How To Shut a Woman Up

Women don’t actually want equality. Women are like the five year old that wants a dog for Christmas and we men are like parents. You’re not getting a fucking dog. Five year olds don’t get dogs because they have no responsibility. They’re immature. They get goldfish or Nintendo’s or other things that don’t require moments from their precious days of doing nothing.

Equality for women is exactly the same. Let me give an example.

There’s six ways to make a woman shut her fucking mouth — and you can count five of them on your hand.

I’m kidding of course. I would never advocate violence against women. Women are like television sets. They’re fun to watch, and smacking them around rarely improves their malfunction. When they start acting up and getting old on you, it’s just time to get a new one.

The sixth way to get a woman to shut the fuck up is not a joke. Women bitch and moan about equality like a baby whinging for its bottle. What happens when a baby gets its bottle? It shuts the fuck up.

Does that sound radical? Giving a woman equality? Perhaps even a bit mad?

Your man-stincts are correct. Giving women equal of anything is a stupid idea: voting rights, custody, slices of delicious pie. No matter what, you end up with something that isn’t pretty and is about ten to twenty years away from biting you in your man ass.

Think about it for a minute. If women really wanted equality, why dress like whores? And why all the silliness with alimony? Alimony is more objectifying and exploitive than prostitution, porno, and the entire Blackula series combined. All it’s saying is that the only thing women can do in the world is fuck for money. It’s a severance package for retired whores. But I digress.

I said earlier that I would be dispensing the mystical secret that has haunted man since the beginning of time. Not where we’re from or where we’re going, but how to shut women the fuck up. It’s easy. All you have to do is speak to them like equals. For example, what would you say if your very good man friend was drunk or hypnotized into losing Man Points and came up with a comment like, “Kathy at work is such a bitch. I don’t know why she hates me.”

Something immediately springs to mind.

“Who the fuck cares.”

Give the baby her bottle. And silence, my man friends, is golden.

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151 Comments in 137 threads.»

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Comment by Female
2006-01-01 17:49:35 - IP Man-Hash: dd1b911ab43ac

Spinmeister, women do not “dress” like whores. Categorising someone based on the way they dress is in the eye of the beholder. Sure, some people dress to make a statement, like youth in sub-cultures, but the average, adult female chooses clothes based on a number of factors, such as,

1. Fashion (if the style is whorish, blame the trendsetting designer of the season, most of whom are male.

2. Climate. When weather is like living in a furnace, you’re not going to get around in three layers of clothing are you? Unless of course, you’re culture is pathologically oppressive (see Taliban/Afganistan). At least their women won’t suffer from too many melanomas.

3. Comfort/financial reasons. If you can’t afford a Sass & Bide dress (forget ebay, they’re all ripoffs, go direct to the factory outlet); your cash strapped and/or got three young children, then you’re typically going to either (a) know nothing about designer clothes, (b) give a shit and (c) have a partner who fees the same. Next stop: Target.

In regards to alimony. Men should pay it, even if (a) he and his former partner never had children, provided former wife did not work during the marriage.

If the ex-wife gave up employment at her ex-husbands request or if her decision to do so was supported by him, this decision would have been based on the thought that their financial situation was stable or would be unchanging for the worse and that of course, the marriage was going to last. Based on these beliefs, the women risked exiting the workplace and all the associated shite that goes with that. Such as, downgrading of skills, inability to save superannuation etc. So, when the marriage breaks down and she is forced into employment, she is behind the eight ball in getting a decent paying job, in proportion to the number of the years of the marriage. The alimony therefore makes up for the payrises etc that she missed out on by not working. Do not think that women do not give up much in the way of things seen and unseen just because they stay at home and do not work in the external world.

 
Comment by TheSpinmeister
2005-12-31 06:54:18 - IP Man-Hash: eeffcc3f4c66e

Think about it for a minute. If women really wanted equality, why dress like whores? And why all the silliness with alimony? Alimony is more objectifying and exploitive than prostitution, porno, and the entire Blackula series combined. All it’s saying is that the only thing women can do in the world is fuck for money. It’s a severance package for retired whores. But I digress.

No, you captured it accurately, you did not digress.

THAT is exactly the question that needs to be asked publically, loudly, and repeatedly. If you want equality, why you do that stoopid sheyt?

Does not help your cause.

The Geezer
http://www.thespinmeister.blogspot.com
http://www.hatemalepost.blogspot.com

 
Comment by Female
2005-12-30 19:31:37 - IP Man-Hash: dc6df4d5c25ad

I so do not care right now. Have a good night.

 
Comment by Arielle
2005-12-30 19:25:33 - IP Man-Hash: 957564b4aff6d

A reference to “figurative” has nothing to do with poetic language, Female. I think you just proved Wolfe’s surmise.

 
Comment by Female
2005-12-30 17:38:05 - IP Man-Hash: dc6df4d5c25ad

wolfe said:

[blockquote removed]

There are two places where one would expect to see your particular combination of arrogance and stupidity: in the mind of a recently promoted $20 dollar a trick streetwalker, and in the mind of a particularly slow-witted circa-1975 feminist.

