Curse Words Make Sugar-Plum Fairies Cry
I can’t count the number of times I’ve been chastised by a raving schoolmarm (who should have been minding her own fucking business) for tossing a few baudy, blue color words into a conversation. As a man I use swear words, or “sentence enhancers” as I call them, with extreme discretion and in proper taste at all times. That doesn’t seem to be enough for women though.
And why would it be? It is perfectly reasonable.
Women say that swearing is uncouth or inappropriate. What I say to that is, are you fucking serious? That’s the stupidest of shit that I have ever heard it. And I’ve heard plenty of stupid shit.
The real reason women hate swearing is because they actually think curse words are magical.
It’s no secret that women believe in fairies and Easter bunnies and princesses in far away castles and ogres and bullshit. They’re raised on it like calves on bonemeal, and it’s so ingrained in their psyches that the process of inventing wildly delusional and fantasic drama governs the entire rest of their lives.
The truth is that swearing puts asses in the seats. Swearing gives something with no credibility a shitload of it — like ten times. Swearing is how you make a good point a fucking great point.
That’s yet another reason why men are better than women. Because we men like to make things better with our man-tools, be they physical (like a wrench or an anvil) or figurative (like swearing, or thinking, or a round of fisticuffs). Points, seats, quality of life; it’s all the same in a man’s world — something to improve.
A woman, on the other hand, prefers to invent crazy reasons not to use the tools readily available to her in order to achieve. In this case I’m talking about Casper the Ghost and Scooby the Boogeyman who both hate swearing so much that I guess they’ll commit suicide if they hear you doing it. I think I speak for all of us men when I say: You gotta be fucking shitting me here.
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July 15th, 2005 at 7:44 am - IP Man-Hash: 7c9ec4269a80e
Fuck that shit man!
July 15th, 2005 at 10:31 am - IP Man-Hash: fa48aa19ef342
Oh please, perhaps you should try to attempt to have an actual conversation with an adult woman and even an idiot could see she does not believe in “sugar plum fairies”.
Besides are you really telling me you didn’t use to believe in Father Christmas? If you didn’t I feel bad for you that you had such an unhappy upbringing (Although that probably does explain a lot on this site…).
By the way, I suggest you look at some of the more violent posts from women on this site and even you couldn’t fail to notice that not all women refrain from swearing.
July 15th, 2005 at 6:14 pm - IP Man-Hash: 3f6f1bc89c9c0
One of the most bullshit trends in the poker world today is the “no fuck” rule. In some card rooms and in some tournaments people aren’t allowed to say fuck or they will suffer a 10 minute penalty (or in my case, when saying “that’s fucking bullshit” to the floorman who warned me, get kicked out of the card room).
And who the fuck is “Father Christmas”? The name is Santa Claus you wantwit.
July 15th, 2005 at 10:24 pm - IP Man-Hash: fd4a5943b43b8
“The real reason women hate swearing is because they actually think curse words are magical.”
Talk about getting to the heart of the fucking matter. Dick, you’ve outdone yourself.
July 16th, 2005 at 2:56 pm - IP Man-Hash: cc0d45fa29251
Fucking brilliant, dude. In relation to one of your other writing, Dick, women hate and mis-use cursing as much as they mis-use sarcasm. In addition to the safety class for women to use sarcasm, I believe a schooling on profanity use should also be put into place for women to stop fucking it up so badly. The other option, and most likely better option, is that women are banned from curse words altogether.
July 16th, 2005 at 11:49 pm - IP Man-Hash: b4de96109b641
You men all sound like a bunch of demented fools. Swearing does nothing for a conversation as it is verbal junk food, and just lowers the intelligence level of a conversation.
That is all I have to say about this foolishness.
Kaoru
July 17th, 2005 at 10:28 pm - IP Man-Hash: fd4a5943b43b8
Dick is a man, and therefore cannot engage in ‘foolishness’. q.e.d.
July 18th, 2005 at 2:21 am - IP Man-Hash: 76897c96619f9
Verbal junk food huh? Clearly, from the size of your arse, you’ve been eating a bit of it. Fuckwit.
July 18th, 2005 at 6:35 am - IP Man-Hash: 8fb1825ebd593
I think it’s a crock of shit when people ask me not to cuss, it’s my language I’ll use it how I want, now piss off.
July 28th, 2005 at 6:56 am - IP Man-Hash: 46d8304bbb9af
CB how stupid are you, when you want to lower yourself to personal insults because you have noting better to say then at least comment on something you can actually see. You know what her arse looks like how exactly?
By the way Dick, I can think of no one less qualified to decide what women think.