallet full of Monopoly money and then complaining all night about how hard it is to sit on while everyone else is paying the check.
Strippers are at the gym every second of the day that they’re not chasing ecstasy with a Mr. T’s version of “blending in”.
Heels are a stripper’s 25th Hour.
Purses don’t make your ass look any less fat or your stretch marks look any less like Gorbachev’s turkey chin. If strippers really need another accessory, try a positive attitude or a tax return. That sure as shit doesn’t remind me of anyone’s wife.
Related Articles:
Why didn’t the close 11 see him first? She was what, bringing down grave supplies, or something? Tending cadavers must of been something all women did then? Well, that’s cultural research. Woman’s work, cleaning up all sorts of bodies and waste and such. Go clean the jon, tell me about your epiphany w/ Mr. Clean.
this post wast stupid…..i expected funnier than this
If I want some entertainment, I will sit at home and stuff money into my own underwear. Strip clubs are so fucking over-rated, all full of silicone tits ( which do NOTHING for me whatsoever) In fact, I think the only reason those implants were invented is so that flat-chested women would be afforded the same level of protection as other women when they fall flat on their face, by making asses of themselves, as they are genetically pre-disposed to do.
Everything is about sex to a whore..
Nice, another attack on gays. You use it as an insult, as usual, proof that all gurls are backstabbing sluts.
Yeah women need to stay out of mens love lives, men are so much hotter when they’re fucking other men!
@diamtik I missed this last time. Very good.
-wolfe
I don’t get your point. Are you trying to say that:
1. Jesus was a man
2. The risen Lord had to scold a woman and instruct her to get out of his way so that he could do important stuff (such as ascending into heaven) ?
Sounds accurate to me. He also refers to the disciples as his friends, not hers (even though they partied together). Way to shoot the girl down!
I don’t get your point. Are you trying to say that:
1. Jesus was a man
2. The risen Lord had to scold a woman and instruct her to get out of his way so that he could do important stuff (such as ascending into heaven) ?
The first human to speak with the risen Christ was a woman, Mary of Magdala:
“Jesus saith unto her, Mary. She turned herself, and saith unto Him, Rabboni; which is to say, Master. Jesus saith unto her, Touch me not; for I am not yet ascended to My Father: but go to My brethren, and say unto them, I ascend unto My Father, and your Father; and to My God, and your God. Mary Magdalene came and told the disciples that she had seen the Lord, and that He had spoken these things unto her.” (John 20:16-18 KJV
Alas, honourable lady KellyMac, such incontinent outbursts are common from members of your gender when posting here, which is the exact reason that women are banned. Just look at how much valuable time was wasted trying to comprehend that babble.
Why would I want to go blind? And who is Sue?
Intoxicated post.
Suggesting to learn English before you open your ccokwasher.
suggesting to delete sight why many woman are now rich cause dicks like you. Able to Sue.
Dick,
You’re definitely on to something. You could write 100 posts on strip clubs. Keep it up.
Indeed, and I guess that is why it smells like fish.
Why, Diamatik, what a remarkably precise and poignant analogy!
- Jimmy Hendrix - Anthem
Whilst I detest STDs (or STI or whatever the new buzzword is these days). Women harbour sexually infectious diseases like a fucking petri-dish in the CDC’s lab.
I hate child support payments more.
I hate condoms.
Hahahaha. Genius, all across the board.
“I want to see a stripper with a purse as much as I want to see her with a 300 pound bouncer while she’s walking to her car.”
Hahaha. Anybody who doesn’t agree is a communist.
I thought I was the only one who used that trick.
Whahahaahha!!!!
I ask you Dick…
What do you think of this woman? Just by looking at her, what comes to mind?
http://f1.grp.yahoofs.com/v1/gGqDRnQv12WebkREKUzcfFrd1Jifgg_gh_9RFoUU9 2cQAiF82xq3v_gspqvL52oJmtIC-44NWaKyYCEJh2GO5g/570813788_2fb89a7122_b.j pg
I drew her, and was wondering what suggestions you would have for as you would say “Manproving” her? Not improving as that would be womanly, but “Manproving” or whatever….