-wolfe

Not only does this quote confirm my statement that this site does nothing but portray women in only a limited number of ways, one being a whore, the other being either a spinster feminist or a stepford wife, but wolfe, telling us that you know the inside workings of the mind of a streetwalker is a little too much information. Seedy and sordid back alley shenanigans are never a good look.

 
Comment by Female
2005-12-30 17:13:26 - IP Man-Hash: dc6df4d5c25ad

wolfe said:

Have you never heard of figurative language? Pity.

-wolfe

LOL. Okay then, so because it’s figurative, regardless of actual content, it’s supposed to be poetic. You’re hysterical. I can just imagine the type of compliments you must give to your girlfriend when she dresses up to go out. “What’s that sweetheart? Does your arse look big in that? Only in comparison to an airbus, don’t worry about it, where not going anywhere near an airport.”

wolfe said:

You either have done a poor job of financial research to come to the conclusions you came to above, or you are stupider than you appear to be. Your conclusions are, simply put, wrong unless you have grossly unrealistic expectations in some way. I assume it is the former for both; if it’s the latter, fair enough. In either case, I don’t want to waste my time.

-wolfe

Well actually, a software package specifically designed for superannuation calculations did it for me. But if you want to start on insulting the software, I’ll be sure to let it know.

wolfe said:

You’re welcome to irrationally insult

-wolfe

Cheers. I will.

 
Comment by wolfe
2005-12-30 17:00:25 - IP Man-Hash: d754ab99d7c00

Female said:
Pity then that according to you, I actually am an ignorant mule and a cretinous cow with either a mind of a whore

Have you never heard of figurative language? Pity.

In regards to your recent financial advice, I’d hestitate to say you are stating the absolute obvious,

Yes, because from what you’ve written, you need to start again from the obvious, and I didn’t want to waste my time (or that of anyone else) writing more than a paragraph. You either have done a poor job of financial research to come to the conclusions you came to above, or you are stupider than you appear to be. Your conclusions are, simply put, wrong unless you have grossly unrealistic expectations in some way. I assume it is the former for both; if it’s the latter, fair enough. In either case, I don’t want to waste my time.

but then I don’t like embarrassing financial planner wannabe chartered accountants straight out of night school. Now, if you are a futures trader, maybe we can talk.

I’m not a financial planner and have no desire to be one. As part of my career I have hedged large international currency risks, and those I worked with have been very happy. Did that make me a futures trader? No. In any event, if you want to save for your retirement by futures trading, you are a fool.

You’re welcome to irrationally insult (you’ll note I base my insults on actual flaws in what passes for your thinking), but it will guarantee the rest of us simply continue to laugh at your statements.

Don’t engage in a battle of wits when you are unarmed by nature, nurture and practice.

-wolfe

 
Comment by Female
2005-12-30 14:03:39 - IP Man-Hash: dc6df4d5c25ad

Oh I see, so I’m like a deceased diseased infested rodent but not actually one? What a relief. Pity then that according to you, I actually am an ignorant mule and a cretinous cow with either a mind of a whore or a slow witted baby boomer feminist. Your imagination is so entertaining but your bigotry against livestock is disgusting.

In regards to your recent financial advice, I’d hestitate to say you are stating the absolute obvious, but then I don’t like embarrassing financial planner wannabe chartered accountants straight out of night school. Now, if you are a futures trader, maybe we can talk.

 
Comment by wolfe
2005-12-30 13:43:56 - IP Man-Hash: d754ab99d7c00

Female said:

You want to help me out now? After you’ve called me a deceased, diseased infested rodent?

Once again your lack of knowledge of the language fails you. I did not call you a deceased, disease-infested rodent; I merely used a simile.

No, I don’t especially want to help you (though I thought I’d sincerely offer), because you are not a very nice person. You came on these boards, cursed repeatedly, acted like a drunk or drugged lunatic (and even admitted being high at one point), blindly attacked everyone. I was fairly polite (though at times condescending) to you and refrained from like behavior until finally you jumped the shark shortly before Christmas.

I cautioned you you’d lost my respect; rather than apologize, you announced you’d not see the difference in the way I treated you. Perhaps you do now.

In kindness, since I’d hate to see even you reduced to retiring poor, I would suggest you talk (but not take any specific investment advice whatsoever from) a man (or woman) who understands mathematics, stocks, bonds, and hedging to arm yourself with the tools you will need to have to talk to a competent financial planner. Get an inexpensive spreadsheet and learn to use the formulas. You need strategic help from someone who understands mathematics (maybe a relative?) and very basic economics, and tactical/logistical help from a competent financial planner, though you should be very cautious here since a lot are raking a good deal of money off you and offering little or nothing.

Now, kindly mode off, and back to the subject at hand: your appalling activities.

