Take Two Of These And Call Me Never
Men are better at being sick than women. We’re better at getting sick too, which is another point. Because nine out of ten times you do not actually need a fucking jacket when some nagging woman says you do, and that’s called being efficient any way you slice it. Any man will tell you that. From eight to eighty.
Men being better than women at being sick simply means no whining, no complaining, no hideous sweat pants, no watching fuck the libido horseshit on Oxygen all day, no cravings, no massive weight gaining for three days, no mini-vacations, no crying jags, and no moratoriums on oral sex.
Men don’t pull any of that ridiculous shit.
The thing to keep in mind here is that most women are faking it when they claim to be sick. They get a sniffle and its SARS. They drop a tea kettle on their pinkie toe and it’s broken and probably has gangrene. They suck at reading and speaking (and they all do) and all of the fucking sudden they have Adult ADD or dyslexia or some horseshit that they have never mentioned to a medical professional. Yea. Nice bullshit, bullshitter.
Even if women really are sick when they say they are — unlikely — they’re not trying to get better by carrying on like a stuck pig. When they’re doing is putting on a production of Taming the Shrew and guess who the fuck is co-starring.
I know what you’re thinking men. All this is true, but how can we know it. Easy.
Women have better fucking immune systems than men. Women don’t even know what an immune system is, but it’s 100% totally true and I would bet my life on it.
I don’t have any facts to prove it though — except for this. Women cram enough chocolate and Bon-Bons and fucking Cherry Garcia ice cream down their fucking throats to get diabetes faster than you can say Low Carb Brownies. How the hell do you explain that? I’ll tell you how with my mighty man reason. A super charged resistance to diabetes and illness.
I’m rocking the boat here and I know it. A healthier immune system seems like a good thing. After all, men are smarter and stronger than women and those are important reasons why men are better than women at everything. Shouldn’t having a better immune system make women better than men at something?
No. No, no, fuck no it doesn’t.
Does giving women more handouts in the workplace or in the universities make them any better at working or thinking? No. Does buying a woman a luxury SUV because she got tired of her old car make her a better driver or not an ingrate? No it fucking doesn’t and there’s plenty of evidence for that, just go for a drive or hold a door open for a woman.
It’s like I’ve always said. You can lead a horse to water, but you can’t make her drink.
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September 17th, 2005 at 11:52 pm - IP Man-Hash: 1538755af1fc1
I think you are a complete fucking jackass who really needs to fucking grow the fuck up and get a damn life, u say that “they’re not trying to get better by carrying on like a stuck pig.” well ur not trying to do shit by just bitching about how men are better than women so stfu and go fuck urself
September 18th, 2005 at 9:05 am - IP Man-Hash: ac62c77584632
I think it’s spelled Enus.
-Dick
September 19th, 2005 at 10:59 pm - IP Man-Hash: 3f6f1bc89c9c0
What an apropos name, Anus. Mr. Masterson is “bitching” about woman here as much as Isaac Newton was “bitching” about math in the pages of Principia Mathematica. Men do not “bitch”. We write and talk about things that are worthwhile, which is pretty much the opposite of what a women does whenever she’s lucky enough to put together a cogent sentence.
September 21st, 2005 at 6:54 pm - IP Man-Hash: f397625caf295
I concur
September 21st, 2005 at 11:50 pm - IP Man-Hash: 196fb9ba4f53d
ok…. so, by now we have all established that these ppl have no lives…. but, seriously, i cant not comment…. it is narrow minded pricks like you that are ruining this world….. and if u want to start basing your image of women of a non exsistant school girl, i will do the same…. who was it that blew up the twin towers? a man, infact, most terrorist are men…. i dont know about you, but ive only heard of one female terrorist…. and what the fuck is that dan faggot talking about “whenever she’s lucky enough to put together a cogent sentance”, gee, what the hell have i been doing? i guess ive just been making rambling noises my whole life…. not all women “bitch”, you just dont get out enough to realise that you are living in a pointless life based on lies, stereotypes and prejudice…. i hope you die a horrible firey death…. oh, and another point, who’s nipple did u suck and bite to get the nutrients required to liver for the first few months of your life?
