Women Invented Taxes: Part 1
Two things in life are inevitable: taxes and women’s fuckups.
Holy shit! What if they’re actually the same thing?
They are the same thing! Women invented taxes.
Let’s take a look at all the precious things my fucking tax dollars pay for. I hate the shit out of taxes. I’m a man and I don’t like getting fucked for something I don’t want to pay for. That’s what they do at beauty salons, or so I’ve heard. They nickel and dime you to death with wax heating charges and appointment guarantee fees. They probably do that at vagina doctors too, but I don’t know shit about vagina doctoring.
Cops
Women are the only reason we need policemen — especially lady policemen. Women post their phone numbers on their MySpace pages for fuck’s sake. Do you need any more proof?
If there were no women, there would be no violent crime. In a world of men only, anyone walking around being a cocksucker and trying to steal shit or beat someone up would get his fucking ass handed to him. Not so in a world of women. Violent crime is rampant because women are easy targets. That’s where taxes come in.
Taxes pay for the protection of women. I don’t get why everyone says the Middle East has it so fucked up. The women there can’t walk outside without a man. How is that different than the way it is here? Women in Europe and America can’t walk outside without a man either. It’s just that in our version, the man is wearing a badge and at the end of the day he sends me a fucking bill.
Schools
I went to public school and I had mostly women teachers. Women gravitate toward teaching because it’s an easy job that deserves no respect — just like stripping. I can say for certain that on any average day, I bestow upon random children more juicy gems of knowledge than any school will ever have in its publicly funded library or in its staff of publicly funded women. I say shit to kids and they say, “Wow we never thought of it like that.” Teachers would murder each other for that kind of response and I don’t even have to try.
I’m a man and children respect that men don’t ingratiate themselves to a bunch of money-grubbing rug rats.
If women weren’t so much worse than men at educating, we wouldn’t need schools. We would just send kids into the salt mines for their eight birthday.
“Happy birthday, Shitmouth. Prepare to be educated.”
Fuck, that’s manly.
Roads
Without women, the only cars available would be four wheel drive. Lamborghini’s would be four wheel drive and would reach top speeds of a thousand miles an hour.
Men are better than women.
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April 10th, 2007 at 6:37 am - IP Man-Hash: eb0193ec17432
Good article, Dick. Only wish it was longer.
Ever notice how government is usually stuffed with women?
It’s a dream job for them: They can sit around all day, spending other people’s money on shit nobody really wants. And no matter what happens (because there’s no accountability in the public service) they cannot get fired!
April 10th, 2007 at 9:28 am - IP Man-Hash: 133a528274b9c
They can. But the big boys call it assassination.
April 10th, 2007 at 9:31 am - IP Man-Hash: 133a528274b9c
Actually just plain murder because you have to be really important to consider assassinated.
April 10th, 2007 at 12:53 pm - IP Man-Hash: 6a4d315fdc249
I would like to think that the force of the state to institutionalize our children under the threat of force into a obviously decrepit feminine system of education(brainwashing, etc), This nanny/mommy state has been propping up the weak and stupid for generations… crime, violence… result. A teachers pay should actually be based on results. there is alot more to that assertion….
April 10th, 2007 at 1:35 pm - IP Man-Hash: 133a528274b9c
Commision fee perhaps.
April 10th, 2007 at 4:16 pm - IP Man-Hash: dd8cbf9989b0b
A results-based approach has been suggested in several jurisdictions in North America and has been aggressively opposed by the teachers’ unions. I wonder why?
April 10th, 2007 at 5:53 pm - IP Man-Hash: d22c2cf91a332
“toward teaching because it’s an easy job that deserves no respect.”
-it’s more work than writing posts about why mabtw. i respect teachers; they really are under-appreciated. they do more than just teach. honestly. btw a lot of my teachers are male too, it’s about half-half.
April 10th, 2007 at 5:56 pm - IP Man-Hash: d22c2cf91a332
^and no, i’m not saying all those things b/c i plan on teaching.
April 10th, 2007 at 6:07 pm - IP Man-Hash: 6db420228106d
Okay class, now were gonna have a show of hands to see who cares about what sandra has to say. Oh, just as I figured. sandra, shut up and go away.
April 11th, 2007 at 3:03 pm - IP Man-Hash: 02a835d9d7776
Power steering was created foe women.
April 11th, 2007 at 3:07 pm - IP Man-Hash: 02a835d9d7776
Power brakes, dishwashers, microwave ovens, vaccum claeaners, mcdonalds, Bk’s, 1000 tiolet bowls cleaners, AAA auto service. was created to the market of lazy American women.
Bob Drew
April 12th, 2007 at 1:48 am - IP Man-Hash: 980cc8a8ac1a7
Well, the hydramatic(popular umbrella term here for all makes and builds of automatic hydraulic transmission systems) was and certainly is aimed at the American public. As is power steering. They’re also not aimed exclusively at the American public.