You repeatedly attempt to spread material on these boards that is flatly factually false, ridiculously racist, bizarrely bigoted, and hideously hateful. Your attempts to propagate intellectually incoherent incontinent ideas and moronic memes while all the while displaying a smug stupidity is like the effect of a rat spreading plague. (NB- that’s a simile. See the word “like�? No dear, “simile�, not “smile�. You can look it up).

Credulous minds can be affected, nay, infected by the bigotry, even the stupidity you spew.

There are two places where one would expect to see your particular combination of arrogance and stupidity: in the mind of a recently promoted $20 dollar a trick streetwalker, and in the mind of a particularly slow-witted circa-1975 feminist.

The former verifies Esther’s/Andre Young’s assessment of you; the latter (or the thought you’re Dick’s friend brilliantly playing a crazy woman) my own.
-wolfe

 
Comment by Esther
2005-12-30 11:52:12 - IP Man-Hash: b522825ecb752

To quote the great poet laureate of our time, Andre Young (aka: Dr. Dre):

“Bitches ain’t shit but hoes and tricks.”

The nail has suffered yet another firmly centered blow from the hands of Mr. Masterson via this article.

 
Comment by Female
2005-12-29 19:39:42 - IP Man-Hash: dc6df4d5c25ad

“It comes down to your investment strategies. If you are prepared to invest for the long term, and to vary your retirement up to +/- 7 years, then retirement savings should be quite affordable for you, including even in Australia. I’d happily discuss this offline with you. I commend your intelligence in doing the calculations; I suggest you have probably made some errors or are suffering from lacunae.”

You want to help me out now? After you’ve called me a deceased, diseased infested rodent? Some nerve you’ve got there buddy. As I do not know your qualifications and it seems likely you’d really like to send me down the river in a pine box, don’t take offense when I say thanks, but no fucking thanks.

 
Comment by Grump
2005-12-29 18:44:29 - IP Man-Hash: 7f5a0b2070dae

Nice job, wolfe.

 
Comment by wolfe
2005-12-29 18:33:33 - IP Man-Hash: d754ab99d7c00

This is a surprisingly lucid post from you, so I shall respect it and you as such.

Here are the problems:

1. Women’s retirement age should be later than mens (based on sound public policy) since they live longer. To have it sooner than men inevitably hurts a woman’s ability to contribute and drains the public pension system vampirically. The fact that it isn’t benefits happily married men (their wife can retire with them; women still tend to marry older men), and all women. Own goal, there.

2. It comes down to your investment strategies. If you are prepared to invest for the long term, and to vary your retirement up to +/- 7 years, then retirement savings should be quite affordable for you, including even in Australia. I’d happily discuss this offline with you. I commend your intelligence in doing the calculations; I suggest you have probably made some errors or are suffering from lacunae.

3. “When a woman exits the workforce for a time…” in this day and age, she chooses to. In most countries she is able to continue to contribute to pensions, etc. on a maternity leave basis. I’m not familiar with Australian public policy on the matter, but I am familiar with both American, British and Canadian, and they are all (federally in the US/Canada case) reasonably generous.

No, alimony is what Dick says it is, and it has, despite your arguments, nothing to do with child support.

Nice job, friend of Dick.

-wolfe

 
Comment by Female
2005-12-29 17:18:41 - IP Man-Hash: dc6df4d5c25ad

In my country there is such a thing as superannuation which is intended to replace the govt. pension for retired workers. It involves the govt. garnishing 9% of salary/wages automatically before tax from your pay packet and putting it into a managed fund. You cannot access this fund until you retire. Retirement age in Australia for men is 65 and 63 for women. The pension will not exist by the time I retire and people will therefore be expected to live on their superannuation and whatever else they managed to save during their working life.

I calculated during my mid 20’s that I would have to save $1800 per month from my salary (on top of the 9% annual super) just to have enough money to live on when I retire (based on CPI indexes, and a 20 year retirement period). This is impossible.

When a woman exits the workforce for a period of time to raise children she effectively gives up the capacity to save superannuation. Hence, whether or not children are involved or even if they are no longer of dependent age, a man should pay alimony as a kind of backpay for her years out of the workforce, spent cleaning his house and taking care of their personal business.

 
Comment by wolfe
2005-12-29 17:07:17 - IP Man-Hash: d754ab99d7c00

No, she deserves no alimony, and you present no argument that she does. Do you even know the meaning of the word?

Child support is very distinct from alimony, or are you that ignorant?

Excellent points, Dick and Oldone.

-wolfe

 
Comment by Female
2005-12-29 16:53:18 - IP Man-Hash: dc6df4d5c25ad

Well spotted dick.

Re: hypothetical alimony scenerio

If former wife gets sole custody of children and has the responsibility of raising them and working full-time, do you still think she should not be entitled to alimony? Why should the man not continue to support his own children?

 
Comment by Oldone
2005-12-29 15:57:08 - IP Man-Hash: e2d025f19e31f

So true Dick, giving equality to women is as giving pearls to swine. They know not what to do with it, so, mystified; they shut up and leave you alone. Excellent point Dick I could not agree more.

 
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