Women Feel Sorry For Lamps and Old Chairs and Shit
If you have an agenda that you know is fucking stupid, but want to make some quick loot out of it there’s only one place to go. That’s right it’s to your nearest woman.
Women are retarded when it comes to using their empathy. That’s because empathy is in your brain not your heart or your stomach as all women believe.
Look around your man-self right now. To you, you exist in a world of inanimate objects. Unless you’re on the tube or at the zoo or something, but since you’re a man, you wouldn’t bring up something so inane and counterproductive. That’s what being a man is about; not sounding like an obnoxious twat every chance you get.
There may be a few men around you at the moment, but otherwise there’s nothing but objects. What if someone came in and took one of those objects away — for repairs or something? As a man you would think this was jolly good. Most things need repairing after all. It’s good to know some man is doing it and not some woman. A woman, however, women would be heartbroken.
“The poor item!” she would say. “He’s being taken away from all his other item friends!”
I kid you not.
Now lets say you accidentally knocked one of those precious little bullshit items off your desk. You, as a man, would be disappointed that someone had to clean it up, but otherwise the item would be easily replaced. A woman would be heartbroken. Fucking heartbroken. She would probably start an hour long crying jag in the bathroom or take a sick day. I don’t know. I try not involve myself with what goes on in the ladies room. It’s disgusting.
Women feel sorry for anything and everything. They feel sorry for sofas left out in the rain; they feel sorry for chairs with broken arm rests that no one wants to sit in any more; they feel sorry for sacks of meat with fur wrapped around them; they feel fucking sorry for empty ice trays and men who kick the living shit out of them. None of it makes any sense and none of it is interesting at all.
That’s why women have ruined PETA and Green Peace — and marriage. It’s one thing to say, “You know what, I might not think it’s appropriate for a dog to get dragged down the highway for ten kilometers. Maybe I should get involved in that cause.” But for women, throwing a kitten off of a building is the same as doing it with a penny. They just can’t draw the fucking line and that’s why they’re like cows with cash for milk.
Women don’t know anything about lines. Lines are hard and straight and get the job done. All women know anything about is curves. Big fucking fat ones that need to stop eating and need to go to the gym.
Oh and for your manformation, a penny doesn’t go through anyone if you drop it off a building. That’s a myth. A kitten might though. I haven’t read anything to the contrary.
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Women always think they are more creative than men because they can have babies. They think of it as “creating a life”. If birth was an act of creation, then why many babies born ugly or deformed or sick?(Much less so these days because of medical advances made mostly by men.) Do they do this on purpose? Of course not! Having a baby is an act of REPRODUCTION! It is a biological function! They have no more control over the process than men do. If they could control it, there would most likely be ALOT more women out there, and they would all be good looking!
Men rule!
And with good reason.
I quite agree, diamatik. And good one on the ‘lonely beer’, Lukasz. Dick commenting on the penny urban myth made me remember this.
When I read it, for old time’s sake, I was struck by how much the writing reminded me of someone:
-wolfe
That is rather funny diamatik. Women always do claim to have more artistic talent than men, yet honestly all the great artists, painters sculpters that come to mind are all male.
I hear you Dick on the feeling sorry for things, happens all the time in my life, although in a rather amusing way last time, “that poor steak is alone, you should eat it.” I did, I also drank the last beer too, only because I couldn’t stand to hear bitching about how the beer was lonely
For a moment there, I thought this was going to be another post on Germaine Greer.
-Big Al
Perhaps that is why many women can claim like ‘art’ but yet there are very few female architects. Architecture involves lot of lines. Lines and logic go hand-in-hand, and I think we all know the relationship between women and logic; they’re mutually exclusive.