Jaguar were among the first manufacturers to adopt disk brake systems for a competitive edge in professional motor racing and general racing performance of their machines.
Neither assisted brakes nor power steering are in any way detrimental to the pleasurable experience of driving a motor vehicle though it may be argued they help asses and women perform better behind the wheel, albeit marginally.
If anything, they arguably boost overall performance and driveability for racing purposes mainly with increased safety an intrinsic bonus. Both are core parts of the performance package of the machine.
You still need quite a deal of skill to drift the car (which would clearly be almost impossible with drum brakes alone) or be competitive in racing.
It’s just that you can afford to break later and for less time, improving the average.
You see, here in Europe we tend to occasionally race on something other than a dead straight, mile long stretch of tarmac with drag queen chutes tucked behind the driver or endlessly run about a slanted asphalt doughnuts with race presets and radius offset tires to have the car steer almost by itself.
Always to the right or always to the left, dependent merely on whether you’re going clockwise or counterclockwise upon the doughnut.
That’s not motor racing. That’s just plain gay.
Not that there’s anything wrong with that.
They might as well hire ‘female drivers.’
Automatic transmissions, on the other hand, have no redeeming merit whatsoever. Their only purpose is to ease ‘the chore’ of driving for dolts and women.
They degrade performance, fuel efficiency and reliability. They also decrease range and endurance autonomy because they need more frequent servicing.
This is completely true of all but the most recent automatic fixed ratio transmission implementations while even these are less robust than a manual transmission. Hardly adequate for high performance racing.
It does not surprise anyone that the American market is where the automatic transmission is queen and almost ubiquitous. Far more widespread than can be reasonably excused away as the result of lady drivers’ choice of vehicle options.
Here, thankfully, automatic transmissions are still firmly the odd and somewhat queer exception to rather than the general rule. And almost all by preference of some self styled ‘lady drivers.’
April 12th, 2007 at 3:35 pm - IP Man-Hash: bc3ec0b747766
With every new government program was created, with every new government alphabet agency setup, with every new complication added to the tax code, some women somewhere asked their pimps in government a stupid question and got a prompt answer.
April 15th, 2007 at 7:16 pm - IP Man-Hash: de2824ad80b1a
Dick,
You are the one that’s so fucking stupid. Your dick must be the size of a pencil’s eraser. Women are very important in this world. If it weren’t for a women your sorry fucking ass wouldn’t even be here. You fucking worhtless and trust me, your going to hell. The army’s leaders are 95% all men and look how many people are dead because of your gender! You are such a fat ugly asshole. You must really like to get fucked in the asshole don’t you? You have no clue about shit. I bet you never made it out of high school too. What did your mother do to you that makes you hate women so much? Did she abandon you? Was she killed by your abusive father? You need a lot of help. This world would be nowhere with out women.
Fuck you,
Haley
April 15th, 2007 at 7:20 pm - IP Man-Hash: e36376410e1aa
Is that your idea of help?
-Dick
April 15th, 2007 at 7:27 pm - IP Man-Hash: de2824ad80b1a
No, I’m ask you questions to find out why you hate women so much. My idea of help would be to get you long term intensive psychotherapy. Really, what happened in your childhood?
-Haley
April 15th, 2007 at 7:35 pm - IP Man-Hash: e36376410e1aa
I don’t hate women.
-Dick
April 16th, 2007 at 2:42 am - IP Man-Hash: 980cc8a8ac1a7
Haley’s on the rag, isn’t she?
Is it true that if you’re bit by a chav cunt on the rag you’ll start bleeding too? Dear me.
Biohazard.
- Nelly Furtado - All Good Things (Come To An End)
April 16th, 2007 at 3:57 am - IP Man-Hash: d4fa8b220332f
Its hard not to sometimes though is it.
More like you are being a bitch. This site is not meant for you. Good day.
April 18th, 2007 at 12:14 am - IP Man-Hash: 8390bde6b8a09
Ok i just stubbled across this website while i ws doing an assignment on Germaine Greer. Even though i’m a man i have to agree with SOME of haleys points. I don’t think it is right for men to assume that they are better than women simply because of gender, i have alot of extremly interesting and strong female friends. My sister is a kickboxer and has proved in many ring fights that she can easily beat men….not exactly helping your cause….and before you say it my sister is not butch and does not look like a man….shes 156cm 56kg and has a slim build and to look at her you wouldnt guess how strong she really is. I jsut wanted to make the point that in this day and age women are not considered less simply due to gender and i think your ideas are outdated and your not exactly going about the right way to get layed…..chicks aint gonna screw you if your gonna be a stuck up dick by claiming your beta than her…..there more likely to get you all reved up and set you out in the cold……and believe me women do like sex…..jsut not with idiots like you