September 22nd, 2005 at 7:26 am - IP Man-Hash: ac62c77584632
“what the fuck is that dan faggot talking about”
“you are living in a pointless life based on lies, stereotypes and prejudice”
What a tangled web you weave, sera.
And was that nipple sucking question rhetorical? I’ve sucked many nipples, you’re going to have to be more specific.
-Dick
September 22nd, 2005 at 1:41 pm - IP Man-Hash: 5a9457f579c3d
There are four posters above who can construct coherent grammatical sentences that don’t include ad-hominem insults, random cursing, lack of capitalization, or bizarre typos, etc.
There are two that seem unable to accomplish this rather basic function. No guesses as to which side of the argument they come down on.
Jason has perhaps the best response; seeing what Dan wrote, and agreeing with it, he simply writes “I concur”. No endless non-paragraph of womanly whining, just a short concise erudite statement.
Dick, do you pay people like Sera and Anus to comment on your blog? Just curious. I guess moths can be drawn to flames…
-Wolfe
September 22nd, 2005 at 2:44 pm - IP Man-Hash: f3ae1ac46a2e3
I sure don’t. If I did though, it would be a good investment in hilarious entertainment. I think we can all agree on that much.
-Dick
September 22nd, 2005 at 3:21 pm - IP Man-Hash: 5a9457f579c3d
I stand in awe, good sir, of your ability to spontaneously generate so much entertainment without paying for it.
While men are skilled at creating — plays, movies, circuses, freakshows — usually the actors/freaks have to be paid. Impressive job.
September 22nd, 2005 at 7:36 pm - IP Man-Hash: f397625caf295
I concur again (just to piss ‘em off).
September 23rd, 2005 at 3:14 am - IP Man-Hash: 3f6f1bc89c9c0
“… you just dont get out enough to realise [blah blah blah]…”
I get out plenty. Quite the man of the town I might add.
“…who’s nipple did u suck and bite to get the nutrients required to liver for the first few months of your life?”
Seriously ladies, is this the only thing you have to fall back on? A warm hole to grow stuff in and two spigots that dole out a substanse only an infant could palate? Give it a rest.
September 25th, 2005 at 3:23 pm - IP Man-Hash: 56806c0431943
Oh please, when men have a cold they act as though their dying.
If men had to get pregnant, they would stay at home the whole nine months bitching about it.
September 25th, 2005 at 3:41 pm - IP Man-Hash: bbdbd8f85eb8a
Nicole,
Who are this “men” that you refer to dying from a cold? Surely, in your long, experienced life you have met so many of these “men.” Do you really feel you have enough experience in life to debate grown men and win? Do you understand life at the tender age of 16 or 17? Did you ever stop to wonder why the women of our comparable ages are not replying? They either are:
1. too busy watching desperate housewives/footballers’ wives eating Doritoes by the handful, or
2. realize that they have nothing to add–we are right and they know it.
You are not a very good representative of the female side when you are not actually a woman yourself.
September 25th, 2005 at 4:41 pm - IP Man-Hash: d43a158ad3229
jason, get a life. you are argueing with a teenager. even my brother, a MALE, can see that you are loosing the fuck out of this arguement. and please, can we get back to the actual arguements rather than just the grammer and spelling?
September 25th, 2005 at 5:15 pm - IP Man-Hash: 1c02f21d37550
What and spelling?
-Dick
September 26th, 2005 at 8:24 am - IP Man-Hash: 681f2e2cfc31a
so, in your post, Ness, are you saying that arguing with a teenager is not worth my time? I’m not sure I understand where the stats are that point to my “arguement” is losing. Dick, am I losing?
September 26th, 2005 at 9:32 am - IP Man-Hash: 56806c0431943
Of cource I am a women, I’m old enough to be married and have children after all. Besides it’s a proven fact that gilrs mature older than boys.